Do's and Donts on a Date (Kwanini baada ya 1st date unapotezewaaaa!)

[Prisoner 46664]

mbona wapoteza pumzi zako bure!!!! vp uko poa lakini???

lol...'
walau ngoja nizilete hapa,
sina neno sana Ciello,
U mzima wewe??

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

Nyani Ngabu
A friend said : love has a reacher and a settler!
a reacher holds on to something bigger/higher than they'd normally deserve..
a settler settles for something less than they deserve

akikuomba second date...she is reaching!..ni mwanzo wa kum-take for granted.

These things don't follow any principle. You can court her and all and end up taking her for granted.

 

[Nicole]

mi niko poa...naona unatoa somo kwa zamadm...hahahahah

lol...'
walau ngoja nizilete hapa,
sina neno sana Ciello,
U mzima wewe??

 

[Zinduna]

Mbwembwe zote hizo za nini, kwani naomba kazi?
Mie na behave kama kawaida yangu na siji pretend wala nini.

Shoga lara 1 upoooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

Mbwembwe zote hizo za nini, kwani naomba kazi?
Mie na behave kama kawaida yangu na siji pretend wala nini.

Shoga lara 1 upoooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mbona wewe na wenzako mnaogopa kuniroga?

 

[lara 1]

hahahah baelezee baelewe..wanaplay hard to get wakati men wenye futures za ukwee wako wachache....sio twa-ask 4a second date bana....waache waplay hide and seek while hawana guts!!!!

Hahaaaaaaaa! Umri wenyewe huu usioneshe ushirikiano! Utaula wa chuya kwa uvivu wa kuchambua!

 

[Prisoner 46664]

mi niko poa...naona unatoa somo kwa zamadm...hahahahah

Ha haa,
si unajua tena lara's lounge hii..
mdada na vimada vyake vya kichokozi..
asee nimeimiss sana baridi btw,,,vipi haijazidi leo?

 

[Zinduna]

Mbona wewe na wenzako mnaogopa kuniroga?

Ngoja niongee na gwiji la uchawi mzabzab akutupie jini Mzabwamzabwa

 

[Prisoner 46664]

Mbwembwe zote hizo za nini, kwani naomba kazi?
Mie na behave kama kawaida yangu na siji pretend wala nini.

Shoga lara 1 upoooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Zinduna wa Tanga,,,mambo?
Kuna jamaa hapa ameomba usogeze laptop mbele kidogo..

 

[lara 1]

Nyani Ngabu
A friend said : love has a reacher and a settler!
a reacher holds on to something bigger/higher than they'd normally deserve..
a settler settles for something less than they deserve

akikuomba second date...she is reaching!..ni mwanzo wa kum-take for granted.

Haahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Mbona huku mbali sanaaaa! Ishu ni kuwa you were kind to me na mimi im just returning the favour! Unaweza jiona babu kubwaaaaaaa kumbe mwenzio kakuona kawaida sanaaaa! Sasa ukileta u her majesty ndo unampoteza kabisaaaa!

Bora uwe polite aone japo kabinti chenyewe kabaya ila kasweet! Huwezi jua mwenzio amekugrade vipi! Jst follow your heart unachotaka!

 

[Prisoner 46664]

Haahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Mbona huku mbali sanaaaa! Ishu ni kuwa you were kind to me na mimi im just returning the favour! Unaweza jiona babu kubwaaaaaaa kumbe mwenzio kakuona kawaida sanaaaa! Sasa ukileta u her majesty ndo unampoteza kabisaaaa!

Bora uwe polite aone japo kabinti chenyewe kabaya ila kasweet! Huwezi jua mwenzio amekugrade vipi! Jst follow your heart unachotaka!

ha ha ha haaaaaaa....
Confidence always wins...
So say whatever!...

 

[kuberwa]

Keep your hands where I can see them not in your nose/mouth, not on your fly.

