P wa ukweli
Member
- Jan 15, 2011
- 8
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tehe tehe teheee! Hapo dingi huna swali, maneno lazima yakuishe.. Unakuwa mdogooooo!!
Jamaa mmoja alimkuta mwanae wa miaka 6 akiwa anawaza,akamuuliza unawaza nn?yule mtoto akajibu"ninataka kuoa,"yule baba akashtuka na akamuuliza,"kwa umri utamuoa nani?"akajibu si bibi yangu.yule baba akamjibu,"utamuoa aje mama yangu mzazi?(kwa ukali)."yule mtoto akamwambia mbona mimi sijakuchimba mikwara japo umemuoa mama yangu mzazi?
teeh,teh,teeeh NimeipendaMtoto kaamka usiku akakuta wazazi wanafanya mambo yetu yale. akauliza baba unafanya nini? baba, namjaza mamayako petroli. mtoto, basi mwambie apunguze kutembea ovyo anamaliza mafuta bure maana na anko kilasiku anamjazia mchana ukiondoka.
Teacher:'nyumbani kwenu nani mdogo kuliko wote? Mwanafunzi akajibu:Mama. Teacher:ki vipi? Mwanafunzi:chupi yake mpaka leo anavuliwa na baba!
hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa jamani leo kazi ipo apa khaaaaaaBasi pata na hii.....
This seem fair what do u think? Husband & his wife agreed dat anytym dey wnt 2 v sex, dey wil cal it 'Fone call' so dat d kids wil nt knw. 1day,d husband was horny & snt his son 2 tell his mother dat he wnts 2 make a fone call.Mother replied: Tell ur father,d network is bad 2day,father says: tel ur Mother dat if dere is no network @ home I wil go 2 d 'public fone' wife replies: tell ur father dat if he dares go to a ''Public fone'' den I wil open a call center
Dogo janja alirudi kutoka shule asubuhi sana.
Baba: kwanini umerudi mapema hivi? hebu rudi shule huko
Dogo: Sitaki mwalimu wa hesabu kanirudisha
Baba: Kwanini? Dogo: ameniuliza 2 X 3 ni ngapi? nikamwambia ni 6
Baba: sawa kabisa
Dogo: Halafu akaniuliza 3 X2 ni ngapi?
Baba: Mwalimu f#la nini? ukamjibu ngapi?
Dogo: Hivyo hivyo (f#la)
A Tourist in Kilimanjaro had a friend as an interpreter by the name of Mr.Makeke. When in a small restaurant in town interpretation English to Kiswahili went like this:
Tourist: Do you have vegetables here.
Makeke: Mnavyo vijimeza hapa.
Waiter: Vijimeza vidogo hatuna.
Makeke: No sir, they don't have.
Tourist: OK, fine, do you have hot dogs.
Makeke: Sawa, je mnao mbwa wa moto.
Waiter: Loh! Bwana we, hatupiki mbwa hapa.
Makeke: They don't cook here
Tourist: What type of snacks do you have here?
Makeke: Aina ngapi ya nyoka mnao hapa,
Waiter: We bwana we hapa hatupiki aina yeyote ya nyoka, mwache akale nyumbani kwao.
Makeke: They don't cook any type of snacks here, maybe you can go back and eat at home.
Tourist: OK, at least give us a cocktail juice.
Makeke: OK, tupatie hata juisi ya mkia wa jogoo.
Waiter: Hebu tokeni na bangi lenu hapa, tena sasa hivi kabla sijakasirika.
Makeke: Lets get out of here, I think this man is crazy!