Kujizuia na 'personality change' ........

[Ndahani]

Ndahani unasahau Mandela ni mtu very special
kuamini kila mtu anaweza alichoweza Mandela ni kujidanganya..
he was gifted....sio easy kwa kila mtu

The Boss, we are all gifted but the way we engage our minds make a lot of difference. I read the book long walk to freedom and one of the things he worked very hard to overcome was the conditions of the prison and prison warders to give him new identity...that is 100% the game of the mind. But how many of us learn the tricks and apply in life? Ndio maana wengine we succumb to the mercy of the events, come what may!

 

[The Boss]

The Boss, we are all gifted but the way we engage our minds make a lot of difference. I read the book long walk to freedom and one of the things he worked very hard to overcome was the conditions of the prison and prison warders to give him new identity...that is 100% the game of the mind. But how many of us learn the tricks and apply in life? Ndio maana wengine we succumb to the mercy of the events, come what may!

Ni asilimia ndogo mno ambao wataweza kufanya alichofanya Mandela
wengi tunakwenda na hali ya hewa inavyokwenda,ingawa ni changamoto kwetu kujizuia

 

[Zion Daughter]

hili ndo tatizo linalosumbua sana siku hizi......
mtu anapata matatizo anakimbilia kuhama kanisa..... sijui anafikiria pale alipo ndo pamemsababishia matatizo?
matokeo yake huko anakoenda anaona pia hakuna kinachoendelea, maisha yapo vile vile hakuna unafuu wowote....
mwisho wa siku unamkuta huyo mtu kawa kama kichaa....
watu wengi hasa sisi wamama tunateswa sana na hii kitu, sijui tutatokaje huko jamani

Ni kweli..ukizingatia hata matangazo ya wachungaji yamewekwa kama ya waganga..utasikia..je hujaolewa na unataka mume??je unataka kwenda ulaya??unatafuta mtoto??njoo kwa mtume na nabii anayo dawa...na watu wanauhitaji kweli wataacha kujaa???Dawa ya hii jambo sijui kama ipo ila ni mtu mwenyewe kujitambua yeye ni nani na mahusiano yake binafsi na Mungu yapoje

 

[Ndahani]

Ni asilimia ndogo mno ambao wataweza kufanya alichofanya Mandela
wengi tunakwenda na hali ya hewa inavyokwenda,ingawa ni changamoto kwetu kujizuia

That is very true. Mimi ni mhanga wa mageuzi yatokanayo na jinsi mambo yanavyokwenda...najitahidi kurudi kwenye mstari lakini ngumu kweli kweli. Kwahiyo kwangu Mandela ni miongoni mwa watu wachache walioonyesha tukithubutu tunaweza kwenye maisha.

 

[double R]

Mi namshukuru Mungu kuwa huwa sishtushwi sana.Msiba na hali ya maisha iliniumiza zilinipa changamoto kufanya bidii nifikie malengo yangu. Nadhani muhimu nikujiwekea dila na kuyafanyia kazi tena bila kuwa na wasiwasi na kutoruhusu tofauti ndogo zibadili dira yako. Maumivu ya muda mrefu yanaweza kufutika kama ukikubali ukweli kwamba hilo nalo ndio wakati wake na kuanza kuiishi leo. Kusamehe pia husaidia kusonga mbele, kuwaona walikukosea pia nao ni binadamu wasio kamili kama wewe na kile ambacho wamekufanyia ni udhaifu wao. Ukiishi na watu kwa kushukuru kwa yale mema waliyonayo na kuvumilia kasoro zao ikiwa ni pamoja na kuwasaidia, maisha yako yatakuwa na furaha.

 

[vicarious]

Inamaana we hapo hujui lakufanya kabisaaaa au unatutega

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[Fixed Point]

That is very true. Mimi ni mhanga wa mageuzi yatokanayo na jinsi mambo yanavyokwenda...najitahidi kurudi kwenye mstari lakini ngumu kweli kweli. Kwahiyo kwangu Mandela ni miongoni mwa watu wachache walioonyesha tukithubutu tunaweza kwenye maisha.

