JF Chit-Chats

General Chat, Talk about anything that falls under no category on the board, but remember FOLLOW THE RULES!
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Nauliza hivi,humu jf nani ni rafiki yako wa mtandao ambaye kwa sura hamfahamiani (hamjawahi kukutana physically wala kwa simu) lakini hisia zako kwake ni za mtu ambaye mko karibu (you are...
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Wadau sijui ni peke yangu, Jamani mi naogopa MENDE balaa, yaani akiingia chumbani siwezi lala, Kuna wale wanaoruka ndio balaa kabisa. Yani nikiona MENDE mwili unasisimuka, halafu kwa chini mbona...
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There's a bear and a rabbit in t he woods and they come a cross a golden frog. They think this is an amazing discovery and they're even more amazed when it starts talking to them . The golden frog...
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A man is in court. The Judges says,"on the 3rd August you are accused of killing your wife by beating her to death with a hammer, how do you plead?" "Guilty", said the man in the dock. At this...
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mshkaji mmoja alizamia kwenye shughuli ya waislamu na ili apate kipaumbele akajifanya bonge la imamu si akaangusha dua huku watu wakiitikia ifuatavyo IMAMU ya tawfiq, WATU amin! ya tawheed amin...
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A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, "Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer." The inscriber insisted that such an...
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A man decides to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the results. On his way home, he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving, he says to...
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Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat. The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them...
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A father passing by his teenage daughter's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was neat and tidy. Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the centre of...
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For those of you who watch what you eat... Here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting medical studies. 1. The Japanese eat very...
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A guy walks into a bar with a small dog. The bartender says, "Get out of here with that dog!" The guy says, "But this isn't just any dog... this dog can play the piano!" The bartender replies...
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1. Coca-cola was originally green. 2. Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than for the US Treasury. 3. Smartest dogs: 1) border collie; 2)poodle; 3)golden retriever. 4. Dumbest dog...
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An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. "I want to become a lawyer. How much is it or the express degree you told me about?" "It's $50,000," the lawyer...
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Majogoo waliamua kufunga barabara na kufanya uharibifu mkubwa kama kufukuafukua mashimo kwenye barabara ya Ilala Buguruni wakipinga matumizi makubwa ya mimba za wake zao. Walipo ulizwa walidai...
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Jaman nawaogopa sana wasichana wenye majini,ila sasa nina demu wangu mwenye majini sa cjui itakuweje na wakat namuogopa ila najkaza ksabun kutokana na yeye kunipenda kwa dhati.
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ORDERING PIZZA Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number? Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order. Operator: I must have your NIDN first, sir. Customer: My...
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Siku ya arusi, wanandoa walijifungia ndani katika ghorofa ya juu na kuanza jigy jigy mfuflulizo kuanzia usiku mpaka asubuhi, wakaendelea mpaka jioni, usiku ukaingia wakaendelea mpaka asubuhi...
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Grieving A man visiting a cemetery heard a second man who was kneeling at a nearby grave crying-out loudly, "Why did you have to die?!!? Why did you have to die?!!?". The first man was so moved...
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imagine yale mabao ya ucku yangelikuwa yanatoa sauti. watu wangepasuka ngoma za masikio. mara pyuuuu,chwiii hebu ongezea!
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