Mila nyingine Bwana!


ngoshwe

ngoshwe

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ngoshwe

ngoshwe

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Mila nyingine Bwana!.

Mke wangu anatokea kabila fulani kusini wa nchi yetu. Sina uwezo wa kutosha kiuchumi, tunaishi nyumba ya kupanga (Bonyokwa). Nyumba inavyumba viwili na sebule ambapo pana kochi moja tu na TV. Nyumba ina choo cha ndani cha sink la kukaa na pia kuna bafu humo humo.

Katikati ya mwezi uliopita, Mama mkwe kaja toka kijijini kwa ajili ya matibabu ya miguu, inamsumbua sana, ana lala chumba kimoja na watoto wetu. Cha kusikitisha, nimeonana nae ana kwa ana siku moja tu tokea aje kwenye. Siku zote huwa nikitoka kumsalimia anaitika huko huko chumbani, hataki tuonane sura, jana naelezwa na watoto eti "bibi" huwa anaenda kuoga na kujisaidia nyumba ya jirani yetu na mimi ninapofika tu akisikia mgurumo wa gari kama yupo sebuleni ana kimbilia chumbani!

Nauliza kwa nini anafanya hivi, waifu ananiambia eti kwa mila za kabila lao, ni aibu/ fedheha na sio ruksa kabsaaaa kwa mkwe (mzazi wa kike wa mke wangu), kufanya haya:

  1. Kusalimiana na na mkwewe (yaani mimi) kwa kutazamana usoni au kushikana mikono.
  2. Kutumia choo au bafu analotumia mkwewe (yaani mimi).
  3. Kukalia kiti alichokalia mkwewe.
  4. Kupishana kwa karibu na mkwewe
  5. Kukaa sebule na kuangalia TV mkwewe akiwa hapo hapo.
Nimetafakari sana, nika kumbua siku tatu zilizopita alikataa kuambatana nasi kwenda kupata "moja baridi moja moto" ...naouliza, naelezwa sio rahisi mama mkwe kukubali kukaa karibu yangu ......duh!

Hizi mila nyingine mboni mateso kwa sie akina yakhe!...
 
PakaJimmy

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PakaJimmy

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Ngoshwe,

I bet hujimaanishi wewe kweli-Kinda fiction!

Kimsingi mila kama hizi zipo, japokuwa kwa sasa zinazidi kupotea na kuwekwa kushoto kutokana na mwingiliano wa umagharibi zaidi unaoletwa na mfumo wa utandawazi.

Lakini kwa mamamkwe mwenye msimamo kabisa, mi sioni ajabu na hilo-ni kawaida, labda nyie wa dot.com mnaona hatari!

Mie mamaangu-mkwe, pamoja na kuja mjini marakwa mara, hawezi kunisalimia akiwa amekaa kwenye kiti au amesimama, ni mpaka akae chini(tukiwa nyumbani), au achuchumae kabisa ndipo atanisalimia!- so i dont see no wonder!

Nikiwa natoka kuoa miaka hiyo, alinambia asingekuwa free na mimi hadi nipate mtoto na bintiye, na kweli baada ya hapo ameimprove sana, uwoga umeenda down to 30%..lol!

Just cope with her, maana huwezi kumbadili overnight, au pia inaweza isiwezekane forever!
 
Chimunguru

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Chimunguru

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kwani wewe ngoshwe si mwafrika?
 
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Usijali. Mimi nimeoa mbena wa kutoka njombe. Mama mkwe akija hataki kutumia choo cha ndani. Anatumia bafu na choo vilivyoko servany quarters. Kusalimiana ananisalimu akichuchumaa wala haniangalii usoni. Mwaka wa kwanza wa ndoa yangu alipokuja dar mimi nilitoka chumbani kifua wazi na nimevaa kaptula shauri ya joto. Lo waifu aliruka kimanga na kunikokota kunirudisha bed room. Nikamuuliza vipi? Akaniambia "We bwana vipi unamtokea mama uchi?" Nikamuuliza uchi? Huoni nimevaa kwani uume wangu unaonekana. Akaniambia "Aisee kimila kule kwetu the way you adressed my dear husband you are naked". Basi nikaamua kujifunza. Kama hayupo naendelea na utamaduni wangu. Akija na mimi nakuwa mbena. Yaaani? Ah kwa vile wife bado nampenda bwana.
 