Ndahani, ni swala la kuamua tu, hakuna kitu kinachoshindikana....
hili swala la kujizuia ni gumu sana, ila ukiliweza linakupa furaha sana moyoni. Mimi pia ni mmoja wa watu ambao naweza kufanya hivyo, watu wengi wa karibu na mimi huwa wananishangaa sana nawezaje? mimi mwenyewe siwezi kusema kwa uhakika nawezaje lakini najua naweza.
kuna wakati watu wanaweza wakanifanyia kitu na baadae wakawa hata kuniona hawataki kwa jinsi kinavyowaumiza, lakini mimi huwa nina uwezo wa kuwafwata na kufanya maisha yarudi kama zamani. na huwa nikifanikiwa nafarijika sana, nakuwa na amani moyoni

 

[Fixed Point]

Ni kweli..ukizingatia hata matangazo ya wachungaji yamewekwa kama ya waganga..utasikia..je hujaolewa na unataka mume??je unataka kwenda ulaya??unatafuta mtoto??njoo kwa mtume na nabii anayo dawa...na watu wanauhitaji kweli wataacha kujaa???Dawa ya hii jambo sijui kama ipo ila ni mtu mwenyewe kujitambua yeye ni nani na mahusiano yake binafsi na Mungu yapoje

hapo sasa.......
siyo tunaenda kumwabudu Mungu bali kutatua matatizo yetu, lol!

 

[King’asti]

Usisahau mandela baada ya kutoka jela aliachana na mkewe. I was a teen then, nilisikitishwa sana na divorce yao. I even cried, na kujiuliza aafter all these years, why why and why!

Mandela ndio katika hilo kundi la watu waliojaliwa shock absorbers za hali ya juu. Pamoja na kukutwa na matatizo chungu nzima kwa miaka mingi yeye na familia yake lakini bado alipopata nafasi hakuamua kulipiza kisasi au kuendelea kuhuzunika bali kuwasamehe wote waliomtesa kwa miaka chungu nzima, hili la kusamehe lilimletea furaha kubwa sana maishani mwake na heshima kubwa kila kona ya dunia hii.

 

[BAK]

Unayoyasema ni kweli Best wengi sana waliumia kutokana na kuachwa Winnie na mie nikiwemo lakini nilivyofuatilia kujua kisa na mkasa nikagundua vijimaneno maneno kwamba mama alikuwa anajirusha kwa raha zake na vijana wadogo wadogo. Sikuuona ushahidi wa kina wa kuthibitisha hilo lakini labda ushahidi aliopewa Mandela na mengine ya ziada ulitosha kumuwezesha kufanya maamuzi mazito.

Usisahau mandela baada ya kutoka jela aliachana na mkewe. I was a teen then, nilisikitishwa sana na divorce yao. I even cried, na kujiuliza aafter all these years, why why and why![/QUOTE]

 

[BAK]

Sina uhakika na hili lakini kwa maoni yangu Mandela ni mmoja wa binadamu wale ambao hawana mioyo ya kulipiza kisasi. Si ajabu wengi South Africa na hata Africa wangependa kuona Mandela anawapandisha kizimbani makaburu wote waliokuwa hai wakati ule ambao walihusika kwa namna moja au nyingine na kifungo chake na mateso makubwa aliyoyapata akiwa jela, mauaji makubwa yaliyofanywa na Serikali ya Makaburu dhidi ya maelfu ya Wasouth Afrika yakiwemo mateso makubwa sana, lakini badala ya kulipiza kisasi akaamua kuunda tume ili kutafuta reconciliation ya kuiwezesha nchi iondokane na chuki kubwa iliyokuwepo.

