GOWISHI
JF-Expert Member
- Jan 31, 2015
- 611
- 604
hivi hii submissive mumeitoa wapi mbona mleta mada hajasema hiyo?
hivi hii submissive mumeitoa wapi mbona mleta mada hajasema hiyo?Haha huyo nimemuelewa alikuwa anatania. Kisa mwisho tumekubaliana baada ya yeye kupingana na mleta mada ndo anasema nimekuwa submissive
Sema una uzoefu wa miaka miwili usijifanye mkongwe ili kujifanya expert. .
Mahusiano yangu Yana muda mrefu kuliko tangazo lako la uchumba humu na wala huelewi nature yake. Utafkiri wote tunawaza shela??
tunajifunza mengi kwa wengine pia so huwezi kuja kuongelea watu na maneno ya kashfa ili kujitia uExpert wa mahusiano. Kujifanya Yana tofauti kubwa ni njia ya kujitia ujuaji otherwise you ain't any more committed to your relationship than I am.
Plus wengine wameLast because they had no way out not because they made it, tusidanganyane
Hayo ya usawa umeyaleta wewe. We don't want equality we want equity. Demanding women to be submissive ain't anywhere near equity or a healthy relationship.
Otherwise as far as your comments about listening and compromising we're on the same page
Au nyinyi ni wale feminists wanaokataa womanhood,? Wapo feminists hawataki womanhood wanataka manhood. Watu hawa ndoa hawaipati hata siku moja. Wakati wote wanataka wawe kama mwanaumu kitabia na kila kitu jambo ambalo kisaokolojia na kibiolojia halipo, hutengeneza mwanaume wa kufikirika na hawaji kukutana naye. Baadhi ya tabia walizo nazo amezisema mleta mada nashangaa kwanini mnapinga.KayScarpetta na huyu naye kabadilisha views kabisa... Sio mbaya tumefanya kazi nzuri. Kumbe na wanaume wanapaswa kuwa submissive eeh.... UngemQuote ruttashubanyuma toka mwanzo tusinge fika huku
Au nyinyi ni wale feminists wanaokataa womanhood,? Wapo feminists hawataki womanhood wanataka manhood. Watu hawa ndoa hawajikuipati hata siku moja. Wakati wote wanataka wawe kama mwanaumu kitabia na kila kitu jambo ambalo kisaokolojia na kibiolojia halipo, hutengeneza mwanaume wa kufikirika na hawatakuja kukutana naye mwisho wa siku wanabakia kuwa machangudoa wa maofisini. Baadhi ya tabia walizo nazo amezisema mleta mada nashangaa kwanini mnapinga.KayScarpetta na huyu naye kabadilisha views kabisa... Sio mbaya tumefanya kazi nzuri. Kumbe na wanaume wanapaswa kuwa submissive eeh.... UngemQuote ruttashubanyuma toka mwanzo tusinge fika huku
Nimerejea baadhi ya masuala yaliyomo kwenye mada husika, kwa vile housegirl na wengine wanaochangia kwa mtazamo wake, wamenielewa isivyo mimi na wenye mtizamo kama wangu.Ukapera kwa wanawake wasomi wenye vipato vikubwa, umri upitao miaka 50 huku wana maumbile yenye mvuto upo na unakuwa kila kukicha.
Hali hii inachangiwa na mambo yafuatayo:-
1) Kwenye ujana wao walijiwekea malengo makubwa yasiyotekelezeka na wanaumme Wenye nia ya kuwachumbia huwakatisha tamaa.
6) Pia hupanga malumbano wakidhani maumbile yao au elimu yao au kipato chao ambayo ndilo chimbuko la kiburi na madharau yao itawafanya waonekane bora na kuogopwa kumbe wapenzi huvutwa na unyenyekevu siyo kutunishiana misuli.
Hayo ya uEvanda Tyson ni yako. Nimeongelea mambo tunayoshuhudia kwenye jamii yanayihitaji mabadiliko. Kuna watu wanaMisUse huo msemo wa mwanamke kunyenyekea.Kuna tofauti kati ya kuwa expert(bingwa) na kuwa mzoefu( experience). Sijui ni wapi «nimetaja na kujifanya kuwa bingwa wa ndoa», nina ka uzoefu ka ndoa walau miaka kadhaa, mwenzangu hata kuolewa bado sababu kuona kina Evander vs Tyson kumekuathiri. Pole.
