Would you marry me?

[AshaDii]

saint ivuga

My mwali is this true.... Dah! Mbona anafanya mambo kienyeji? lol

 

[AshaDii]

Mwali swali zuri sana, kuna watu wapo kwenye mahusiano ya ugf na ubf lakini anajua kabisa huyu sitomuoa au sitoelewa nae na sababu nyingi kama ulivyozisema. Tatizo hakuna kati yao anaejitahidi kushape behaviour ya mwenzie iendane na vigezo vyake na ndio maana malalamiko hayaishi, wanaume wanataka kuoa malaika. Hakuna malaika jamani ulimwengu huu na umri unakimbia.

Naomba msome hii post.... Itawasaidia kujenga.... (Courtesy of Mandumla) Read, understand na connect the dots hasa hapo nilipo bold.

Kilaza,

Ndugu yangu mke huwa hatafutwi, yani inatokea tu una date mtu hadi unaona mmh hapa sasa sina ujanja.

Mwenzako mimi nilikuwa nimemaliza chuo nipo kitaa sina kazi full kujirusha tuu na washikaji naanza starehe Alhamisi namaliza Jumapili na sitoki club had nisikie swalaaa swalaa lol...kipindi hiko sina hata mpango wa kuoa mtu akisema swala la ndoa namuona mshamba and thats when i met MRS Right.

Nilikuwa na mshikaji tunatoka usiku one akapigiwa simu na cousin yake binti aliyekuwa anasoma chuo Dsm akiomba twende tuka wa pick hostel coz nae alikuwa na shosti wake wangependa kwenda out. Mshikaji alichomoa,lakini nikamsihi tukawachukue after all itakuwa poa kuwa na company. That night nili dance sana na cousin yake mshikaji huku jicho langu lipo kwa shosti wake na cousin. Maana alikuwa anang'aa hadi balaa.Offcoz mshikaji alikuwa ana dance na shosti mtu ambaye ndio my waifu wangu kwa sasa. After hapo tuka date kwa takriban miaka 4 alikuwa akitaja swala la ndoa ananitibua lakini finally nikaoa huyo huyo.

 

[fazaa]

Mimi mmoja nimekasirika kwa hiyo lugha uliyotumia kwenye red.

Kweli ndugu hapo nilitumia lugha chafu, vizuri kwa ku highlighted kosa langu.

 

[Michelle]

Naweza nikasema kua kitu ambacho wanawake wengi tunakosea ni ile kuchagua kua kati ya a hot crazy chic na a decent lady.... Wanasahau ama wanashindwa tambua kua you can be both, yooote kutegemea na timing. Daima as a woman or lady strive to be something your man is proud of katika mazingira yoyote yale.

The secret in all this ni wewe mwanamke kutambua kua wewe ni mwanamke, kua proud kua wewe ni mwanamkea na play your role as a woman beside your manMwanaume atoke nje kwa tama. a zake, ama maybe tu imetokea bahati mbaya au maybe tu hamjablend, lakini sio sababu eti kukudefine wewe ni wife material hufai. You as a woman inabidi ukiwa nyumbani be a Great Wife and Mama, na ukiwa na your man mtaani mpaka wenzie waulize "Is she your gal friend/nyumba ndogo?" Nakubali na najua ni ngumu.... But it is possible.

Yaani wewe dearest...natamani kasehemu tu ka akili yako na utulivu wako, niki-blend na haka kangu basi maisha yangu yatabadilika..:A S-coffee:

 

[Michelle]

My mwali is this true.... Dah! Mbona anafanya mambo kienyeji? lol

He he he dearest, Mwali alishanidokeza mimi kama dada yake na lost twin wake...taratibu za kuwafikia zinaendelea...msimchape!

 

[AshaDii]

Nikimnukulu Mwali, "Wife material ni mpole, mtiifu, ana background nzuri, ni msomi kiasi, future oriented etc. Girlfriend material ana sura na umbo nzuri, ni mcheshi, anapenda kwenda out, ni mtundu kiasi."

Kitu cha kwanza ni kuondokana na hiyo dhana.

Kama walivyosema baadhi hapo juu, kwangu mimi mke pia ni girlfriend na ni "nyumba ndogo" , mhudumu wa bar, trafiki, etc in her own right. Inategemea na mazingira...wapi, wakati gani, kwa namna gani! Hivyo ni muhumu saaaana kupata mke/mume ambaye ni FLEXIBLE kulingana na mazingira ili aweze kucope na hali mbali mbali zinavyojitokeza.

