Ni mwezi mmoja umepita tangu nilete suala hilo hapa jukwaani nisikuleta suala hilo kama mzaha ni jambo ambalo linanigusa kwa ukubwa wa kipekee na kwa kutambua umuhimu wa wanajf hasa MMU nilitegemea kupata ushauri mzuri toka kwenu wapo watu walitoa ushauri mzuri sana mpaka wengine wakaweka exprience ya maisha yao wapo wengi walitoa ushauri wa kubeza na kubomoa lakini kwa hakika niliupokea ushauri wenu kwa moyo mkunjufu kabisa.
Kuhusu suala la kuvunja ndoa ni jambo ambalo haliwezekani kwa sababu tayari nina watoto 2 ambao nimezaa nae hivyo nikivunja ndoa nitakuwa na watoto 3 ambao itabidi walelewe na mama wa kambo je, yeye atakubali.
Kuhusu kutumia nguvu kumleta nyumbani nimeona nitamsababishia matatizo mtoto maana ni mdogo ataishi kwa shida hasa wakati ambao sipo nyumbani na itamuadhiri kisaikolojia.
Nilichoamua
nimetafuta shule ya boarding nchini Kenya na nategemea kumpeleka huko mwezi wa nane mihula yao itakapoanza vile vile niliweza kumtafuta mume mamake nikaongea nae kwa mapana zaidi ikiwemo kumuomba mtoto kwenda kumtembelea mamake pindi atakapofunga shule ili angalau apate mapenzi ya mamake akakubali hivyo mtoto ataenda boarding akifunga atakuwa anachagua pa kwenda kwa maana kwamba nyumbani kwetu kwa mama,bibiake mzaa mama na kwa mamake mzazi mpaka pale atakapofikia umri wa kujitegemea na kujitambua ndipo atakuja kuishi nyumbani.
Mwanamke kamkataa mtoto wangu
Ah ha ha h nakunywa kyokikyola iliyoandikwa jina langu aha ha haah
Mpekeke kwa bibi /babu yake... Wazazi wako kama wapo hai , wakusaidie kulea mjukuu lakini usiwasusie upeleke matumizi yote
Wazazi tena tuache wapumzike.
Ngumu mno kuishi na mtto wa kambo, i knw t very well.. Hata ujitahid umpende vip, damu nzito kuliko maji huwez kumpenda km wako wa kumzaa kabsa. kuanza ukimuona unajikuta muda mwngne unaingia chuki na mumeo kwa kukumbusha uharibifu alioufanya nyuma. serious ukifika hapo mtoto huwez kumpenda kbsa, sn sn utajiforce tu uonekane unampenda lakn moyon unajua mwenyew.. Na km mtto mwenyew kashakua bas unakuta huko alikokuwa anakaa kashajazwa maneno kibao akihamia tu hapo mtoto nae anaingia chuki na wew, kuwa ww ndie uliesababisha mama ake aachike, hawaelewagi jambo jngne.. Ni ngumu saaana, so hard. Hasa mara nyng ukiwa msichana hamnaga anaekuwaga na ndoto ya kuitwa mama wa kambo, ts ugly word. Nobody lyks tht name.. unahitaji moyo wa pekee lasivyo ndoa itakuwa chungu..
Kama ulimwambia hata kabla ya ndoa na akaridhia, basi itakua alitafuta tu njia ya kukupata, lakini hana mapenzi ya dhati na wewe na ana roho mbaya, kumbuka mtoto ni damu yako na lazima uoneshe kuwa unaipenda damu yako tena kwa dhati na hauko tayari kuona mtoto wako ananyanyasika wakati baba yake yupo hai na una uwezo wa kulea, simama na umtete mwanao weka mikakati na uisimamie, zen mlete mtoto hapo home.
Ukiendekeza mapenzi unayopata kwa mkeo atakushawishi vibaya juu ya mwanao, mtetee mwanao, ajisikie ana baba la sivyo ataishi kwa manyanyaso. Mama yake tu hana time naye unadhani ataenda wapi akapate upendo kama sio kwako.
Nb; Na nyie wanaume pia acheni kuwakataa watoto waliozaliwa na wake zenu kabla ya kuwaoa, ukute hata huyo mama mtoto ana tamani kuishi na mwanae lakini mumewe huko amekataa.
Ngumu mno kuishi na mtto wa kambo, i knw t very well.. Hata ujitahid umpende vip, damu nzito kuliko maji huwez kumpenda km wako wa kumzaa kabsa. kuanza ukimuona unajikuta muda mwngne unaingia chuki na mumeo kwa kukumbusha uharibifu alioufanya nyuma. serious ukifika hapo mtoto huwez kumpenda kbsa, sn sn utajiforce tu uonekane unampenda lakn moyon unajua mwenyew.. Na km mtto mwenyew kashakua bas unakuta huko alikokuwa anakaa kashajazwa maneno kibao akihamia tu hapo mtoto nae anaingia chuki na wew, kuwa ww ndie uliesababisha mama ake aachike, hawaelewagi jambo jngne.. Ni ngumu saaana, so hard. Hasa mara nyng ukiwa msichana hamnaga anaekuwaga na ndoto ya kuitwa mama wa kambo, ts ugly word. Nobody lyks tht name.. unahitaji moyo wa pekee lasivyo ndoa itakuwa chungu..
Well said dear... uchungu wa mwana aujuaye ni mzazi .. I remember my own Father broke down with tears when the day He left me with my step mother . Those tears of his I have never seen to any other man ... He was broken very broken ... because my step mother told him she couldn't live with me ... I have never understood before at that time but as I grew up now I do understanding .. Huyu kaka my dear ana mtihani mkubwa sana he needs prayers too to make a wise decision ... kwa maana yule ni mkewe na huyu ni damu yake . But at the end the blood is thicker than water .. And likija kwa swala la mama mzazi wa mtoto I just don't know agreement gani aliweka na huyo mume wake kabla hajaolewa. I can feel she seems don't have a voice in her marriage .. You know some of us women are afraid to discuss about our children we had before met our current husband ... Huenda because may be she was thinking too much to get marry to the guy than talk about how is he going to play a part as a step father ... so its really hard my dear .. Both sides need prayers honestly.. Thanks..
Ndio hivyo mkuu, maisha yana changamoto nyingi, lazima tumuombe Mungu na akili kichwani pia
My dear women like this are so fake. They can even kill you without knowing it.. Iko ile roho ya huruma iko wapi aliyotupa Mungu kwa sisi wanawake . Kama MTU anamuambia mumewe anampenda kila siku na kulala nae kitanda kimoja but blood ya mumewe anaikataa ,duuh . May b I am wrong but kwa nilivyolelewa if I do this nafsi na moyo vitanisuta na kupoteza Peace. The truth is First my family will never allow me to do this .. Wapwani wale watanisema na kunisusa because they didn't raise me to become a monster Bali to become the way God wants me to b inorder to fulfil his purpose through my life . Thanks..