Priest: What is your sin child?
Girl : I confess father, I called a man a son-of-a-bitch...
Priest: Why?
Girl : Father he touched me....
Priest: Like this????
(The priest then touches the...
Kuna profesa mmoja pale Mlimani, alikuwa baada ya kumaliza lecture, anaongozana na wanafunzi kuelekea lunch kwa mama ntilie. Sasa nasikia wanaitwa mama lishe.
Akifika huko, mama ntilie...
Padre kawauliza waumini:
PADRE: Ni kiungo gani cha mwili hupatikana katika sehemu iliyojificha na kina wingi wa unyevunyevu kinaweza kufanya ndoa iwe IMARA sana au KUYUMBA?
WAUMINI: Kimya huku...
Mulokozi (Mhaya) kamaliza degree ya sheria UD, sasa karudi Bukoba
akaanzisha kijiofisi chake.
Shughuli ikaanza hivi, kakaa kwa muda mrefu bila ya kupata customer
kama zali vile, siku moja...
Jamani mi naomba watu kama wanaanzisha vitu/Starehe hapa Dar wawe wabunifu na kufikiria wakifanyacho, Talking about the Khanga moja thing, Jamani hao wanawake ni vumbi, wachafu, wanakalisha watu...
Katika kusafiri ndani ya ndege padre mmoja alimkaribisha sheikh chakula.Ndipo Sheikh kamuuliza ni chakula gani.Padre kajibu ni sausage iliotengenezwa kwa nyama ya nguruwe.Sheikh kamjibu sisi...
A Russian woman married a Canadian gentleman and they lived happily ever after in Toronto . The poor lady was not very proficient in English, but did manage to communicate with her husband. The...
Wanaume wote raia wa kigeni watakaotaka kuwaoa wanawake wa nchini Tajikistan watalazimika kuzifungua waleti zao na kuwanunulia nyumba wake zao kabla ya ndoa kwa mujibu wa sheria mpya iliyopitishwa...
Mwanamke mmoja wa nchini Italia amefungua kesi ya madai ya talaka mahakamani mwezi mmoja baada ya kuolewa kutokana na kitendo cha mumewe kumleta mama yake kwenye fungate (honeymoon) ya harusi yao...
electronic woman.......
~ Hard Disk Woman: She remembers everything. FOREVER.
~ RAM Woman: She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off.
~ Windows Woman: Everyone knows that she...
7 qualities to be a perfect woman:
B - Beautiful,
R - Responsible,
E - Energetic,
A - Adorable,
S - Sweet,
T - Truthful
S - Self-Organised
In short, she must have good B.R.E.A.S.T.S
Jamaa mmoja alikata tiketi ya bahati nasibu na akawa anasubiri siku ya mchezo ifike ili ajue kama atapata milioni mia. Mkewe akamuuliza.
"Mume wangu utaendelea kunipenda hivi hata kama...
"Baba nataka kuoa"
"Huwezi kuoa sasa mwanangu, wewe bado mdogo, lazima ukue na kupata mwanamke unayempenda."
"Nimeshampata baba"
"Umempata! Nani?"
"Bibi"
"Bibi yako ni mama yangu...
Man went to a pub with his wife. When he left for the counter a prostitute approached his wife & whispered "DEMAND CASH B4 SEX," he doesn't PAY!
The wife gets angry and starts shouting at the...
Edson kaenda kwa daktari, lakini kabla ya kutibiwa akamwambia dokta.
"Nina tatizo, lakini naomba kabla hujanitibu uniahidi kitu kimoja"
"Kitu gani Edson?"
"Kwamba hautanicheka."
"Kwa maadili...
Kuna familia moja ambayo baba na mama wote wako busy sana na majukumu yao kwa hiyo wakitoka huwa housegirl anaenda kusafisha chumbani na kuweka mambo safi kila mahala. Sasa kuna siku moja baba...
Wife is like a TV,
Girlfriend is like a MOBILE.
At home u watch TV,
But when u go out u take ur MOBILE.
Sometimes u enjoy TV,
But most of the time u play with ur MOBILE.
TV is free for life...