Chimunguru

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Usijali. Mimi nimeoa mbena wa kutoka njombe. Mama mkwe akija hataki kutumia choo cha ndani. Anatumia bafu na choo vilivyoko servany quarters. Kusalimiana ananisalimu akichuchumaa wala haniangalii usoni. Mwaka wa kwanza wa ndoa yangu alipokuja dar mimi nilitoka chumbani kifua wazi na nimevaa kaptula shauri ya joto. Lo waifu aliruka kimanga na kunikokota kunirudisha bed room. Nikamuuliza vipi? Akaniambia "We bwana vipi unamtokea mama uchi?" Nikamuuliza uchi? Huoni nimevaa kwani uume wangu unaonekana. Akaniambia "Aisee kimila kule kwetu the way you adressed my dear husband you are naked". Basi nikaamua kujifunza. Kama hayupo naendelea na utamaduni wangu. Akija na mimi nakuwa mbena. Yaaani? Ah kwa vile wife bado nampenda bwana.
Mkuu mshukuru mungu umeoa mbena, wana heshima sana hilo kabila, ulipenda boga penda na ua lake, na hizo ndizo mila zao ni watani wangu hao, hivi ungepata mama mkwe anayefikia baa ya jirani na kuagiza anachotaka na kurudi kwako saa nne ya usiku bwax, na asubuhi haamki shurti kwa supu na bia mbili?
 
The Boss

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usijali. Mimi nimeoa mbena wa kutoka njombe. Mama mkwe akija hataki kutumia choo cha ndani. Anatumia bafu na choo vilivyoko servany quarters. Kusalimiana ananisalimu akichuchumaa wala haniangalii usoni. Mwaka wa kwanza wa ndoa yangu alipokuja dar mimi nilitoka chumbani kifua wazi na nimevaa kaptula shauri ya joto. Lo waifu aliruka kimanga na kunikokota kunirudisha bed room. Nikamuuliza vipi? Akaniambia "we bwana vipi unamtokea mama uchi?" nikamuuliza uchi? Huoni nimevaa kwani uume wangu unaonekana. Akaniambia "aisee kimila kule kwetu the way you adressed my dear husband you are naked". Basi nikaamua kujifunza. Kama hayupo naendelea na utamaduni wangu. Akija na mimi nakuwa mbena. Yaaani? Ah kwa vile wife bado nampenda bwana.

mimi sio mbena.
Nimezaliwa dar na kukulia dar.
Lakini naamini kuvaa bukta na kukaa
kifua wazi mbele ya mzazi wako
au hata mzazi wa mke wako ni utovu
wa maadili.

Mambo ya bukta na kifua wazi
unapokuwa na mkeo tu na watoto wenu wadogo.
 
Saint Ivuga

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good tyme. na mm nitaoa mbena
 
ngoshwe

ngoshwe

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ngoshwe

ngoshwe

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good tyme. na mm nitaoa mbena

Hizi mila kwa maisha ya mjini zinatuongezea gharama na pengine aibu kwa majirani.

Mama mkwe akija inabidi awe na choo na bafu lake. Kwenda kujisaidia kwa jirani kisa kudunisha mila ni aibu na kero kwa majirani. Cha kusikitisha mama mkwe wangu japo ana niheshimu kihivi , lakini aliachana na mumewe long time ago na huko kijijini anaishia (kinyumba) na kijana mwenye umri mdogo kabisa kuliko mimi na hata mwanae wa kiume wa mwisho...., eti hajui kukataa mwanaume na ndo mana aliachika!
 
Annina

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Hizi mila kwa maisha ya mjini zinatuongezea gharama na pengine aibu kwa majirani.

Mama mkwe akija inabidi awe na choo na bafu lake. Kwenda kujisaidia kwa jirani kisa kudunisha mila ni aibu na kero kwa majirani. Cha kusikitisha mama mkwe wangu japo ana niheshimu kihivi , lakini aliachana na mumewe long time ago na huko kijijini anaishia (kinyumba) na kijana mwenye umri mdogo kabisa kuliko mimi na hata mwanae wa kiume wa mwisho...., eti hajui kukataa mwanaume na ndo mana aliachika!
Ngoshwe,
Mbona unachanganya habari? suala la maisha binafsi ya mama mkwe wako yana uhusiano gani na mila za kwao? Nadhani tujadili ulichokiwasilisha hapa - yaani suala la mila na sio mapungufu ya mama mkwe wako kwani halina uhusiano na mila na humtendei haki. Kama Bwana angehesabu maovu yetu nani angesimama?


Annina
 
The Boss

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The Boss

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hizi mila kwa maisha ya mjini zinatuongezea gharama na pengine aibu kwa majirani.

Mama mkwe akija inabidi awe na choo na bafu lake. Kwenda kujisaidia kwa jirani kisa kudunisha mila ni aibu na kero kwa majirani. Cha kusikitisha mama mkwe wangu japo ana niheshimu kihivi , lakini aliachana na mumewe long time ago na huko kijijini anaishia (kinyumba) na kijana mwenye umri mdogo kabisa kuliko mimi na hata mwanae wa kiume wa mwisho...., eti hajui kukataa mwanaume na ndo mana aliachika!

vijijini watu huoana kwa staili hiyo.
Hakuna harusi wala vikao.
Kwa hiyo usiseme anaishi kinyumba,
sema ameolewa na kijana mdogo.
 
