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Habari za Michezo na Burudani

Stars ni ushindi

Imeandikwa na Zena Chande; Tarehe: 25th March 2011 @ 23:59 Imesomwa na watu: 54; Jumla ya maoni: 0



Kikosi cha Taifa Stars





TIMU ya Soka ya Taifa, Taifa Stars leo itajitupa kwenye uwanja wa Taifa Dar es Salaam kumenyana na Afrika ya Kati katika mechi ya awali kuwania kufuzu fainali za Kombe la Mataifa Afrika mwakani.

Mechi hiyo ni ya vuta nikuvute kwani Stars inahitaji ushindi ili kujiweka sawa katika mbio hizo za kuwania fainali hizo zitakazofanyika Gabon na Equatorial Guinea.

Stars ilicheza mechi ya kwanza na Algeria na kutoka sare ya bao 1-1 kabla ya kufungwa bao 1-0 na Morocco nyumbani, hivyo mechi ya leo ni muhimu kushinda ili ianze mechi za marudiano ikiwa na imani ya kusonga mbele.

Kwa upande wa Afrika ya Kati, yenyewe ilitoka sare ya bila kufungana na Morocco na kuifunga Algeria mabao 2-0 hivyo timu hiyo inaongoza kundi hilo D ikiwa na pointi nne sawa na Morocco inayoshika nafasi ya pili.

Tanzania na Algeria zina pointi moja kila moja ambapo Tanzania iko nafasi ya tatu na Algeria nafasi ya nne kwenye msimamo wa kundi hilo.

Stars leo itaingia uwanjani huku ikiwakosa wachezaji wake wanaocheza soka ya kulipwa, Nizar Khalfani anayecheza Vancouver Whitecaps na Daniel Mrwanda na Abdi Kassim ‘Babi' wanaocheza Dong Tam Long An ya Vietnam.

Hata hivyo, Kocha mkuu wa Stars Jan Poulsen aliwaambia waandishi wa habari juzi kuwa pamoja na kuwakosa wachezaji hao lakini ushindi kwao ni muhimu.

Poulsen alisema Stars inahitaji ushindi kwa hali yoyote ile ili ijiweke pazuri hivyo anaimani kwamba timu itafanya vizuri kutokana na maandalizi mazuri waliyofanya na kuwataka mashabiki kuwaunga mkono ili waibuke na ushindi.

Kivumbi cha tuzo za Kili leo

Imeandikwa na Betram Lengama; Tarehe: 25th March 2011 @ 23:55 Imesomwa na watu: 14; Jumla ya maoni: 0








FAINALI za Tuzo za muziki za Kilimanjaro kwa mwaka huu zinafanyika leo kwenye ukumbi wa Diamond Jubilee ambapo kwa mara ya kwanza tuzo hizo zitapambwa na burudani za wasanii wa hapahapa nchini tofauti na miaka iliyopita.

Katika tuzo za mwaka huu wasanii wanaoibukia kama Abbas Hamis ‘20 Percent' na Belle 9 wanaonekana wana nafasi kubwa ya kung'ara katika tuzo hizi kutokana na kupata nafasi ya kuwania tuzo hizo katika makundi matatu kati ya makundi sita.

Msanii 20 percent anawania tuzo ya Msanii wa Bora Muziki wa Kiume wa mwaka, Mwimbaji Bora wa Kiume na Wimbo Bora wa mwaka ambao katika kundi hilo ameingiza nyimbo mbili ambazo ni Ya Nini Malumbano naTamaa Mbaya.

Wakati Belle 9 yumo kwenye kundi la Msanii Bora wa muziki wa Kiume, Mwimbaji Bora wa Kiume na pia wimbo wake wa ‘We ni Wangu'unawania tuzo ya wimbo bora wa R&B wa mwaka.

Wasanii walioteuliwa kuwania tuzo ambazo zinahusisha Mwimbaji Bora wa Kiume, Mwimbaji Bora wa Kike, Msanii Bora wa Kike wa Muziki na Msanii Bora wa Muziki wa Kiume,Wimbo Bora wa Taarabu, Wimbo Bora wa mwaka na Wimbo Bora wa Kiswahili wa Bendi na Msanii mpya anayechipukia wamegawanywa katika makundi ambayo yanahusisha majina matano, mpaka sita ya wasanii.

Tuzo hizo pia zinashirikisha wasanii watano kutoka nchi za Afrika Mashariki, ambao watashindania kuwania tuzo ya wimbo bora ya mwaka nyimbo ambazo zimechaguliwa kuwania tuzo hiyo ni za ‘Nitafanya' wa Kidumu akimshirikisha Lady Jay Dee, ‘Songambele' wa Alfa wa Rwanda akimshirikisha AY, ‘Kare' wa kundi la P-Unit na Vuvuzela wa GoodLife na Kasepiki wa Bebe Cool wa Uganda.

Yafuatayo ni makundi ya tuzo na wasanii ambao watakuwa kwenye ukumbi wa Diamond Jubilee wakiwania kutangazwa washindi wa tuzo hizo, Tuzo ya msanii bora wa kike wa mwaka inawaniwa na Lady Jay Dee, Mwasiti, Shaa na Khadija Kopa.

Msanii bora wa kiume wa mwaka 20 Percent, Ali Kiba, Barnabas, Diamond, Ambwene Yesaya ‘AY' na Belle 9 na tuzo ya Mwimbaji bora wa Kiume inawaniwa na 20 Percent, Barnabas, Kiba, Banana Zorro, Belle 9 na Diamond.

Tuzo ya wimbo bora wa mwaka itakuwa inawaniwa na nyimbo za Mama Ntilie wa Gelly wa Ryme akiwashirikisha AT na Ray C, Sina Raha wa Sam wa Ukweli, Ya Nini Malumbano na Tamaa Mbaya za 20 Percent na Mkono Mmoja wa Chege na Temba wakimshirikisha mwanadada Wahu kutoka Kenya.

Tuzo ya wimbo bora wa muziki wa Taarab unawaniwa na wimbo ya My Valentine na Langu Rohoni za kundi la Jahazi modern Taarab,Top in Town wa malkia wa mipasho Khadija Kopa, Acheni Kuniandama na Mama Nipe Radhi za Isha Ramadhani.

Wimbo bora wa R&B wa mwaka We ni Wangu- Belle 9, Nikikupata- Ben Poul, Hello- Hussein Machozi ft Maunda Zorro, Atatamani- Linah na Kisiwa cha Malavidavi- Z-Anto wakati tuzo ya wimbo bora wa mwaka wa Hip-hop inawaniwa na Fid Q akiwa na wimbo wake wa Propaganda, Karibu Tena- Joh Makini, Ukisikia Paah- JCB ft Fid Q& Chidi Benz na Usije Mjini- AY& Mwana FA.

Wimbo bora wa Kiswahili wa mwaka :Shika Ushikapo- Mapacha Watatu ft Mzee Yusuph,
Laptop- Extra Bongo, Kauli- Twanga Pepeta na Pongezi kwa Wanandoa- Akudo, Wimbo bora wa Reggae Sauti ya rasta- Ras Rwanda Magere, Misingi ya Rasta- Warriors from the East, Sayuni- Jhiko Man na Ujio Mpya- Hardmad ft Enika & BNV.

Wimbo bora wa Ragga/Dancehall:Nimefulia-Benjamin wa Mambo Jambo ft AT Action- CPWAA, Dully, Ngwear, Ms Triniti, Far Away- Big Jah Man ft Richard, My Friend- Benjamin na Kiuno Weka Busy- Jet Man.

Rapa bora wa mwaka wa muziki wa dansi: Fergsuon, Khalid Chokaraa, Totoo ze Bingwa, Kitokololo na Msafiri Diouf na tuzo ya Msanii bora wa Hip-hop: Fid Q, Joh Makini, Ngwear, Chidi Benz na Godzilla.

Na tuzo ya mwisho ni ile ya wimbo bora wa Afrika Mashariki: Nitafanya- Kidumu & Lady Jaydee,Kare- P-Unit,Songa mbele- Alpha ft AY, Vuvuzela- Goodlife, Kasepiki- Bebe Cool.

Nchimbi kufungua mkutano Mkuu TFF

Imeandikwa na Mwandishi Wetu; Tarehe: 25th March 2011 @ 23:50 Imesomwa na watu: 24; Jumla ya maoni: 0








SHIRIKISHO la Soka Tanzania (TFF) leo linatarajia kufanya mkutano wake mkuu wa mwaka 2010 kwenye ukumbi wa NSSF Water Front, Dar es Salaam.

