Sababu za mke kumdharau Mume nyumbani

[Masikini_Jeuri]

Kingi acha tu yaani hadi nashawishika kutengeneza kastudy hapa halafu si unajua Tanzania study za social ni chache especially zihusuzo mahusiano ya wanandoa?

Hata elimu ya jamii imekuwa ikilizunguka suala la ndoa kama kitu cha kigeni!

Angalia ahata haya mafundisho kuhusiana na kujilinda na hatari za maambukizo ya ukimwi kimsingi naliona kundi la wanandoa kujumuishwa moja kawa moja halipati upendeleo wa halina forum yake pekee!

Tunahitaji hii elimu ya maisha ya ndoa sasa kuliko kitu chochote; naunga mkono mawazo yako MJ1

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

samahani wapendwa ninaomba niipost hii post kutoka kwa mdau mmoja wetu. Yeye anasema..................


Nimeona watu wame-point out kwamba good sex inaweza kumfanya mwanamke asimdharau mumewe. Wanaweza kuwa sahihi, lakini good sex alone haiwezi kusababisha mwanamke amheshimu mume wake.


Definition ya good sex inaendana heshima, upendo, kujali feelings za mwenzi, kumsikiliza mwenzako na mengineyo. Mfano, mume hawezi akawa anamnyanyasa mkewe, akawa anamtukana na kumkashifu, na akawa anam-hurt bila sababu yoyote, yet mwanamke akawa ana-enjoy sex, huyo mwanamke lazima atakuwa na matatizo kichwani. Good sex ni tendo la dakika chache, may be half an hr or at most one hr, siku ina masaa 24, masaa yanayobaki ni kero tupu, bado mtu atasema kwamba good sex inasababisha heshima?

Hivi kweli mtu anamdunda mangumi mke wake, anamtukana, anamkashifu kwamba ni mjinga ama mpumbafu, bado mkewe atakuwa na hamu ya kuifurahia hiyo good sex anayoipata kwa mumewe? Inawezekana if and only if hayo manyanyaso hayakeri kiasi cha kupekelea mwanamke kukereka. Good sex inaendana na mwanamke kuwa tayari kwa tendo, wengine akishakumbuka matusi, kashfa au manyanyaso hata bibi hawezi kulia tena wala kujisikia kutaka kukunwa.

Kuna walitaja pesa, lakini hapo kutakuwa na heshima ama nidhamu ya uoga, mwanamke hayuko huru ku-express feelings kwa mume wake ama kuonyesha kwamba nae ana mchango katika mali iliyopo. Wengi walio olewa kwa kufuata hela, ni kama vile walijiingiza jehanam ama jela, na hasa kama wanaume wenyewe ndo akina sisi ambao hatuna utu wa kutosha.

Mimi kwa maoni yangu, material things ni mambo ya kupita tu, tuna-acquire mali, magari, majumba na mengiyo lakini hayajengi heshima ya kweli. Kinacho-matter zaidi ni UPENDO tu. Kama kuna upendo wa kweli, mume hawezi kumtukana ama kumnyanyasa mkewe, hawezi kumpiga ama kumkashifu. Hivi kweli kitu unachokipenda unaweza kukikashifu? Basi labda kama hukukipenda. But the bottom line kwangu mimi ni upendo, esp, kwa upande wa wanaume. Mengineyo ni nyongeza tu.


Kwa upande wa wanawake, kama mtu kaolewa kwa kufuata material things na akaja kukuta material things zinaisha ama hazipo kama jinsi alivyokuwa anahisi, hapo ndipo dharau inapoweza kuanza, kashfa na mengineyo na ndipo mke ananza kufanya comparison kati ya mume wake na Baba Chanja wa jirani.

Upendo kati ya wahusika ni muhimu sana na huzaa hayo yote mengine, maana kama watu wanapendana kwa dhati, kweli msichana akiguswa tu tayari bibi kaitika. Mume hawezi kumuona mkewe ni mchafu ama ana shape mbaya, maana ndo alimchagua.


