JF Chit-Chats
General Chat, Talk about anything that falls under no category on the board, but remember FOLLOW THE RULES!
Basi wakati mmoja panya katika pitapita zake mwituni alimkanyaga nyoka kwa bahati mbaya.Ikabidi panya aombe msamaha na kumwambia nyoka pole.nyoka akamjibu pole ya nini? Hebu kione.kitoto kidogo...
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Siku moja NYANI na MJUSI walikuwa juu ya mti wanavuta banghi.Mara MJUSI akajisikia kiu,akaamua kwenda kunywa maji kwenye mto wa karibu.Alipofika huko mtoni,MJUSI aliuawa na MAMBA.Yule MAMBA...
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A lady boards a bus carrying her baby, she sits next to a man and then starts to breastfeed the baby. The baby refuses to suckle, she yells at the baby " ebu nyonya ama nimpatie huyu uncle ako...
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Ivi wallet in ya nini hasa zaidi ya kuringishie kuwa una bunda la hela?
Wakuu kama kukosa wanawake bora nikose,,kitu wallet sikipendi katika maisha yangu.
Mbona laki hata 2 zinakaa kwenye mfuko...
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An eighteen-year-old girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for two months.
Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl...
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Muumini kaenda kwa padri kuungama dhambi zake,
Padri: Umefanya kosa gani mpaka umekuja hap kuungama
Kondoo: Nimekua nikichat meseji za matusi na wake za watu
Padri : Sauti ya chini kabisa...
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If the temperature this morning is 0 degree centigrade and the weather channel says,"it will be twice as hot tomorrow",what will the temperature be?
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Sorry 1st, its just a joke....
Sister alikaa uchi padri akamuuliza hiyo ni nini? Sis akajibu ni kaburi. Padri nae kwa makusudi akajikalisha uchi, sister akauliza hy nini, padri akajibu ni maiti...
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Ofisini tumepata kijana, kaja kuanza kazi.
Kwa kuogopa ukali wa foleni nikamwambia twende tukazuge sehemu kisha baadae tutaondoka.
Tukaenda kwenye bar iliyopo jirani na ofisi, mziki ulikuwa...
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Kama kweli wewe elimu yako sio ya kuuunga unga, ebu nisaidie swali hili.
Badili sentensi ifuatayo kwa kiingereza,
BABA mimi mtoto wako wa ngapi??
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Sijui kama ni wote tulikuwa na babu wenye vituko hivi..ila mi babu yangu alikuwa amewazidi wote..
Mzee Nyela aliitwa...
siku moja kasafiri kaenda Mombasa. kurudi akaja na chumvi ile ya mabonge...
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Mla mirungi mmoja baada ya kumaliza na handas kupanda alikwenda hoteli akaagiza supu, mhudumu akamletea yakawa hivi
Mla mirungi: Mhudumu samahani njoo.
Mhudumu: Ndio mzee.
Mla mirungi: Hebu onja...
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Little Johnny asks his mother how old she is. Her reply is, "Gentlemen don't ask ladies that question." Johnny then asks his mother how much she weighs. Again the mother's reply is, "Gentlemen...
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Mjinga mmoja alimwambia rafiki "unaonaje nikachukua likizo mwezi mmoja na wewe mwezi mmoja tukasafiri likizo miezi miwili?
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Mvuta bangi mmoja aliingia ofisi akauliza meneja yuko wapi? Akajibiwa general manager? Akasema hapana Luteni meneja washkaji.
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Habari jamani JF!
What does this say?
a- a bird in the bush.
b- a bird in the tree.
c- a bird in my bush.
d- a bird in the the bush.
e- a bush in the tree.
Haya wajuzi wa hii lugha....
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Katika kutaka kujua maendeleo ya afya za wagonjwa wa akili (vichaa) katika hospitali fulani daktali huangalia mienendo ya wagonjwa wale tu: yule anayeenenda vizuri huamini kwamba ana nafuu kubwa...
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Kuna bwana mmoja alikuwa hana ajira kwa muda mrefu licha ya kuwa alikuwa na elimu ya chuo kikuu.
Ili maisha yaendelee ilibidi ajishikize kwenye ajira ya udereva wa taxi.
Bahati nzuri kulikuwa na...
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A new firefighter was being trained by an old fire chief.
"How would you react if a sudden fire flared up on the front of the building?" asked the...
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