Is It Possible?

[Nemo]

worry not mdogo wangu

ndoa has everything to do with this coz ndio chanzo cha swali la MJ1

MTM

That maybe but whether or not , what I am saying is valid or nonsensical has got nothing to do with my marital status!!When it's all said and done, If you ask me I'd say this is more to do with the basic dynamics of male/female broken relationship.

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

Some people can and some people can't! I fall in the latter group.

If we share a child and we are no longer together then I believe in maintaining a civil and cordial relationship. I don't see the need for hostilities and/or animosity if we've both resigned to the fact that we can't be together.

But a civil and cordial relationship doesn't mean hanging out together and doing things together. This just means we don't have to be fussing at each other over pointless stuff.

Just be good role models to your kid(s) and enjoy life.

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

Hii iko 50 kwa 50,inategemea ni kipi hasa kilichowafanya watengane,je ni ugonjwa ama ni mtafaruku tu katika mapenzi,kama ni ugonjwa na wote wakaridhia kuachana inawezekana kabisa wakawa friends na kushiriki masuala mengine ya kifamilia kama ulivyoainisha hapo juu,lakini kama c ugonjwa na waliachana kwa sababu za mitafaruku katika mapenzi kibongo bongo duh HAIWEZEKANI

Aksante frank,ni kweli na hii haihusiani na ugonjwa. Ni mtafaruku ambao ulitokea na zikatolewa second chances nyingi tu lakini bado hali iliendelea kuwa mbaya na more abusive mpaka upande mmoja uliposema sasa basi. So hakuna makubaliano ya pande zote mbili na upande mmoja bado una hope ya kurudiwa kwa staili ile ya "huweziishi bila mimi wewe, unanipenda sana mimi".

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

My self ni vigumu sana kuja kumpenda mwanamke yoyote yule with my all heart, nitakachojitahidi ni kumuonesha kwamba namjali na nampenda lakini whatever the case i have nothing to lose from any woman.

Dah hii confession Matola! Mbona kali sana bana! But nadhani ni ukweli as najaribu kufikiria kama ni sahihi kweli kutompenda mwingine kwa kuogopa kuumizwa tena? Sijui kama inawezekana?

 

[Little Angel]

Ni ngumu sana,kama haijawahi kukutokea ni rahisi kusema. Thru my ezperience no no noooo.
Pole sana i have been thru that now am very happy with my life.

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

...aha, ok....

hii ina tafsiri tofauti na ninayoizungumzia mimi... kwa kesi hii, cheti cha kuachana kinahitajika hapa
kila mmoja ajue haki zake, otherwise 'mtabakia' mnategeana na kila mmoja kumbebesha mwenziwe mzigo wa lawama.

kuachana kwa amani kupo dear,....zipo sababu zinazokubalisha hali hiyo,
ikiwamo mitizamo tofauti ya maisha, kiimani, au tamaduni...(fikiria nje ya boksi)

Thanx darling! Na kweli hapa cheti kinatakiwa haraka ama sivyo maafa yanawezatokea lol. Hivi si kinapatikana hata kama upande mmoja haujaridhia?

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

kuendelea kubanduana hapo sawa lakini mambo ya aut sijui nini,mie sikubali. Nalog off

Washawasha nawe bwana, asa unabanduanaje wakati kule ulishalog off??

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

Ni ngumu sana,kama haijawahi kukutokea ni rahisi kusema. Thru my ezperience no no noooo.
Pole sana i have been thru that now am very happy with my life.

Little Angel jamani naomba desa mwenzio maana kweli naona kama inanikera sana kiasi cha kuwa ni mtu wa hacra kila sekunde!

 

[Little Angel]

washawasha nawe bwana, asa unabanduanaje wakati kule ulishalog off??

hivi unaanzaje kwanza? Mbona ni kitu kigumu sana! Anyway wengine wana mioyo tofauti.

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

Some people can and some people can't! I fall in the latter group.

If we share a child and we are no longer together then I believe in maintaining a civil and cordial relationship. I don't see the need for hostilities and/or animosity if we've both resigned to the fact that we can't be together.

But a civil and cordial relationship doesn't mean hanging out together and doing things together. This just means we don't have to be fussing at each other over pointless stuff.

Just be good role models to your kid(s) and enjoy life.