«Mahusiano yako yana muda mrefu kuliko tangazo langu love connect» hayo ni mahusiano butu. Ushauri wangu humu waweza kuwa irrelevant kwako, na wala usiwe na maana, after all utakuwa vipi na maana kwako mwenye mahusiano butu toka ukilelewa hadi leo hii.
Na hii ndo ilikuwa agenda yako. Kutaka kutumia story niliyotoa humu kuonyesha nina matatizo ili kuDiscredit michango yangu . Pole weee. Una matatizo wewe uliyeoa out of desperation kisha kutukanana na wanawake usiku humu.Mahusiano mazuri yanaanzia utotoni ujuwe.
Mimi na wewe hatuwezi kuwa mstari mmoja hata siku moja, hasa kwenye swala la ndoa mdogo wangu.
Ndo uwe unasoma post kabla ya kuCommenthivi hii submissive mumeitoa wapi mbona mleta mada hajasema hiyo?
mwengeso, Original post clearly imeongelea na kusisitiza issue ya 'Effeminacy na Submissiveness'. Mleta thread ameogelea 'negative traits' za hao wanawake anaowaongelea na kusisitiza kwenye point number 6 kuwa, the most damaging trait ya hao wanawake ni 'lack of effeminacy and submissiveness'.KayScarpetta: na wewe pia! Male chauvinist, yes I may be, because I was born a man. Living single, mh! As you deem it right, in your own way. Sijabadili kamwe "views" zangu.
Mara post haiongelei submissiveness, mara sio mwanamke peke yake anayetakiwa kuwa submissive, mara relatioship is not about one half being submissive to the other half...yani! ni ilimradi tu watetee 'stereotype' iliyoko ndani ya original post.KayScarpetta na huyu naye kabadilisha views kabisa... Sio mbaya tumefanya kazi nzuri. Kumbe na wanaume wanapaswa kuwa submissive eeh.... UngemQuote ruttashubanyuma toka mwanzo tusinge fika huku
Sina uhakika kama unamtambua na kumcha Mungu nikuwekee vifungu vya Biblia. Maana ungekuwa hivyo usingeandika hayo kwa herufi kubwa. Ila yatosha kukumbusha kwamba Mungu baada ya kumuumba Adam alimtoa ubavu akamuumba Eva (Hawa) wakaijaze dunia.mwengeso Kinyume cha uumbaji, unataka kusema vitabu vinasema lazima mtu aoe?? DO THE BOOKS ORDER US TO MARRY?? DO THEY DEMAND US TO REPRODUCE? Au una kitabu chako??
KayScarpetta: nimefafanua kwa kina maoni yangu tena kwa kurejea 'post' kuu, hapo awali (isome kwa umakini)
Sikubaliani na wazo la kuoanisha "submissive" na "ndoa". Sababu yoyote ya "living single" awe mwanamke au mwanaume ni kinyume kabisa cha ubinadamu katika mamlaka zote za utawala (fashism, democractic, socialism, etc) zilizopo duniani. Pia ni kinyume cha uumbaji.
Anayetetea kwamba akina mama wanaoishi pekee au kuzaa bila mme ati kwa sababu ndoa zinawafanya wawe "submissive" ni wapumbavu na lofa. Wawaulize waliozaliwa nje ya ndoa jinsi walivyohangaika kufika hapo walipo kwa sasa.
Utafiti umeonesha theluthi mbili za watoto wa mitaani ni wa wazazi wa mtu mmoja (single parent) kwa sababu mbalimbali lakini kubwa (>75%) ni wa akina mama waliozaa nje ya ndoa ambao nao huendelea kuzalisha watoto wa mitaani.
Je, mnapenda (housegirl, wewe na wengine wenye mawazo ya "ndoa = submissive) kuwa na Taifa la vijana wa mitaani. Naamini mmezaliwa ndani ya ndoa, pamoja na changamoto mlizoziona na kupitia!!
CHAMBUA CHUNGUZA AMUA CHUKUA HATUA
Hapo sasa cognitive dissonance... Ni pale mtu unapomsema mwenzako kwamba ana matatizo ya kisaikolojia kumbe na wewe ni muathirika kisaikolojia, hahaha.KayScarpetta useme wewe sasa, tena muandishi mzuri. nikisema mie wananiambia nina matatizo ya kisaikolojia.
Hata hawaeleweki. Nafikiri wana COGNITIVE DISSONANCE, you know, wanakubali uhuru wa wanawake Hawa lakini wako pressured na culture waliokulia.