Sweetie what can I possibly say hapa? When you hear your MAN defining you this way behind you back...... Tonight you will see how Grateful I really am of this post and how I truly Love you.....(blushing):busu

 

[AshaDii]

Kaizer ukitulia nakukubali sana.... perfect adviser, perfect mume,perfect friend...lol

Ukisema wewe maybe hatimae they will understand why I am proudly his....lol... Mzima Michelle?

 

[AshaDii]

Yaani wewe dearest...natamani kasehemu tu ka akili yako na utulivu wako, niki-blend na haka kangu basi maisha yangu yatabadilika..:A S-coffee:

That from a fellow woman, who is intelligent too..... I am Humbled.... THANKS Dearest.....

 

[AshaDii]

He he he dearest, Mwali alishanidokeza mimi kama dada yake na lost twin wake...taratibu za kuwafikia zinaendelea...msimchape!

Khaaaa!!! Hii inanifanya ni log off! Pressure imepaa.....lol

 

[Da Womanizer]

Lizzy umenipa akili... Ila hiyo balance sio rahisi kupata...
Hapo juu ulipo sema kuhusu majukumu ni kweli kabisa.
Mi naona siri ya mapenzi ya kabla ya ndoa ni ile spontaneity na kule kufurahia the moment you live, hata kama hamna chochote. bahati mbaya mkisha oana basi, yanaisha. spouses wengi wanakua focused sana kwenye pesa, na mara nyingi wenye future. Hakuna ubaya ila usipo furahia tulicho nacho sasa hivi hata hicho unacho vizia kutata kesho huto furahia. Na hapo ndipo unaona mmoja anaanza kutafuta a spontanious friend wa kupoteza mawazo...
BTW, if I was a dude I would marry you too, I love challenging minds. lol

You mean if you were a dude with the same mentality as the one you have now.

 

[Mwali]

My mwali is this true.... Dah! Mbona anafanya mambo kienyeji? lol

He he he dearest, Mwali alishanidokeza mimi kama dada yake na lost twin wake...taratibu za kuwafikia zinaendelea...msimchape!

Muongo huyo Anti! nilimkanya akakimbia haraka. he is just trying to position himself. lol

 

[Mwali]

You mean if you were a dude with the same mentality as the one you have now.

Ningekua mwanaume ningekua na mentality hii hii nadhani...

 

[Mwali]

Khaaaa!!! Hii inanifanya ni log off! Pressure imepaa.....lol

Anti jamani, humjui Mwali wako? hivi unaamini kabisa naweza kufanya hivo? Baada ya miezi 3 ya kufundwa?

 

[Mwali]

Nikimnukulu Mwali, "Wife material ni mpole, mtiifu, ana background nzuri, ni msomi kiasi, future oriented etc. Girlfriend material ana sura na umbo nzuri, ni mcheshi, anapenda kwenda out, ni mtundu kiasi."
Kitu cha kwanza ni kuondokana na hiyo dhana.

Kama walivyosema baadhi hapo juu, kwangu mimi mke pia ni girlfriend na ni "nyumba ndogo" , mhudumu wa bar, trafiki, etc in her own right. Inategemea na mazingira...wapi, wakati gani, kwa namna gani! Hivyo ni muhumu saaaana kupata mke/mume ambaye ni FLEXIBLE kulingana na mazingira ili aweze kucope na hali mbali mbali zinavyojitokeza.

Hivyo basi, Mwali mpwa wangu, be yourself. Kama unapenda kwenda club, na any other social activities za girlfriends, zifanye. Kama pia wapenda kuact kama 'wife material' then be...ILA tu usipretend kwa sababu hii ndo number one killer ya mahusiano yoyote yale. Ukiishi kama wewe, utampata ambaye atapenda maisha yako yalivyo, na wewe utayapenda.

Naweza nikasema kua kitu ambacho wanawake wengi tunakosea ni ile kuchagua kua kati ya a hot crazy chic na a decent lady.... Wanasahau ama wanashindwa tambua kua you can be both, yooote kutegemea na timing. Daima as a woman or lady strive to be something your man is proud of katika mazingira yoyote yale.

