In the interest of full disclosure, mimi sijui chochote kile cha ziada kuhusu hili sakata la vyeti vya mkuu wa mkoa wa Dar zaidi ya hiki ninachokisoma kwenye mitandao ya kijamii na vyombo vinginevyo vya habari.
Lakini nikiwa mtu mwenye akili zangu timamu [well, naamini wapo wataobisha kuwa nina akili timamu, it's all good] nina maswali mepesi sana lakini ambayo naona kama vile hayana majibu kamili ya kueleweka.
Nimeshahoji juu ya uwezekano wa Makonda kufunguliwa mashitaka kwa manufaa ya umma. Hilo nimesikia kuna mtu au watu wanaolifanyia kazi.
Gwajima na Makonda wao naona wamegoma kabisa kutuonyesha vyeti walivyo navyo. Oh well...fine.
Sasa nije kwa huyo Paul Makonda halisi. Yaani Paul Makonda mwenyewe aliyeibiwa au aliyeuza [allegedly] huo utambulisho wake kwa Daudi Bashite.
Yeye huyo mtu yuko wapi?
Sasa hivi anatumia jina gani?
Anafanya shughuli gani?
Hivi huyo mtu hana ndugu, jamaa, na marafiki ambao wanaweza kutupa walau usuli [background] kidogo wa huyo mtu?
Naamini huyo Paul Makonda halisi haishi kwenye ombwe. Naamini anaishi miongoni mwa jamii.
Sasa kweli hao watu anaoishi nao na kukutana nao hakuna hata mmoja wao aliyejitokeza mpaka hivi sasa kusema lolote?
I'm getting so sick of this bullshit.
So will the real Paul Makonda please stand up...?
I repeat, will the real Paul Makonda please stand up...?
May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Paul Makonda please stand up?
I repeat will the real Paul Makonda please stand up?
We're going to have a problem here
Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam and Tommy just burst in the door
Started whoopin' her ass worse than before, they first get divorced
Throwing her over furniture
It's the return of the "Oh wait, no way, your kidding,
He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
And Rev Gwajima said
Nothing you idiots Rev Gwajima's dead, he's locked in my basement (ha ha)
Feminist women love Makonda, chicka chicka chicka Paul Makonda I'm sick of him
Look at him, walking around grabbing his you know what
Flippin' the you know who "yeah, but he's so cute though"
Yea I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse than what's going on in your parent's bedrooms
Sometimes I want to get on TV and just let loose, but can't,
But it's cool for Freeman Mbowe to hump a dead moose
My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips
And if I'm lucky you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a women's clitoris is.
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is, by the time they hit 4th grade,
They got the discovery channel don't they?
We ain't nothing but mammals,
Well some of us cannibals, who cut other people open like cantaloupes.
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel I got the antidote.
Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes
I'm Paul Makonda, yes I'm the real Makonda
All you other Paul Makondas are just imitating
So won't the real Paul Makonda, please stand up,
Please stand up,
Please stand up
'Cause I'm Paul Makonda, yes I'm the real Makonda
All you other Paul Makondas are just imitating
So won't the real Paul Makonda, please stand up,
Please stand up,
Please stand up
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups all you do is annoy me
So I've been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me, who just don't give a *** like me, who dress like me
Walk, talk and act like me, it just might be the next best thing,
But not quite me
I'm like a head trip to listen to
'Cause I'm only giving you, things you joke about with your friends
Inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of y'all drug dealers
And I don't gotta be false or sugar coat it at all
I just get on the mic and spit it, and whether you like to admit it (rip)
I just shit it better than 90 percent of you all politicians out there
So will the real Makonda, please stand up
And put one of those fingers on each hand up
And to be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
I'm paul Makonda, yes I'm the Paul Makonda
All you other Paul Makondas are just imitating
, yes I'm the real Makonda
All you other Paul Makondas are just imitating