Chris_A
New Member
- Jun 23, 2026
- 1
- 6
My mind is in a mess right now, I think it's because there's a certain kind of clarity that I've been searching for but I just can't seem to find it.
1. Nimejaribu kuitafuta through achievements of different milestones ila still sijaipata.
2. Nimejaribu kuitafuta through self improvement habits ila still sijaipata. (reading books, reading the bible, working out, meditating and journaling)
Nilivyokua Sekondary, i used to think through graduating and passing that milestone nitaingia chuo and all will be well in a sense kwamba vitu vilivyokua vina nisumbua akili vitaondoka na ill be free and at peace at last. Lakini hapana.
Nimeingia chuo vitu vipya vikawa vinanisumbua akili, nikajiambia ya kwamba all will be well once i graduate and maybe through passing this new milestone, maybe then ill find freedom and clarity.
Ila hapana,
Nimemaliza chuo, vitu vipya vinanichosha akili. Nimejishtukia nipo kwenye loop ya kusema maybe nikipata tu kazi, all will be well.....ila nishaona uongo huo.
The sad part about all of the above ni kwamba, through that journey of finding clarity nimetumia weed, pombe and i was a womanizer/ player..........nilikua nikifanya yote hayo hoping nitapata the satisfaction and clarity am looking for, ila sijapata.
Najua kua kuna tragedies kubwa sana watu wanazopitia katika haya maisha, ila still that doesnt take away the curiosity of me asking.
What am i missing? kuna mtazamo wa maisha sioni au?
1. Nimejaribu kuitafuta through achievements of different milestones ila still sijaipata.
2. Nimejaribu kuitafuta through self improvement habits ila still sijaipata. (reading books, reading the bible, working out, meditating and journaling)
Nilivyokua Sekondary, i used to think through graduating and passing that milestone nitaingia chuo and all will be well in a sense kwamba vitu vilivyokua vina nisumbua akili vitaondoka na ill be free and at peace at last. Lakini hapana.
Nimeingia chuo vitu vipya vikawa vinanisumbua akili, nikajiambia ya kwamba all will be well once i graduate and maybe through passing this new milestone, maybe then ill find freedom and clarity.
Ila hapana,
Nimemaliza chuo, vitu vipya vinanichosha akili. Nimejishtukia nipo kwenye loop ya kusema maybe nikipata tu kazi, all will be well.....ila nishaona uongo huo.
The sad part about all of the above ni kwamba, through that journey of finding clarity nimetumia weed, pombe and i was a womanizer/ player..........nilikua nikifanya yote hayo hoping nitapata the satisfaction and clarity am looking for, ila sijapata.
Najua kua kuna tragedies kubwa sana watu wanazopitia katika haya maisha, ila still that doesnt take away the curiosity of me asking.
What am i missing? kuna mtazamo wa maisha sioni au?