These rejected Valentine's Day cards somehow never made it to store shelves, I wonder why? I admire your strength, I admire your spunk, But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk. Our love will never become cold and hollow, Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow. I bought this Valentine's card at the store, In hopes that, later, you'd be my *****. This feels so good, it feels so right, I just wish it wasn't $250 a night. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class, Especially when I'm spanking, your big-fat ass. Before I met you, my heart was so famished, But now I'm fulfilled, SO MAKE ME A SAMICH! Through all the things that came to pass, Our love has grown, but so has your ass! You're a honey, and you're a cutie I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty". I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny, So, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny! If you think that hickey looks like a blister, You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!