Kama mmeridhia wote wawili kuwa you cant be together anymore. But kama mmoja bado ana yale majigambo ya mie najua kuoa tu, kuacha sijui ilhali bado anafanya madudu, bado anaabuse halafu anakuja kujisafisha kwa ndugu kwa maneno na pretendencies kibao bedo kuna haja ya hiyo cordial relationship?? Huo ucivil unakuja vipi hapo??

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

hivi unaanzaje kwanza? Mbona ni kitu kigumu sana! Anyway wengine wana mioyo tofauti.

lttle angel msome MTM vizuri utaelewa kwa nini to some ni rahisi kurudi na kuzichojoa kisha kuondoka tena.

 

[Bishanga]

MJ1,ahsante kwa uzi huu.
Nikupe my personal experince.Nimeoa na kuzaa na wanawake kadhaa,wengine wali go on kuolewa,wengine hadi leo ma living single.Wote ni marafiki zangu,sherehe,misiba kwangu wanakuja,kwao nakwenda na sioni tatizo hata kidogo.
Angalizo:Mwanamke ukizaa naye mka break,leeni mtoto mliozaa lakini usilale naye,utaharibu.

 

[Little Angel]

little angel jamani naomba desa mwenzio maana kweli naona kama inanikera sana kiasi cha kuwa ni mtu wa hacra kila sekunde!

najua ni kweli lazima upate hasira,for me it took like a year hasira kupungua maana ilikua zaidi ya hasira,kuna wakati nilikua nalia tu maana ckua na plan ya kua single parent. I thought i lost the half of my life. But pia ckua radhi kuendelea na mtu ambaye daily ananihurt moyo wangu. Amekuwa king'ang'anizi for three years mpaka ameamua ku give up. Just be strong and firm kwenye decision my dear.

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

Mdogo wangu MJ1,

Hii issue ni nzito kidogo ila inaelezeka...ingawa si rahisi ki hivyo!

Ninavyojua mimi kuna kutengana (wenzetu hapa wanatoa talaka moja au talaka rejea) na kuachana. Kama ni hali ya kutengana tu, watu wanategemea kuwa wahusika watajipa nafasi ya kutosha kutafakari kama wanaweza kulianzisha tena au ndo things fall apart...Katika hicho kipindi, nafasi yoyote ile inayoweza kupatikana, iwe kupitia kwa mtoto au accidents ambazo zinawapa nafasi ya kukutana na kuangaliana usoni at 180 degrees inaweza kuwa chanzo cha mambo mengine mazito......Hapa nashauri mwanamke awe mwangalifu sana kwa sababu kumwingiza mkenge ex-GF au ex-wife ni rahisi sana kama vile kusukuma mlevi wa gongo!!

Kama watu wameachana, tena katika mazingira ya kiafrika basi sioni kama ni possible kuwa na ukaribu wowote...Nadhani hata mambo ya kulea watoto inabidi yawe kwenye makaratasi na siyo kupitia dialogue za kila mara....Mtakuwa mnatafuta au kuonge ongea nini wakati kila mtu keshaanza maisha yake binafsi with or without a new partner??

Sorry kama sijaeleweka...

Babu DC!!

Babu umeeleweka zaidi ya kueleweka Babu aksante sana kwa kulifafanua vizuri. Hii ni kweli kabisa na bila kupenda inaangukia kwenye kundi la kwanza and hapo pa kuwa vulnerable ndipo mmjukuu wako ninapojikinga napo. Yes tunakuita kutengana but unaona kabisa hakuna dalili ya kurudiana kwa upande mmoja wakati upande mwingine unatake things for granted eti once married, you are married. Ni upande mmoja tu unaoona hakuna future huko mbele wakati upande mwingine unaona kuwa hata hilo giza kwake ni haki yake. hautaki kukubali kuacha simply because anakomoa! So unakuta anakimbilia kujishow off kwa ndugu kuwa anakupenda sana basi tu ni wewe ndie unayelichakachua penzi lake tena mwanaume mzima akashtakie uwongo na machozi juu wakati kwako anaact wierdly.

Kusema ukweli babu hata sielewi natamani nikamate ndugu wanaomtetea nitandike viboko kwa sababu hawako tayari kuopen up macho yao waone the reality.

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

najua ni kweli lazima upate hasira,for me it took like a year hasira kupungua maana ilikua zaidi ya hasira,kuna wakati nilikua nalia tu maana ckua na plan ya kua single parent. I thought i lost the half of my life. But pia ckua radhi kuendelea na mtu ambaye daily ananihurt moyo wangu. Amekuwa king'ang'anizi for three years mpaka ameamua ku give up. Just be strong and firm kwenye decision my dear.