Ndo wapi huko? heheheh

 

[Ninaweza]

Acha ubishi kuna watu wanaboa sanaaa! Ukianza kitu anakukata mid sentence na kumalizia! Sasa mwenzie anakuwa anamsikiliza usiku kucha kama radio! It kills a mans ego! Anaju hapo hata kwa bed ni Woman On Top Mwanzo mwisho!

huyu mwanamke ana akili/busara za kujenga familia. Ana heri mme wako!

 

[lara 1]

ha ha ha haaaaaaa....
Confidence always wins...
So say whatever!...

Hahahaaaaaaaaaaa! Ki date umebahatisha once per year alafu ulete comfidence!!!!!!! Ndo usipomuona tena utumie hizo hizo kusaka mwengine!

 

[kibavu]

Wakubwa zangu shikamooni!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Peopleeeeeeeeeeeees!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Haahahaaaaaaaaaaa! Hizi ni mada za Mtambuzi ila niko kwenye refresher course ya haya mambo, bado nimepewa Yellow Card, mwenzenu sasa kwa kujua dalili ya mvua mawingu ndo najikumbushia the basics za game, manake its a long time na times zimechange, definataley rules na tactics zimechange pia! Sasa kama na wewe Senior Bachelor alafu ukienda a date na mtu inageuka dealbreaker! Hataki tena kukuona! LOLEST! Kribu turefresh ili kumaster the game!

1.Choice ya Sehemu! Ukiwa unaenda on a date na new partner mara nyingi mpe the benefit of the doubt zigo la kuchagua mahala mtupie yeye! Ila likikuangukia ndo kimbembe kinapoanzia!!! Inabidi ucheze kwa akili kwelikweli mnake Ukipick a Cheap cheap place ili asikuone expensive unajishaua atakuona na wewe very cheap! Hapo ujue treatment za future zitakuwa influenced na hilo! Ukimuagiza pochi unaletewa La K/Koo si huna makuuu!!!!!!! Hata wanaume pia ukinipeleka a cheap joint nakukwepa kama ukoma! Akhaaaaaaaa! Mambo gani njoo conner bar! Na ukipick expensive place pia atakuona wa gharama zisizo na msingi! Dawa hapo ni kusaka joints kali bt affordable! Hapo lazima akukubali!

2.Comeversation/Maongezi hili ndo shughuli pevuuu! Epuka kusimulia mambo yako ya kazini coz its non of my damn business! Mention ya Xs wako ni deal breaker, usithubutu kutoa kitubio chako na list yako kuazia aliekutoa bikra! Damn! Its Boring!!!! Usimuulize mwenzio mambo binafsi, kama akitaka atasema mwenyewe! Mambo ya familia hayanihusu coz sijakwambia kuwa nitakuoa/utanioa!!!!!!!! Jaribu tu kuongelea vitu general unapenda nini? Miziki gani unaifeel?, Wapi unapenda kwenda na mambo kama hayo ili ujue next time unampeleka wapi! Historia tumeicha shule na mwenzie fizikia!!!!!!!!!

3.Kula Msosi!!!!!!!!! Hahahaaaaaa! Hapa ndo kazi ipo! Ukila sana kosaaa! Ulafi hautakiwi! Na ukila kidogo unamboa mwenzio bili yote anayoicover ndo ule chips tatu na robo soda!!!!!!!? Pia ulaji nao ishu!!!! Umezoea kwenu unatafuna kama bablish mmichakula mdomoni unaleta story!!!!!!! Aaaaagggghhhhh!!!!!!! Table Manner wakuuu!!!! Ila zikizidi nazo ishu! Kuku unamla kwa Umma!!!!! Aaaaaaaah! Hata kama unaweza, mwenzio siwezi atii!!!!!! Unaniaibisha! Ndo muwe wajanja kuagiza vyakula rahisi kama Bbarbaque/mishikaki, fillets!!!!!! Sio kuku wa kienyeji!!!!!

