Naomba kujuzwa, Kipi cha ajabu?????


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Ashangedere

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Ashangedere

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Huwa napata na mshangao siku hizi ninaposikia watu wakiwasema wenzao eti kisa wameamua kuachana na mke au mume, na kuwaona kama ni malaya kwa maamuzi hayo, kuna watu wanamsema kwa mfano JLO eti kwa nini amedivorce, hivi kweli jamani sisi kama great thinkers tunaona ni vema kuishi na mtu ambaye humpendi tena ambaye umejaribu kila njia kumuweka moyoni tena na umeshindwa?? je ni haki kuishi na mke/mume ambaye unajua fika anatoka na mtu mwingine nje ya ndoa, ni haki kuvumilia mtu unajua kabisa hakupendi?? sisi kama great thinkers tufike mahali tukubali maamuzi ya watu ambayo yako wazi na ndio wanachojisikia moyoni, ndio maana ndoa nyingi zimejifia siku nyingi lakini watu wanang'ang'ania kwa sababu wanaogopa jamii. kuna thread nimeona wanamtupia madongo jlo, lakini huyu dada naona ni bora kaacha kwanza ndio kaanza hayo mahusiano yake mapya, wangapi humu ndani mnacheat halafu mnajifanya wanandoa, hiyo ndio mungu anapenda?? binafsi napenda style ya JLO coz anafuata moyo wake na ndio raha ya maisha, jamani tunaishi mara moja tu, tabu ya nini?? kama hayajakukuta mshukuru mungu wako na endelea kuomba uendelee kuwa na upendo kwa umpendae nae akupende pia, je umewahi kujiuliza mwenzako akikuchukia kabisa na akataka kukuacha utafanyaje?? utakubali au utaiganda hiyo ndoa, maana huyo ni binadamu na anaweza kubadili akili saa yoyote, hata hivyo vitabu vimesema ndoa yaweza kuvunjika kwasababu ya kukosa uaminifu lakini kuna watu wameng'ang'ania tu kuvumilia huku wakisingizia kiapo walichokula, au labda tuongeze phrase kwenye kiapo cha ndoa tuseme kwenye kuchepuka pia tuvumilie...
 
Baba Erick

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Baba Erick

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kaondoe idiology ya western kwanza ndiyo uombe ushauri. Tambua ndoa pia ina-imarishwa na traditional ways of life or cultural ways! So Jl wana mfumo wao so ukitaka kuish it is fine.
 
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mi simo sina ndoa lakini nachukia kuachana
 
AshaDii

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Ashangedere… Umeongea kwa emotions saana thou umetumia J-Lo kama kivuli… Kuachana hakupendezi kabisa.. na tatizo sio kuachana katika jamii ya leo hii…. Tatizo limekua ufinyu wa ustahimilivu wa wanandoa na kukosa simile… maamuzi ya kuachana yako mdomoni badala ya tumboni… yakiwa tumboni inakua bora saana for mpaka ya tumboni yafike mdomoni… kazi ipo…

Kumekua ushindani mkubwa saana kati ya spouses… mke anataka kujiona yeye ndio yeye… mume nae hivo hivo… competition katika kila kitu… kila jambo … matendo na maamuzi pia, ndio maana lawama hizo zinakuwepo… Watu wanajidanganya saana kwa kufikiri kua akianachana na alo nae basi atapata bora zaidi… Sio kweli… wanadamu wooote wafanana.. in the sense wooote sio perfect na kuishi na kila mmoja inabidi u – compromise… However kuna mambo hayavumiliki ambapo kuachana kwa kweli is the only solution….
 
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Ashangedere… Umeongea kwa emotions saana thou umetumia J-Lo kama kivuli… Kuachana hakupendezi kabisa.. na tatizo sio kuachana katika jamii ya leo hii…. Tatizo limekua ufinyu wa ustahimilivu wa wanandoa na kukosa simile… maamuzi ya kuachana yako mdomoni badala ya tumboni… yakiwa tumboni inakua bora saana for mpaka ya tumboni yafike mdomoni… kazi ipo…

