Unafanyaje mpenzi wako aki'FLIRT'?

[Dark City]

Babu nikujulishe tuu kuwa kuna "rules" mpya za kuhashua katika dunia ya sasa. Nitaelezea tuu rules mpya za upande kiume. Akina Gaijin na Kongosho wataelezea za upande wa kike.

Kwa kifupi sheria zimebadilika ili kwenda fasta na "politically correct" ya "wild and woolly dating" ya dunia ya leo. Unaweza kumsifia mfanyakazi mwenzako kuhusiana na nguo aliyovaa, macho yake, alivyoumbika kwa nyuma? Wakati unamsifia unaweza kumgusa kwa nyuma? Vipi kifuani kwake? Ni zipi hizo sheria mpya?

Kwanza kabisa kabla ya kwenda kwenye hizo rules mpya kuna preliminary issues need to ironed out. Kwanza, inabidi kutofautisha kati ya "creepers" na "flirt". Whilst creepers stalk you down, flirt "plays" with your mind to arouse your interests. Flirts are self-aware and know when they've crossed a line. Creepers are not aware or don't care about crossing the line. Babu enzi zenu kulikuwa na creepers?

Pili you have to play it very cool. Huwezi kumrukia bibi kizee na kusema "Wow! Umeumbika kwa nyuma! Can we blah blah?" Pia tofauti na zamani wanawake wa kizazi cha leo wana-drive na wanapiga kura pia. Kwa hiyo, kuwa makini sana unapovuka barabara. Hakikisha green light za kuvukia ziko on.

Tena tofauti na zamani ambako hata hukukuwa na green lights, siku hizi zimewekwa wazi kabisa. Ugongwe mwenyewe. Pia ukitaka kupigiwa kura ya ushindi achana na uhashuo wa majukwaani. Uhashuo wa one to one ndiyo mpango wa kileo. Twende kwenye rules.

Rule namba moja, tumia strengths (siyo weaknesses) za mwanamke against her. Kama akisema ana boyfriend, mwambie wewe ndiyo boyfriend wake. Kama akisema ameolewa na akikuonyesha pete yake, itoe pete kwenye kidogo, ivalishe kwenye kidogo chako, halafu mwulize nani sasa ameoa? (huko ukiflash kidole chako chenye hiyo pete). Kama una kidole kikubwa mno, I am afraid, wahusika will have consider amending the new rules. lol.

Kama akisema kuwa uache kuwa "creep", mwimbie verses zote za wimbo wa TLC unaoitwa "Creep". Babu mpaka hapo, naona hii rule mpya inaweza kukushinda. lol. Kama akisema ataita polisi mwambie, wewe mwenyewe ni polisi na kuwa yuko under arrest, kwa kuwa too sexy. Ila hii ya under polise arrest nasikia wadau wanataka kuifanyia mabadiliko iwe "umetekwa na nakupeleka kwenye ule msitu wa….." Still debate kwa wadau kama hiyo amendment inafaa.

Kwa hiyo babu nasikia zamani mlikuwa mna-approach mwanamke kwa kuangalia their weaknesses halafu mnazichakachua na kuwa strengths. Vijana wa kileo wana-attack kwa kutumia strengths za mlengwa. Kamwe usimvike mwanamke strength ambayo hana. Kila mwanamke ana strength Fulani. Take your time to look for it and use it effectively.

Rule namba mbili, keep it simple. Forget about the pick up lines. Msalimie tuu kawaida, mwulize jina lake (of course utakuwa tayari unajua jina lake). How does it feel to have her in the palm of your hand? Good I bet.

Rule namba tatu, what do you share in common with the woman? Hutajua unless umwulize. Anapenda ngono? Hey, nauliza tuu. Lol. Aina gain ya ngono? Babu tofauti na zamani siku hizi kuna aina nyingi za ngono. So, the more specific she is the better, usije ukakuta anapenda ambazo hupendi halafu mkashindwa kuhashuana.

Wanawake wa sasa siyo wale wa wakati wenu Babu, na wengi hawataogopa kukuambia aina za ngono wanazopenda. We are talking about women emancipation here. It is everywhere mpaka kwenye ngono.

