Why did i get married??

tracy said:

i wish i could hug you right now..(naona these days nakua sentimental kidogo)
kukata tamaa na jambo ambalo unaamini kuna a way (hata chance iwe ndogo vipi)is a crime (kwangu)
siko kwenye ndoa ila naamini kama relationships ni kama 24hrs jobs na inahitaji moyo wa ziada kwa sasa ili ndoa yako isimame,am not a fan of divorce maybe pale kunapokua hakuna nafasi kabisaaaa ya kujenga tena
i also believe on fasting and praying kwa kitu unachohitaji,Mungu sio kiziwi
fanya kila kitu ukiwezacho,ukishindwa just let it be..hutajuta baadae.pole

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Asante tracy kwa faraja, am trying to hold on.

Bora huku tz nako tungefanya tu ndoa za mkataba. Unakaa na mtu anayekuudhi kama shetani unamchukia,mwisho wa siku tena unamsamehe mnaendeleza maisha ila bado anakuja kukupa tena maudhi yale2.

wakora said:

Mbona hujasema shida nini,? Anakupiga, anacheat, katoka na housegirl au halali nyumbani au mlev, hana bullet???

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Hayo ni mambo makubwa ambayo huwa yanatokea kwenye ndoa na baadhi yameshanitokea ila niliyasolve yakaisha sasa hivi vitu vidogo vidogo vya kupishana kiswahili ndo vinasababisha hata ujiulize na kuvumilia kwangu kote matatizo makubwa bado na haya madogo madogo yalete kero, kifupi ni kero ndogo ndogo, mfano naweza uliza umeruhusu house boy aondoke nani atashuhulikia ng'ombe au shamba? Jibu utakalopata utajuta kuuliza swali na hutatamani kuendelea na maongezi ni hivo tuu.

Mkunde Original said:

Habari zenu za week end MMU??

Nimejikuta najiuliza hili swali jioni hii bila jibu, najua kuna movie ya kimarekani inaitwa hivi na nilishawahi kuangalia ila nimekosa jibu ilikuwaje kuwaje nikaolewa memory imekata kabisaaaa hapa nilipo sielewi hat kwa nini bado niko ndani ya hii ndoa. May be am not a good wife and nimejisahau sitimizi majukumu yangu kama mke ila kwa nini haniachi? If I examine myself yeah ninamapungufu ila na siwezi kuwa mkamilifu kama malaika am trying my level best but sioni mwisho wa hii ndoa. Kifupi nimechoka na sina guts za kutoka mwenyewe hadi nifukuzwe yaani akithubutu tuu kunitimua hata usiku wa manane atakuwa kanipa ahueni but at the same time am not sure if I can at all survive on my own thats why sithubutu kutimka on my own. Ila kwa nini inakuwa tabu bin shida kila leo na yaleyale ndo yanajirudia? Nahisi uvumilivu wangu unaelekea negative sijui nikiwa dataz wife itasaidia yaani niwe sijali lolote niwe bora liende kwangu yote yawe sawa..........................????
Mkiona hivi kama ujue maji yamenizidi nguvu na nahisi kuzama na nikiangalia kulia, kushoto mbele na nyuma hakuna hata kijiti cha kushikilia walau kunisupport nisizame.
Am so down Mkunde mimi..........

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Hizi mambo hizi..kama muwa vile. Kuna mwingine unanunua unakuta mtam, mwingine kama bua..dah! Pole bhana ndio naloweza kusema

Very sorry for u! jaribu kubaini kipi kinapungua then take action,kuachana na kudondokea kwa mwingine c jambo la kumaliza tatizo lako! please hold

Mkunde Original said:

Hayo ni mambo makubwa ambayo huwa yanatokea kwenye ndoa na baadhi yameshanitokea ila niliyasolve yakaisha sasa hivi vitu vidogo vidogo vya kupishana kiswahili ndo vinasababisha hata ujiulize na kuvumilia kwangu kote matatizo makubwa bado na haya madogo madogo yalete kero, kifupi ni kero ndogo ndogo, mfano naweza uliza umeruhusu house boy aondoke nani atashuhulikia ng'ombe au shamba? Jibu utakalopata utajuta kuuliza swali na hutatamani kuendelea na maongezi ni hivo tuu.