4.Unywaji wa pombe! Sio vibaya kutotumia alcohol ila Soda/Juice is definately a dont!! Kabisaaa! Huko ni kuleta nzi na nyuki kwa meza!!!! Kunywa japo Malta, Bavaria, Redbull,Apple Maltizer na the likes! Kama kwenye company Mupe! Mruke! Mupe! Mupe! itakukuta! Soda is a mood killer! Na wale wenzangu na mie kuagiza Vodca! Tequila shots double double, Konya!, Sijui vishots gani huko unaagiza coctail kabisaa ya liquor na mikombinenga ya hatari!!!!!!! Khaaaaaaaa! Mpaka mtu anakuogopa achia mbali hilo Bili na shoti utayotia! Wanaume pia jianaume levi linatisha mwenzangu!!!!!!! Take it slow!!!! Kunywa redds au Dompo/Msalaba/Altar wine ile ki priest zaidi!!!!!!!!!!

5.Jifanye mshamba!!!!!!! Kaa umsikilize mwenzio kidogo!!! Sio akianzisha mada ushaidaka juu juu!!!!! Kila kitu wakijua wewe! Hata kama wajua play stupid ili mwenzio apate comfidence ya kuongea na kumake comversation! Kila jambo walijua hadi ya Napoleon Hill wayajua wewe, si ya Dan Brown hata ya Lyod Nchunga wa Yanga pia wayajua!!!! Khaaaaaaaaaaa! We mwana weee! Sitoki tena na wewe!!!!!! Mie pia najua mambo mengi ila nanyuti tu kimyaa japo akinichakachulia na uongo au kitu kasikia anajifanya ankijua nacheka tu moyoni! Sio kumshushua hapo hapo nirudishe chenchi!!!!!!!!!

6. Malalamiko na Machungu yako ya nyuma hapo si mahala pake atiiii! Oh! Mi nimetendwa sana, sina bahati, wenzangu wameolewa! Hai huuuuuuuuu! Kabisaaaaaaaa! "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."-Abraham Lincon! We ongelea present na future! Nini unapendelea! Malengo yako maishani ni nini! Vitu entertaining kama hivo!!!!! Sio wajfunguaaaaa hadi walia katikati!!!! Looooh!!!!!!

7.Kumsifia Bwana/Bibi wako wa zamani!!!!!!!! Kama wa maana sana huyo bwana/bibi hapa tunafanya nini? Si umfate huko aliko? Alikuwa ananijali, ni mkarimu, ana upendo sasa unachotaka nije nifukie mzimu wake ama!!!!!! Hai huuuuuuu kabisaaaa! Hata usimzungumzie kabisaaa atakutilieni gundu tu kidate kizima!

8.Body Language! Unakaa nyonde nyonde kama mgonjwa wa kifaduro au pepo punda kisaaaaa! Uonekane mpole usie na makuu! Khaaaaaaaaa!!!!! Tbasamu dada! Onesha wainjoy the company, cheka unenepe! mziki ukipigwa cheza, anzisha maongezi sio kujibu mmmmh! Kama katoto kumbe zeee! ALAS! Ila usizidishe bandugu manake kukwambia cheza ndo upande juu ya spika na kushake the booty! Mi simoooo!

9.Mavazi! umealikwa vaa kwa staha ila sio kishamba!!!!! Vaa kwa staha manake usitoke kama changu anaenda mawindoni!! Vaa supra zako kali za kisasa ila zisitiri mwili sio chupi lote nje!!!!!!!!! Au wapiga midosho ya kitenge au nguo za kishamba hadi mwenzio akikuona anaanza kufadhaika!!!!! Vaa gauni lako sexy safi au jeans na tshirt bomba kabisaa! Mambo ya ufashionista colour blocking siju colour combo unaweza kukimbiwa!!!!!!! Sijui green, purple, yellow kama clown ndo wajiona bonge ya fashionista!!!!! Wigi kama Nick Minaji anaperform! Khaaaaaa! Na wananume modo imekubanaa hata ukijamba ushuzi unabaki humohumo hadi uvue hio modo utahisiwa si riziki bureeeeee! Kikatu Papa Mukulu ana afadhali kilivochongoka!!!!!

