:) cheka kimtindo | JamiiForums | The Home of Great Thinkers

# :) cheka kimtindo

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Viol, Oct 20, 2011.

1. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#1
Oct 20, 2011
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Jaama aliingia kwenye daladala,akakutana na dada m1,mazungumzo yalikuwa hv.....
Jamaa:Kwa sababu una kila kitu nnachotafuta

2. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#2
Oct 20, 2011
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Katika mazoezi ya mgambo kutafuta wanajeshi.uliwadia muda wakulenga shabaa,kamanda wa kikosi akasikia mmoja wa mgambo wake anamwaga risasi kama rambo,akamfuata akaangalia wapi alipopiga,akakuta hajalenga hata risasi moja kwenye ile karatasi ya shabaa.akamuuliza

kamanda-mbona hujapata hata point moja kwenye kulenga shabaa?umebakiwa na risasi ngapi?

Mgambo-siwezi,na nimebaki na risasi moja

kamanda-(kwa hasira)nenda kule msituni kajiue nayo kichwani ufie hukohuko.

Mgambo akaondoka akaenda porini kujipiga.dk2 zikaisha huku kwa kamanda wakasikia mlio wa risasi,kamanda akaamua kwenda kumwangalia kama jamaa amejipiga kweli,hata hajafika porini anakutana na mgambo anarudi.

Kamanda-wee sinilikuambia uende ukajiue

mgambo-nimejipiga ila nimejikosa.

3. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#3
Oct 20, 2011
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Daktari wa saikolojia alitembelewa na askari jela na mazungumzo yakawa hivi.
ASKARI:hivi dokta huwa unamjuaje mtu aliyechanganyikiwa akili?
DR:Aaah huwa namuuliza swali jepesi ambalo mtu mwenye akili timamu ataweza kulijibu.
ASKARI:Swali kama lipi?hebu nipe mfano.
DR:Ok...kwa mfano...Chifu mkwawa aliwahi kupigana vita mara tatu na kifo chake kilitokea akiwa vitani.Je ni vita ipi hiyo??
ASKARI:Aaah..mmmh...kwa kweli mi siko vizuri sana kwenye historia,hebu nitafutie swali lingine mbali na historia

4. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#4
Oct 20, 2011
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Mwalimu wamatahira aliingia na nazi dasani akawambia hili ni yai la tembo nanianaweza kulisotea mpaka tembo atoke tahira lakiume likatoka mbele likaenda kulisotea mpaka suruali ikachanika wenzake wakaona jogoo wa jamaa anaanza kutoka, wakaanza kushangilia mkonga mkonga ghafla wakaona p**bu wakasema masikio masiko mwalimu hoi!

5. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#5
Oct 20, 2011
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Kulikuwa na mzee mmoja mkali kishenz
i ila alikuwa hajui kiingereza
kabisaa... Mwanae
anayesoma
international schol
alikuwa na demu wake
ambaye one day demu
akaenda kumcheki
mshkaji kwao...
Kufika akamkuta jamaa
kakaa sebuleni na
mdingi wake... Yule
kijana baada tu ya
demu kusalimia
akamwambia yule demu
wake...
''Aahaaa, ndo umekuja
kufata kile kitabu cha
'Speak english my
father doesn't know?!''
Demu akamjibu, "Ndiyo
na naomba uniazime kile
kitabu cha story cha
promise?'
Kijana akajibu, "Kile cna
kipo cha 'Wait for me
under the coconut tree
outside".
Daah, dingi kusikia hivyo
akanyanyuka na kumpa
dogo mwekundu na
kumpongeza kwa
kupenda kusoma vitabu
then akaelekea zake

6. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#6
Oct 20, 2011
Joined: Dec 15, 2009
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Mama mmoja wakati anamfokea mwanae mdogo alieharibu jambo alimalizia kwa kumuambia...
"...muone kwanza, sura mfuko wa jeans"
Mtoto akauliza "wa mbele, wa nyuma?

7. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#7
Oct 20, 2011
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Wanaume wawili walikua wanataka kupigana
Wa 1:Nipige uone kama hutashtakiwa na watu wa haki za wanyama
Wa 2:Bahati nzuri unajijua kama una sura kama NYATI

8. ### mikatabafekiJF-Expert Member

#8
Oct 20, 2011
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ah haaa haaaa...................mkuu na ile ID ya Jguar ni ya kwako nini???kuna kigezo fulani ukiacha fun msgs kuna kigezo nakiona hebu ntaku pm

9. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#9
Oct 20, 2011
Joined: Dec 15, 2009
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mkuu hii dah unanitisha....ebu nipe hiyo kigezo,ni Pm

10. ### mysterymanJF-Expert Member

#10
Oct 21, 2011
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Hahahaha hiyo ya madogo na kiingereza nouma

11. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#11
Oct 21, 2011
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wanajifanya wasomi

12. ### JaguarJF-Expert Member

#12
Oct 21, 2011
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Ah wapi,jaguar hawezi kuwa Excellent namna hii!

13. ### rosemarieJF-Expert Member

#13
Oct 21, 2011
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Mkuu nakukubali sana kwenye hizi comedy zetu

14. ### hayakaJF-Expert Member

#14
Oct 21, 2011
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hongera mkuu we nimkali, zote ziko poa kinoma.

15. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#15
Oct 21, 2011
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Ebu mwambie,mana sijui anatumia vigezo gani

16. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#16
Oct 21, 2011
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thanks mkuu

17. ### ViolJF-Expert Member

#17
Oct 21, 2011
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thanks mkuu

18. ### CantalisiaJF-Expert Member

#18
Oct 21, 2011
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Haaaaa haaaa haaaaa!excellent bwana!

19. ### CantalisiaJF-Expert Member

#19
Oct 21, 2011
Joined: Sep 26, 2011
Messages: 5,229