JF Chit-Chats
General Chat, Talk about anything that falls under no category on the board, but remember FOLLOW THE RULES!
Masai aliibiwa simu kwenye daladala, akaanza kutoa onyo kwa abiria:-
MASAI: Jamani alieiba simu yangu arudishe haraka kabla sijafanya kitu kama nilichofanya nilipoibiwa simu yakwanza...
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Formular of how to conserve toilet paper just use both side.
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Bwana mmoja na mkewe waliishi miaka mingi bila kupata mtoto. Walifanya kila waliloweza, hospitalini, waganga, washauri, lakini bila mafanikio. Hatimaye baada ya kushauriwa na mtu wao wa karibu...
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Kwa kuzingatia uhalisia kuwa harusi nyingi za siku hizi zinagharimu mamilion ya pesa kwa starehe ya siku 1 au 2 tu,
na kwakuwa serikali haina fedha na hvyo kuna haja ya kubuni vyanzo vipya vya...
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Mtoto anamuomba baba yake,naomba hiyo glass hapo juu,baba akajibu sitaki njoo mwenyewe
mtoto;si unichukulie mara moja tu,baba akajibu ntakuja kukuchapa emb njoo mwenyewe,mtoto akajibu basi ukija...
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Kulitolewa tangazo: mtu akiwa na watoto 10, anapata zawadi ya gari na nyumba, jamaa mmoja akamwambia mkewe sisi tuna watoto wa wanane (8), nisamehe ninao wengine wawili (2) nje ya ndoa naenda...
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Padri mmoja alikuwa amechoka kusalisha, sasa alichokifanya akachukua redio halaf akajirekod hvyo ukifika mda wa sala anasimama halaf anafungulia radio, cku 1 akaisahau ile kanda nyumbani akamtuma...
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A rasta man walks into a bank and hands the cashier a bag full of weed. The cashier angrily asks 'Sir, what is this?' The rasta replies, 'Why yoh guan ask foolish queshuns man? Mi com fi open a...
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Attention please.....!
Don't drink unboiled water....
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Because...
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Fish live in water without pampers...!
Seriously...
Good Friday
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Wao wanachekelea wakati mwenzao bajeti imeharibika...
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In a K/KOO mat,an elderly lady complaining about the music..Wekeni nyimbo za yesu'
Conductor: Mather,Yesu bado hajatoa album.......
Passenger: Kuna Kiti?
Conda:hao wengine wamekalia ndoo lakini...
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Umeadimika kama msele wa treni.
umeadimika kama milanngo ya tractor.
Umeadimika kama honi ya ndege.
Umeadimika kama thead ya mod
,,,,,hebu ongezea *yako hapo!
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Mgonjwa kaingia kwa doctor, doctor mi naumwa lakini nikikueleza utacheka, doctor akamjibu siipo hapa kucheka wagonjwa, kweli doctor hutacheka!!
doctor akamjibu kama huumwi pisha wengine, jamaa...
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Bibi 1 kachoshwa na tabia za mume wake,siku moja kwa ghadhabu akasema bora
ningeolewa na iblisi kuliko wewe
mumewe akamjibu dini hairuhusu m2 kuolewa na kaka yake
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Hayawi hayawi sasa yamekuwa. Hatimaye mbunge machachari wa kutoka Kigoma, muheshimiwa Zitto Zuberi Kabwe ameamua kubadilisha dini yake kutoka kwenye uislamu kuelekea kwenye ukatoliki.
Vyanzo vya...
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A 7years girl asked her sciece teacher;
girl;..Teacher can my mother get pregnancy?
Teacher;.How old she is?
Girl;40 years old!
Teacher:.She probably can.
Girl:..What about my sister...
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After having failed his exam in "Logistics and Organization", Kim goes and confronts his lecturer about it.
Kim: Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?
Professor: Surely I...
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Sijui hata hii tabia wameiga wapi. utasikia shikamoo kaka...naomba shilling mia. Mwingine utasikia shikamoo kaka naomba uninunulie chips mayai. Mwingine tena shikamoo kaka naomba uninunulie soda...
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Leo kwenye mazishi ya mke wa mwenyekiti wa UVCCM wilaya ya Arusha mjini God Mwalusamba, kijana Waziri Mbeyu dereva wa familia ya rais kikwete, ametoa salam za rambirambi kwa niaba ya Rais na...
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