Kwa mujibu wa Ofisa Habari wa TFF, Boniface Wambura mkutano huo utafunguliwa na Waziri wa Habari, Vijana, Utamaduni na Michezo Emmanuel Nchimbi saa tatu asubuhi.

Alisema mkutano huo utakaokuwa na ajenda 16 utamalizika kesho na kwamba tayari wajumbe wa mkutano huo wameshawasili jijini.

Alizitaja ajenda hizo kuwa ni Kufungua kikao, kuthibitishwa kwa wajumbe wa Mkutano Mkuu, kusoma na kuthibitisha ajenda, kuthibitisha muhtasari wa kikao cha Mkutano Mkuu uliopita, Yatokanayo na muhtasari wa kikao kilichopita.

Nyingine ni hotuba ya Rais, kupokea taarifa za utekelezaji za wanachama, kupitisha taarifa za utekelezaji wa Kamati ya Utendaji, kupitisha taarifa ya Ukaguzi wa Hesabu za mwaka uliopita, kupitisha taarifa ya wakaguzi na hatua zilizochukuliwa, kupitisha bajeti ya mwaka 2011, uchaguzi wa nafasi zilizo wazi, kupitisha mapendekezo ya marekebisho ya Katiba ya TFF (kujadili mikoa mipya), kujadili mapendekezo yaliyowasilishwa na wanachama au Kamati ya Utendaji, Mengineyo na Kufunga kikao.

New Zealand add final chapter to Graeme Smith's tales of woe

• New Zealand 221-8; South Africa 172
• Graeme Smith bows out as captain on another World Cup low

• Andy Bull in Mirpur
• guardian.co.uk, Friday 25 March 2011 20.15 GMT <li class="history">Article history New Zealand's Jacob Oram, centre, celebrates with team mates after taking the wicket of the South Africa captain Graeme Smith. Photograph: Daniel Berehulak/Getty Images It is a word traditionally associated with South African cricket. Five letters long, rhymes with yoke, begins with "C". A real cliche. And it is going to be hard for anyone to describe this quarter-final without using it. For 76 overs they were in control of the match. New Zealand had been held to an underwhelming total of 221. After cruising through the first half of their innings South Africa needed 102 runs from 23 overs and had seven wickets in hand. Easy. And then everything fell apart.
  In the next 10 overs five wickets fell for 25 runs. Soon after, the game was up. One of the strongest and most fancied teams in the tournament were out, and New Zealand, nobody's favourites, had taken their place in the semi-finals.
  Credit to them, their fielding was exceptional, their batting solid and their bowling sharp. But Graeme Smith's side will know this was a game they should have won. As the wickets tumbled their players and coaching staff sat out front of the dressing room, some running their hands through their hair, others staring at the ground, an atmosphere of disbelief and anger lying thick over all. "I always felt that 222 was very getable," said Smith. So did everyone else.
  New Zealand's total had been built around Jesse Ryder, a batsman who has been typecast as an irresponsible rogue but who here scored a restrained and resolute 83 from 121 balls. As slow as his stand of 114 with Ross Taylor seemed at the time, it turned out to be the defining partnership of the match. When the two tried to accelerate they crashed, both caught in the deep. Kane Williamson added 38 spritely runs in the final few overs, but no one else contributed anything much of note, in fact Scott Styris, who made 16, was the only other player to reach double figures.
  But in a way that low total worked to New Zealand's advantage. Daniel Vettori said they knew the only way to defend such a low score was to take 10 wickets, and so he decided to attack, abandoning any thought of saving runs.
  He opened with two spinners, only the fourth time in the history of one-day international cricket a team has done so. They had a little luck at first, Hashim Amla was caught in the first over as a cut ricocheted off the wicketkeeper's foot and shot to slip. That brought out Jacques Kallis, and he bedded in. He put on 61 with Smith, who then cut the ball straight to point, and 39 with AB de Villiers.
  If there was a single moment that turned the game it was the catch that removed Kallis, a brilliant running effort from Jacob Oram. JP Duminy then offered an execrable shot to Nathan McCullum and was bowled. Two balls later De Villiers was crazily run out and all of a sudden the pressure was suffocating South Africa.
  A fracas broke out that may cost New Zealand, as the match referee is investigating Vettori's aggressive behaviour. Then Oram bowled Johan Botha and had Robin Peterson caught behind. Despite Francois du Plessis' valiant slogging, the game had slipped away.
  This was Smith's last match as one-day captain. He took over the job eight years ago after the team were farcically knocked out of the 2003 World Cup because they misread a Duckworth-Lewis sheet. This loss was not as ignominious as that, but for Smith it was still a sorry way to end. South Africa's World Cup scars run deep, and for all his other achievements he has not been able to heal them.
  
  

Kibaden apewe mikoba ya Phiri Send to a friend Thursday, 24 March 2011 20:09 0diggsdigg

Clara Alphonce
UONGOZI wa Simba umemteua Abdallah Kibaden 'Mputa' kuiongoza timu hiyo katika kipindi hiki ambacho kocha Patrick Phiri akisumbuliwa na matatizo ua kifamilia nyumbani kwao Zambia.

Baada ya mchezo wa Lubumbashi dhidi ya TP Mazembe na kushudia Simba ikipokea kipigo cha mabao 3-1, kocha Phiri aliomba kupita nyumbani kwao Zambia kwa ajili ya kwenda kumuuguza mkewe, lakini hadi jana alipotarajiwa kurudi ameshindwa kufanya hivyo.
Akizungumza jijini jana Mwenyekiti wa Simba, Aden Rage alisema kutokana na udhuru wa kocha huyo, Kamati ya Utendaji ya klabu hiyo iliyokutana juzi imeamua kumkabidhi timu kocha Kibaden kutokana na ugumu wa mechi yao ya marudiano dhidi ya TP Mazembe.

"Mechi inayotukabili ni ngumu hivyo kamati imeona ni vyema timu akakabidhiwa Kibaden, na hata kama Phiri atarejea nchini basi Mputa atakuwa kocha msaidizi wa timu hiyo, pamoja Amour Awadhi wa Oman atakuwa kocha wa makipa ikiwa ni moja ya mbinu za kuimarisha benchi la ufundi," alisema Rage.

Kibaden aliyeiongoza Simba kucheza fainali ya Ligi ya Mabingwa mwaka 1993, atakuwa na kibarua kigumu cha kuhakikisha mabingwa hao wa Tanzania wanapata ushindi hapo Aprili 3 kwenye mchezo wa marudiano dhidi ya TP Mazembe.

Simba inahitaji kushinda mabao 2-0 kwenye mchezo huo wa marudiano uliopangwa kuchezwa saa tisa mchana katika Uwanja wa Taifa, Dar es Salaam ili kujihakikishia kufuzu kwa hatua ya makundi.
Rage aliongeza kikubwa kwa sasa ni kuwataka Watanzania wote kujitokeza kwa wingi uwanjani na kuwaunga mkono ili waweze kushinda.

"Tulipofika Congo mashabiki wote wakiwemo wapinzani wakubwa wa TP Mazembe, timu FC Lupopo ambao tulidhani watakuwa upande wetu, waliweka uzalendo mbele na kuwashangilia wapinzani wetu, na sisi tulipata sapoti ndogo kutoka kwa Watanzania waliotokea maeneo ya jirani," alisema

Alisema wanaamini kabisa kuwa wanaweza kuwatoa TP Mazembe katika michuano hiyo kutokana na historia nzuri ya timu yao ambayo imekuwa ikiwatoa mabingwa tangu miaka ya 74.

Aliwataja waamuzi watakaochezesha mchezo huo kuwa wanatoka Shelisheli wakati kamisaa anatokea nchini Kenya.



Comments




0 #1 ramadhani 2011-03-25 18:10 siyo watuu kujaaa uwanjani ...mipango makini mnafanya..siyo domo tuu!watz.
Quote

Poulsen amkomalia Samatta mazoezini Send to a friend Thursday, 24 March 2011 20:06

Calvin Kiwia
KOCHA wa Taifa Stars, Jan Poulsen ameoneka kutumia muda mwingi kwenye mazoezi ya timu hiyo inayofanya kwenye Uwanja wa Taifa kumwelekeza mshambuliaji chipukizi wa Simba, Mbwana Samatta jinsi ya kuwatoroka mabeki na kufunga mabao kirahisi.

Kutokana na kocha huyo kutumia muda mwingi kumwelekeza Samatta ni dhahiri chipukizi huyo akaanzishwa kwenye kikosi cha kwanza kwenye mchezo wa kesho dhidi ya Afrika ya Kati wa kutafuta tiketi ya kufuzu Fainali za Afrika 2012 zitakazoandaliwa kwa pamoja kati ya Gabon na Guinea Ikweta. Mechi hiyo itachezwa kesho kwenye Uwanja wa Taifa jijini Dar es Salaam.