The secret in all this ni wewe mwanamke kutambua kua wewe ni mwanamke, kua proud kua wewe ni mwanamkea na play your role as a woman beside your man. Mwanaume atoke nje kwa tamaa zake, ama maybe tu imetokea bahati mbaya au maybe tu hamjablend, lakini sio sababu eti kukudefine wewe ni wife material hufai. You as a woman inabidi ukiwa nyumbani be a Great Wife and Mama, na ukiwa na your man mtaani mpaka wenzie waulize "Is she your gal friend/nyumba ndogo?" Nakubali na najua ni ngumu.... But it is possible.

Dah! kweli nikimpata huyo mtu lazima harusi mtasimamia nyinyi tu. Ona hapo in green vile mmoja ana echoe mwenzie...
Alafu in bold nimeelewa, I can be both alternatively, kufatana na mood, kufatana na mazingira... Asanteni sana Uncle na Anti.
Alafu hapo nilipo pigilia mstari, special thanks...

 

[DOOKY]

If I was a 'dude' maybe. . .lolz

Nwy. . Binafsi nadhani mtu anaweza akawa na zote, za mke na za girlfriend, za mume na za boyfriend. Tatizo ni kwamba wengine wakishaingia kwenye ndoa hata kama mwanzoni walikua exciting, fun, sweet, caringand wild chumbani basi wanaacha kwasababu wanaona hawahitaji tena kuwa walivyokua kwasababu ndege yupo tunduni tayari. Maisha yanaanza kurevolve around 'bills' na 'pesa za matumizi'. . Simu zikipigwa/text zikitumwa sio za 'umeshakula mpenzi? Nimekumiss!! Nakupenda!! Jana ulifanya siku yangu nzuri sana!!" ni za "Ile pesa mbona hukuacha? Hao walevi wenzako ndio muhimu ehhh? Mi naenda kwa shogangu??Sitorudi nyumbani leo! Sina pesa" n.k

Maisha yanakua stressful tena bila mtu wa kusaidia kuzipunguza kwasababu mtegemewa ndie anaesababisha. Sauti (tone) ndani ya nyumba inabadilika, unyumba leo huyu akimnyima mwenzie kesho mwingine nae anakataa, mama anamwachia kila kitu housegirl wakati kipingi cha 'upenzi' alikua analazimisha akamsafishie mwanaume chumba kila wiki na kumpikia hata weekend, mama anaona kitanda hakitoshi (kidogo anabanwa) wakati kipindi cha upenzi alikua analalamika ni namna gani anahisi upweke usiku, mwanaume akitoka kazini anaenda kupata kinywaji kwanza kwasababu kukutana na mke bila kinywaji ni mwanzo wa maumivu ya kichwa wakati kipindi cha upenzi alifanana na mtu asiyekunywa na mengine kama hayo.

Watu hua wanadai kwamba majukumu ndio yanayowabadilisha ila mimi nasema hapana. Majukumu yanaweza yakambadili mtu kidogo na sio kumfanya awe mtu mwingine kabisa kama ilivyo kwa baadhi ya watu.

Maintain a lil bit of you crazy self, your silly self, your sweet self, your charming self, your caring self, your wise/smart self, your generous self and enjoy life. That way your man/woman will enjoy having you just aswell.

Yaani .....

 

[Michelle]

Sweetie what can I possibly say hapa? When you hear your MAN defining you this way behind you back...... Tonight you will see how Grateful I really am of this post and how I truly Love you.....(blushing):busu

Chaboooooooooooooooo, on my way....najipaka dawa ya mbu nakuja hapo kuchungulia......am excited....lol hoto:

Ukisema wewe maybe hatimae they will understand why I am proudly his....lol... Mzima Michelle?

Mi mzima,wivu tu umenikaba...wenzangu wakisifiwa mi kila siku natangaziwa kasoro mpya...you are lucky,take care of Kaizer!

 

[Ambitious]

Nashindwa kuamini kua such an descriptive analysis iliishia hapo... twambie how do we overcome this then? tunafanyaje to keep the flame alive?

We just have to live our lives and stop hiding behind them.A predetermined formula is the root cause of all the blunders mentioned earlier since there are no such things as love guides.
-Women should stop taking too seriously all the things they read in magazines or hear from their shostis or acquaintances.In addition to that the fairytale attitude has to be abandoned,being a good wife and mother is more than enough.
-Husbands should not be overly concerned with the likes of work,alcohol,spectator sports than their wives and kids(especially wives b'se we are likely to live forever with our wives than kids),being too serious and unentertaining at family level is not the way forward,you might be a manager/director at work but remember you are just a husband and father at home your other skills come second.
-That is all i think of for now and this aint the law either.When husbands and wives become paranoid and excessively worried about how their marriage is not perfect that is when marriage counselors raise their profit margins.

