You wish You Weren't Married?

Maalim, hapa kiswahili chako kimeniacha mbali sana... Nadhani mi wa kuja. Kuna slang au?

...:D maana'ke; linaloshindikana. Kiswahili chapishana yakhe.
 
Marriage is how you take it, its too personal. You can't copy and paste or compare, never!!

Kama maisha yalivyo, ndiyo nature ya ndoa. Leo unapesa kesho huna, Lakini maisha yanaendelea. Kama ndoa yako siyo natural basi tegemea up's and down nyingi na challenges kibao.

Kwa Kifupi, raha ya ndoa uishi natural, fanya kazi kwa bidii, usiendekeze maajungu na ushoga.
 
Ndoa raha bana...

Ndoa ni bomba tu ila ubinafsi wetu ndio unatuponza.

Mifano mingi tu ipo ya wanandoa wabinafsi mfano mzuri Kesi ya Dokta aliyetoa figo kuokoa maisha ya mamsapu wake. Mamsapu kupona tu kisha tafuta 'kidumu' yote hayo umimi mwingi tu.

Mfano mwingine ni ndugu mmoja hapo Darisalama. Yeye alikuwa msomi sana na akawa anamchumba msomi pale chuo kimoja chini chenye madaktari wa falsafa wenye utata, mji kasoro bahari. Jamaa kila mwisho wa juma anaenda kusalimia mchumba. Siku moja basi la Abood lilichelewa kuingia Morogoro, Kumbe mchumba anakidumu chake hapo chuoni anajivinjari nacho huku akijua mgombea mwenza yeye yuko dar anasaka nondoz na hawezi kustukia. Jamaa kufika anakuta mlango umeegeshwa kuingia hamadi ... mchumba yuko kwenye kilele cha malavidavi. Jamaa akaishia kukaa chini mlango huku Israel akimbipu.

Tuache hilo, jamaa akiwa njiani kurudi akakutana na binti aliyemaliza darasa la saba wakiwa siti moja kwenye basi kurudi Darisalama. Basi binti kumuona jamaa mpweke akaamua kumpa maneno ya faraja mwisho wa safari wakabadilishana nambari za simu kwa mawasiliano zaidi.

Jamaa kwa sababu ya lile jeraa alilopata kule mji kasoro bahari akaamua kumweka ndani mtoto kupitia pale kanisa la mtakatifu Albani kwa chereko chereko na mbwembwe kibao.

Yaliyijiri baada ya miaka sita ni kuwa waliweza kupata watoto wawili wazuri sana kasheshe ilianza jamaa alipopata Phd na mama kumbuka alikuwa akisonga ugali na kuhakikisha jamaa hana hata chembe ya shinikizo katika kutafuta udaktari wake wa falsafa katika fani ya kipilato pilato. Mwisho wa siku jamaa akaingiwa na kale kaugonjwa ka wanandoa ka umimi bin "ubinafisi". Akaanza kujiona 'keki' na huyo mama wa watu kamuona kinyesi na kutaka kumtupa kichakani ile alete mtu wa hadhi yake mle ndani ili kusudi mambo ya 'yes' 'u know me' ndani ya nyumba na kuachana na 'mimi ni maimuna' yote hayo ni ubinafisi. Ni kweli jamaa alitengana na mke wake lakini mwisho wa siku jamaa yuko misery kwa sababu bado anaendelea kutafuta the right woman.

Nasema ndoa ni jinsi wewe utakavyoamua kuiweka na si kuangalia ya jirani amefanyaje. Wengine wanafata sana mikumbo na kuishia kuanguaka ndani ya shimo la tewa.

Shadow.
 
marriage is how you take it. no training on it.

but to me i enjoying being married, more respect in the society and things like that, i can't opt to be single anymore though wife akinitibua some feelings of getting out are lingering in my mind
 
pale nilivyoanza kuona vituko vya mwanaume, nilijutia uamuzi wangu sana, nilijiuliza mara 100 kwa nini niliingia kwenye hii sector nikakosa jibu, smtymz yes smtymz no! kweli inahitaji uvumilivu sana, kwasasa naanza kufurahia ndoa baada ya kunipumzisha roho yangu, na ile dhana ya kujuta imefutika.
 
Our society puts alot of pressure on people to get married even those who are clearly not fit for marriage.This leads to so many misfits and mismatched people entering into it and make things worse by bringing kids into their unhappy and unstable unions.There is nothing that makes kids suffer more than an unhappy marriage,their parents fighting all the time.No love in the home.Physical violence and insecurity because kids dont know when the parents will break up.If society respected single people more we would not see so many bad marriages lakini now its like ukifika age fulani lazima ufunge ndoa hata kama ur a drug addict,rapist,thief,irresponsible or you havent met the right person.Failure to which people brand you a reject,irresponsible or a homosexual yet some of the most responsible people I know are people who are in their forties and fifties and never been married.This is the real reason so many people are in wrong marriage because society says a bad marriage is better than no marriage and maligns single people while respecting married people many of who lack integrity and do not even deserve this respect.