Katika maelekezo hayo, Samatta alionekana kuyashika kwa haraka lakini hakuweza kufunga goli hata moja na kuambulia kupiga mashuti mawili yalimgonga beki, Nadir Haroub 'Cannavaro' katika mazoezi hayo.

Vile vile kocha huyo alionekana kumtumia zaidi beki wa kulia wa Simba, Haruna Shamte kwa ajili ya kupiga krosi na kumtaka Samatta na Machupa kuzifunga lakini kati ya krosi tatu alizopiga Shamte hazikupa wakuzifunga.

Kocha msaidizi wa timu hiyo, Silvestre Marsh aliliambia Mwananchi wamekuwa wakitumia muda mwingi kwa kuwaelekeza wachezaji kucheza kwenye nafasi uwanjani na kufunga mabao.

"Zoezi hili tumekuwa tukilirudia mara kwa mara kwa malengo ya kupata mabao mengi katika mchezo wetu na Afrika ya Kati, tunaimani kufanikiwa kwa kiasi kikubwa kwa hili," alisema Marsh.

Quarter-final, Mirpur

New Zealand v South Africa - as it happened

The Kiwis moved into the last four after an astonishing choke from the South Africans in Mirpur

• Rob Smyth and Alan Gardner
• guardian.co.uk, Friday 25 March 2011 08.00 GMT <li class="history">Article history The immutable law of World Cups &#8211; New Zealand will overachieve. Photograph: Saurabh Das/AP Preamble Morning. Who says 50-over cricket has nothing new to offer? This fascinating competition will enter virgin territory today, when either South Africa and New Zealand will win a World Cup knockout game for the first time. The fact they have not done so before is pretty staggering, even if it is not quite the statgasm we might think. This is only the second World Cup to have quarter-finals, so there haven't been that many knockout games down the years: this is the 34th in total, of which six have been lost by New Zealand and four by South Africa.
  