10. Omba netx date!!!!! Ndio! Ukizubaa unakufa kifo cha mende miguu juu!!!!!! We sikilizia ukiona hasemi jilipue! Nakualika kwangu next time !!!!! Au waonaje tukienda sehemu flani jmosi ijayao? Na mambo kama hayo! Ondoka ukijua kuonana tena kupo specified! Take the lead!!!! Sio kujifanya wewe hapo unapendwa saaaana na mwenzio ndo kijakazi wako kukualika kila siku! Time hela zako kuwa chopped!

Ni hayo tu! Natumai mbavu zenu zimenyooka na stress zimewaisha kabisaaa! (JF IS NEVER BORING!!!!!)

Nimependa hoja namba tisa (9) kuna mtu alikuJa kunitembelea jumapili moja mchana kweupe mwenyewe katinga TENITE siku hizi wanayaita madela wenyewe. Haikua dating as such lakini hata zile hisia zilizokua zimeanza kujengeka kwake zikazima ghafla bin vupu na hata kumsindikiza nikaona kazi. PAMBA MUHIMU, si LAZIMA UVAE KAMA DOKII AKIWA ANAIGIZA LAKINI PIA SIO UNAVAA KAMA VILE UNAENDA KWENYE MASHINDANO YA MISS BANTU! UTAKIMBIWA!!!!!!!!!

 

[mzabzab]

Ngoja niongee na gwiji la uchawi mzabzab akutupie jini Mzabwamzabwa

uchawi niujulie wapi mie mzee wa kugegeda...fani yangu wowowo, mapaja na papuchi

 

[kibavu]

Wakubwa zangu shikamooni!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Peopleeeeeeeeeeeees!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Haahahaaaaaaaaaaa! Hizi ni mada za Mtambuzi ila niko kwenye refresher course ya haya mambo, bado nimepewa Yellow Card, mwenzenu sasa kwa kujua dalili ya mvua mawingu ndo najikumbushia the basics za game, manake its a long time na times zimechange, definataley rules na tactics zimechange pia! Sasa kama na wewe Senior Bachelor alafu ukienda a date na mtu inageuka dealbreaker! Hataki tena kukuona! LOLEST! Kribu turefresh ili kumaster the game!

1.Choice ya Sehemu! Ukiwa unaenda on a date na new partner mara nyingi mpe the benefit of the doubt zigo la kuchagua mahala mtupie yeye! Ila likikuangukia ndo kimbembe kinapoanzia!!! Inabidi ucheze kwa akili kwelikweli mnake Ukipick a Cheap cheap place ili asikuone expensive unajishaua atakuona na wewe very cheap! Hapo ujue treatment za future zitakuwa influenced na hilo! Ukimuagiza pochi unaletewa La K/Koo si huna makuuu!!!!!!! Hata wanaume pia ukinipeleka a cheap joint nakukwepa kama ukoma! Akhaaaaaaaa! Mambo gani njoo conner bar! Na ukipick expensive place pia atakuona wa gharama zisizo na msingi! Dawa hapo ni kusaka joints kali bt affordable! Hapo lazima akukubali!

2.Comeversation/Maongezi hili ndo shughuli pevuuu! Epuka kusimulia mambo yako ya kazini coz its non of my damn business! Mention ya Xs wako ni deal breaker, usithubutu kutoa kitubio chako na list yako kuazia aliekutoa bikra! Damn! Its Boring!!!! Usimuulize mwenzio mambo binafsi, kama akitaka atasema mwenyewe! Mambo ya familia hayanihusu coz sijakwambia kuwa nitakuoa/utanioa!!!!!!!! Jaribu tu kuongelea vitu general unapenda nini? Miziki gani unaifeel?, Wapi unapenda kwenda na mambo kama hayo ili ujue next time unampeleka wapi! Historia tumeicha shule na mwenzie fizikia!!!!!!!!!