Kumekua ushindani mkubwa saana kati ya spouses… mke anataka kujiona yeye ndio yeye… mume nae hivo hivo… competition katika kila kitu… kila jambo … matendo na maamuzi pia, ndio maana lawama hizo zinakuwepo… Watu wanajidanganya saana kwa kufikiri kua akianachana na alo nae basi atapata bora zaidi… Sio kweli… wanadamu wooote wafanana.. in the sense wooote sio perfect na kuishi na kila mmoja inabidi u – compromise… However kuna mambo hayavumiliki ambapo kuachana kwa kweli is the only solution….
Ashadii ahsante umeniongelea mimi, once nikiamua kuolewa nimeamua, sababu hata nikimwona hanifai wakati mwanzo alinifaa na mwingine pia nitaona hivohivo, tena huyo wa pili na kuendelea itakuwa rahisi sana coz kama niliweza mara a kwanza kuacha huko kwengine ni cha mtoto tu..kwa kweli tuvumiliane tu kwenye mahusiano, labda ndio ukutane na mtu kama mtoa mada kaamua kukuacha huna jinsi
 
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kisukari

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kisukari

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kwa upande wangu mimi,nitavumilia mara ya kwanza na ya pili,ya 3 siwezi kuvumilia,maisha ni mafupi jamani.naelewa hakuna anependa kuacha au kuachwa,katika maisha niliyokulia nimejifunza ni ku work hard na usiwe tegemezi kwa mtu,anaeamua kuvumilia simlaumu na anaeamua kusonga mbele simlaumu.kwani naamini kabla ya maamuzi,unafikiria kwa undani zaidi.
 
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Ashadii ahsante umeniongelea mimi, once nikiamua kuolewa nimeamua, sababu hata nikimwona hanifai wakati mwanzo alinifaa na mwingine pia nitaona hivohivo, tena huyo wa pili na kuendelea itakuwa rahisi sana coz kama niliweza mara a kwanza kuacha huko kwengine ni cha mtoto tu..kwa kweli tuvumiliane tu kwenye mahusiano, labda ndio ukutane na mtu kama mtoa mada kaamua kukuacha huna jinsi

Wewe kama mwanamke ukiongea hivo... na ukiamini hivo basi nakwambia chances za ndoa yako kudumu ni kubwa saana.... For ina maana kama una kisomo, kazi ya maana, wadhifa wowote... vyoote utavivulia mlangoni ukirudi nyumbani kwako na mumeo.... Mengine yanakua ni mepesi - kikubwa kuheshimiana.... Na mimi hua naamini saana kua mwanamke ajishushe walau kiduchu (sio mpaka ampande... NO! ila tu kujenga heshima kua ni mumeo)
 
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Wewe kama mwanamke ukiongea hivo... na ukiamini hivo basi nakwambia chances za ndoa yako kudumu ni kubwa saana.... For ina maana kama una kisomo, kazi ya maana, wadhifa wowote... vyoote utavivulia mlangoni ukirudi nyumbani kwako na mumeo.... Mengine yanakua ni mepesi - kikubwa kuheshimiana.... Na mimi hua naamini saana kua mwanamke ajishushe walau kiduchu (sio mpaka ampande... NO! ila tu kujenga heshima kua ni mumeo)
Kwa kweli namini hivo kwa sasa mpaka further notice, maana nisiongelee saaaana wakati sijui hata inakuwaje kuishi na mtu maisha yote milele, lakini kwa mimi nikishaamua nitakuwa nimemaliza yooote labda tu aniache au awe anapiga sana hapo nahisi ndio pagumu
 
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kwa upande wangu mimi,nitavumilia mara ya kwanza na ya pili,ya 3 siwezi kuvumilia,maisha ni mafupi jamani.naelewa hakuna anependa kuacha au kuachwa,katika maisha niliyokulia nimejifunza ni ku work hard na usiwe tegemezi kwa mtu,anaeamua kuvumilia simlaumu na anaeamua kusonga mbele simlaumu.kwani naamini kabla ya maamuzi,unafikiria kwa undani zaidi.

Kisukari... sijui kama nakosea... but kama ukitumia neno kuvumilia... ina maana huyo mtu hamuishi nae vizuri, na hata hivo kuna mambo ya kuvumilia na kutovumilika hata mara moja yaaani inakubidi hapo hapo ufunge virago hata kama usiku wa manane....
 