  Since South Africa's readmission to international cricket, the two sides have strikingly similar records. They were semi-finalists in 1992, 1999 and 2007; they were quarter-finalists in 1996; and they failed to reach the knockout stages in 2003. Yet a more relevant comparison might be between South Africa and another New Zealand team: the rugby boys, who have also found umpteen weird and wonderful ways not to win a World Cup.
  If South Africa discover another today, in a match they should win, a popular C-word may well be trending on a social networking site near you. (Insert your own 'and chokers will be trending too' joke here.)
  The winners of this match will play either Sri Lanka or England in Colombo on Tuesday. This will be played before the India v Pakistan semi-final. Scandalous, clearly, but all part of the plan from cricket's governing body, the BCCI, to ensure that India win.
  An early email, from Guy Collier "So this isn't exactly to do with the cricket but stick with me and I will do my best to bring it around. I am currently running a social experiment to see what happens when we open up questions of identity and move away from the traditional tick box approach you see in the census form &#8211; and if one small boy, albeit one who is actually 6ft tall and 30, can run a census from his bedroom using just social media. And the power of OBO cricket.
  "I am looking for any and all plugs to encourage people to state on Twitter #altcensus today I am.... I will gather all the statements to see how they compare to the national census. If anyone has any questions they can check www.alternativecensus.org.uk. So here is my tenuous cricket link: what box do half the England cricket team tick when asked about national identity...? Maybe if they took part in the Alternative Census we could find out!"
  The power of OBO cricket. Arf!
  South Africa at the World Cup
  Group stages: P42 W30 L11 T1 (Win percentage: 71)
  Knockout games: P4 W0 L3 T1 (Win percentage: 0)
  New Zealand at the World Cup
  Group stages: P61 W39 L22 (Win percentage: 64)
  Knockout games: P6 W0 L6 (Win percentage: 0)
  New Zealand have won the toss and will bat first. I think they had to do that to have a realistic chance of victory. That sets this game up beautifully. If they put 250 on the board, chase won't be the only CH-word we'll be mentioning as South Africa's batsmen go about their business.
  Both sides have picked three frontline spinners. Daniel Vettori returns to the side, even though he is not fully fit, and the left-armer Luke Woodcock also comes in, with James Franklin omitted. South Africa have Johan Botha, Imran Tahir and Robin Peterson, while the big three &#8211; Dale Steyn, Morne Morkel and AB de Villiers &#8211; return after sitting out the final group games against Bangladesh. Morne van Wyk misses out as a result.
  New Zealand Guptill, B McCullum (wk), Ryder, Taylor, Styris, Williamson, Vettori, N McCullum, Oram, Southee, Woodcock.
  South Africa Smith (c), Amla, Kallis, de Villiers (wk), Duminy, du Plessis, Botha, Peterson, Steyn, Morkel, Tahir.
  As these two are serial losers in the World Cup knockout stages, here is some encouragement for them from one of the most inspiring figures ever to bestride this earth. Ignore the bit at the top right of the video.
  Morning people Who are these weird "morning people" I keep seeing? They're a menace to society with their walking, talking and general 6am sentience. My alarm has been going off before 5.30 and 6 throughout this World Cup, and I've not felt so consistently violated since I inexplicably watched most of the first season of Gossip Girl in one hit. Why would anyone get up at such an hour, never mind seem so jaunty and busy? Yes we all admire your lust for life and the incontrovertibly superior energy content of your diet, but please don't rub in our face, at least not before midday.
  Thankfully the Guardian power-showers are one of the best things that have ever happened to anyone, ever, so I now feel vaguely human. But I still don't understand these strange "morning people". They're worse than the paediatricians. There's even a guide how to be a morning person. No thanks!
  1st over: New Zealand 2-0 (Guptill 1, B McCullum 1) South Africa open with a spinner, as usual. How odd it is to type that sentence. Today it's Robin Peterson rather than Johan Botha and his first over, played cagily, brings just a couple of singles. "Can today's match officially be termed a west London derby?" says Elliot Carr-Barnsley. "Also, cracking article by Selvey on Yardy's depression." It was. Selve is in storming form at the moment.
  2nd over: New Zealand 5-0 (Guptill 1, B McCullum 4) Dale Steyn's first ball is driven urgently through extra cover for three by Brendon McCullum. Those are the only runs from the over, although one delivery to Guptill bounces twice before reaching the keeper, a reflection of the pace of this pitch. New Zealand have beaten South Africa at the last two World Cups, famously so in 2003 when Stephen Fleming played an awesome innings; they are not the same side these days, but don't write them off, at least not until they collapse to 40 for seven. They certainly have a puncher's chance now that they are batting first. "Hold your horses Smyth, my boy," says Andrew Jobson. "In the (admittedly unlikely) event of the match being abandoned, the higher-ranked team (SA) progresses. So New Zealand would be knocked out, and SA could then get beaten in the semi by the winner of SL-Eng, preserving both teams' winless records."
  WICKET! New Zealand 5-1 (B McCullum ct and b Peterson 4) A sensational return catch from Robin Peterson gets rid of the dangerman Brendon McCullum. He danced down the track but was done by a bit of extra bounce and pushed the ball back to the left of Peterson, who dived and then extended a telescopic arm to take a wonderful catch. He took an unbelievable catch off his own bowling earlier in the tournament to dismiss Ian Bell, and this was comparable. Brilliant stuff.
  3rd over: New Zealand 6-1 (Guptill 1, Ryder 1) Robin Peterson is having quite a tournament. "This is it, isn't it?" says Duncan Bonnett. "I've spent the whole of last night and this morning not laughing at the Aussies in case it comes back to bite my boys as karmic revenge. We need to get into the Kiwi middle order quickly, or I'm afraid the ahem, nerves, will start to jangle out there. On paper, we're too strong for the Kiwis, but what if they pick scissors instead of rock?" Could make a 'Dale Stone' joke. Doesn't really work. Dale Stone!
  4th over: New Zealand 14-1 (Guptill 1, Ryder 8) An unusually sloppy over from Steyn includes a low full toss and a leg-side wide to Ryder, who then inside edges a hot inswinger to fine leg for four. These are very dangerous times for New Zealand, who could fold if they lose another one here. Ryder ends the over by clunking a pull over mid on for three. "Please can we have early mention for what I expect to be the star of today's game?" says Neil Withers. "I am of course referring to Daniel Vettori's amazing moustache &#8211; I saw it last night on TV and couldn't stop laughing! It's the finest display of slug-balancing since Baldrick."
  5th over: New Zealand 15-1 (Guptill 1, Ryder 9) The offspinner Johan Botha replaces Robin Peterson. As Mark Nicholas says on Sky, Graeme Smith is loving captaining a side with so many options. It's like going from the basic five channels to the full Sky+ experience, or so I'd imagine if I had Sky. Botha so nearly zips a quicker one through Ryder, who gets a very late inside edge. One from a very good over. South Africa have been seriously impressive thus far. "Morning people have just taken the next logical step from pretending they didn't want to come to the party you didn't invite them to," says Dan Smith. "They couldn't come to that party, or indeed any other event you wouldn't want them at, because they need to be up bright and early for a granola-fuelled jog to the office. I spit in their carrot juice."
  WICKET! New Zealand 16-2 (Guptill c Botha b Steyn 1) This is too easy for South Africa. Steyn dupes Guptill with a lovely slower ball, and he drives it high in the air to mid off, where Botha takes a nonchalant running catch.
  6th over: New Zealand 16-2 (Ryder 10, Taylor 0) In their last World Cup knockout game, the 2007 semi-final, South Africa lost the match inside 10 overs. They might have won this one by the 10th over. They have been outstanding. "You can rail against morning people all you want," says Peter Hanes, "but never forget that they're the ones that ensure that the supermarket is stocked with fish fingers by the time you get there."
  7th over: New Zealand 17-2 (Ryder 10, Taylor 1) One from another crafty Botha over. New Zealand are in all sorts of bother, already. "Yesterday's link to the freak yoga instructor and his rooster was bad enough, but linking to Nick Berry singing that execrable dirge is going too far," says Martin Sinclair. "I'd rather complete my census than sit through that twaddle!"
  8th over: New Zealand 24-2 (Ryder 16, Taylor 2) Morkel replaces Steyn, and Ryder flays a full delivery square on the off side for four. Good shot. "If you want to become a morning person it is simple - have a small child (yes yes I know, OBO readers, but even Millings has managed)," says Robin Hazlehurst. "You will get up at ungodly hours for several years and eventually get used to it. Option two, be a small child, they are certainly morning people. You were probably one too once, you just don't remember."
  9th over: New Zealand 27-2 (Ryder 17, Taylor 3) Crikey, Danny Morrison has entered the commentary box and is now using that soft, ticklish voice of his. I bet he whispers the sweetest nothings. Botha bowls a leg-side wide and then Ryder pushes a single to mid off. NZ bat a long way down &#8211; Oram is down to come in at No9 &#8211; so there's no need to panic just yet. But they need to find a bowler to target, and I'm not sure there are any. "I don't really get why anyone would want to get up early every day," says Guy Hornsby. "It's a necessity in order to pay the bills, to top up the supply of Liver Compromiser. The sort of people that do it are the preternaturally happy people &#8211; like children's TV presenters &#8211; that talk in awful lingo: work/life balance, working 'clever', maximising your potential, living life to the full. I just got a bit of sick in my mouth from that. There are so few jobs that would make you want to do that. Astronaut? Actor? International playboy? OBO writer? I bet Hugh Hefner doesn't get up in the morning. And yes, I'm hungover." I just typed 'children's TV presenter' into google, and look what was the second result.