3.Kula Msosi!!!!!!!!! Hahahaaaaaa! Hapa ndo kazi ipo! Ukila sana kosaaa! Ulafi hautakiwi! Na ukila kidogo unamboa mwenzio bili yote anayoicover ndo ule chips tatu na robo soda!!!!!!!? Pia ulaji nao ishu!!!! Umezoea kwenu unatafuna kama bablish mmichakula mdomoni unaleta story!!!!!!! Aaaaagggghhhhh!!!!!!! Table Manner wakuuu!!!! Ila zikizidi nazo ishu! Kuku unamla kwa Umma!!!!! Aaaaaaaah! Hata kama unaweza, mwenzio siwezi atii!!!!!! Unaniaibisha! Ndo muwe wajanja kuagiza vyakula rahisi kama Bbarbaque/mishikaki, fillets!!!!!! Sio kuku wa kienyeji!!!!!

4.Unywaji wa pombe! Sio vibaya kutotumia alcohol ila Soda/Juice is definately a dont!! Kabisaaa! Huko ni kuleta nzi na nyuki kwa meza!!!! Kunywa japo Malta, Bavaria, Redbull,Apple Maltizer na the likes! Kama kwenye company Mupe! Mruke! Mupe! Mupe! itakukuta! Soda is a mood killer! Na wale wenzangu na mie kuagiza Vodca! Tequila shots double double, Konya!, Sijui vishots gani huko unaagiza coctail kabisaa ya liquor na mikombinenga ya hatari!!!!!!! Khaaaaaaaa! Mpaka mtu anakuogopa achia mbali hilo Bili na shoti utayotia! Wanaume pia jianaume levi linatisha mwenzangu!!!!!!! Take it slow!!!! Kunywa redds au Dompo/Msalaba/Altar wine ile ki priest zaidi!!!!!!!!!!

5.Jifanye mshamba!!!!!!! Kaa umsikilize mwenzio kidogo!!! Sio akianzisha mada ushaidaka juu juu!!!!! Kila kitu wakijua wewe! Hata kama wajua play stupid ili mwenzio apate comfidence ya kuongea na kumake comversation! Kila jambo walijua hadi ya Napoleon Hill wayajua wewe, si ya Dan Brown hata ya Lyod Nchunga wa Yanga pia wayajua!!!! Khaaaaaaaaaaa! We mwana weee! Sitoki tena na wewe!!!!!! Mie pia najua mambo mengi ila nanyuti tu kimyaa japo akinichakachulia na uongo au kitu kasikia anajifanya ankijua nacheka tu moyoni! Sio kumshushua hapo hapo nirudishe chenchi!!!!!!!!!

6. Malalamiko na Machungu yako ya nyuma hapo si mahala pake atiiii! Oh! Mi nimetendwa sana, sina bahati, wenzangu wameolewa! Hai huuuuuuuuu! Kabisaaaaaaaa! "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."-Abraham Lincon! We ongelea present na future! Nini unapendelea! Malengo yako maishani ni nini! Vitu entertaining kama hivo!!!!! Sio wajfunguaaaaa hadi walia katikati!!!! Looooh!!!!!!

7.Kumsifia Bwana/Bibi wako wa zamani!!!!!!!! Kama wa maana sana huyo bwana/bibi hapa tunafanya nini? Si umfate huko aliko? Alikuwa ananijali, ni mkarimu, ana upendo sasa unachotaka nije nifukie mzimu wake ama!!!!!! Hai huuuuuuu kabisaaaa! Hata usimzungumzie kabisaaa atakutilieni gundu tu kidate kizima!