Aksante kwa hii post mamito.

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

MJ1,ahsante kwa uzi huu.
Nikupe my personal experince.Nimeoa na kuzaa na wanawake kadhaa,wengine wali go on kuolewa,wengine hadi leo ma living single.Wote ni marafiki zangu,sherehe,misiba kwangu wanakuja,kwao nakwenda na sioni tatizo hata kidogo.
Angalizo:Mwanamke ukizaa naye mka break,leeni mtoto mliozaa lakini usilale naye,utaharibu.

Aksante Bishanga kwa hii experience yako. ninajifunza

 

[Little Angel]

hahahahaha...unastushwa na hilo tu,

kwa taarifa yako, mwanamume (tena wa kiafrika) akimwacha mwanamke anatamani kumwona akiwa kichaa anaokota makopo au amefulia hadi chawa wanagawana vipande vipande vya mwili wake... That way anaamini kweli mungu alikuwa amekutoa kwake ila kwa ujeuri wako sasa unaonja joto la jiwe!! Habari ya watoto haipo kabisa kichwani mwake linapokuja suala la kumfikiria mtalaka wake!!

Mwanamume aliyekuacha akikuona unatanua tena na dume jingine, anatamani akaazime bastola ili asione tena hicho kitu ambacho kinampa pressure kama vile amebakiza dakika 10 kuaga dunia!!

Mwanamume kiumbe tofauti na mnachoona kinatembea njiani....kuwa makini na chukua hatua!!

very true with my ex. Mafanikio yangu yanamuuma sana,yaani anatamani ningekuwa chini au cna lolote kabisa. Lakini mumgu ni mwema. I have enough for me and my kid. Na inamuuma kwakua i have never asked for anything from him.

 

[Bishanga]

Aksante Bishanga kwa hii experience yako. ninajifunza

MJ1 nilichojifunza mimi katika maisha ni kuwa kuachana na mtu does not necessarily mean mmekuwa maadui ,unless mwenzio akufanyie kitu kibaya sana kama kukupeleka jela.Katika kuachana initially huwa kuna temper,with time huwa mna cool off na kuanza hata kuchekana.Kuna mwanamke mmoja nilikuwa naishi naye tukagombana akakomba kila kitu mpaka mapazia,siku hizi huwa namtania na kumuuliza hivi chu....i zangu uliziuza soko lipi la mitumba? Anacheeeeeeka na kusema alizitia kiberiti.Mkizaa ndo kabisa mtake msitake mtaongea tu na mtoto kwenu atakuwa bond ya kudumu.

 

[The Finest]

There are many factors that will dictate the possibility of lingering friendship. There can also be character issues in play that make you step back and say. "I really don't like this person" once you remove the intimacy. It can also be too painful to be around someone after a breakup, but even long lasting friendships can be broken beyond repair in certain situations. And of course, sometimes you don't get to make the choice.

 

[Dena Amsi]

MJ1,

Hii thread sijui imenipita pitaje aisee.

Haya mambo ya kuachana yana mambo mengi sana
maana kuna wengine mnatengana (upande mmoja unakuwa haujaridhika)
haya ndo yanaweza kutokea. But all in all mie siwezi kuruhusu haya mambo
yanitokee maana mmezaa na inawezekana mmeishi pamoja mnajuana in and out
huyo asiyeridhika na hayo maamuzi atakuja na kujileta leta karibu ili mradi tu
muendelee na mawasiliano tushaachana ya nini kufatana fatana kila mtu ashike time yake
eti anakuja kwenye harusi, msiba sijui sherehe gani inahuu aendelee na mambo yake

Kuna mambo mengine mie huwa yananichosha na kunitia hasira sometimes
MJ1 piga stop haraka hiyo kitu asikuzoee zoee alah!
Watu wengine hawabebeki kabisa maana unambeba halafu anakukata na wembe mgongoni.

Kiukweli usikaribishe hayo mahusiano ya karibu kiviile kama anaulizia mtoto wake mara moja moja si
mbaya lakini sio kujiweka weka karibu na familia yako anataka??? Mie naona anatafuta kuonewa
huruma na wewe uambiwe mwenzio mbona bado anakupenda na ni mtu mzuri hebu msamehe
Hana lolote nakwambia huyo. Chuna kwa mbali

DA