Rule namba nne, changanua intensity ya uhashuo wako uendane na intensity ya mwanamke. Dunia ya leo wanawake wanatofautiana sana. Ni mwanamke mwenye aibu kwa nje lakini kwa ndani ni chui kwenye sita kwa sita? Mwulize mapema kabisa if this is the case. Ni "party girl" ambaye anaonekana mtu ambaye mnaweza kulewa wote na kusahau anakupenda au kukuchukia kiasi gani? Tafuta majibu ya haya maswali toka kwake directly.

Ni mwanamke ambaye anaweza tuu kuwa amebeba tochi ya "free love" kama ilivyokuwa inafanyika kwenye "orgies" enzi zenu Babu? Hutajua unless umwulize. Uliza, uliza, uliza na uliza tena kuhusiana fantansies zake za kimapenzi na uwezekano wa yeye kuzitimiza na wewe. Hii itakusaida ku-draw a line mapema kabisa. Always kumbuka kutabasamu.

Rule namba tano, kumbuka kucheza na scenarios za kuhashua kichwani mwako kabla ya kutumia kwa mwanamke in real life. Hii itakusaidia kujiandaa. Kwa mfano, umemwa approach mwanamke na kumwambia in a flirting way, "Wanna f**k?" halafu akajibu "HELL NO" au akakupa jibu baya zaidi (unajua uswahilini kwetu tena). Utafanya nini? Kama unajua niambie.

Rule number sita, always keep youself updated na codes zinazotumika kwenye uhashuo wa kileo.

Rule namba saba, hii ni rule ya enzi zenu babu. Bado relevant kwa kizazi cha sasa. The rule is wanawake wanapenda sana dolphins. Natumaini unailewa hii rule.

Mwisho niongezee tuu kuwa with the fast changes in the flirting industry, hizi zinaweza kuwa outdated by kesho au kesho kutwa. So, keep youself updated. Kuwa close na wajukuu zako.

Asante sana Mkuu EMT,

Unfortunately, huyu mwanafunzi kafeli mtihani...hapa nakiri, nimeweka mpira kwapani...

Kila la heri akina Kongosho...kama hutakwenda kwenye useja lakini!

Babu DC!!

 

[snowhite]

Tatizo la flirting linaanzia kwenye experience
mtu kama amewahi sex na watu alio flirt nao
ataamini vipi its safe kwa mkewe/mumewe??????

see!
kwa mwendo wa hii thread nahisi leo nisitoe offer manake lol!
ah ngumu bana!basi ile milkshake itakuwa served na kente cloth usawa wa ......... !ngoja EMT anione!

 

[Asprin]

Kuanzia Brajec?

Heheheheeh!

Na wewe Brajec si ulisepa na charminglady?

Yaani ilikuwa ni full mapoudaaa..... cacico Vs Mtambuzi, Nicas Mtei vs charminglady, Madame B vs Masimu kibaaaao.

Ni mimi tu nilibakia, ni mimi tu kuwaleteeni habari.

 

[Allien]

uzi umeenda sana huu!lakini siwezi kuacha japo kutia neno!maana nami doh!nina mijituhuma kibao humu katika hili
Sijui pengine niko tofauti au sijui maana sahihi ya hii!
mi naflirt sana na watu sana mno!iwe ofisini au humu!lakini naflirt sana pia na mume wangu!
ni aina flani ya mawasiliano niliyonayo na watu walio karibu yangu!labda pengine ndo mana haijawahi kunikuta nikawa mhanga!
katika kumbukumbu zangu sijawahi kutokewa na mtu niliyewahi kuflirt nae!(sijasema ndo muanze sasa)
ila i find it normal na ni aina yangu ya kutafsiri kuwa niko karibu na huyo mtu!
sijui pengine niko sawa au siko sawa?mwenzi wangu pia hujua kuwa naflirt na believe me hatujawahi kuingia kwenye mgogoro wa aina yoyote kwa sababu ya aina ya mawasiliano nafanya na marafiki zangu hasa humu JF.
well kwa upande wangu post huishia pale ninapomaliza kuandika na kusoma!na maisha yanaendelea !
The Boss kuja hapa milkshake na threesome inaweza kuzua balaa ujue!
Boflo wapi wewe bana mimi love u ujue
Kaizer mwal anajiandaa kuingia darasani umeshaandaa peni na daftari,leo kuna ile topic yetu ya cross multiplication
Asprin kom and do ze nidful mwalimu anahitaji wa kufuta ubao please!
Allien ile date yetu iko pale pale!i hope umeshapata ile dress code tuliyokubaliana
jouneGwalu leo ntakuwa shift mpaka ya usiku for u!usiniangushe please!
platozoom ile album nimekutumia ujue ndo mpango mzima ,are yu ready?
SASA KAMA HII YOTE NI CHEATING mbona ntakuwa na balaa mie!lol

Barafu-Nyeupe huishi vituko wewe.