Azikiwe

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Ha ha haaa, mimi mama mkwe natinga naye mpaka Club klm kawa.
 
Bujibuji

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Bujibuji

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Mila za bongo ni tamu sana.
Wacha tu ziendelee kudumishwa.
 
SMU

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SMU

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mimi sio mbena.
Nimezaliwa dar na kukulia dar.
Lakini naamini kuvaa bukta na kukaa
kifua wazi mbele ya mzazi wako
au hata mzazi wa mke wako ni utovu
wa maadili.

Mambo ya bukta na kifua wazi
unapokuwa na mkeo tu na watoto wenu wadogo.
Umesema vema!
 
SMU

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SMU

SMU

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Mila nyingine Bwana!.

Mke wangu anatokea kabila fulani kusini wa nchi yetu. Sina uwezo wa kutosha kiuchumi, tunaishi nyumba ya kupanga (Bonyokwa). Nyumba inavyumba viwili na sebule ambapo pana kochi moja tu na TV. Nyumba ina choo cha ndani cha sink la kukaa na pia kuna bafu humo humo.

Katikati ya mwezi uliopita, Mama mkwe kaja toka kijijini kwa ajili ya matibabu ya miguu, inamsumbua sana, ana lala chumba kimoja na watoto wetu. Cha kusikitisha, nimeonana nae ana kwa ana siku moja tu tokea aje kwenye. Siku zote huwa nikitoka kumsalimia anaitika huko huko chumbani, hataki tuonane sura, jana naelezwa na watoto eti "bibi" huwa anaenda kuoga na kujisaidia nyumba ya jirani yetu na mimi ninapofika tu akisikia mgurumo wa gari kama yupo sebuleni ana kimbilia chumbani!

Nauliza kwa nini anafanya hivi, waifu ananiambia eti kwa mila za kabila lao, ni aibu/ fedheha na sio ruksa kabsaaaa kwa mkwe (mzazi wa kike wa mke wangu), kufanya haya:

  1. Kusalimiana na na mkwewe (yaani mimi) kwa kutazamana usoni au kushikana mikono.
  2. Kutumia choo au bafu analotumia mkwewe (yaani mimi).
  3. Kukalia kiti alichokalia mkwewe.
  4. Kupishana kwa karibu na mkwewe
  5. Kukaa sebule na kuangalia TV mkwewe akiwa hapo hapo.
Nimetafakari sana, nika kumbua siku tatu zilizopita alikataa kuambatana nasi kwenda kupata "moja baridi moja moto" ...naouliza, naelezwa sio rahisi mama mkwe kukubali kukaa karibu yangu ......duh!

Hizi mila nyingine mboni mateso kwa sie akina yakhe!...
Ni kweli inawezekana baadhi ya mila hizi zimepitwa na wakati. Lakini ukizitizama kwa makini utaona busara iliyomo ndani ya mila hizi.

Nia hasa ya hili ni kujaribu ku-keep distance na mama mkwe (au watu wa aina yake). Inaondoa kwa kiasi kikubwa uwezekano wa 'kukwazana' kingono. Imagine umekaa na mama mkwe halafu kwenye Tv wanaonesha watu 'wanakulana denda' au kitu kingine kama hicho?

Ikaribu ambao watu 'walioendelea' wanautaka ndio huo unaleta kila aina ya vituko. Tumesikia humu watu wakilalamika kutegwa na wakwe zao nk. Yote haya yanakuwa rahisi kwa sababu ya huo ukaribu.
 
L

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Lwikunulo

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Mila hizi zipo na zina mizizi sana sometimez...

Mama mkwe wangu anakuja Dar occassionally na akija anakaa wiki mbili au tatu hivi, katika muda wote sijawahi kumwona akiwa amekaa sebuleni. Akijitahidi sana anakaa jikoni nikiwa sipo. Nikifika tu anatoka jikoni kwenda chumba chake cha kulala....in short haweza kuwa karibu nami kuongea japo hili na lile.

...ninaishi kwenye nyumba yangu ambayo haina servant quarter. Alipokuja kwa mara ya mwisho November 2009, mama mkwe wangu kanipiga mkwara kwamba next time hatakuja tena nyumbani kwangu kama sitajenga servant quarter! mkwara huo alinipiga kiaina (kama utani hivi..lakini message sent) siku nilipokua namwaga alipokua anaondoka kurudi kijijini hivi karibuni. Nd'o gharama za mila ati!!!!
 
