Wakinamama wanaolea watoto bila baba (single mothers): Sababu, athari kwa mtoto, changamoto na mitazamo ya jamii

[King’asti]

Nimetokea background yenye unyanyapaa wa hali ya juu kwa single moms (seriously, kuna mpwa wangu anadate single mom, kila siku tunajadili vumbi la kusema anaoa. Uzuri he is 38, ana ubavu wa kukomaa). Sipendi kuona a single mom anabaguliwa. Kwa sababu single dads wako happy and proud. Kama mwanamke ambae hana mtoto anaweza kuishi na mtoto wa mwanaume wake, why not vice versa?

Please King'asti, naomba uangalie jimbu langu kwa dada Kaunga....

Babu DC!!

 

[Dark City]

Nimetokea background yenye unyanyapaa wa hali ya juu kwa single moms (seriously, kuna mpwa wangu anadate single mom, kila siku tunajadili vumbi la kusema anaoa. Uzuri he is 38, ana ubavu wa kukomaa). Sipendi kuona a single mom anabaguliwa. Kwa sababu single dads wako happy and proud. Kama mwanamke ambae hana mtoto anaweza kuishi na mtoto wa mwanaume wake, why not vice versa?

To me it applies to both....

Ninachoongelea ni facts, practices and experience zangu.....

Ndiyo maana, kama ningepata nafasi ya kutoa ushauri, that would be my words.....

But it doesn't mean that I don't sympathise with single parents of either sex!!

By the way, nina marafiki wengi (hata hapa hapa JF) ambao wako kwenye hiyo hali...and this is what I always share with them...

Babu DC!!

 

[Franky]

Kwa nini usichukue fresh product mkafundishana hayo unayoyataka??

Au wewe unataka wenzio wakutafunie uje kumeza tu.....

I can smell evil here....

Babu DC!!

The problem is that you want the world to rotate on your will. That's a mistake comrade! Everybody has the right to choose whom to be with and whom to love despite all the circumstances, negatives, challenges. Dont worry you can acclimatize to any situation, that's the power of human being, adapt and overcome.

 

[cheichei2010]

sun wu,

Huo sio ushauri mzuri.Huwezi kuwa na mahusiano na mtu mwenye watoto,halafu wewe ndio ujifanye kuwa baba wa hao watoto.fikiria mnapokorofishana na kuachana.Atakae kuja nae awe kama baba wa watoto.Huko ni kuwaharibu watoto kisaikolojia.No wonder leo hii taifa linakuwa na watu wa ajabu ajabu.Msingi wa kuwa mume au mke ni kuwa na familia itakayotunzwa pamoja.Once kama ikatokea mparanganyiko wa ama mmoja wa wanandoa kufariki au kutengana,mahusiano yoyote yatakayozaliwa, hayapaswi kuwa ya wazi kwa watoto.Kimsingi yanatakiwa kuwa ya siri.Lakini siku hizi yanawekwa wazi ez if ni jambo zuri.

 

[Dark City]

The problem is that you want the world to rotate on your will. That's a mistake comrade! Everybody has the right to choose whom to be with and whom to love despite all the circumstances, negatives, challenges. Dont worry you can acclimatize to any situation, that's the power of human being, adapt and overcome.

If there is no sign of ill intentions, ...I do agree with you comrade.....

By the way, we know the world based on ourselves and not others....!!

 

[Anna Msowoya]

Mi nadhani kujitambua ndio tatizo, As a man ni lazima jpate muda wa kufikiria who you are? na ukipata jibu haina aja ya kukatisha uhusiano bali nikutafuta jinsi ya kukabiliana na kila hali

We are never a priority!!!. Tuki act tofauti na sisi kutokana na changamoto hiyo, tunaonekana kama wanaume tusiojali. Zipi ni njia za kukabiliana na changamoto hii kwa vijana chini ya umri wa miaka 35 (close to 30): Je ni kuachana na wanawake wa aina hii au kuna namna ya kuendeleza uhusiano wenye rutuba?

 

[Franky]

If there is no sign of ill intentions, ...I do agree with you comrade.....By the way, we know the world based on ourselves and not others....!!