  10th over: New Zealand 34-2 (Ryder 24, Taylor 3) Ryder spanks another square drive for four off Morkel, despite or perhaps because of the presence of Kallis at short point. It went through his legs in fact. Ryder then pulls through square leg for three. He's a dangerous customer, and he looks in the mood to give it some humpty. "I'm a Kiwi watching in Wellington," says Cat Doran. "Expecting an early night once we implode." Now that's what I call confidence.
  11th over: New Zealand 36-2 (Ryder 25, Taylor 4) "Any tips on getting my colleagues in Norway to embrace the majestic game that is cricket (even if it is the pyjama format)?" says Al Weeks. "I can't see why it's not a big hit here already, the climate is perfect for it and with the recent performance of minor nations they've probably got a chance of putting an ad hoc team together and giving England a close game." Show them lots of videos of Viv. He was even cooler than your average Scandinavian, so they'll surely recognise the swagger.
  12th over: New Zealand 47-2 (Ryder 33, Taylor 5) Peterson is back for Morkel, who took a little bit of abuse from Ryder. As does Peterson when a widish delivery is clattered through the covers for four. He gets four more to the same area off the last ball of the over, this time with a cut stroke. Ryder looks dangerous. "What a great start by the South Africans," says George Miller. "Peterson has really been a revelation for us in the WC. Although we are supposed to working on three papers (tomorrow, Sunday and Monday), production has pretty much ground to a halt."
  13th over: New Zealand 50-2 (Ryder 34, Taylor 7) Imran Tahir is going to bowl. He has stunning record in this tournament &#8211; 12 wickets at an average of 9.83 &#8211; and his second ball is a delicious googly that beats Ryder all ends up. Three from the over. "Rob old chap, am I the only one picking up a bit of, umm, Kenneth Williams campness in your commentary this morning?" says Steve Hudson. "Lovely man paunch? Danny M's whispered sweet nothings? If you're building up to a frank admission of some sort, just let me tell you that the OBO crew will be very supportive. After all, there's no room for intolerance in the world of online bilge these days. We'll tolerate anything. Clearly."
  14th over: New Zealand 53-2 (Ryder 35, Taylor 9) Three singles from Peterson's over. "Oh come on all you townies, out here in the wilds of Oxonshire there is the dawn chorus (coming in strong at about 0500 currently but set to move earlier)," says Angus Doulton. "Exactly what is needed to fortify one for a morning's OBO humour. Actually even in the midst of town, you'd be surprised what a few blackbirds can do to support the critical first mug of tea." I wish I was in bed. Normally, if you wake up early by accident, you can spend an hour moseying around, then get an extra nap in and still be up for midday when the day formally begins.
  15th over: New Zealand 57-2 (Ryder 36, Taylor 12) There's more chance of Lord Henry Manners of Mannersville zestily picking his nose at the dinner table than there is of Ryder picking Tahir. He hasn't got a clue, but he's getting away with it for now. Taylor isn't entirely comfortable either and he gets a leading edge that falls safely on the off side.
  "In the 6th over, when it was 16-2, you said that South Africa could have this game won by the 10th over," says Luke Dealtry. "It's now the 13th over and the Kiwis are 50-2. CHOKERS!" You said the word. You're not supposed to do that. If you say the C-word five times in a mirror, terrible things will happen.
  16th over: New Zealand 58-2 (Ryder 37, Taylor 12) The returning Morkel's first ball is belaboured towards backward point by Ryder, and Duminy saves four with a brilliant diving save. Just one from the over, but this has been a decent comeback from New Zealand. Their tactic should be to just stay in the game as long as possible and hope that the asphyxiating pressure does for South Africa later on. It goes against all logic, but I think New Zealand have got a real chance today. "A question for OBO readers," says Steve Kerr. "Does anyone know of a London pub showing the Crusaders/Sharks Super XV game live on Sunday? Obviously can't be arsed going to Twickenham and will donate independently here."
  17th over: New Zealand 61-2 (Ryder 39, Taylor 13) New Zealand must find a way to impose themselves on Tahir, which is easier typed from thousands of miles away than done. Just three from the over, which is again played with a respect that borders on fear. "How about a bit more commentary about the game," says Clinton Rowling. "Remember that thing people are logging on to the live feed to follow?? As much as I find your campness amusing and your amazement that people get up early slightly interesting I'm logged on to follow a quarter final game at the cricket World Cup...." Sure. Where do I send the editorial consultancy fee? And when do I come and tell you how to do your job?
  18th over: New Zealand 69-2 (Ryder 44, Taylor 14) Morkel hasn't been at his best today &#8211; too wide to Ryder in particular, and he clubs two more through the covers. Whatever you do, don't let him free those massive arms. Morkel gets a slower ball wrong later in the over and Ryder helps it around the corner for four to bring up a good fifty partnership. "In response to Guy Hornsby's comments in the 9th over, people who get up early every day are not preternaturally happy people," says Ewan Dunnett. "They are usually depressed and full of fear. So much so they can't sleep. Children's television presenters, much like many comedians, are full of inner demons." Children's TV presenters are a fascinating genre of human. Have you seen that lass on Dancing On Ice. I haven't, because I have never watched Dancing On Ice, ever, but my friends tell me she has a ceaseless jauntiness that borders on the disconcerting.
  19th over: New Zealand 75-2 (Ryder 47, Taylor 19) Botha replaces Tahir, and the hitherto strokeless Taylor plays a gorgeous extra-cover drive for four. That's his first boundary. This has been an extremely good partnership, not least because it would have been easy to wave the white one after that abysmal start. "If Steve Kerr wants to watch the Sharks/Crusaders game he should head to the Famous Three Kings just by West Ken tube," says John O'Mahony. "Probably the best sports-watching pub ever. They have about 50-odd screens and they all seem to be showing something different. Some of the tables even have their own TV. Not been there for a couple of years mind so might have gone downhill." Everything does. It says here.
  20th over: New Zealand 77-2 (Ryder 48, Taylor 20) Graeme Smith continues to shuffle his bowlers &#8211; he really is a kid in a sweet shop &#8211; with Kallis replacing Morkel. Taylor ducks under an existentialism-heavy bouncer, and there are just two from the over. "I don't even read the commentary here anymore, except maybe the bits in bold," says Niall Harden. "I'm here for the great life advice, withering sarcasm, Freudian misprints and unsettling videos. I don't even really understand rugby."
  21st over: New Zealand 80-2 (Ryder 49, Taylor 22) Three singles from Botha's over. South Africa could do with a wicket here. They might just, for the first time, be thinking dark thoughts. "I'm sensing," begins Jonathan Wood, "that Clinton isn't a morning person."
  22nd over: New Zealand 84-2 (Ryder 51, Taylor 24) Nobody really knows what a good score on is on what is a pretty slow pitch, but I reckon New Zealand would take 250. Taylor opens the face to glide Kallis to third man for a single. Then Ryder pushes a single to reach a really good half-century, defiant at first and controlled thereafter. He almost falls to the last delivery, however, gloving an attempted hook to third man for a single. "Dear Coronation Street, I like cookery programmes," says Scott Murray. "Please stop telling stories about people in Manchester and start doing recipes. Dear Brian Cox, I am frightened of the dark. Please stop talking about space."
  23rd over: New Zealand 87-2 (Ryder 53, Taylor 25) Botha has been pretty economical today. Just three singles from that over, so his figures are now 7-0-19-0. "Can anyone give me a good reason," begins Gary Naylor, "why SA deny themselves the services of the best fielder in the world in order to use him as a below average keeper?" Because fielding isn't quantified. Which is not to say you don't have a point.
  24th over: New Zealand 88-2 (Ryder 53, Taylor 25) One from Kallis's over. This is a good spell for South Africa, with the last five overs bringing only 12 runs. As Pat Symcox says on Sky, New Zealand's dot-ball ratio has been too high today. Yet, for all that, they are still in a perfectly acceptable position. "Just to clarify &#8211; having children doesn't mean you get up early; it just means your sleep is more fractured from 5-7am," says Kristian Petterson. "Oh, and that your significant other loathes you even more than ever as they deal with said offspring as you snore. Apparently."
  25th over: New Zealand 92-2 (Ryder 56, Taylor 26) This might be New Zealand's window of opportunity, with the offspinner JP Duminy coming into the attack. Ryder chips high over extra cover for a couple, and two singles complete the over. "I'm torn," says Jay Rose. "As an Australian, I desperately want to see the Kiwis win this one, but a hard-earned grudging respect for Graeme Smith makes me want to see him end his career with a WC trophy. Plus, I simply can't see NZ beating India, which is even more important."
  26th over: New Zealand 93-2 (Ryder 56, Taylor 27) This is a nice move from Smith. He could have let the game drift along for another five overs, but instead he has brought back Dale Steyn with a view to breaking this partnership. He doesn't do that, but it is a tight over that yields just one. New Zealand have scored only 18 off the last seven overs. Something will have to give pretty soon. "Obviously I would rather stay up until 3 am smoking and drinking with all you salt of the earth chaps," says Richard Hands, "but I have get up early because I live in Africa (where as often as not there's no electricity) and because my children have to be ready to leave for school at 6.30. Granola and carrot juice have nothing to do with it. In other news, the true delight of this WC for me has been the re-emergence and indeed pre-eminence of really good spin bowling. Just wish I could watch it."
  27th over: New Zealand 98-2 (Ryder 58, Taylor 29) Duminy's over is a better one for New Zealand, with five from it. "Answer to Naylor's question about South Africa's wicketkeeper," says Robin Hazlehurst. "Morne van Wyk's batting."
  28th over: New Zealand 104-2 (Ryder 64, Taylor 29) Ryder brings up the 100 with the first boundary for nine overs, a thumping off drive off Steyn. "How about more discussion of fish fingers and other important stuff," says Tony Tyler. "These days almost every entry seems to start with some rubbish about cricket. Anyone would think you're obsessed. (Please send the editorial consultancy fee to me.)"