Unaweza sema na yeye pia alibadilishwa na yaliyomkuta
labda asingefungwa asingeweza kusamehe
au tuseme yeye alibadilika kuwa better?

 

[neggirl]

Daaaa..

Changamoto mbalimbali ktk maisha zinaweza kumfanya mtu hata akamkana Mungu wake au akahisi kama hakuna Mungu.

Unahisi kama yanakukuta wewe tu na maisha hayako fair.

Just learned one thing here.. Kujifunza kuyakubali mambo ambayo huwezi kuyabadili pindi yanapotokea.

Thax The Boss for this useful post. Be blessed.

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[imaney]

i miss my old self,😱hwell:....
lost my job,failed school,diagnosed with schizophrenia....in the last five years life has been shit!and my future is still blank....😱hwell:,constant worrying,being depressed has a knock on effect on my health.....i am angry/sad all the time,put on weight and i cant sleep..........as a result i hate my self as i was once size 14 happy-go person

 

[cute beiby]

Gud and meaningful Topic , hopeful imewagusa wengi as well as wathirika wa Personality change.

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[gfsonwin]

The Boss,
mara yingi sana haiba hubadilika kutokana na mazingir ma scenarios zinazokukabaili ama unazokumbana nazo ziwe njem ama mbaya.

most of us we do think pple change due to matatizo tu lkn ukweli ni kwamba hata raha nazo humfanya mtu akabadilika sana kiasi kwamba ukataman arudi ukwanza wake.

sometimes ili mtu asibadilike sana aanahitaj zaid kujitambua na kujua kwamba anabadilika je iakuwa chanya ama hasi. na je katika mabadiliko hayo atavumilika ama la.

nampenda mtu ambaye hukubali kwamba sasa nimebadilika sio tena yule gsonwin wa zamani lakni nampenda zaid yule ambaye pamoja na kukubali kwamba amebadilika huchukua hatua zaid ya kurekebisha mabadiliko yake yaendane na maisha ya kawaida tuliyoyazoea.

mara zote kujitambua ni jambo zuri sana kwenye maisha lkn pia kuangalia upitapo ni jambo zuri zaid.

 

[Ndahani]

Ndahani, ni swala la kuamua tu, hakuna kitu kinachoshindikana....
hili swala la kujizuia ni gumu sana, ila ukiliweza linakupa furaha sana moyoni. Mimi pia ni mmoja wa watu ambao naweza kufanya hivyo, watu wengi wa karibu na mimi huwa wananishangaa sana nawezaje? mimi mwenyewe siwezi kusema kwa uhakika nawezaje lakini najua naweza.
kuna wakati watu wanaweza wakanifanyia kitu na baadae wakawa hata kuniona hawataki kwa jinsi kinavyowaumiza, lakini mimi huwa nina uwezo wa kuwafwata na kufanya maisha yarudi kama zamani. na huwa nikifanikiwa nafarijika sana, nakuwa na amani moyoni

That is the game of mind...kucheza na mind na kuamua jema badala si kitu kidogo....ngumu kweli kweli...ndio maana tunapigana tuwe better...hii topic ni nzuri sana ingawa naona wachangiaji tunaikwepa...inalenga kule kwa comfort zone zetu.

 

[Roulette]

Binafsi naamini kua people HAVE to change. If one doesn't like the new me, maybe it is time for her/him to move on? Sometimes the "new me" is just temporar because of stress as you say, then just gimme some space.
Kitu ambacho sio rahisi kutambua ni kua sometimes as a person has changes their entourage entourage changes too. they either complain too much of the change (WHICH IR TIRESOME) or they also move back.
All in all mi sioni ubaya watu kubadilika from time to time, iwe temporar or permanent.