Ila hiyo kitu ya The Boss sijui mmh . . . kama vipi mnifafanulie . . .

 

[Catherine]

Ndio maana mie siflirt na wala sijui kuflirt.

Tukesheni tukiomba.

ya kweli hayo babu??? dah, mie flirting ipo kwenye damu.... sijui ntaachaje haya makitu.

 

[snowhite]

Barafu-Nyeupe huishi vituko wewe.

Ila hiyo kitu ya The Boss sijui mmh . . . kama vipi mnifafanulie . . .

ahahahahhahhahhahhahha mi nami utaniweza lol!
by the way that date is my treat sawa!
hii kitu ya The Boss ngoja tumwite 3sumer mwenzetu Kaunga ye ndo atakufafanulia vizuri!

 

[Asprin]

Dr leo umeongea kitu muhimu and very relevant. Hebu chukulia situation hii, uhusiano umepungua mvuto kwa sababu mbalimbali, na mwenza hataki kuflirt na mwenzawe.
1. Lakini yuko busy tu na mambo yake mengine. Wakati mwingine hata ukitumiwa msg you are too busy kujibu, or else unajibu ok, au sawa! Ni mbaya kuwa in a boring relationship.

2. Mwenza hata akiwepo nyumbani yuko busy na mambo yake, hata kuongea hataki. Kuna mtu hana hata nafasi ya kuongea na familia, akiwepo kama hayupo.

3. Hii kina Asprin watabisha, ila unakaa na mashosti hukoo bar na umemtelekeza bibi home alone. Shukuru Mungu kama hana maujanja ya nokia asha aisee, lazma awekwe busy. Ili walau ukitokea saa sita za usiku mwenzio keshakupunguzia kazi ya maandalizi. Bila hivyo kila siku utakuta kavuta mdomo na ndo inakuwa vile tena.

Kama Kongosho, mie nikikukuta unaflirt lazma niflirt kukupiku,lol. Ila flirting is a new way of not cheating all the way. Na ukimkuta mwenza anaflirt haijustify kuachana (kama ni ndoa). Ila sasa kununa na kujidai mkali haisaidii. Kama uko interested swallow it, anza kuflirt nae ili umuweke busy. Ukitumiwa msg lunch njema darling, does it take a century kusema thanks sweetie, as compared to ok? Au poa? If you dont make your lady feel beautiful, someone else will aisee.

We mtoto mahanatha kweli wallah

Ndio nini sasa unataka kutoa siri za matumizi ya nokia Asha hapa?

Ila hapo kwa red kuna kaukweli asee..... nisipojirekebisha wakware watanimegea kabikira bibi yenu....

Sipendi kuwasokomezea watu vitu vyenye ncha kali utosini mchana kweupe......

 

[Asprin]

uzi umeenda sana huu!lakini siwezi kuacha japo kutia neno!maana nami doh!nina mijituhuma kibao humu katika hili
Sijui pengine niko tofauti au sijui maana sahihi ya hii!
mi naflirt sana na watu sana mno!iwe ofisini au humu!lakini naflirt sana pia na mume wangu!
ni aina flani ya mawasiliano niliyonayo na watu walio karibu yangu!labda pengine ndo mana haijawahi kunikuta nikawa mhanga!
katika kumbukumbu zangu sijawahi kutokewa na mtu niliyewahi kuflirt nae!(sijasema ndo muanze sasa)
ila i find it normal na ni aina yangu ya kutafsiri kuwa niko karibu na huyo mtu!
sijui pengine niko sawa au siko sawa?mwenzi wangu pia hujua kuwa naflirt na believe me hatujawahi kuingia kwenye mgogoro wa aina yoyote kwa sababu ya aina ya mawasiliano nafanya na marafiki zangu hasa humu JF.
well kwa upande wangu post huishia pale ninapomaliza kuandika na kusoma!na maisha yanaendelea !
The Boss kuja hapa milkshake na threesome inaweza kuzua balaa ujue!
Boflo wapi wewe bana mimi love u ujue
Kaizer mwal anajiandaa kuingia darasani umeshaandaa peni na daftari,leo kuna ile topic yetu ya cross multiplication
Asprin kom and do ze nidful mwalimu anahitaji wa kufuta ubao please!
Allien ile date yetu iko pale pale!i hope umeshapata ile dress code tuliyokubaliana
jouneGwalu leo ntakuwa shift mpaka ya usiku for u!usiniangushe please!
platozoom ile album nimekutumia ujue ndo mpango mzima ,are yu ready?
SASA KAMA HII YOTE NI CHEATING mbona ntakuwa na balaa mie!lol

