JF Chit-Chats
General Chat, Talk about anything that falls under no category on the board, but remember FOLLOW THE RULES!
Mtoto mdogo msichana alimwuliza mama yake:
"Mama, asili ya binadamu ilianza vipi?"
Mama akajibu,
"Mungu aliumba Adam na Hawa, baadaye wao wakawa wanazaa watoto mpaka tukafikia sisi binadamu wa...
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A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different
hell for each country. He decides hell pick the least painful to spend
his eternity. He goes to German Hell and...
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Baada ya kulewa njwiii na rafiki yake mpya aliempata bar, mlevi akamkaribisha rafiki mpya apaone kwake. Walipofika mwenyeji akaanza intro,'Unaona makochi yale, yale yangu, hiyo TV yangu, njoo...
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nyie ni matakataka mliodanganya wapiga kura maskini!ovyoo,mnafikiri huo mshahara utawapeleka wapi?????????????
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They said;
Whiskey, Vodka, Beer, Cigarettes, women, money, etc etc...are a man's worst enemies,
and the man who runs away from his enemies is a COWARD!
Walisema;
Pombe, bia, sigara, wanawake...
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Jamaa kakamatwa barabarani na trafic kazidisha speed
DEREVA:Kunatatizo lolote mkuu?
POLICE:Umezidisha speed mheshimiwa
DEREVA:Ehh! kumbe
POLICE:Naomba leseni yako
DEREVA:Ningekuwanayo...
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Sista do mmoja alikuwa anapenda sana maharage ya kopo(baked beans)shida ilikuwa kila akiyala baada ya muda anaharibu atmosphere vibaya mno.Sasa ikafika point kapata mchumba aliyempenda sana na...
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One afternoon a husband arrived home with sad news for his wife
Husband: Wife, I just received a call, mother(mama) passed away. Shall we go to town and get some necessities for the funeral...
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A young girl is taking a bath, when she suddenly realizes shesgrowing pubic hairs.
She runs to her mom and says. "Mama I have hair growing on mycookie!!!
Her mother tells her not to call it...
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kuna mwizi baada ya kuiba sana jirani na kwao akaona asogee kidogo sehemu ingine,usiku akaenda kwenye nyumba moja yenye ukuta akaona kimya,ukuta haukuwa mrefu sana akaona aruke juu na kushika mara...
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Man: Darling, years ago you had a figure like a Coke bottle.
Wife: Yes darling I still do, only difference is that, earlier it was a 300ml now it's a 2 liters.
300ml
2 liters.
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jamaa moja alikua anatoa ushuhuda kanisani akasema hivi:shetani amenitesa kiseng....,sasa niko na yesu sitaki mambo ya kikum...tena!
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http://www.facebook.com/update_security_info.php?wizard=1#!/photo.php?fbid=247853678562885&set=a.159755060706081.41361.100000147638557&type=1&theater
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Anayevaa kanga ya mamako asubuhi wakati wa kwenda kuoga ndo baba yako huyooo,mkubali tuuu,pole sana mtani wangu(simba)^-1=paka shume.
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Mungu akubariki na akuangazie maisha bora na mafanikio mazuri kwa kila jambo unalofanya...
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Hii ingefaa kubaki kwenye jukwaa la siasa kwa ajili ya wanasiasa wetu, lakini kwa kuwa ni utani, hapa pia itafaa, lakini badala ya kucheka, naomba utafakari:
Kuna mfalme mmoja aliamua kusafiri...
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One tourist from U.S.A. asked to villager from Kishmundu Moshi.
Tourist: Any great man born in this village?
Villager: No sir, only small babies!
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Jamani nataka kununua Xtrail, lakini watu wananiambia eti ni mabovu, nimemuuliza aliye niambia kuwa mabovu kuwa yana ubovu gani anasema hajui ubovu wake, ila ameambiwa kuwa sio imara.
Naomba...
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Watoto wapo hospitali,mtoto wa kwanza kamwona mwenzie analia ikawa kama hivi:-
MTOTO WA KWANZA:Unalia nini?
MTOTO WAPILI:Nimekuja kupima damu
MTOTO WA KWANZA:Ndio sababu unalia?
MTOTO WA...
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kila siku najiuliza kuhusu adam na hawa , katika vitabu vyote vya dini vinaeleza kuwa sisi sote ni wana wa adam lakini inakuaje sisi waafrika tu weusi,au baba yetu adam au mama yetu hawa mmoja...
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