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mkunde my dear nikukumbushe kuwa kwenye maongezi na mwanaume it is not what you say rather it is how you say it! hii ni communication 101 - basic stuff kabisa kwani hakuna mwanaume anayependa kuongeleshwa kwa kebehi na mwanamke duniani, hakuna! mark my words. Kama unamuongelesha kwa kejeli tena mbele ya watoto na/au familia au houseboy/girl au majirani na watu wengine huyo bwana hawezi kufurahia. Tena una bahati ingekuwa wanaume wengine waliopinda ungetandikwa na vibao. Men take their ego extremely seriously. Remember it is HOW you communicate with a man that matters.

Mkunde Original said:

I also have the hopes kuwa litapita, asante ila kuna muda daaah unatamani upige yowe kubwaaaaaa

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yan ujue nakuelewa katika namna huwezi elewa nakuelewa kiasi gani!
PIGA YOWE!
SCREAM!
MAKE A VERRRY BIG SHOUT!
upo kweny uhitaji wa kitu ambacho nakielewa sana!

Mh! pole dia. ila ndoa hazina formula, mi naamini hakuna best practice kwenye ndoa. nafikiri ndoa nyingi zina kipindi cha mpito kama hicho unayoyaongea wengi tumeyapitia. kuna dada mmoja kachangia humu kwamba inatokea m2 anakukera na unamchukia kama nini, unaamua kusamehe na kuendela kuishi nae, halafu anarudia mambo yale yale unajikuta unashindwa kujua kwamba uendelee kumchukia au ufanjeje.
swala la msingi ni kuongea mfano swala kutembelea ndg mi nilimwambia kabisa hiyo kwangu ni kama mateso na sipo comfortable nikiwa kwa watu, sipendi hata kutumia toilets za watu naweza bana mkojo siku nzima. jipe furaha mwenyewe, choose to be happy, love yourself, take care of yourself and your body, poteza mawazo either kwa kufanya kazi zaidi au anzisha hata biashara au fuga ukitoka kazini unaendelea na biashara zako, tafuta hobby kitu kitakachokufanya uwe busy but at the same time unarelax na kujisikia comfortable mf. swimming, gym. ukiwa busy na kazi binafsi au business hata muda wa kutembelea wa2 au kukaa kijijini mwezi mzima hautapatikana. Jifunze pia ku-ignore kero zake, wazungu wanasema "life is how you make it". lakini la muhimu, time is a great healer huwa yanaisha

Mkunde Original said:

Ni kutokuelewana vitu vidogo vidogo tuu ambavyo unakuwa unavipuuzia lakini vikijaa chungu ndo hapo najikuta nimechoka na sina hamu ya kuendelea, kupishana kiswahili tuu pia kunaweza leta ugomvi, waweza uliza swali au kusema kitu mwenzio akatafsiri vingine na kumaanisha vingine ukishangaa kwa kutabasamu wakati ukimwambia mbona mie sijamaanisha hivo anachukia kuwa unamdharau na kumcheka wakati yeye kachukia basi ni vitu vya namna hiyo.
Nashukuru dhambi ya kutokulala nyumbani haipo ni vijimambo tuu vidogovidogo vinavokera.

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Na hii ndio inayofanya ndoa iwe chungu wakati mwingine bora hata anaecheat ingawa haifai. Ndoa nyingi hufarakana si kwa tatizo kubwa ni mambo kama haya. Pia jaribu kufuatilia vizuri kwa taratibu ni kwanini anakua hajiamini kiasi hiki. Unajua wengine hujistukia sana hasa familia zenu kiuwezo kama zinapishana sana (uwezo wa wazazi). Na pengine huko nyuma aliumizwa kimalezi au ni mtu anaependa kususa.

Angalia yeye anamchukuliaje mwanamke, wengine wana imani kuwa mwanamke hajui kitu na ni mwiko kupokea ushauri wa mwanamke. Halafu hii tabia ya kutowaacha wakwao nayo ni tatizo mno , mpendwa Mungu akusaidie tu ktk hili na naamini atatenda , kwa kua unampenda isipokua ni hizo kasoro kidogo basi tegemea msaada toka juu muda si mrefu.

snowhite said:

yan ujue nakuelewa katika namna huwezi elewa nakuelewa kiasi gani!
PIGA YOWE!
SCREAM!
MAKE A VERRRY BIG SHOUT!
upo kweny uhitaji wa kitu ambacho nakielewa sana!