  29th over: New Zealand 108-2 (Ryder 65, Taylor 32) Imran Tahir replaces JP Duminy and whistles through an over at a cost of four. "Beavering away on a preview as I am, I've only just caught up with your 11th over Norwegian reference," says Mike Selvey. "I'm currently reading a Henning Mankell 'Wallander' novel, which when set alongside The Killing and the Stieg Larsson trilogy means that I would no more report cricket in Scandinavia than I would Midsomer."
  30th over: New Zealand 116-2 (Ryder 71, Taylor 34) Another bowling change, the 11th of the innings, with Robin Peterson replacing Dale Steyn. Ryder greets him by charging down the wicket to the first ball and blasting it over mid off for a one-bounce four. The boundary from the first ball of an over helps relax the batsmen &#8211; like when you actually make people laugh during the first pint and can therefore sit and not worry about being you for the next 10 minutes or so &#8211; and they are happy to milk singles for the rest of the over, the last of which brings up a meticulous century partnership. "Dear Ron Jeremy," begins Dan Smith. "Enough of this grunting, when's that washing machine going to be fixed?"
  31st over: New Zealand 118-2 (Ryder 72, Taylor 35) Ryder slices Tahir over point. Just two from a good over. "There's not much interest in NZ /SA here in Dubai on a lovely weekend afternoon," says Bob Cochrane. "But I'm wondering what the town will be like come Wednesday, 1:00 pm local time, when India and Pakistan square off. My guess is that streets will be empty and a record number of workers will fall victim to a mysterious illness." The battle fever.
  32nd over: New Zealand 128-2 (Ryder 75, Taylor 42) Ross Taylor gets down one knee to slog sweep Peterson for a big six. "There we go boy!" says Mark Nicholas.
  This game is about to get interesting. Ten from the over. "This one," says Kristian Petterson, "goes out to all the people who've found themselves at the Guardian OBO by mistake..." That's hilarious. But clearly not true, because we love and respect all our readers equally here at the Guardian.
  WICKET! New Zealand 130-3 (Taylor c Kallis b Tahir 43) All that good work undone in an instant. Taylor slog sweeps straight to deep square leg, where Kallis takes a good catch. That was smart cricket from Tahir, who hurried Taylor by whipping through his over in no time. Taylor tried to delay him, but he was a little flustered and fell to the final delivery.
  33rd over: New Zealand 130-3 (Ryder 76, Styris 0) Apparently the auto-refresh again isn't working. Apologies for that. Still, hammering F5 is endearingly retro, right? Oh. "Isn't navel gazing the whole point of cricket?" says Myles Thomas. "Why else would anyone stand out in a field for a long period every weekend for a summer focussing on the off chance of a ball being hit close enough to catch?"
  34th over: New Zealand 135-3 (Ryder 80, Styris 1) Five from Peterson's over, and it's time for the mandatory ball change.
  35th over: New Zealand 139-3 (Ryder 82, Styris 3) Four singles from Botha's over. New Zealand have clearly put all their eggs in the basket marked 'overs 46-50'. It's a big risk, but an understandable one for such obvious underdogs. I still think their best tactic is to just stay in the game as long as possible. Even if South Africa are 185 for three in the 40th, chasing 250, New Zealand will be reasonably happy. "And to the fellow who loses sleep between five and seven because of a baby, try triplets, sunshine," says Mike Selvey. "You haven't even seen the shine off the new ball with one."
  36th over: New Zealand 147-3 (Ryder 82, Styris 11) Morkel returns to the attack, and his first is pushed supremely down the ground for four by Styris. That's a gorgeous stroke, and three balls later he drags a slower ball through midwicket for four more. Morkel has, by his very high standards, been poor today. "Agree with Lord Selvey, Norwegians won't get cricket," says Ben Dorning. "They like sport to be about man vs nature, not man against man. Otherwise they get all Scandinavian and cerebral about it &#8211; a friend was at a football match in Sweden recently when two groups of fans were singing different football chants at each other. He asked his Swedish friend what they were saying and apparently one group's chant was 'Push up more and stop sitting so deep' while the reply from the other group was 'Yes, but don't leave the centre backs exposed!'"
  37th over: New Zealand 153-3 (Ryder 83, Styris 16) Styris has started extremely well. He dances down the track to drive Botha's second ball emphatically over mid on for four and now has 16 from 14 balls. "This hitting this F5 has just got me into trouble," says Mark Taylor. "My manager, who can't see my screen but can see what I'm doing, has told to me that for the last ten minutes all she's seen me do is hit one key on my keyboard. Not sure I could explain that one?" Tell her it's 'X' and you're just a very very modern man.
  WICKET! New Zealand 153-4 (Styris b Morkel 16) I told you Styris looked good. That was one shot too many. He charged Morkel and tried a roundhouse slap over the off side, but the ball flew off the bottom edge and onto the stumps.
  38th over: New Zealand 154-4 (Ryder 83, Williamson 1) Just one from Morkel's over, and the wicket. "As a player for The Stockholm Academicals in the prestigious Swedish Premier (well, only) League, I'd like to formally invite Lord Selvey to report on one of our matches this summer," says Dan MacDonald. "I can personally vouch for his safety, although some of my shot selection will almost certainly be criminal."
  WICKET! New Zealand 156-5 (Ryder c sub (Ingram) b Tahir 83) New Zealand are starting to subside. Ryder top edges a sweep straight to deep square leg, and the substitute Colin Ingram takes an easy catch. Tahir charges around in celebration like a man who has cured baldness, banging his head back and forth in delight. There are few bowlers in world cricket who enjoy taking wickets as much as he does.
  39th over: New Zealand 157-5 (Williamson 3, N McCullum 0) Williamson cannot afford to hang around here. It's a big ask for a 20-year-old, but he needs to play himself in with singles, not dot balls. Just two runs from the over. "Apologies for attempting to use you like a local radio station," says Nick Williamson, "but if you were able to post a message about my JustGiving page I'd be very grateful indeed. I am a member of a team from Scottish Widows which is taking part in the Intelligent Sport UK Challenge in Exmoor from 16-19 June 2011. We are competing to raise funds on behalf of Children 1st (effectively the Scottish branch of the NSPCC), which is obviously a great cause. Even better is that Lloyds Banking Group (of which we are part) has pledged to match anything we manage to raise."
  40th over: New Zealand 164-5 (Williamson 10, N McCullum 0) Wiliamson edges Morkel just short of Smith at slip. He then works one nicely through midwicket for three in an over that brings seven. New Zealand are still just about in this game. "Mark Taylor can avoid his manager's glare by using the right mouse button to bring up a menu, and the left clicking refresh," says Paul Wakefield, who may or may not have thought this through.
  41st over: New Zealand 168-5 (Williamson 12, N McCullum 2) Four singles from Tahir's over. "Having met the erstwhile children's TV presenter Dave Benson Phillips, I can assure you that that lass on Dancing on Ice's jauntiness would pale into insignificance," says James Prout. "He is as jaunty and relentlessly happy at 6 in the morning off stage/camera as he is at 4 in the afternoon on stage/camera dropping parents into the gunk dunk. Yes the time I met him at that ungodly hour, I was hungover. My day was a long and tortuous one."
  42nd over: New Zealand 169-5 (Williamson 12, N McCullum 3) Nathan McCullum edges Steyn's second ball on the half volley to the keeper de Villiers. Only one run from an excellent over. "To be absolutely certain of an early start, make sure you acquire not only a small child, but at least one cat," says Richard O'Hagan. "If the child does not wake you at the crack of dawn, the cat almost certainly will. For guaranteed results, get more than one cat, that way you can be sure that if one of them isn't moaning about a lack of food or trying to show off a mouse, the other certainly will be. Or they'll be fighting with each other. I've even tried making mine watch Tom & Jerry and they still don't get it."
  43rd over: New Zealand 171-5 (Williamson 13, N McCullum 4) South Africa are squeezing this innings very impressively. Two from Peterson's over, which means the last six have brought only 18 runs and two wickets. "I had two root canals last Friday," chirps Michael Behl. "The pain wasn't too bad but on Wednesday night I was eating pasta sauce with bacon in it, I bit down on a piece of bacon and it hurt, like really, really hurt. I never thought bacon would ever cause me pain. Now I've been in pain since then and I have a final root canal booked for 3.45pm today. This pretty much ruins my Friday, the only thing I could hope for is South Africa losing, it would alleviate some of the inevitable pain." Root canals on consecutive Fridays? Dumb luck. That gives a whole new meaning to the Friday feeling.
  44th over: New Zealand 174-5 (Williamson 15, N McCullum 5) Still no sign of a Powerplay, or any power play. Three singles from Steyn's over. This is slipping away from New Zealand. "Robin Hazlehurst's advice in the 8th over," begins Steve Johnson. "Because it was very boring you won't recall that you posted my advice earlier this tournament regarding the positives of small children in overcoming the 'clean glasses' fixation. Are you starting to see a trend? Listen to the fans, Smyth. Listen to the fans. You know it makes sense&#8230; (I can't provide much advice on the 'finding the right woman' bit. Except these things take time, even if you're the most inept etc.)"
  45th over: New Zealand 187-5 (Williamson 23, N McCullum 6) New Zealand finally take the batting Powerplay, and Robin Peterson's ninth over disappears for 13. Williamson mows the second over ball over mid on for six, a fine shot, and then McCullum misses a huge swipe at a ball that races away for four byes. "SA choking again..." says Andre van der Walt. "Luckily they're choking NZ this time."
  WICKET! New Zealand 188-6 (N McCullum c Duminy b Steyn 6) This might be a blessing in disguise for New Zealand. Nathan McCullum's grim innings of 6 in 18 balls, in which the only thing he middled was fresh air, ends when he swipes a slower ball from Steyn up in the air and straight to point. Great work from Steyn, who is a master when it comes to death bowling. And new-ball bowling, and middle-overs bowling...
  46th over: New Zealand 189-6 (Williamson 24, Oram 0) Steyn has brilliant figures of 8-0-25-2. He is so good.