Yah u have to assess yourself first and understand what does you want, and then go for it no matter what, good for you, you purely understood what your world is filled with,,,...

 

[sun wu]

Huo sio ushauri mzuri.Huwezi kuwa na mahusiano na mtu mwenye watoto,halafu wewe ndio ujifanye kuwa baba wa hao watoto.fikiria mnapokorofishana na kuachana.Atakae kuja nae awe kama baba wa watoto.Huko ni kuwaharibu watoto kisaikolojia.No wonder leo hii taifa linakuwa na watu wa ajabu ajabu.Msingi wa kuwa mume au mke ni kuwa na familia itakayotunzwa pamoja.Once kama ikatokea mparanganyiko wa ama mmoja wa wanandoa kufariki au kutengana,mahusiano yoyote yatakayozaliwa, hayapaswi kuwa ya wazi kwa watoto.Kimsingi yanatakiwa kuwa ya siri.Lakini siku hizi yanawekwa wazi ez if ni jambo zuri.

Mkuu hivi kujifanya kuwa baba ndio kupi ? Narudia maneno niliyoyasema hapo chini:-

Kuhusu malezi ya mtoto kama hataki ushauri hapo kuna walakini inabidi kama unatoa issue za maana kuhusu mtoto akusikilize na kama hafanyi hivyo ni kumweleza anayofanya sio poa, kwako wala kwa mtoto nyie kama wazazi inabidi kushauriana kwenye malezi, lakini as a mother ni vema kuwamchia awe na final say.

Sasa mkuu wewe unapokuwa na mke wako ambae anamtoto wa baba mwingine (kumbuka wewe pia ni mlezi wa huyo mtoto) unataka kuniambia mtoto huyo afanye anachotaka hata kama anapotoka..., just imagine baba yake mzazi yupo kaburini wewe utamsubiri amjie kwenye ndoto kumshauri sababu wewe usijifanye baba ?

Hivi kujifanya Baba ni kupi (kumsaidia mtoto malezi ni kujifanya baba).., kumbuka hapo nimesema nyie kama walezi/wazazi sababu mtaaza zaidi inabidi kushaurina kwenye malezi bora ila nimesema mama mwenye mtoto awe na final say..., Ila wewe unasema ushauri mzuri wafanye mapenzi ya kujificha (je wakizaa pamoja waendelee kujificha ?)

 

[Franky]

Kama love is blind, basi usilione hilo la yeye kupenda mtoto wake zaidi

Unajua kuna wivu mwingine wa kijinga sana, ndo ule tunaoambiwa dont try this at home...hasa huo wa kumuonea wivu dogo eti kisa anapendwa na mama ake, men nid to grow some brass balls... mi siwezi kuwa affected na huo upendo hasa hasa ntauchochea...am jus sayin'

 

[cheichei2010]

sun wu,

Kumbuka wengi wa wanaodate hawa single mothers ,sio watu ambao wamefuata utaratibu rasmi.wengi wa hawa ni mahawara wako for their interest.Sasa hawara hawa wanaweza fundisha maadili gani?wengi wao pia wanaweza kuwa na umri mdogo kuliko watoto wa huyo wanaye date nae?watoto wa huyo mama wanakuwa kwenye position ipi?jiweke kwenye position ya hao watoto halafu jiulize wewe huwa unakua na hali gani,pindi jitu ambalo sio babako,unajua linamchakachua mama yako,halafu linataka kujua maisha ya familia yenu yanaendaje.Sio kitu rahisi kama kinavyochukuliwa.

 

[Franky]

Duh, ina maana single mothers hatufai kwa 'matumizi ya binadamu' (hatustahili kupendwa)?

Matumizi ya binadamu' hehehehe nimechekaje hapo...

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

Why date a mother in the first place??


Babu DC!!

Hahah Babu hapa unanithibitishia uwongo wa ile methali sijui usemi wa Love doesnt ask why........................
Salute.

 

[Kaunga]

Matumizi ya binadamu' hehehehe nimechekaje hapo...