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.
yaah. unavitu umevibeba rohon dats y u need to screem n ts ok hata kulia. u need sm1 to talk too n listen to u n hutoe hasira zako hapo utajua majib y naswal yote wajiuliza. just llook 4 sm1 u trust n do it. trust me it helps.

Mkunde Original said:

Habari zenu za week end MMU??

Nimejikuta najiuliza hili swali jioni hii bila jibu, najua kuna movie ya kimarekani inaitwa hivi na nilishawahi kuangalia ila nimekosa jibu ilikuwaje kuwaje nikaolewa memory imekata kabisaaaa hapa nilipo sielewi hat kwa nini bado niko ndani ya hii ndoa. May be am not a good wife and nimejisahau sitimizi majukumu yangu kama mke ila kwa nini haniachi? If I examine myself yeah ninamapungufu ila na siwezi kuwa mkamilifu kama malaika am trying my level best but sioni mwisho wa hii ndoa. Kifupi nimechoka na sina guts za kutoka mwenyewe hadi nifukuzwe yaani akithubutu tuu kunitimua hata usiku wa manane atakuwa kanipa ahueni but at the same time am not sure if I can at all survive on my own thats why sithubutu kutimka on my own. Ila kwa nini inakuwa tabu bin shida kila leo na yaleyale ndo yanajirudia? Nahisi uvumilivu wangu unaelekea negative sijui nikiwa dataz wife itasaidia yaani niwe sijali lolote niwe bora liende kwangu yote yawe sawa..........................????
Mkiona hivi kama ujue maji yamenizidi nguvu na nahisi kuzama na nikiangalia kulia, kushoto mbele na nyuma hakuna hata kijiti cha kushikilia walau kunisupport nisizame.
Am so down Mkunde mimi..........

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Pole sana, Mlilie Mungu hakuna gumu kwake. Kama anakunyanyasa au anakukosea heshima kwa namna yoyote jaribu kumpotezea kwa muda ukiwa na nia moyoni ya kujenga ndoa yako. usiondoke, wanaume wengine ukiongea kila siku ndo wanazidi vurugu ila uki mu-ignore na ku assume huoni anafanyanini as long as haatarishi maisha yako huwa inasaidia. Fanya yale unayoona yanafaa kuokoa ndoa yako, zaidi muombe Mungu akupe amani moyoni, uache kuwaza ule vizuri, ulale vizuri ufanye kazi zako kwa amani. pole

Jamani nawapenda wote, asanteni na nashukuru kwa ukarimu na upendo wenu. Maneno, mawazo na ushauri mzuri nimeupokea kwa mikono miwili, I don't want to promise anything but with God in my side I belive I can hold on and continue with the marriage journey.
Nimewaza shauri zote nilizopata humu kuwa ni sawa na tuko jeshini kisha tumepangiwa safari ndefu kutembea kwa mguu mchana na usiku bila kujua tunakoenda wala lini tutafika hapo nikafika mahali nikakata tamaa ya kuendelea na safari na kukaa chini, wanajeshi wenzangu wakapita ila kuna wengine wakatoka kwenye msatri wakanifata na kunishika bega na kunipa maneno ya faraja na kunitia moyo na kusema ukibaki hapa itakuwa mbaya zaidi maana utabaki pekeyako bora jikaze twende wote hutapatwa na baya wote tuko kwenye safari moja usifikiri sisi hatujachoka TUNAVUMILIA INUKA TWENDE yaani nimewaona ni watu wa muhimu nanashukuru maana mngeniacha hapo chini kweli hata ningepumzika kuwakimbilia na kuwapata ingekuwa ngumu na ndo ingekuwa mwisho wa ndoa yangu.
Nawashukuru sana kuniokoa ndoa yangu, mbarikiwe.
Nimetoa mfano wa jeshini maana na kuna shuluba na mikiki mikiki mingi na unapopata faraja kwa wenzio kweli inatia moyo, japo sikupitia jeshi ni kutokana na stori na maelezo niliyoyasikia nakuona.
Be blessed all, I L U.

pole my dear, i guess you still need each other thats why hata wewe mwenyewe bado upo hapo. Jitahidi kuangalia ni wapi hapako kama zamani mparekebishe, lakini kikubwa mtangulize Mungu

The Boss said:

wanawake wanataka wanaume tuwe kama TV...
ukitaka music,una badili channel,movie unabadili,news unabadili...
ikikuboa una switch off..TV...

we are humans....sio TV...