Tatizo la wanaume tumetaliwa na tamaa, huwa hatuna upendo wa dhati. Hapa ndipo signature ya Nyamayao inapohitajika, kwamba wanawake hupenda kabla ya kufanya ngono na wawapendao, sisi wanaume hutamani kwanza na baada ya kutamani huomba ngono na baada ya ngono ndipo tunapoweza kuanza kupenda. Tumeumbwa na mioyo ya tamaa. Hata Mungu aliagiza Biblia kwamba "Enyi waume wapendeni wake zenu". Wanawake wameagizwa kuwatii waume zao, kwa kuwa Mungu anajua wazi kwamba wanaume tumetaliwa na tamaa, badala ya kusema nimekutamani nitasema nimekupenda, maana nikisema nimekutamani tu, huwezi kunikubali. So ili nikupate nitasema nimekupenda ili uamini kwamba sikuhitaji kwa ajili ya jig jig tu, bali pia nina malengo ya muda mrefu.


Malengo ya muda mrefu ni outcome ya jig jig, baada ya hapo ndo upendo waweza kuja ama dharau zikaanza. Tatizo liko kwetu zaidi when you compare na wadada

 

[RealTz77]

mwanamke ndio shingo(anao uwezo kukugeuza upande atakao) mwanamume yee kichwa, soo kama mke akiweza timiza hayo hapo chini basi hakuna dharau,ktk mahusiano!pse wanawake msiisome kwa jazba!tafakarini tu kwa makini!

1. Behave like a female, i.e. with all the tenderness of a female.
2. Dress pleasantly and attractively. If you are a home-maker, don't stay in your sleeping suit all day.
3. Smell good.
4. Don't lay out all your problems on your husband as soon as he walks in. Give him a little mental break.
5. Don't keep asking him ‘what are you thinking?' because unlike women, men's thoughts are as random as the results of a google search. Women on the other hand have thoughts
as organized as a labeled file-cabinet!
6. Stop nagging non-stop before Allah gives you something really to complain about.
7. Absolutely no talking about your spousal problems to anyone you meet under the pretense of seeking help, even if you are the victim. If you think you want to solve legitimate marital issues then go seek counseling with the right person.
8. Be kind to your mother-in-law the same way you would like your husband to be kind to your own mother.
9. Learn all the rights and obligations of each other in religion.
10. Race to the door when he comes home, as if you were waiting for him. Smile and hug.
11. Keep your house clean, at least to the level that he wants it.
12. Compliment him on the things you know he's not so confident about (looks, intelligence etc). This will build his self-esteem.
13. Tell him he's the best husband.
14. Call his family often.
15. Give him a simple task to do at home and then thank him when he does it. This will encourage him to do more.
16. When he's talking about something boring, listen and nod your head. Even ask questions to make it seem like you're interested.
17. Encourage him to do good deeds.
18. If he's in a bad mood, give him some space. He'll get over it.
19. Thank him sincerely for providing you with food and shelter. It's a big deal.
20. If he's angry with you and starts yelling, let him yell it out while you're quiet. You will see your fight will end a lot faster. Then when he's calm, you can tell him your side of the story and how you want him to change something.
21. When you're mad at him, don't say ‘you make me furious,' rather say, ‘this action makes me upset.' Direct your anger to the action and circumstance rather than at him.
22. Remember that your husband has feelings, so take them into consideration.
23. Let him chill out with his friends without guilt, especially if they're good guys. Encourage him to go out, so he doesn't feel cooped up at home.
24. If your husband is annoyed over a little thing you do (and you can control it), then stop doing it.
25. Learn how to tell him what you expect without him having to guess all the time. Learn to communicate your feelings.
26. Don't get mad over small things. It's not worth it.
27. Make jokes. If you're not naturally funny, find some jokes on the internet.
28. Tell him you're the best wife and compliment yourself on certain things you know you're good at.
29. Learn to make his favorite dish.
30. Don't ever, ever talk bad about him with friends or family unnecessarily.
31. Use your time wisely and get things accomplished. If you're a housewife, take online classes and be active in your community. This will not only make you happy but will impress your husband too.
32. Do all of the above (i.e. trying to please your husband) for the sake of God and you will see God's blessings in everything you do.
33. Spouses are garments for each other; hide your husband's faults and help him get over them wisely.
34. Tell your husband you love him, many many times.
35. Have a race with your husband and let him win, even if you are much fitter than him.
36. Be fit and take care of your health; you will remain a strong mother, wife, cook and housekeeper.
37. Cultivate good manners. Do not be too loud, whether while laughing, talking or even walking.
38. Do not leave the house without his permission and certainly not without his knowledge.
39. Make sure all his clothes are clean and pressed so they always look fresh and crisp.
40. Ask God to strengthen and preserve the bonds of compassion and love between the two of you, every day in every prayer. Truly Satan's most treasured act is to create rifts between couples to the point of divorce. Seek God's refuge from Satan.
41. They say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, and that's really true.
42. Make sure you always have something for dinner.
43. Brush your hair everyday.
44. Don't forget to do the laundry.
45. Surprise him with gifts. Even necessities can be gifts, like a pair of new shoes.
46. Listen to him when he's talking. Don't interject him and talk about your own issues.
47. Try (hard as it might be) to take interest in his hobbies (bowling?). Try not to go shopping too much and spend all his money.
48. Look attractive and it's fine, in fact good, to be seductive towards him.
49. Learn tricks and techniques to please your husband in intimacy.
50. Prepare for special evenings with him with special dinner and exclusive time (no children permitted).
51. Take care of your skin, especially the face, which is the center of attraction.
52. If you are not satisfied intimately, talk to him and help him. Don't wait till matters become worse.
53. Never discuss important or controversial matters with him when he is tired or sleepy. Find the right time for the right discussion.
54. Learn to compromise.
55. Continue to do things for your husband and don't take him for granted.
56. Respect his rights (he's your road to paradise).
57. Make tea for him or whatever hot drink he likes, it will soothe his rough edges.

