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Jumaa, jishikilie wameanza tena!

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Raia Fulani, Jul 5, 2010.

  1. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

    #1
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    Mijini wazazi wasio na uwezo hulala na wanao chumba kimoja. Hayo ndiyo yaliyomkuta Ali na mdogo wake, Juma. USiku wa siku hiyo Ali alijifanza kulala fofofo ndipo wazazi wake wanaolala na Juma walianza kujamiiana kwa kishindo. Ali hulala juu ya kochi na alikuwa akiona yanayoendelea kitandani japo giza lilimzonga. Katika kujamiiana kule ndipo bahati mbaya walimsukuma Ali akadondoka chini. Walimbeba na kumlaza tena kitandani na walipoona kalala wakaanza tena, ndipo Ali kwa mapenzi kwa mdogo wake aliposema, "Juma, jishikilie wameanza tena!"
     
  2. Njaa

    Njaa JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 6, 2010
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    hahahahha, its nice joke although I heard long time ago! thanks Kingi
     
  3. Njaa

    Njaa JF-Expert Member

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    hahahahha, its nice joke although I heard long time ago! thanks Kingi
     
  4. Sikonge

    Sikonge JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 6, 2010
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    Kutokana na shida ya nyumba hapo Moscow, kijana Dimitr ingawa alikuwa anasoma Patrick Lumumba University, alikuwa akiishi na wazazi wake. Ila ukweli ni kuwa alikuwa akiishi na kulala nao chumba kimoja. Ila alikuwa na tabia ya ajabu sana darasani kwani alikuwa akisinzia bila mpango. Mwisho washikaji wakamuuliza kisa cha usingizi wake. Dimitr akasema kuwa "kila usiku, baba yake huwa anamuamshaamsha mara kibao na kumuuliza kama amelala........." Jamaa wakamwambia basi siku ajifanye kalala na aone nini kitafanyika.......
    Jamaa akaitwa kama tatu, mara ya nne kakausha na kusubiri nini kitafuata. Wazazi walipoona jamaa kalala, Mzee akamwambia Tatiana wake "Tatiana, Dimitr kashalala, twende zetu tukaanze kazi (bafuni). Kijana kusikia twende zetu akakurupuka..........."heee, mnaenda wapi peke yenu? Na mie pia nataka niende.............." Baba aache kutoa matusi jinsi kijana asivyo na adabu............

    Jumaa, wameanza tena walahi kula samaki..... hahahaaaa safi sana..
     
  5. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

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    sasa hiyo ni critical. Tatizo yaelekea jamaa hawana extended families angalau wamwombee Ditmir alale kwa mjomba
     
  6. katelero

    katelero JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 6, 2010
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    hahahaha
     
  7. Kamaka

    Kamaka JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 6, 2010
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    teh,teh
     
  8. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

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    hihi hihi hihiihiiii!!!
     
  9. U

    Ubungoubungo JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jul 6, 2010
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    miaka yangu ya kuhangaika wakati ndo naanza maisha, kuna jirani mmoja yeye alikuwa anatoka dodoma,...alikuwa na chumba kimoja amepenga na ana watoto wanne, wa kwanza ana miaka saba. ukimtembelea ukaona watoto wake wako wamekaa nje kwa huzuni mlango umefungwa, mida kuanzia ya saa moja hivi jioni, ujue mama na baba wanajamiiana mida ya saa moja ili saa mbili watoto waingie wale na kulala. hiyo ndo ilikuwa ratiba yao. ilikuwa inachekesha mtaa mzima walikuwa wanajua ratiba yao,..na ishara kubwa ilikuwa kuona watoto wamejikunyata nje wazazi wamefunga mlango.
     
  10. Kiranja Mkuu

    Kiranja Mkuu JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 6, 2010
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    Leo mmeamua kutoa siri zenu za ndani.
     
  11. Tonge

    Tonge JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 6, 2010
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    eheee na siku nyingine kwa bahati mbaya baba alikosea na kupitiliza mtalimbo wake ukapita kwenye nafasi ilioko kwenye kitanda cha kamba wanachokitumia kupigia game, mara mtoto akauona mtarimbo wa baba ukiwa umetokea akamuambia baba yake hiii huku baba hii huku.

    Huyu baba hakusikia akawa analala bila nguo baada ya kupiga game na huku mtoto wao mdogo akiwa katikati, mara mtoto akawa anasikia njaa na kupapasa na akakutana na mtarimbo wa baba yake badala ya nyonyo akaaza kunyonya, baba akashtuka bila kuamka na kuanza kusema mama nani hii si tumetoka kufanya sasa hivi vipi bado unataka tena halafu unavyonya vizuri siku hizi, mara akapiga bao, kushtuka kampigia dogo uhai mdomoni.
     
  12. Domhome

    Domhome JF-Expert Member

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    Am Speechless. No Comment! It's a nice joke.
     
  13. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

    #13
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    Dah! Kulala na watoto noma kwani hujifunza mengi ambayo si mazuri. Wakati niko moshi kuna dogo mmoja wa rika langu enzi hizo alianzisha mchezo wa kuchapa vitoto vya kike nami nikajifunzia huko. Ila jamaa alianza kupitiliza na kuvilawiti vitoto vya kiume. Aliipata lakini. Kumbe dogo alikuwa akiishi na dada zake wawili na wazazi wao kwenye rum moja iliyotenganishwa kwa pazia
     
  14. A

    Audax JF-Expert Member

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    Jamani ni jinsi gani inabidi tusirudie makosa kama haya tukiwa na familia-inauma saana kukuta watoto wadogo wakijifunza tabia kama hizi kutoka kwa wazazi!!
     
  15. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 8, 2010
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    Ingekuwa kijijini tungesema ni uzembe kulala na watoto, lakini mujini bwana kodi noma. Utatamani hata kutengeneza deka wazazi mlale chini na watoto juu
     
  16. Da Womanizer

    Da Womanizer JF-Expert Member

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    Hii inasikitisha sio kuchekesha aisee umaskini mbaya sana
     
  17. Mwiba

    Mwiba JF-Expert Member

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    Kuna konda mmoja alikuwa na hamu ya kuendesha gari sana sana,ila katika safari na dereva walifika kituo kimoja na kulala gesti wote kitanda kimoja ,usiku wa manane wakiwa wanakoroma kabisa na ilipokaribia alfajiri dereva alikuwa na ndoto zake zilizosababisha nanihino kusimama na yule konda nae alikuwa yumo katika ndoto za kuendesha gari ,basi akashikilia kirungu cha dereva na kuanza kubadilisha gea ,aloo !!!
     
  18. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 10, 2010
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    sasa hapa konda atajielezaje kwa dereva pindi akiamka?
     
  19. Rubi

    Rubi JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 12, 2010
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    Mmh! leo mmeamua;:heh::heh: kwi kwi kwi!
     
  20. Salha

    Salha Senior Member

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    Jul 13, 2010
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    Wakati niko mdogo tulikuwa tunakaa pale Magomeni Dar baba na mama walikuwa hawajajenga hvo tulikuwa tunapanga yvumba 3 sasa kuna jirani yetu alikuwa na yvumba 2 yaani watoto wana lala sebuleni ikwa wanatuita usiku tukachungulie mama na baba yao wanayvofanya kwakweli hapo ndo nilijua kitu fulani kinaingia wapi? maana ilikuwa cjui kabsaa.
     
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