Abunwasi

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Abunwasi

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Mila nyingine Bwana!.

Mke wangu anatokea kabila fulani kusini wa nchi yetu. Sina uwezo wa kutosha kiuchumi, tunaishi nyumba ya kupanga (Bonyokwa). Nyumba inavyumba viwili na sebule ambapo pana kochi moja tu na TV. Nyumba ina choo cha ndani cha sink la kukaa na pia kuna bafu humo humo.

Katikati ya mwezi uliopita, Mama mkwe kaja toka kijijini kwa ajili ya matibabu ya miguu, inamsumbua sana, ana lala chumba kimoja na watoto wetu. Cha kusikitisha, nimeonana nae ana kwa ana siku moja tu tokea aje kwenye. Siku zote huwa nikitoka kumsalimia anaitika huko huko chumbani, hataki tuonane sura, jana naelezwa na watoto eti "bibi" huwa anaenda kuoga na kujisaidia nyumba ya jirani yetu na mimi ninapofika tu akisikia mgurumo wa gari kama yupo sebuleni ana kimbilia chumbani!

Nauliza kwa nini anafanya hivi, waifu ananiambia eti kwa mila za kabila lao, ni aibu/ fedheha na sio ruksa kabsaaaa kwa mkwe (mzazi wa kike wa mke wangu), kufanya haya:

  1. Kusalimiana na na mkwewe (yaani mimi) kwa kutazamana usoni au kushikana mikono.
  2. Kutumia choo au bafu analotumia mkwewe (yaani mimi).
  3. Kukalia kiti alichokalia mkwewe.
  4. Kupishana kwa karibu na mkwewe
  5. Kukaa sebule na kuangalia TV mkwewe akiwa hapo hapo.
Nimetafakari sana, nika kumbua siku tatu zilizopita alikataa kuambatana nasi kwenda kupata "moja baridi moja moto" ...naouliza, naelezwa sio rahisi mama mkwe kukubali kukaa karibu yangu ......duh!

Hizi mila nyingine mboni mateso kwa sie akina yakhe!...
Ukipenda boga upende na ua lake baba
 
GreedyKenyan

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Mila nyingine Bwana!.

Mke wangu anatokea kabila fulani kusini wa nchi yetu. Sina uwezo wa kutosha kiuchumi, tunaishi nyumba ya kupanga (Bonyokwa). Nyumba inavyumba viwili na sebule ambapo pana kochi moja tu na TV. Nyumba ina choo cha ndani cha sink la kukaa na pia kuna bafu humo humo.

Katikati ya mwezi uliopita, Mama mkwe kaja toka kijijini kwa ajili ya matibabu ya miguu, inamsumbua sana, ana lala chumba kimoja na watoto wetu. Cha kusikitisha, nimeonana nae ana kwa ana siku moja tu tokea aje kwenye. Siku zote huwa nikitoka kumsalimia anaitika huko huko chumbani, hataki tuonane sura, jana naelezwa na watoto eti "bibi" huwa anaenda kuoga na kujisaidia nyumba ya jirani yetu na mimi ninapofika tu akisikia mgurumo wa gari kama yupo sebuleni ana kimbilia chumbani!

Nauliza kwa nini anafanya hivi, waifu ananiambia eti kwa mila za kabila lao, ni aibu/ fedheha na sio ruksa kabsaaaa kwa mkwe (mzazi wa kike wa mke wangu), kufanya haya:

  1. Kusalimiana na na mkwewe (yaani mimi) kwa kutazamana usoni au kushikana mikono.
  2. Kutumia choo au bafu analotumia mkwewe (yaani mimi).
  3. Kukalia kiti alichokalia mkwewe.
  4. Kupishana kwa karibu na mkwewe
  5. Kukaa sebule na kuangalia TV mkwewe akiwa hapo hapo.
Nimetafakari sana, nika kumbua siku tatu zilizopita alikataa kuambatana nasi kwenda kupata "moja baridi moja moto" ...naouliza, naelezwa sio rahisi mama mkwe kukubali kukaa karibu yangu ......duh!

Hizi mila nyingine mboni mateso kwa sie akina yakhe!...
Natoka jamii moja magharibi mwa Kenya (Luhya- second largest after Kikuyu). Mila zetu ni similar to what umeandika hapo. Mama mkwe wangu hawezi kulala nyumbani kwangu, hatusalamiani kwa mikono, jua haliwezi kutua likampata nyumbani kwangu. Mke wangu naye na baba yangu ni vivyo hivyo. Mama mkwe akitutembelea kutoka mashambani atalala kwa rafiki yangu. Baba yangu pia hawezi kulala nyumbani mwangu, aliacha kuingia chumbani mwangu nikiwa na miaka kama 14 hivi.
 

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