Mimi huwa na majuto sana katika maisha yangu..
Nime pitia mengi sana, ambayo sometimes huwa najiuliza as to why God alinipitisha!
Trauma, ilinifanya nikawa phobic, yaani niliona kabisa, this place(world) sio sehemu yangu.
So Nikawithdraw into addiction, imenichukua muda sana. Nimekaa kuogopa kuishi kwa miaka mingi, because ya maumivu mengi sana.
Ila mapenzi ya Mungu bwana, alifanya vile kuni humble. By the end of last year, kidogo nitoweke kabisa, I was suicidal.
Ila nikasema ngoja tuone, ilikuwa unatamani usiku ufikie kalale then upitlize kabisa usiamke... That's how insane my depression was.
Ila niliweza kuvuka.
Kilicho baki huwa ni regrets onto the years I lost kupitia tanuri la mateso.
Now, I don't judge people going thru hell, najua kuwa hatuko in control as how people think, kila mtu anakuwa affected by things ambazo hata yeye hayuko aware of.
Hata mapigo yako ya moyo huwezi control, pumzi unayo vuta ina happen involuntary, yaani we always want the best, but God has better plans for us.
Japo kuwa am not into religion u do believe kuwa kuna higher power, inayo sababishwa kila destiny ya mtu au kiumbe hai itokee.
Tupac alisema, "don't blame me, I was given this world, I did not make it"
Nawatakia weekend njema.