Oh Mamma!

Hapa naona wamependelewa wawili tu asee.......... Veeeery unfair!!

 

[snowhite]

Oh Mamma!

Hapa naona wamependelewa wawili tu asee.......... Veeeery unfair!!

usijaaaali!
we wajua jinsi ulivyo mwanafunzi niliyependezwa naye!TULIA!keep it low,i'll join yu with the flow!s'awaaaaaa?

 

[Asprin]

usijaaaali!
we wajua jinsi ulivyo mwanafunzi niliyependezwa naye!TULIA!keep it low,i'll join yu with the flow!s'awaaaaaa?

Oh mamma........... Sijabugi meeen!!

Afu eti mwalimu snowhite, waeza niambia kwanini huu uzi wa Riwa unasomwa sana na watu walio gesht haush??? Ina maana members wengi ni wahanga wa Flirtings au?

There are currently 417 users browsing this thread. (27 members and 390 guests)

• Asprin,
• Kaizer+,
• jouneGwalu,
• Sir_Finus,
• bigboi,
• mwaride,
• introvert,
• IFAKI,
• Safhat,
• Ahmad Mtumbi,
• basat,
• Lasikoki,
• mwila,
• pamt,
• Shekispia,
• Ennie,
• smallvile,
• HIPPO,
• Mbimbinho,
• Chonya,
• Mtimba,
• mtoto matataa,
• EARPHONE,
• mpogole,
• Shinto,
• tAi,
• Dina

 

[snowhite]

Oh mamma........... Sijabugi meeen!!

Afu eti mwalimu snowhite, waeza niambia kwanini huu uzi wa Riwa unasomwa sana na watu walio gesht haush??? Ina maana members wengi ni wahanga wa Flirtings au?

There are currently 417 users browsing this thread. (27 members and 390 guests)

• Asprin,
• Kaizer+,
• jouneGwalu,
• Sir_Finus,
• bigboi,
• mwaride,
• introvert,
• IFAKI,
• Safhat,
• Ahmad Mtumbi,
• basat,
• Lasikoki,
• mwila,
• pamt,
• Shekispia,
• Ennie,
• smallvile,
• HIPPO,
• Mbimbinho,
• Chonya,
• Mtimba,
• mtoto matataa,
• EARPHONE,
• mpogole,
• Shinto,
• tAi,
• Dina

ahahhaahhahahhhahah watu wanaogopa vivuli vyao mwanafunzi wangu!chezeya kuwa mhanga wa flirting jana yake af leo unakutana na sredi la aina hii! af Riwa mbona unataka kutuondolea maraha !ah!

 

[Asprin]

ahahhaahhahahhhahah watu wanaogopa vivuli vyao mwanafunzi wangu!chezeya kuwa mhanga wa flirting jana yake af leo unakutana na sredi la aina hii! af Riwa mbona unataka kutuondolea maraha !ah!

Afu mwalimu si umeonma eh? Wadau wa MMU wako watatu tu hapo. Wengine wote mamluki.

Conclusion: MMU na ChitChat members ni vigogo wa flirtings na wahanga wa matokeo ya flirtings.

Ni mimi tu nimebakia, ni mimi tu kuwatoleeni uvivu.

 

[The Boss]

see!
kwa mwendo wa hii thread nahisi leo nisitoe offer manake lol!
ah ngumu bana!basi ile milkshake itakuwa served na kente cloth usawa wa ......... !ngoja EMT anione!

Hii thtread ilipaswa kuja baada ya milkshake treat with bikini lol
sasa nahisi kaniki inatafutwa lol

 

[snowhite]

Afu mwalimu si umeonma eh? Wadau wa MMU wako watatu tu hapo. Wengine wote mamluki.