 

[Masikini_Jeuri]

Real na wadau wengine naomba muitafsiri hiyo list kwa kimanyema oops I mean kiswahili!😀

 

[Bigirita]

Nimekugongea kale katitu ketu!!

sasa hawa wenzetu, wanataka 50/50........wapi na wapi?

 

[Madabwada]

samahani wapendwa ninaomba niipost hii post kutoka kwa mdau mmoja wetu. Yeye anasema..................


Nimeona watu wame-point out kwamba good sex inaweza kumfanya mwanamke asimdharau mumewe. Wanaweza kuwa sahihi, lakini good sex alone haiwezi kusababisha mwanamke amheshimu mume wake.


Definition ya good sex inaendana heshima, upendo, kujali feelings za mwenzi, kumsikiliza mwenzako na mengineyo. Mfano, mume hawezi akawa anamnyanyasa mkewe, akawa anamtukana na kumkashifu, na akawa anam-hurt bila sababu yoyote, yet mwanamke akawa ana-enjoy sex, huyo mwanamke lazima atakuwa na matatizo kichwani. Good sex ni tendo la dakika chache, may be half an hr or at most one hr, siku ina masaa 24, masaa yanayobaki ni kero tupu, bado mtu atasema kwamba good sex inasababisha heshima?

Hivi kweli mtu anamdunda mangumi mke wake, anamtukana, anamkashifu kwamba ni mjinga ama mpumbafu, bado mkewe atakuwa na hamu ya kuifurahia hiyo good sex anayoipata kwa mumewe? Inawezekana if and only if hayo manyanyaso hayakeri kiasi cha kupekelea mwanamke kukereka. Good sex inaendana na mwanamke kuwa tayari kwa tendo, wengine akishakumbuka matusi, kashfa au manyanyaso hata bibi hawezi kulia tena wala kujisikia kutaka kukunwa.

Kuna walitaja pesa, lakini hapo kutakuwa na heshima ama nidhamu ya uoga, mwanamke hayuko huru ku-express feelings kwa mume wake ama kuonyesha kwamba nae ana mchango katika mali iliyopo. Wengi walio olewa kwa kufuata hela, ni kama vile walijiingiza jehanam ama jela, na hasa kama wanaume wenyewe ndo akina sisi ambao hatuna utu wa kutosha.