  47th over: New Zealand 196-6 (Williamson 26, Oram 6) Jacob Oram just need to score 40 not out off 15 balls. No pressure. He sweeps his second ball, from Tahir, behind square for four. "Can someone explain why Oram is batting below Nathan McCullum?" says Anand. "Wasn't Oram supposed to be one of the big hitters?" No and yes.
  48th over: New Zealand 203-6 (Williamson 32, Oram 7) No boundaries in that Steyn over, but New Zealand do manage to bust their lungs to the tune of seven runs. Williamson would have been miles out had Faf du Plessis hit the stumps from mid off.
  WICKET! New Zealand 204-7 (Oram b Morkel 7) Oram misses, Morkel hits, and New Zealand's hopes of 230 or more have now gone. That was an excellent first delivery back from Morkel, right on target and hitting the top of off stump when Oram missed a mighty hoick.
  WICKET! New Zealand 210-8 (Vettori b Morkel 6) Morne Morkel cleans Vettori up with a wonderful slower yorker. Seven balls remaining. There was an odd bit of commentary from Mark Nicholas, who screamed "EEEEEEEEE'S GOT 'IM!" but with the "EEEEE" sounding like something out of Bullseye.
  49th over: New Zealand 211-8 (Williamson 32, Woodcock 1) From the last 12 overs, New Zealand have scored 58 for the loss of five wickets. South Africa have been fantastic in the field.
  50th over: New Zealand 221-8 (Williamson 38, Woodcock 3) The last over of the innings from Steyn goes for 10, including a boundary over extra cover from Williamson and a wide off what should have been the last ball. Williamson's cameo of 38 from 41 balls has given New Zealand a chance, but South Africa were superb in the field and would probably reach their target of 222 nine times out of ten. Alan Gardner will type you through the first 10 overs of New Zealand reply in half an hour or so; you can email him on alan.gardner.casual@guardian.co.uk.
  INNINGS BREAK
  Afternoon, chooks. How are we? I was going to mock up a picture of Graeme Smith wearing a snood to display at the top of the page throughout the South Africa run chase but in the end I couldn't be bothered didn't have time. Anyway, to those asking about the absence of scorecard and popup &#8211; we only get them for England games. You didn't think this was a proper operation, did you?
  Here's Ant Pease: "Short of turning up like The Dude from The Big Lebowski (or El Duderino if you're not into that whole brevity thing) complete with jazz woodbine, how can your email officially pronounce you to be more casual than Bull?" Haven't you seen Bully's new byline photo? He's a married man, now. The Dude abides no longer ...
  1st over: South Africa 8-0 (target: 222, Amla 7, Smith 1) South Africa can't mess this one up, can they? Anyway, we're about to get going again. Nathan McCullum is going to bowl the first over &#8211; a somewhat leftfield choice, even by this tournament's standards. He's also starting around the wicket, to the right-handed Amla ... who leans into a couple of lazily effective cover drives, taking a two and a four from the first three balls. Hang on, what's this ...
  WICKET! Amla c Vettori b N McCullum 7 (1st over: South Africa 8-1, target: 222) That's a very unfortunate way to go, as Amla is caught at slip after his edge rebounded up off wicketkeeper Brendon McCullum's boot! It looked like a bump-ball on first sight but the McCullums and Vettori both knew what had happened. Amla cut a ball that kept low, the shot deflecting on to the toe of McCullum's boot and popping straight up to Vettori.
  2nd over: South Africa 10-1 (target: 222, Smith 3, Kallis 0) "I generally dont like to do a Warnie, but I predict NZ will win this match by about 15 runs with Daniel Vettori scaring the SA with his moustache to get five wickets," prognosticates Pratik Dubey. Vettori, sadly, has got rid of his 'stache, but he opens at the other end &#8211; spinners at both ends! Smith almost runs himself out but just manages to beat the direct hit from long-leg.
  3rd over: South Africa 15-1 (target: 222, Smith 6, Kallis 2) It's an over of shoes (ones and twos, for those wanting in their cockney) from McCullum. The good news for South Africa is that New Zealand were 6-1 for one after three overs of their innings. They're miles ahead! "The run chase total is ominous," warns Ian Copestake. "In South Africa 222 is the number of Diabilto, the very small devil." Has anyone ever had to chase 666? Obviously you'd have no chance of getting it ...
  4th over: South Africa 18-1 (target: 222, Smith 6, Kallis 5) Here's a good link from Mo Holkar, who points out that Amla's dismissal is reminiscent of this David Gower number. You do see them ... I'm sure there's a more recent example lurking in among the shadowy recesses of my brain. Vettori rattles through six balls of left-arm darts.
  5th over: South Africa 20-1 (target: 222, Smith 7, Kallis 6) Brendon McCullum thinks he's got Kallis, strangled down the legside off his brother's bowling ... but it looks like it just clipped his pads. The good thing about there being two spinners on so early is that I'll get to hand back to Smyth asap; the bad: I have no time to get up to speed!
  6th over: South Africa 27-1 (target: 222, Smith 8, Kallis 12) The bear thumps a drive down the ground for four ... and then gets hit on his back pad after stomping down the track. New Zealand decide not to review it and although it was probably hitting leg the decision wouldn't have been overturned. "Anand here," writes Anand, helpfully, "writing from the Netherlands. Have you ever seen something as garish as McCullum's gloves? Looks like one of those traffic policemen. IF he were a bowler wearing an arm band like that, I am sure the batsmen would object. If SRT, the man who can detect miniscule movement in and around the sightscreen were to bat, he would object to the gloves 😉." They're not as bad as Kevin O'Brien's hairdo.
  7th over: South Africa 33-1 (target: 222, Smith 9, Kallis 17) Tim Southee comes on to give these opening exchanges a more traditional flavour. He's joint-fourth on the tournament wicket-takers list but it doesn't look like the pitch will be offering him much assistance today. Kallis pings one off his legs for four. "Don't know about chasing 666," says Vincent Barreto, "but Victoria beat Tasmania by an innings and 666 runs in Melbourne about 1922 &#8230; and Tasmania has devils!!!" Irony, eh? If I only I knew what it meant.
  8th over: South Africa 36-1 (target: 222, Smith 11, Kallis 18) Vettori (4-0-15-0) continues to keep a lid on things. A delivery that drifted across Smith but didn't turn appreciably snicks a thick-ish outside edge, with the ball running down towards third man for a couple. A first half-century of the tournament from Smith would go a long way to averting South Africa's need for the Heimlich manoeuvre at any stage today.
  9th over: South Africa 44-1 (target: 222, Smith 13, Kallis 24) A top edged hook from Kallis alls short of the man running in from long leg. Southee then strays on to Kallis's pads and he swats the ball away like (stretched simile alert!) a bear dismissing bees as he goes about collecting his honey. "As a mnemonic, I find irony to be very much like rain on your wedding day. I'm sure other examples also exist." Intriguing, Ant Pease. Tell us more.
  10th over: South Africa 50-1 (target: 222, Smith 18, Kallis 25) [Edges towards exit] So, Oram's coming on to chop down some trees/take a few Saffer wickets, just as Rob prepares to retake his sweaty seat. If someone could Photoshop a picture of Oram as a lumberjack and then send it in, you'd make me very happy. Oram is pretty accurate from the get-go but his last ball is wide and slashed through point for four by Smith. Right, now send your static and feedback to rob.smyth@guardian.co.uk. I need some lunch.
  11th over: South Africa 54-1 (target: 222, Smith 20, Kallis 27) Hello boys! Southee forces Kallis to take evasive action with a good bouncer in an over that includes four singles. South Africa are cruising and are going to have to work extremely hard to cock this up.
  12th over: South Africa 58-1 (target: 222, Smith 22, Kallis 29) Oram galumphs in for some more. It's all a bit futile, and not in the Nathan Barley sense. Four singles from the over. "Is there anything more disconcerting than filling in a hotel mini-bar form whilst very hungover and seeing that the purchase options include mouthwash and shoe polish," weeps Stephen Cottreell. "For one horrible moment I thought I'd bottomed out. Like Christopher sitting on Ade's dog in the Sopranos."
  13th over: South Africa 60-1 (target: 222, Smith 23, Kallis 30) Two more singles from Southee's over. This is easy for South Africa. Somewhere in a dark corner of my brain, Big Daddy is beating his chest, Tarzan-style, while a baying crowd chant "EASY! EASY! EASY!" I do miss Big Daddy. Look at the state of this. "I'm going to the cinema tomorrow to see Submarine," says Louise Wright, mistaking this for Twitter. "My dad is going with me. It's suddenly occurred to me that with it being a coming-of-age film, it might be full of sex scenes and thus be v embarrassing to watch when accompanied by a parent. Anyone seen it and know whether I've made a dreadful choice of film in that respect, please? If so, suggestions for avoidance tactics would be welcome." One of my best friends went to see American Pie with his ma. Imagine.
  14th over: South Africa 68-1 (target: 222, Smith 28, Kallis 33) The left-arm spinner Luke Woodcock, playing only his third ODI, comes on to bowl. His first ball is a nervous wide half-volley that Smith blitzes through extra cover for four, but the fourth is a brute that spits past Kallis's outside edge. Where did that come from?
  WICKET! South Africa 69-2 (Smith c sub (How) b Oram 28) Graeme Smith's poor tournament continues with a very soft dismissal. He reached well wide of off stump at a nothing delivery from Jacob Oram and sliced it straight to backward point, where the substitute Jamie How took a smart catch moving to his left.
  15th over: South Africa 69-2 (target: 222, Kallis 34, de Villiers 0) This is the big partnership, between arguably South Africa's two best batsmen. If New Zealand can winkle out one more then South Africa will be three down. "I saw Submarine last night," says Jos Roberts, mistaking this for Twitter. "Nothing really to make your parents uncomfortable, other than Paddy Considine with an amazing mullet! Pretty funny though."
  16th over: South Africa 72-2 (target: 222, Kallis 36, de Villiers 1) Three singles from Woodcock's over, which includes a couple of excellent stops from Guptill in the covers. "When I came of age," says Ian Copestake, "there was no sex involved."
  17th over: South Africa 74-2 (target: 222, Kallis 38, de Villiers 1) Kallis flicks Oram to leg for a couple, the only runs from that over. It's a fairly quiet spell in the match.
  18th over: South Africa 81-2 (target: 222, Kallis 39, de Villiers 7) Woodcock is having a bad time of it. His first ball is a full toss that de Villiers clips for four, and there are three more singles. South Africa need 131 from 32 overs. It should be a doddle. Should.