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ha haaa, umenichekesha sana hapa rafiki....... hivi ndo mnavyotufikiria tunataka muwe? kweli?

Mkunde Original said:

Hapo ndo nilikuwa napataka kwenye kugrow togather, narudi kule kule why did I get married? Yaani hata sielewi kwasababu nikianzisha idea lets do this itapingwa na itaishia hewani na mimi natafuta idea ingine itachambuliwa na kuonekana ni uharibifu wa hela na nyingine kutafutiwa sababu kwamba haifai haya ukisema yeye basi alete any idea so that we can go together anakwambia sina idea yoyote. ukinifatilia nilishaomba mtu anayejua kuogelea anifundishe hiyo ilikuwa moja ya idea ya kujilkep busy nikamuomba tujifunze wote week ends tuwe tunaogelea nikaambiwa nataka kumuua na maji akiwa mtu mzima wakati yeye hajui kuogelea nikaishia hapo maan ukiendelea sana inakuwa ugomvi kiufupi ni tabu bin shida looh

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Mkunde Original take life easy! mumeo huo ndio uwezo wake wa kuona jambo! saa nyingine unapoleta wazo anaona unajifanya unajua kuliko yeye, ndio maana anacritisize wakati hana hata wazo mbadala. wanaume wengi wa kiafrika wako hivyo, yale unayoweza kuyafanya ambayo hayana madhara kwa familia yenu waweza fanya kidogokidogo. Na hayo ya kumwambia akaswim tena? Hapo ndo anaona unamletea uzungu kabisa!!ni jinsi tu, mnavyoona mambo!

Meljons said:

Bora huku tz nako tungefanya tu ndoa za mkataba. Unakaa na mtu anayekuudhi kama shetani unamchukia,mwisho wa siku tena unamsamehe mnaendeleza maisha ila bado anakuja kukupa tena maudhi yale2.

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Ndio maana watz wengi baada ya kuingia kwenye ndoa na ndoa kuingia migogoro speed ya maendeleo hupungua au husimama kabisa kwa sababu muda wote hufikiria kutatua matatizo ya ndoa.

Mamndenyi said:

Pole mwaya vumilia yatakwisha.

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Dada yangu naona huyu bi dada yupo kwenye among those very stages of marrigae life cycle...being torture and torelance...

Ni hatua tu katika mzunguko mzima...akielewa hivyo hilo halitamsumbua...kila hatua ina mapendekezo yake

NDOA NI SOMO LINALOJITEGEMEA

The Boss na wengine wote mliotoa ushauri katika huu uzi wa Mkunde Original asante sana maana nimejifunza mengi sana ambayo naamini yatanisaidia kwa njia moja ama nyingine.

Ni kawaida kujisikia the way u feel, just give yourself a time, utajikuta unampenda na unapenda kuendelea kuwa kwenye ndoa hiyo, I fall in and out several times but now im ok, keep going, focus like never before

Nakumbuka mwalimu wangu alituambia ndoa ni the only CERTIFICATE in life you will get without any examination nor test mitihani yake utaipata ukiwa ndani yake...you choose him for the good and for the better,for the bad and the worse if its the worst part of it then try to remember the old days and the best times yu had together.Dont let those negativities ruin yur life try to be patient and pray then things will workout well..kama ulimchagua mwenywe bila ya kulazimishwa there is something in him that can make you happy then use that to forget hayo maumivu ila if you chose him for material possessions na sasa umezizoea au sura yake sasa wamuona wa kawaida itakua ngumu..unless vumilia na nikuombee upite katika wakati huu mgumu but dont cheat!!!baki kuwa a faithful wife maybe God will answer your prayers as fast as he can