Na kweli ingekuwa ni single men/fathers comments zingekuwa tofauti kabisa.... Kama hata wangeongelewa hao single men. Which is understandable, sio rahisi kuacha mapokeo uliyokuzwa nayo.
Lakini ukiwa na akili timamu na uwezo wa kuchambua mambo, hupaswi kuendeshwa na mapokeo yasiyo na faida, wala kuLable na kuBully watu kisa hawayafuati.
Sasa mtu kaamua hataki kuolewa. Wewe inakuAffect vipi mpaka umyooshee vidole kiasi hiki! Why should this even be a debate!!!! Ni umbea tu na mental cases
mwengeso Kinyume cha uumbaji, unataka kusema vitabu vinasema lazima mtu aoe?? DO THE BOOKS ORDER US TO MARRY?? DO THEY DEMAND US TO REPRODUCE? Au una kitabu chako??
Kinyume cha ubinadamu hayo ni mawazo yako peke yako. You're not any more human than Oprah INFACT I find Oprah more human than you in that she's spent her life helping the unfortunate, and not pressuring women to get married as if that's the only thing life has to offer.
Yote unayosema ni mawazo yako tu! Which are insignificant.
Hayo ya watoto wa mitaani, nachoona mimi ni maskini kuzaa wala sio single parents. Kama huna uwezo wa kutunza mtoto unazaa wa nini!!!!!
Kuwa single ni faida ya kujitambua?Mara post haiongelei submissiveness, mara sio mwanamke peke yake anayetakiwa kuwa submissive, mara relatioship is not about one half being submissive to the other half...yani! ni ilimradi tu watetee 'stereotype' iliyoko ndani ya original post.
Mimi kusema ukweli bado sielewi hawa wanasimamia nini. Maana hata ile hoja yao kwamba eti, u-singleness ni crime against humanity na eti kwamba ukiwa single basi uko lonely - that, to me, wont pass the logic test.
Mie naona hawa wenzetu wakubali tu kwamba trend ya mwanamke wa ulimwengu wa sasa kujitambua imekuwa 'mwiba' mkali sana kwa baadhi ya wanaume. Well, what can i say? it cant be helped... na bado, watajitambua mpaka wale akina mama makavishe wa masaseni rombo...teh teh teh i am soriiii...
Hakuna siku uchangudoa utakuwa 'norm' kwasababu hao mnaosema kuwa wanapenda kuwa single wanaishia kuwa machangudoa tu. Soma tafiti wanawake waliosoma USA ndiyo wanadumu kwenye ndoa lakini miaka iliyopita walikuwa kama wa waafrica walikuwa wanashindwa kutofauticha kati ya mwanamke kujitambua na maswala ya ndoa.Hapo sasa cognitive dissonance... Ni pale mtu unapomsema mwenzako kwamba ana matatizo ya kisaikolojia kumbe na wewe ni muathirika kisaikolojia, hahaha.
Mila na desturi kandamizi and or potofu ndio zinazochangia huku kuweweseka. Lakini kama ulivyosema housegirl, iweje mtu mwenye akili timamu, anayejitambua na anayetambua nafasi yake na nafasi ya wenzake hapa kwenye huu ulimwengu, akubali kusukumwa na desturi za namna hii!? Kuna desturi na tamaduni za ajabu kabisa ambazo kama sio binadamu wanaojitambua hapa duniani kuzikataaga, sijui leo nafasi ya binadamu duniani ingekuaje.
Wanachokifanya hapa hawa wenzetu, ni typical school ground bullying: kwamba hawa wako tofauti na sisi, hawafanyi kama sisi tunavyofanya, kwa hiyo wao sio kama sisi, kwa hiyo ni lazima wanamatatizo, tena matatizo ya kisaikolojia, waone, aibu zao, sijui nini...etc etc.
Na ni bullying pia kwasababu, comment zao hawa wenzetu zinaonyesha kwamba kuna a lot of 'ressentment' towards hawa wanawake wanaosemwa na mleta mada, ndio maana comments zao, hasa hizi za mwisho hapaa, zimejaa offensive words, insults and mockery... Why? Kisa tu mtu mwingine kaamua kuwa single!?
Hawa tuwaache tu mwanakwetu, kwasababu kuna mambo mengine mpaka yabadilike kabisa na kuwa 'norm' ni mpaka generations kadhaa zifutike, chukulia rennaissance forexample, ili-extend kutoka 14th century to 17th century, fikiria hapo ni vizazi vingapi vilifutika.