Vituko mitandaoni. Tupia chako

[Swahili AI]

 

[antimatter]

No matter how ugly you are, once you are well loaded with money, women will always find something cute on you like: "Aww, he has a cute Forehead" 😊

 

[Swahili AI]

 

[Swahili AI]

 

[antimatter]

Having sex with a Girl who doesn't Scream is like watching a Soccer Match without commentators😊

 

[antimatter]

They Say When Your Palm Is Itching, You Gonna Get Money..
If your Foot is Itching you gonna get new shoes or a trip..
If your Lips are itching, you gonna get kissed .
If your Ear is Itching, there is a Gossip .
If your Private Part is itching, please, please.. don't fool yourself.... Go and Bath😊

 

[antimatter]

Four guys are at a high school reunion and one of them goes to the restroom. The other guys start talking about how successful their sons are:
Guy 1: My son is so successful he owns a car dealership and just gave his best friend a ferarri.
Guy 2: That's nothing, my son owns an airline and just gave his best friend a private jet.
Guy 3: Well, my son is more successful than that, he owns an architecture firm and just gave his best friend a castle.
Guy 4 walks out the bathroom and walks over to the other three guys..
Guy 4: Hey guys what are you talking about?
Guy 1: Ooh, we are talking about how successful our sons are.
Guy 4: Well, my son is a gay stripper!
Guy 2: Oh sorry.. You must be disappointed with what he's done with his life.
Guy 4: Actually he's doing well for himself, he just got a Ferrari, a jet and a castle from his three boyfriends..

 

[Mshana Jr]

Kuelekea 2025

 

[antimatter]

A dad buys a lie detector Robot that slaps you If you lie..

Dad: Son, where were you during school hours?
Son: At school. The Robot slaps the son.
Son: Okay, I was watching KungFu Panda! The Robot slaps his son again.
Son: Okay I was watching violent movies!
Dad: What?! When I was your age I never watched those kind of movies! The Robot slaps the dad.
Mom: Hahaha,.. after all, he is your son. The Robot slaps the mom😁

 

[antimatter]

Kuelekea 2025View attachment 2354230

🤣🤣

 

[antimatter]

I was in a taxi today and a traffic police officer stopped the driver but failed to get anything wrong to get the normal bribe..
Then he asked, "Have you registered your Sim Card?"😁

 

[antimatter]

When two girls are fighting over you, my brother, I advise you to watch the fight to the end.
Then marry the loser, because you just can't afford to have Mike Tyson as a wife.😁

 

[antimatter]

You know you're ugly when you get handed the camera every time they need a group photo..😁

 

[mteule]

You know you're ugly when you get handed the camera every time they need a group photo..😁

Sarcastic indeed.

 

[antimatter]

Some Grandpas can really lie..

Grandpa chatting with his grandchild.
Grandpa : My grandchild, Do you know I used to travel a lot during my youthful age; I went to the UK, USA, Australia, Canada, Brazil and many more.
Grandchild: Wow, Grandpa!! U must know Geography very well then.
Grandpa : As for Geography, I stayed there for 3 years!

 

[Soma Tena]

Jana nilivyotoka kanisani nilijifunza mengi sana,nikafikiri sana jinsi Mungu wetu alivyokuwa na upendo na huruma.

Je akitokea akamsamehe shetani,sijui itakuaje?

 

[antimatter]

Au nikuacheView attachment 2354279

🤣🤣
Unaweza kata moto!

 

[Living Pablo]

View attachment 2353267

😁😁

 

[antimatter]

Examining a female patient brutally beaten by her husband,
The Doctor tells her : "Your heart, lungs, pulse, BP are fine...
Now, let me see that cute little thing of yours which gets you ladies into all kinds of trouble"
The woman immediately starts taking off her skirt and underwear...
The shocked Doctor says : "No! No! Please! Put your clothes on. Just show me your tongue😁😁

 

[Swahili AI]

kwa njaa hili, anakataaje?