QUESTION: Why did the chicken cross the road? KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side. PLATO: For the greater good. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads. KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability. OBAMA: Because, YES IT CAN! MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR: ... I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives being called into question. MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was. OPRAH/ TYRA: Why does a chicken cross a road? Was it molested while still a chick? I mean, what kind of upbringing did it have? We need to invite the chicken to a share with us what happened OSAMA BIN LADEN: This was an unprovoked act by the infidels and zionist forces, we will avenge with suicide bombers!! GEORGE W. BUSH (2): The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here. ANY KENYAN POLITICIAN: "From which tribe is the chicken? Our community has been marginalized for far too long others have had their chance and it is now the turn of our chicken to eat!" EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference. BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature. ISAAC NEWTON: Any chicken in the universe shall always cross a road perpendicularly to the side of the road, and in an infinitely long straight line at uniform speed, unless the chicken stops due to an unbalanced reactive force in the opposite direction of the chicken's motion NELSON MANDELA: Never again, will the chicken be questioned for crossing the road. This is an ideal for which I am prepared to die. ROBERT MUGABE: For all of these years the road has been owned by the white farmers, the poor underprivileged chicken has waited too long for that road to be given to him and now he is crossing it in force with his fellow war veteran chickens. We intend taking over this road and giving it to the roadless chickens so that they can cross it without fear of retribution from Britain who promised money to institute road reform. We will not stop until all roadless chickens have roads to cross and the freedom to cross them. RAILA ODINGA: Both me and President Kibaki had been telephoned about the chicken. Si sisi iko na demokrasia na tunataka wacha kuku apite, sio? Si kuku tosha?! It is even in the agreement between me and Kibaki. Lazima ipite, nimesema hivyo hii asubuhi. I have exclusive powers on this! EMILIO MWAI KIBAKI: Kuku ilivuka pale pale, ikienda huko huko........ na hilo ndio jambo la maana ....hakuna mambo ingine!...hakunaaaa .....na tutakataa namna gani ati kuku isivuke barabara ...hatuweziii ..na hao wanaendelea kuongea mambo ya kukuuu....ni wapumbavuuu. .. .....mavi ya hiyo kuku!!! That is unconstitutional. Na irundi kule itokako.