Nasikia kuna masilicon life size robots yametengenezwa, ngoja nizitafute ili waniprogramie la kwangu, maana kunyanyapaliwa kumezidi! LOL

 

[Kaunga]

Hahah Babu hapa unanithibitishia uwongo wa ile methali sijui usemi wa Love doesnt ask why........................
Salute.

Yaani umepotea kama Amani ya Mtwara; welcome back bidada.

 

[Kaunga]

Kijana wa miaka 30 akadate mdada wa miaka 29 mwenye mtoto wa miaka 3, makuzi yenu ya Mwaka 1947 yanasemaje????

Siyo hivyo dada yangu Kaunga,

Kwa makuzi yangu ya 1947, nililelewa kutambua kuwa mothers date dads and boys date girls...

Is that not cute??

Babu DC!!

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

Yaani umepotea kama Amani ya Mtwara; welcome back bidada.

Aksante Da Mkubwa nilijificha kidogo kuibuka nakutana na hizi habari loh.............haya ngoja nijiandae nami niunge foleni yako maana mie single mom na matumizi ya binadamu ni haki yangu ya msingi circumstance tu imeniweka hapa nilipo. LOL Sijui wanataka tuwabake!!

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

Kijana wa miaka 30 akadate mdada wa miaka 29 mwenye mtoto wa miaka 3, makuzi yenu ya Mwaka 1947 yanasemaje????

Na Moms wa sikuhizi wapo mpaka wa 14 years!

 

[Kimey]

Aksante Da Mkubwa nilijificha kidogo kuibuka nakutana na hizi habari loh.............haya ngoja nijiandae nami niunge foleni yako maana mie single mom na matumizi ya binadamu ni haki yangu ya msingi circumstance tu imeniweka hapa nilipo. LOL Sijui wanataka tuwabake!!

Mjukuu umesemaje? eeh!! Babu yako sijakufundisha kubaka.
Dark City single moms needs love too..

 

[Kaunga]

Aksante Da Mkubwa nilijificha kidogo kuibuka nakutana na hizi habari loh.............haya ngoja nijiandae nami niunge foleni yako maana mie single mom na matumizi ya binadamu ni haki yangu ya msingi circumstance tu imeniweka hapa nilipo. LOL Sijui wanataka tuwabake!!

Umeona eeh; mara tunaambiwa tuko vulnerable as if tunapick tu kila kinachosimamisha. LOL

 

[sun wu]

Kumbuka wengi wa wanaodate hawa single mothers ,sio watu ambao wamefuata utaratibu rasmi.wengi wa hawa ni mahawara wako for their interest.Sasa hawara hawa wanaweza fundisha maadili gani?wengi wao pia wanaweza kuwa na umri mdogo kuliko watoto wa huyo wanaye date nae?watoto wa huyo mama wanakuwa kwenye position ipi?

Wengi sio wote mkuu.., alafu kama sijakosea ma-hawara wengi huwa hawapendi responsibility kabisa, kwahio ni vigumu kuingilia issue za watoto, pia itakuwa unakosea sana kumshutumu huyu mleta uzi kwamba na yeye ni kati ya hao wengi wenye interest zao

jiweke kwenye position ya hao watoto halafu jiulize wewe huwa unakua na hali gani,pindi jitu ambalo sio babako,unajua linamchakachua mama yako,halafu linataka kujua maisha ya familia yenu yanaendaje.Sio kitu rahisi kama kinavyochukuliwa.

Duh unavyoiweka hii ni ki-negative sana mkuu na wewe chukulia mama yako kaolewa upya au kapata mtu mwingine ambaye yupo tayari kuwa mlezi wako au part ya maisha yako na anakutakia mema na anakushauri kama mlezi na hataki upotee (sijasema kwamba ni rahisi) ila huoni wewe kama mtoto utakuwa selfish sana ukitaka maisha ya mama yako yasiendelee na wewe kuwa kikwazo na matatizo ndani ya nyumba ? (Yaani hata kama unavuta bangi usiambiwe sababu ni mambo ya familia yako ?, na huyo bwana akiwa part ya familia yenu bado tu hana cha kusema ?)

Mkuu kumbuka kila kiumbe ana-part yake ndani ya familia na ulimbukeni wa yoyote unaweza kufanya familia nzima ikawa kwenye matatizo