Mimi kwa maoni yangu, material things ni mambo ya kupita tu, tuna-acquire mali, magari, majumba na mengiyo lakini hayajengi heshima ya kweli. Kinacho-matter zaidi ni UPENDO tu. Kama kuna upendo wa kweli, mume hawezi kumtukana ama kumnyanyasa mkewe, hawezi kumpiga ama kumkashifu. Hivi kweli kitu unachokipenda unaweza kukikashifu? Basi labda kama hukukipenda. But the bottom line kwangu mimi ni upendo, esp, kwa upande wa wanaume. Mengineyo ni nyongeza tu.


Kwa upande wa wanawake, kama mtu kaolewa kwa kufuata material things na akaja kukuta material things zinaisha ama hazipo kama jinsi alivyokuwa anahisi, hapo ndipo dharau inapoweza kuanza, kashfa na mengineyo na ndipo mke ananza kufanya comparison kati ya mume wake na Baba Chanja wa jirani.

Upendo kati ya wahusika ni muhimu sana na huzaa hayo yote mengine, maana kama watu wanapendana kwa dhati, kweli msichana akiguswa tu tayari bibi kaitika. Mume hawezi kumuona mkewe ni mchafu ama ana shape mbaya, maana ndo alimchagua.


Tatizo la wanaume tumetaliwa na tamaa, huwa hatuna upendo wa dhati. Hapa ndipo signature ya Nyamayao inapohitajika, kwamba wanawake hupenda kabla ya kufanya ngono na wawapendao, sisi wanaume hutamani kwanza na baada ya kutamani huomba ngono na baada ya ngono ndipo tunapoweza kuanza kupenda. Tumeumbwa na mioyo ya tamaa. Hata Mungu aliagiza Biblia kwamba "Enyi waume wapendeni wake zenu". Wanawake wameagizwa kuwatii waume zao, kwa kuwa Mungu anajua wazi kwamba wanaume tumetaliwa na tamaa, badala ya kusema nimekutamani nitasema nimekupenda, maana nikisema nimekutamani tu, huwezi kunikubali. So ili nikupate nitasema nimekupenda ili uamini kwamba sikuhitaji kwa ajili ya jig jig tu, bali pia nina malengo ya muda mrefu.


Malengo ya muda mrefu ni outcome ya jig jig, baada ya hapo ndo upendo waweza kuja ama dharau zikaanza. Tatizo liko kwetu zaidi when you compare na wadada

tutazunguka mbuyu weeeee ... lakini ukweli ndio huo hapo juu! UPENDO tu!

 

[SHERRIF ARPAIO]

Dah Komredi hii mm naona sio lazima saaana.
Mwanamke ukimthamini na kumjali naamini hata kama humkuni sawa sawa atakupenda. Lakini kama humthamini na unamchukulia simple simple hata umfikishe mara 20 mawenzi atakuona **** tu.

Hawa viumbe hata ufanye nini hawaridhiki

 

[Daudi1]

Nafikiri kuna ukweli flani hapo ila hata unapokuwa na mume ambaye hatimizi majukumu yake nyumbani je haitapelekea kwa yeye kudharauliwa na mkewe? Kama ilivyo kwa mke ambaye pengine ana tabia ya uchafu, umbea n.k. ?

Kwa asilimia kubwaa mwanamke akitimiziwa haja ya mwili kwa usahihi anakuwa na heshima sana hata kama mwanaume atakuwa na vitukoo, wanawake wengi wanaolalamika sana kuhusiana na mime Mara nying tayari wanakuwa yametoka nje so huwa wanatafuta uhalali wa kuwa huko, wanaume tuwaahughulikien hawa vizuri heshima itakujaa tuu, haij kwa sababu una pesa la hasha!

 

[missyrose]

Hawa viumbe hata ufanye nini hawaridhiki

Endeleeni kujidanganya..