 

[Mwali]

Mimi mmoja nimekasirika kwa hiyo lugha uliyotumia kwenye red.
:focus:Labda nianze na kuelezea vile maisha yanapokuwa kabla na baada ya ndoa.
Wakati wa u-bf/u-gf:
- Kila mmoja anaishi kwao/kwake (hamko chini ya paa moja masaa 24). Katika kipindi hiki, kuonana yenu inakuwa ya nadra na kupanga. Kunakuwepo na maandalizi japo madogo kabla kuonana - nitoke vipi, niji-behave vipi, tuonane wapi (nisionekane). ME hata kama kachacha, siku hii atajipigapiga; KE atafanya aonekane asivyoonekana.Kila mmoja atataka aonekane mzuri, nje kimwonekano na ndani kitabia.
Mnapoishi pamoja, iwe kwenye ndoa au kukaa pamoja tu.
- Kwanza ile hali tu ya kuwepo pamoja tu 24hrs a day, 7days a week, all the time inabadilisha kila kitu, (hapa simaanishi kuwa hakuna anayeondoka alipo lakini katika masaa 24 ya siku angalau saa 6-8 mtakuwa pamoja). Hakuna tena kujiandaa uonekane vipi, kila mmoja anakuwa kama aivyo katika uhalisia wake, ambavyo mwenzake hakuwahi kumwona kabla ya kuishi pamoja. Zile caring, worrying, treating, listening, behaving...za wakati wa u-bf/-u-gf zinaanza kuyeyuka. Zile samahani zilizokuwa zinatolewa bure, mfano alipokuwa gf/bf unapiga simu imezimwa, hapatikani anazungumza dkk 30 saa moja badae unaambiwa nilikuwa mkutanoni, niliweka silence, iliisha chaji; ule uongo au kweli wa kuwa leo ninaenda kumwona shangazi, wiki ijayo nitakuwa mkutanoni... unaamini kila kitu bila ya maswali wala masharti; lakini mkiwa pamoja unaanza kuzidadisi, kuomba maelezo kamili, na pengine kutilia shaka.

Suluhisho
- Tuwe kama tulivyo wakati wa u-bf/u-gf. Usijaribu utake kuonekana vyengine na kujenga picha ambayo iko siku "itaungua" na kubaki "negative". Ikiwa atakukubali kama ulivyo leo na mkakubaliana iwe hivyo, atakayedai ziada anajitafutia presha za bure.

- Ndoa/kuishi pamoja ni ahadi na wajibu, timiza; ni haki, itoe; ni kuvumiliana, vumilia; ni kusamehe, samehe; ni kupenda na kuheshimiana, penda na heshimu ili nawe upendwe na kuheshimiwa.

- Ingawa wengine wanaweza kukataa, nahisi ule mvuto wa siku/miaka ya nyuma; zile nilizozitaja hapo juu: caring, worrying, treating, listening, behaving...zinaweza kufa kidogo kidogo kama hamkuzidumisha kwa maneno na vitendo; yale mapenzi moto moto yanaweza kufifia kidogo kidogo. Na sio kwa sababu hampendani wala hamtakani, lakini hamna wakati wa kutosha kama mlipokuwa mnaishi mbali mbali. Lakini kama alivyosema Lizzy, basi nobe ndani ya saa 24 unashindwa hata kumega saa moja ya kuwa na mpenzi wako ya kuishi mkajikumbusha na kutenda yale yaliyokuwa yanawapagaza mlipokuwa gf/bf?

This is deep Mamamia. Ngoja nii print niweke ukutani...

 

[Kaizer]

Sweetie what can I possibly say hapa? When you hear your MAN defining you this way behind you back...... Tonight you will see how Grateful I really am of this post and how I truly Love you.....(blushing):busu

Thanks Love:tongue:....watoto na wapwa mmesikia? msisome hapa......:A S-coffee:

 

[Kaizer]

Chaboooooooooooooooo, on my way....najipaka dawa ya mbu nakuja hapo kuchungulia......am excited....lol hoto:

OMG....Too late I think for the warning....Michelle....Come This Way..:juggle:

Mi mzima,wivu tu umenikaba...wenzangu wakisifiwa mi kila siku natangaziwa kasoro mpya...you are lucky,take care of Kaizer!

Hapa Michelle kama sio kweli vile.....mmmh:gossip: