A Letter From Butiama:
Presidents and their Assistants
G. Madaraka Nyerere
Sunday News; Sunday,April 08, 2007 @00:05
IN a novel whose leading character is the president of a powerful country, the president, caught in a crisis and feeling helpless to come up with a solution, realizes his predicament: the president is expected to have an answer to every problem, from the trivial to crises.
Ordinary citizens can sit on a problem while weighing alternative solutions. A president does not always have that luxury. We demand of him immediate solutions for issues affecting our livelihood.
When one of my friends was refused a trading licence by a corrupt official he asked me to use my family connections to grant him an audience with President Nyerere. I was still in my teen years then, and I did not want to disappoint my friend, but I hardly felt that the President was the ideal person to solve his problem.
I took him home and he made his request, but he left disappointed, without the satisfaction of witnessing the corrupt official trembling before the president. Later, Mwalimu Nyerere asked me where I got the unusual idea that he should handle my friend's case. I confessed that I did not think it was a good idea, but I recounted to him the dilemma I faced of preventing a friend's access to his leader, and I believe Mwalimu understood me.
With that experience, over the years I have gained both respect and pity for administrative assistants who constantly face the difficult and thankless task of filtering and deciding who gets to meet the boss and who does not. These assistants are at times some of the most hated people in the country, because it is suspected they have a preference for saying "no" when the boss said "yes."
Recently, I received again one of those unusual requests that only a president could resolve. And, as with the earlier request, it was from one of my friends.
He requested that, should the opportunity arise, I should ask the president to appoint him to an important government administrative position.
I was more than flattered to think that he considered that I could recommend anyone for such an important responsibility. But that was the only positive attitude I had about his request. Because I knew him for many years, I did not believe he had the experience to even dare ask for such an important position. I knew he had some experience as an accountant, but I doubted whether those skills were suited for the presidential appointment.
Besides, it appeared to me that the position he was asking for necessitated constant human contact and demanded excellent humanhandling abilities. I asked myself a few questions.
When did accountants ever spend a time trying to resolve conflicts between pastoralists and farmers? When did accountants convene meetings to discuss the deteriorating security situation in a district? Since independence, how many accountants have made introductory remarks before an address by the president of the United Republic of Tanzania at a public meeting? Each answer I came up with convinced me that my friend had no business thinking he possessed the necessary skills and experience.
If for any reason I found him suitable for the job and an opportunity arose, how would I go about it? "Mr President, I have a friend, with experience in accounting, and he worked as an administrative assistant for a woodworking and furniture workshop. He currently runs a printing business and was wondering whether you could shortlist his name for the post of…."
Presidents and their Assistants I also thought he took our friendship for granted. You do not ask for a presidential appointment through a text message, which is what he did. I had no way of helping him, but I still thought he should have called me to ask for such an important favour.
Although he made such an unusual request I understood his motive, even though it made little sense.
We have a common friend who holds a similar position and so I reasoned he assumed that if our friend has managed, he also can. In my reaction I tried, as much as possible, to apply the skills of a presidential assistant. I replied, by a short text message, and told him that I thought that the post he wanted had already been filled, that I heard that the president was in the process of announcing those appointments soon. Privately, I concluded to myself, he had made one of the most idiotic requests that I had received for years.
I also suspected that my friend probably was drunk when he sent me the message, because I received it at four in the morning. Later that day, I realized what had happened. It was the first day of April. I had become, unwittingly, the perfect April fool.
madarakanyerere@yahoo.com