 

[okoyoko]

siamini kama great thinkers mnapoteza weekend yenu kuwajadili wanawake, mnapoteza muda wenu tu na hamtafikia conclusion mki-discuss hawa viumbe

 

[MZEE RAZA]

kama alikuwa na wanaume wengi kipindi cha nyuma na akikulinganisha na wewe anaona hauna lolote, hovyo hapo ameolewa na wewe kwaajili ya pesa tu labda, siyo mambo mengine ya ndani. hapo ndo mtajua umuhimu wa kumwomba Mungu akupatie kifaa kipyaaaa, au walau ambacho hakijasasambuliwa mara nyingi. hata kama ukiwa unamdunda kila siku, kama anaona unamfaa ndani ya chumbani, atakuheshimu tu. sasa, akiwa hakuwa amejitunza, yaani alikubuhu kipindi cha nyuma, ukamdunda na ndani kwenyewe ndo hakueleweki, basi ndo anakudharau na kuhamia nyumba ndogo kisirisiri hasa kama hajaokoka. ila kama ameokoka, labda kidogo image ya mambo ya kale yawezabadilika kidogo kwasababu Mungu hubadilisha chochote akitakacho. ushauri, oa mwanamke aliyeokoka (ambaye hautampata kama wewe haujaokoka), au kama mambo ndani yameshaanza kuharibika, kimbilieni kanisa la walokole haraka kabla hamjamalizana ndani.

Flora mbasha hakuokoka? GwajmA je?

 

[SHERRIF ARPAIO]

Flora mbasha hakuokoka? GwajmA je?

Ha ha ha

 

[SHERRIF ARPAIO]

Endeleeni kujidanganya..

Hatujidanganyi bali ndio hali halisi

 

[niachiemimi]

kama alikuwa na wanaume wengi kipindi cha nyuma na akikulinganisha na wewe anaona hauna lolote, hovyo hapo ameolewa na wewe kwaajili ya pesa tu labda, siyo mambo mengine ya ndani. hapo ndo mtajua umuhimu wa kumwomba Mungu akupatie kifaa kipyaaaa, au walau ambacho hakijasasambuliwa mara nyingi. hata kama ukiwa unamdunda kila siku, kama anaona unamfaa ndani ya chumbani, atakuheshimu tu. sasa, akiwa hakuwa amejitunza, yaani alikubuhu kipindi cha nyuma, ukamdunda na ndani kwenyewe ndo hakueleweki, basi ndo anakudharau na kuhamia nyumba ndogo kisirisiri hasa kama hajaokoka. ila kama ameokoka, labda kidogo image ya mambo ya kale yawezabadilika kidogo kwasababu Mungu hubadilisha chochote akitakacho. ushauri, oa mwanamke aliyeokoka (ambaye hautampata kama wewe haujaokoka), au kama mambo ndani yameshaanza kuharibika, kimbilieni kanisa la walokole haraka kabla hamjamalizana ndani.

Umeongea vizuri sana ila mimi imani kwa haya makanisa ya sijui mchungaji naniliu sina kabisa.

 

[Slim5]

Shem wangu na mmewe, nilikuwa nawasuluihisha, mke analalamika kuwa mshkaji anapiga 1 au 2, akijitahidi sana 3 tena mara chache chache! Yeye anataka 5 na kuendelea! Mimi niliwashauri kuvumiliana na shem akubali kuwa tatizo la mumewe ni lao ote (kitu ambacho mshikaji alielewa) hivo washirikiane kutatua, but shem alikuwa mbishi! Lakini mshikaji ameweza kujenga nyumba, wana watoto, wanasoma international, shem kanunuliwa gari, kapewa mtaji wa biashara, nikauliza "bao 5 unazotaka zitalipa ada ya watoto" au zitajenga nyumba au zitanunua magari, zitatibia watoto wakiumwa! Nilieleweka vibaya!

Nilipomuuliza usiku wa kulala njaa anaweza kudai goli 5! Hakunipa jibu!

 

[Asprin]

Hawa viumbe hata ufanye nini hawaridhiki

Komredi naona umedhamiria kutumbua majipu ya serikali iliyopita....

 

[Rutorial k]

Ndicho nisemacho mimi hapa mpenz AK. Kwa nini usimfikishe mwenzio basi? au ndo suala la uselfish nifaidi mie fish?

swala la kumfikisha linaweza likawa juu ya uwezo wa mwanaume...hilo nalo hulioni?

 

[SHERRIF ARPAIO]

Komredi naona umedhamiria kutumbua majipu ya serikali iliyopita....

Mkuu umehamia huku!
Old is gold

 

[nzalendo]

Kila mtu na mtazamo wake///////////

 

[SHERRIF ARPAIO]

Kila mtu na mtazamo wake///////////

Kweli kabisa mkuu