8.Body Language! Unakaa nyonde nyonde kama mgonjwa wa kifaduro au pepo punda kisaaaaa! Uonekane mpole usie na makuu! Khaaaaaaaaa!!!!! Tbasamu dada! Onesha wainjoy the company, cheka unenepe! mziki ukipigwa cheza, anzisha maongezi sio kujibu mmmmh! Kama katoto kumbe zeee! ALAS! Ila usizidishe bandugu manake kukwambia cheza ndo upande juu ya spika na kushake the booty! Mi simoooo!

9.Mavazi! umealikwa vaa kwa staha ila sio kishamba!!!!! Vaa kwa staha manake usitoke kama changu anaenda mawindoni!! Vaa supra zako kali za kisasa ila zisitiri mwili sio chupi lote nje!!!!!!!!! Au wapiga midosho ya kitenge au nguo za kishamba hadi mwenzio akikuona anaanza kufadhaika!!!!! Vaa gauni lako sexy safi au jeans na tshirt bomba kabisaa! Mambo ya ufashionista colour blocking siju colour combo unaweza kukimbiwa!!!!!!! Sijui green, purple, yellow kama clown ndo wajiona bonge ya fashionista!!!!! Wigi kama Nick Minaji anaperform! Khaaaaaa! Na wananume modo imekubanaa hata ukijamba ushuzi unabaki humohumo hadi uvue hio modo utahisiwa si riziki bureeeeee! Kikatu Papa Mukulu ana afadhali kilivochongoka!!!!!

10. Omba netx date!!!!! Ndio! Ukizubaa unakufa kifo cha mende miguu juu!!!!!! We sikilizia ukiona hasemi jilipue! Nakualika kwangu next time !!!!! Au waonaje tukienda sehemu flani jmosi ijayao? Na mambo kama hayo! Ondoka ukijua kuonana tena kupo specified! Take the lead!!!! Sio kujifanya wewe hapo unapendwa saaaana na mwenzio ndo kijakazi wako kukualika kila siku! Time hela zako kuwa chopped!

Ni hayo tu! Natumai mbavu zenu zimenyooka na stress zimewaisha kabisaaa! (JF IS NEVER BORING!!!!!)

Nilisahau kuongezea....kuna kina dada wanaona kuwa na baadhi ya magonjwa kama vile sifa. Unakuta umekutana na mtu kwa mara ya kwanza tu mara akwambie “si unajua nina vidonda vya tumbo” mara c unajua nina BP ya kuoanda/kushuka. Huyo huyo atakwambia ana pumu.” Hivi hata kama una mpenda mtu ukishatajiwa maradhi yote haya c unakatika stimu kabisa. Girls take your time before informing your dates about every fact regarding your life. Otherwise.......................

 

[Don Mangi]

Acha ubishi kuna watu wanaboa sanaaa! Ukianza kitu anakukata mid sentence na kumalizia! Sasa mwenzie anakuwa anamsikiliza usiku kucha kama radio! It kills a mans ego! Anaju hapo hata kwa bed ni Woman On Top Mwanzo mwisho!

Hahaha, umenikumbusha sana mbali shem lara 1 nishapata wa woman on top mwa. . .mwi yani she was the kind who wanted 2 take controll of everything. Mpaka nikaboreka nikatake time yangu.

 

[Karucee]

I still insist kwamba mimi ndie nitaplay hiyo card ya date ya pili. If the first one was not worth my time why waste time, money and energy on the second? First impressions are lasting impressions, the second 'act' he can take elsewhere.
Pili, I cannot live my life on 'what ifs'. What if I dont get another date this year, what if am not young enough what if am not beautiful enough? That is utter nonsense. It is simply a date and I will not lay any future expections with a man out of a first date.

 

[Chimbuvu]

Nikikutoa out wewe ile tukiagana ndio forever hata sitakusms kabisaaaaaaaaaaaaa

hahaha! Madame B umemshindwa mie ndo utaniweza?? jenga hoja sio kuanza kuulizia status za watu