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Kisukari... sijui kama nakosea... but kama ukitumia neno kuvumilia... ina maana huyo mtu hamuishi nae vizuri, na hata hivo kuna mambo ya kuvumilia na kutovumilika hata mara moja yaaani inakubidi hapo hapo ufunge virago hata kama usiku wa manane....
ni kweli kwa uliyosema asha dii
 
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[HR][/HR]jamani hakuna mtu anayependa kuachana na mwenzake,ujuwe kuna sababu tu.kwa aliyefunga ndoa kanisani anaambiwa kuhusu kuvumiliana,lakini mengine hayawezekani kuvumilia.mfano mkeo mmetoka wote mbele yako anajikomba kwa mwanaume mwingine je waweza kuvumilia hili?au kila mara mkeo kwenye mkoba wake unakutana na mipira ya kiume, je waweza kuvumilia?
 
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kuvumilia kupo ila siredi imelenga mbele mbele sana kiasi cha kwamba tamaduni za wenzetu na zetu tofauti
 
Nailyne

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mtu uliyeamua kuoana nae ni ngumu kuamua kuachana nae lakini kama alivyosema kisukari sishangai mtu akiamua kusepa maana huwezi jua,kuna vitu havivumiliki hata kama mnapendana kufa.., kuna couple naijua waliaachana sio kwa sababu hawapendani bt yule bwana alikuwa anampiga mkewe kwa visa vya kitoto kabisa, hadi leo jamaa anadai anampenda mkewe na mke aliko analia anasema anampenda yule mwanaume bt kuna siku kidogo afe kwa hiyo hathubutu kumrudia ingawa roho yamuuma!
 
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Unavumilia yanayovumilika, kama unapigwa mpaka kuzimia, au jamaa analeta wanawake ndani ukiwa haupo hapo mwenzangu huna budi kuangalia ustaarabu mwingine, kuna mambo huwa hayavumiliki, na jamii lazima itakuelewa koz wanayaona kwa macho yao
 
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Kweli nimeongea kwa emotions, ni kila mtizamo hapo juu uko sahihi kwa sababu tunatofautiana uwezo wa kuhimili /kuvumilia kutendwa, na wala msinichukulie naambatana na western culture hapana, kumbukeni hizo talaka hata kwa mababu zetu zilikuwepo saana, nafahamu mungu hapendi talaka lakini je mungu anapenda umcheat mkeo/mumeo?? mara ya kwanza ya pili ya tatu mpaka ya kumi awe anakusamehe tu?? halafu huyo anayetendwa akiamua kuondoka sisi jamii tunamuita malaya?? hii sio haki. kama hatupendi talaka na tuwe waaminifu kwa waume/wake zetu, tusiumizane, maisha mafupi sana kukaa na kuumizana.
 
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Ashangedere… Umeongea kwa emotions saana thou umetumia J-Lo kama kivuli… Kuachana hakupendezi kabisa.. na tatizo sio kuachana katika jamii ya leo hii…. Tatizo limekua ufinyu wa ustahimilivu wa wanandoa na kukosa simile… maamuzi ya kuachana yako mdomoni badala ya tumboni… yakiwa tumboni inakua bora saana for mpaka ya tumboni yafike mdomoni… kazi ipo…

Kumekua ushindani mkubwa saana kati ya spouses… mke anataka kujiona yeye ndio yeye… mume nae hivo hivo… competition katika kila kitu… kila jambo … matendo na maamuzi pia, ndio maana lawama hizo zinakuwepo… Watu wanajidanganya saana kwa kufikiri kua akianachana na alo nae basi atapata bora zaidi… Sio kweli… wanadamu wooote wafanana.. in the sense wooote sio perfect na kuishi na kila mmoja inabidi u – compromise… However kuna mambo hayavumiliki ambapo kuachana kwa kweli is the only solution….
Asante sana you said it hatuna uvumilivu kitu kidogo watu wanakimbilia kuachana pia tatizo jingine ni kila mtu kujiona ana maamuzi zaidi juu ya mwenzake
 
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Asante sana you said it hatuna uvumilivu kitu kidogo watu wanakimbilia kuachana pia tatizo jingine ni kila mtu kujiona ana maamuzi zaidi juu ya mwenzake


Hii unifanya nikumbuke ile topic ya 60/50... For a marriage to SURVIVE.... I wish i could remember that great Topic....
 
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Hii unifanya nikumbuke ile topic ya 60/50... For a marriage to SURVIVE.... I wish i could remember that great Topic....
Ila kuna yale ambayo kuyavumilia ni ngumu sana kama vile kupigwa
 
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Whenever you are confronted with an Opponent. Conquer them with love."
- Mahatma Gandhi -


Asante Ashadii
That one is the only solution;Amri iliyokuu ni Upendo(Mpende Mungu na Jirani kama unavyojipenda mwenyewe)
 

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