At one time I was really very negative about marriage but after seeing a few(very few by the way) marriages mostly couples who are God fearing I have come to see marraige as a lovely institution when you are the right person and find a right partner for yourself.The love and respect I see in some marriages bring tears to my eyes like that of Obama and Michelle(huyo mtu anamuheshimu bibi yake) which woman doesnt want a husband who treats her like that?

On the other hand nimeona some marriages that were made in hell and can easily make even the most hopeless romantic take an oath never to get married.This is especially when you see a man being more cruel to his wife and mother of his kids than he can even be to an animal.Honestly some men!!!!!
 
Kila kitu kina wakati wake;utaishi maisha ya ukapela kwa muda fulani.Muda siku zote huwa haurudi nyuma,hivyo basi ukiachana na ukapela then ni kuoa.
Hiyo ni sehemu ya maisha ya mwanadamu.
 
Tatizo ni pamoja hizi NGOs zinazowapa watu vichwa!Sisi tuliooa miaka ya kabla ya NGOs tulifaidi sana ila sasa jasho linatutoka,inabidi ujitutumue ukiwa nje, ukirudi nyumbani inabidi umuombe mkeo akupigie chumbani,inabidi uwe na mali ambazo anazijua baba yako na familly tu(maana anazozijua mkeo ni zake zote) na akiwa amesoma ndio shughuli pevu,akikusikia umeonekana na mwanamke kwenye gari,kesho yake na yeye harudi. Kwa kweli I wish ndoa ingesimama kwa masaa nikapumua!
 
Sahiba ni mmoja kati ya wale wanaojuta maana dada zetu sometime unamaliza mbinu zote jibu hapana sawa na shikio la kufa.Ndugu zangu msijaribu wanugu matatizo eh.

SAHIBA.
 
Couldn't agree more with the two below,ni kweli kabisa kwa mtu yoyote ambaye apenda ndoa/familia yake

Binafsi mawazo hayo hayajawi kupita katika kichwa changu,sana sana siku ambayo wife atakuwa amenitibua kidogo ambalo ni jambo lisilozuilika,naweza kuwaza kama pangekuwa na tofauti kama ningeoa mwanamke mwingine tofauti na yeye,ambalo mwishowe jibu lake uwa ni hapana.
Lakini sijawahi na sidhani kama nitakuja kuwaza kuyarudia maisha ya useja,sana sana nahisi nilichelewa kuoa.

To be honest at times you think how would it be if I were single!!! but when I think of the many things (sweet marital life, sweet family life, the sharing of sorrows, the plans you put together, the legal ownership of ur mate, the etc (u can name millions)) I just can never wish to be single, I am a hunderd times healthier having my spouse always next to me.
 
Sahiba ni mmoja kati ya wale wanaojuta maana dada zetu sometime unamaliza mbinu zote jibu hapana sawa na shikio la kufa.Ndugu zangu msijaribu wanugu matatizo eh.

SAHIBA.

Unachotakiwa kujua huko peke yako, muombe Mungu wako atakufunulia tuu. Jamani pia wadada msiogope kuwaambia ma partner wenu kuwa wanawabore katika hiki na kile. Kimya hakisaidii kabisa, ongea, ongea naye na kisha zungumza naye.
 
unachotakiwa kujua huko peke yako, muombe mungu wako atakufunulia tuu. Jamani pia wadada msiogope kuwaambia ma partner wenu kuwa wanawabore katika hiki na kile. Kimya hakisaidii kabisa, ongea, ongea naye na kisha zungumza naye.

na hawa kinadada kwa kufeki ndio wenyewe once ukiwaweka ndani some of them hisabu umeumia,once you have a child,forget it,the only way ukakaa nao ni kukubali yaishe na ikiwa hivyo ndio wanasema umetiliwa limbwata maana unarudi kazini unaogopa kusema nyumbani kwako ukisema mwenzio analifungulia usiku kucha.

Sahiba.
 
A professor once said that the reason why women rejoice greatly during their weddings while the men keep a straight faces was because, the woman feels like:"oh, at last I have nailed him!" and the man laments:"Oh, what a fool I have been; trouble was on its own and I went to buy it for myself, now I'm no longer going to be free!"

The question is:
Do you sometimes wish you weren't married or that your marital status could be suspended even for just a few hours? Please sincere answers will be appreciated.

mada ya leo lazima watu wagombane humu ndani...
wapo waofurahia maisha yao ya ndoa,
na wapo ambao maisha yao ya ndoa ni laana na mateso makubwa hapa duniani
 
Unachotakiwa kujua huko peke yako, muombe Mungu wako atakufunulia tuu. Jamani pia wadada msiogope kuwaambia ma partner wenu kuwa wanawabore katika hiki na kile. Kimya hakisaidii kabisa, ongea, ongea naye na kisha zungumza naye.


dear kuna wanaume vichwa maji, mie wangu nilizungumza nae weeee nikaona inaingia huku na kutokea kule,mwishowe nikaamua kumuacha free, nadhani alijichokea mwenyewe huko akaamua kutulia.
 

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