Conclusion: MMU na ChitChat members ni vigogo wa flirtings na wahanga wa matokeo ya flirtings.

Ni mimi tu nimebakia, ni mimi tu kuwatoleeni uvivu.

af kweli bana !ahahahahhahahhahhahahah,lakini hamna bana !wamechangia sana mchana mi na we tulivokuwa darasani!hii page ya 13 sijui!

 

[snowhite]

Hii thtread ilipaswa kuja baada ya milkshake treat with bikini lol
sasa nahisi kaniki inatafutwa lol

ahahahahhahahhahahhahahha mi nilikwambia tuwahi!we oh subiri kwanza oh unajua haya mambo yanataka subra!sasa matokeo yake milkshake itakuwa served na kaniki sasa !ah!mi unaniuziga kweli sa nyingine

 

[Asprin]

af kweli bana !ahahahahhahahhahhahahah,lakini hamna bana !wamechangia sana mchana mi na we tulivokuwa darasani!hii page ya 13 sijui!

Afu mwalimu, huyu mwanafunzi wako Kaizer unamsemaje? Namwona anachungulia tu hapa......


There are currently 424 users browsing this thread. (29 members and 395 guests)

• Asprin,
• snowhite,
• Kaizer+,
• andybird314,
• gambagumu,
• CONTINUUM HYPOTHESIS,
• bigboi,
• mwaride,
• introvert,
• IFAKI,
• Safhat,
• Ahmad Mtumbi,
• basat,
• Lasikoki,
• mwila,
• pamt,
• Shekispia,
• smallvile,
• HIPPO,
• Mbimbinho,
• Chonya,
• Mtimba,
• mtoto matataa,
• EARPHONE,
• mpogole,
• Shinto,
• tAi,
• Dina

 

[snowhite]

Afu mwalimu, huyu mwanafunzi wako Kaizer unamsemaje? Namwona anachungulia tu hapa......


There are currently 424 users browsing this thread. (29 members and 395 guests)

• Asprin,
• snowhite,
• Kaizer+,
• andybird314,
• gambagumu,
• CONTINUUM HYPOTHESIS,
• bigboi,
• mwaride,
• introvert,
• IFAKI,
• Safhat,
• Ahmad Mtumbi,
• basat,
• Lasikoki,
• mwila,
• pamt,
• Shekispia,
• smallvile,
• HIPPO,
• Mbimbinho,
• Chonya,
• Mtimba,
• mtoto matataa,
• EARPHONE,
• mpogole,
• Shinto,
• tAi,
• Dina

ahahhaahhahahhahhahahhahha ako kiiimya anatunga sheria tu hapa

 

[Kaizer]

babu Dc leo niko tech & gadgets swtlo wangu Kaizer kaniambaie nisiingie kabisa huku hadi msimu wa sikukuu upite kisa nisije wazibua wengine maskio wakaanza kukaba za sikukuu kwa wakaka wa jf.

Ndo manake gfsonwin my swetlo. Wasitakenkuleta hashuo la boga kujifanya Zuri kumbe makai yake kwen majani

 

[Asprin]

ahahhaahhahahhahhahahhahha ako kiiimya anatunga sheria tu hapa

Au anaflirt na mwalimu mwenzio gfsonwin? Manake walimu wa siku hizi mmeshindikana (siyo wewe lakini, naogopa bakora za matakoni mie)

 

[Watu8]

Oh mamma........... Sijabugi meeen!!

Afu eti mwalimu snowhite, waeza niambia kwanini huu uzi wa Riwa unasomwa sana na watu walio gesht haush??? Ina maana members wengi ni wahanga wa Flirtings au?

There are currently 417 users browsing this thread. (27 members and 390 guests)

• Asprin,
• Kaizer+,
• jouneGwalu,
• Sir_Finus,
• bigboi,
• mwaride,
• introvert,
• IFAKI,
• Safhat,
• Ahmad Mtumbi,
• basat,
• Lasikoki,
• mwila,
• pamt,
• Shekispia,
• Ennie,
• smallvile,
• HIPPO,
• Mbimbinho,
• Chonya,
• Mtimba,
• mtoto matataa,
• EARPHONE,
• mpogole,
• Shinto,
• tAi,
• Dina

niongeze na mimi nimerudi...