 

[Blue G]

Tatizo lilikuwa nini mkuu?ulijijua kuwa umepoteza old personality yako au uliambiwa na watu pembeni yako?na uliwezaje kurudi the old you mpaka sa hivi? em tuambie kwa faida ya wanajamii coz am pretty sure jambo hili inawakuta wengi tu.

niliwah kujimiss the real me ilikuwa ngumu kurudi hali yangu ya kawaida thanks to god im better now

 

[Ndahani]

Usisahau mandela baada ya kutoka jela aliachana na mkewe. I was a teen then, nilisikitishwa sana na divorce yao. I even cried, na kujiuliza aafter all these years, why why and why!

Unajua Winnie aishakuwa ganster? Mzee Mandela asingeiweza speed ile...serengeti bos kwa kwenda mbele....Ila last but not least....avator ako iko poa,lol!

 

[Mbu]

Maisha tunayoishi yana Pressure na Stress tele siku hizi

ni ngumu kukuta watu wana 'peace of mind'
watu wengi ama wanakumbana na changamoto mbalimbali za maisha
au wamezipitia na zimeacha alama mioyoni mwao

hizi alama au makovu ya maisha kwenye mambo mbalimbali
mfano
talaka
kufukuzwa kazi
kufilisika
kukimbiwa na mke/mume
kufiwa na mke/mume/watoto/wazazi
kupata ajali
magonjwa na kadhalika wa kadhalika hupelekea baadhi ya watu wakabadilika kabisa
kiasi kwamba akawa mtu tofauti na uliyemzoea

Wengine walizaliwa wacheshi na tabasamu kutwa unakutana nao after years wana sura za huzuni
na kisirani au hasira kiasi hadi unawamiss ,una miss their old personality.....

Inawezekana hata sisi bila kujijua tunabadilika na kupelekea wapendwa wetu watu miss
ingawa tuko nao au ingawa tuko available..lakini kutokana na life experiences mtu anabadilika
hadi unashindwa ku relate nae kabisa.....

Swali hapa je unajizuia vipi na hali hiii?

....kubali mabadiliko bila kuathiri yaliyo ya msingi katika maisha, mfano kwangu mie ni;

1. Afya yangu ambayo ndio utajiri wa kweli.
2. kipato, iwe ni ajira, biashara, au chochote kinachonihakikishia nitapata angalau basic needs i.e chakula, maji, hewa safi, pahala pa kulala...
3. Mawasiliano! ....kiukweli, mawasiliano iwe face to face, sms, simu, internet, ni muhimu sana kwa afya yangu ya akili

au unapokutana na mpendwa wako katika hali hii unafanyaje?

....muhimu kumkumbusha 'usongo wa mawazo' usipouendekeza ni hali ya mpito.

It is ok to feel down, hata ikiwezekana hata akilia kama njia ya kupunguza machungu, au hata kama atahitaji -space- apate 'jiweka' sawa...inakubalika.

....am open to talk, (kumsikiliza zaidi) na kushauriana.

Tunajizuia vipi kutoleta 'matatizo tunayokumbana nayo' kutubadilisha haiba(personality) zetu ?

....Open communication. Ni vyema kipindi cha "healthy relationship" mkajadiliana Iwapo janga likitokea mnadhani hatua gani zitawasaidia...

...japokuwa huwezi tabiri janga, litapowakumba na kwakuwa tayari mna 'safety net' na maboya ya kujiokolea...haitawachukua muda ku reason na hali iliyopo.

unaweza kugundua kama umebadilika?na kama watu wako wa karibu they miss the old you?
umewahi kummis mtu wakati yupo.ila una miss his or her old personality?

.....'only if' utakuwa tayari kukubali kusikiliza na kukosolewa (na mwenyewe kujikosoa)

Mtu 'mgumu' ni yule haambiliki, asiyekubali kujitazama wala kukosolewa....kwamba anaamini HE/SHE is always right!

Kujitambua kwamba "si mkamilifu!" ni shughuli pevu kwa wengi wengineo. Mie najitambua, na sipotezi lolote ninapokosolewa.