JF Chit-Chats and Jokes

General Chat, Talk about anything that falls under no category on the board, but remember FOLLOW THE RULES!
mashindano ya dunia(kulala na mabinti warembo)vyumba vipo 100 kila chumba kina binti mmoja chumba cha 101 ni bafu na choo...ukimaliza kimoja unahamia,kingine..majaji wana system inayoonyesha kila...
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One of the biggest University in U.S.A they invented a machine that can catches thieves for the accuracy of 78% . They took it out to different countries in supermarkets for a test. In U.S.A...
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Man: Is there any way for long life? Dr: Get married. Man: Will it help? Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come. ------------ --------- --------- ---- Why do couples hold hands...
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"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet...
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The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the surrogate father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm...
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There were two high school sweethearts who went out together for four years in high school and were both virgins and enjoyed losing their virginity with each other in 10th grade. When they...
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A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus,went up on the footpath,and stopped centimeters from a shop...
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Pastor: 'If there is anybody here that does not want this couple to be Joined together in holy matrimony, he or she should speak out now.' A man from the extreme of the church stood up and...
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A guy donated blood to his girlfrind. When they broke up,he wanted his blood back. The girl threw a bloody sanitary pad at him and said, 'I'll pay you in monthly instalment.'...
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Fill the blanks with YES or No ____I DONT HAVE A BRAIN ____I DONT HAVE SENSE. ____I AM STUPID NO HURRY,U CAN THINK WHOLE DAY AND NIGHT.
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While walking down the street, Dubya was struck by a large wheel of cheese that fell out of SwissAir flight 19. Sadly. George does not make it and his soul arrives in heaven and he is met by...
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From a strictly mathematical viewpoint: What Equals 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been in...
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1. Never wake up early: Keep stretching and turning in bed until you get too hungry to continue dozing. If there are no bedbugs, why hurry toget up? 2. Never plan how to spend your money...
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A man was sitting reading his paper when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan. "What was that for?" the man asked. The wife replied "That was for the piece of paper with the name...
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Jamaa 1 alikuwa kila siku anaota panya wanacheza mpira akaenda kwa mganga...ili aziondoe hizo ndoto.Mganga akampa dawa ambayo alitakiwa anywe leo kama sharti ili ndoto ziishe. Jamaa akamwambia...
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Mashine ya kungundua wezi ilijaribiwa marekani & kwingineko.Marekani ndani ya dakika 30 ilinasa wezi 500,zimbabwe dakika 20 wezi laki 20,Kenya dakika 10 wezi Milioni 2.Tanzania ndani ya dakika 5...
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A grade 3 child asked his teacher. Child: Sorry Sir, does honey have legs? Teacher: No, but why asking such question? Child: Because every night I always hear my daddy saying, "honey stretch...
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....and still score points with the Wife A guy wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of...
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Marriage - Part I Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: 'I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I...
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