  19th over: South Africa 81-2 (target: 222, Kallis 39, de Villiers 7) Oram bowls a good maiden to de Villiers, so his figures are now 5-1-13-1. "I've learnt two valuable lessons today," says Lizzy Ammon. "1) Never bet on Graeme Smith 2) don't expect a four-year-old to prefer watching NZ vs SA to watching Star Wars. There was a physical wrestle for the remote. I didn't win."
  20th over: South Africa 87-2 (target: 222, Kallis 41, de Villiers 11) Vettori brings himself on for Woodcock, which has to be the right move. Five from the over, including a very tight two to third man from de Villiers. "When I first moved to the UK I had trouble grasping your concept of 'irony'," says Marie Meyer. "Then I went to Torquay for a weekend because I had heard it described as 'the English Riviera'. I get it now."
  21th over: South Africa 93-2 (target: 222, Kallis 42, de Villiers 16) That is an exquisite stroke from AB de Villiers, a square drive for four from a perfectly good delivery by Oram. Things may change, but for the moment this feels like a totally routine run chase. "Lizzy Ammon's four-year-old sounds like a Big Daddy in the making," says Ian Copestake. "All he needs to complete his fate is to be called Shirley."
  22nd over: South Africa 97-2 (target: 222, Kallis 45, de Villiers 17) Kallis charges Vettori but is beaten in the flight, and his drive lands just in front of the man running back from mid on. The next ball is fluller and quicker and zips past the outside edge. Very smart bowling from Vettori.
  23rd over: South Africa 103-2 (target: 222, Kallis 46, de Villiers 22) Another wonderfully timed drive from de Villiers, this time through the covers for four off Southee. He has a disgusting amount of ability. Kallis then survives a token run-out referral after a direct hit from mid on. "My old English teacher took his wife to see American Pie in the mistaken belief it was American Beauty," says Andrew Fraser. "He told us that he wasn't sure it was quite the classic others claimed it as&#8230;" When I was about 12 my Dad asked me to recommend some films that he could order from his book club thing. I knew he liked cop films, but I got 48 Hours mixed up with 9 1/2 Weeks. I wish I was making that up.
  24th over: South Africa 108-2 (target: 222, Kallis 47, de Villiers 25) Kallis is slow to set off for a leg bye towards square leg and would probably have been run out by a direct hit from the wicketkeeper Brendon McCullum. Five from Vettori's over. "There's a scene in Being There where Shirley MacLaine takes Peter Sellers' oft-stated line of 'I like to watch' very literally," says Matt Emerson. "I watched that with my Mum and my Nan when I was about 14...my face could have been used on a Pantone reference chart as a replacement for crimson..."
  WICKET! South Africa 108-3 (Kallis c Oram b Southee 47) A fantastic running catch from Jacob Oram gives New Zealand a sniff. Kallis clubbed a mighty pull towards deep midwicket, where Oram appeared from nowhere to take a two-handed catch above his head on the run. That's a brilliant piece of fielding, especially for such a giant man.
  25th over: South Africa 110-3 (target: 222, de Villiers 26, Duminy 1) Another quick wicket would make this really interesting, because South Africa have a relatively fragile lower order. "I have a picture of Giant Haystacks in my wallet that I have had for twenty years," says David Weston. "It is torn from a pub quiz sheet. The quiz was in the Johnson Arms public house in Dunkirk, Nottingham. I'll let you see it if you want." I like the fact that you don't feel the need to explain this behaviour. After all, keeping a picture of a huge hirsute wrestler in a wallet is precisely what all right-thinking people would do.
  26th over: South Africa 113-3 (target: 222, de Villiers 28, Duminy 2) Nathan McCullum replaces Vettori, who bowled better than figures of 7-0-29-0 suggest. Three from a quiet over. "My American inlaws, septuagenarians both, decided to go and see the film Quills (which, for the uninitiated, is about the Marquis de Sade)," says Richard O'Hagan. "I think they are still recovering from the experience." They are not the only ones.
  27th over: South Africa 120-3 (target: 222, de Villiers 34, Duminy 3) Duminy drags an attempted pull onto his body off the bowling of Southee; then de Villiers played a stunning on drive for four, through the legs of Duminy at the non-striker's end. He looks in fantastic nick. "The 48 Hours/9 1/2 weeks confusion is understandable," says Dan Smith. "9 1/2 weeks is a completely unrealistic period for a passionate love affair. While 'Gone in 60 Seconds' turns out to be a film about car theft."
  WICKET! South Africa 121-4 (Duminy b N McCullum 3) Now then. Duminy misses an angled-bat slap at a flighted delivery from McCullum that goes straight on to hit the off stump. That's a hideous shot. Every time you think the game is going away from New Zealand they take a wicket. If they get one more they will arguably be on top.
  WICKET! South Africa 121-5 (de Villiers run out 35) It's happening. South Africa are doing it again. I don't believe this. New Zealand have got the huge wicket of AB de Villiers, who was called through for a seriously dodgy single to midwicket and was just short of his ground when Brendon McCullum claimed the throw from Guptill and shattered the stumps. It went to the third umpire but New Zealand knew it was out. Before leaving the crease, de Villiers almost kicked off with a couple of New Zealand fielders, presumably because of an overzealous send-off. This is a remarkable turnaround, and that is such a big wicket because de Villiers was in sublime touch.
  28th over: South Africa 121-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 0, Botha 0) They couldn't. Could they? In fact, what happened with de Villiers was this: a number of New Zealand fielders, including the substitute Kyle Mills, were right in du Plessis's grille, pointing out that he had run out the best player, so de Villiers came over to support du Plessis. A couple of them will get done by the match referee. If they win, they will not care one jot about that. "Statistics question," says Andre Van der Walt. "Has anyone ever followed OBO when they had the option to watch a match?" That's not a statistics question. That's a just-how-badly-has-humanity-gone-wrong question.
  29th over: South Africa 122-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 1, Botha 0) Aggressive captaincy from Daniel Vettori, who brings himself back into the attack. He almost skids a couple of quicker ones through du Plessis, and there's just one from the over. "Those collars are starting to look a bit tight on the South African jerseys," says Mark O'Neil.
  30th over: South Africa 123-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 2, Botha 0) South Africa's lower order has some handy players, most notably Botha and Peterson, but it's nowhere near the McMillian-Pollock-Klusener vintage. One from McCullum's over. This game is wide open now, and in fact New Zealand are probably marginal favourites. "I still cringe at the memory of seeing Se7en with my mum when I was just 18," says Andrew Banks. "She overheard me saying I wanted to see it on the phone and decided to treat me despite my protestations that she wouldn't like it. Not sure she's recovered, and sticks almost entirely to Miss Marple nowadays..."
  31st over: South Africa 125-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 3, Botha 1) Woodcock replaces Vettori and has a biggish shout for LBW against du Plessis. It was going down leg. Just two from the over, and the requirement is now 97 from 114 balls. "Unless South Africa can call up a last minute replacement and get their young off-spinner Heimlich in at 8, you'd have to say it looks like they're doing it again," says Ant Pease. Honk!
  32nd over: South Africa 127-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 4, Botha 2) The South African batsmen are just regrouping for now. They look shell-shocked. The last five overs have brought seven runs and two wickets. "I often OBO whilst watching a game, sometimes even the same game," says Richard O'Hagan. "However, I am ferociously loyal and would never try and OBO/MBM several different sports at once *coughNAYLORcoughcoughcough*"
  WICKET! South Africa 128-6 (Botha b Oram 2) This is an astonishing collapse. Botha is bowled by a beautiful leg cutter from Oram that hits the top of off stump. That is a jaffa. South Africa have lost three wickets for eight in six overs, and if they lose this match they are never &#8211; ever &#8211; going to hear the end of it.
  33rd over: South Africa 128-6 (target: 222, du Plessis 5, Peterson 0) Even before that wicket, one of the South African backroom staff had his head in his hands. Then he started shaking his head sadly. He's completely given up! That's hilarious. He might as well be listening to this. "I saw Four Weddings and a Funeral with my parents when I was 15," says Paul Wakefield. "The loud sex scene left me utterly mortified, whilst my parents thought it hilarious." The scene, your mortification, or both?
  34th over: South Africa 129-6 (target: 222, du Plessis 6, Peterson 0) Is it still deja vu if it happens again and again? Nathan McCullum is in his element, racing through his overs in little more than a couple of minutes. Only one run from that, which makes it nine from the last seven.
  WICKET! South Africa 132-7 (Peterson c B McCullum b Oram 0) South Africa have completely gone. Peterson wafts hideously outside off stump and gets a thin inside edge to the keeper. South Africa have lost four wickets for 11 runs in eight never-to-be-forgotten overs.
  35th over: South Africa 141-7 (target: 222, du Plessis 13, Steyn 5) Steyn touches his first ball to the fine leg boundary and then du Plessis, who has to play his shots, slams a superb boundary through extra cover. South Africa will not believe this is happening to them again. It was supposed to be different this time. They had proved they were a different team by winning Test series in Australia, England and Pakistan. They had the variety in their attack, the experience in their top order. They won the group and got the easiest quarter-final draw. They started the quarter-final brilliantly, calmly controlling it for 75 overs. And then it happened. Like it always bloody happens.
  36th over: South Africa 142-7 (target: 222, du Plessis 13, Steyn 6) Steyn is a very tough man, an Australian in nature, and he is well capable of hanging around for 10 overs if du Plessis can do the bulk of the scoring. Steyn works the last ball of McCullum's over for a single, the only run from that over. "I'm contemplating making strangled and spluttering sounds at my South African mate after he took such pleasure in England losing to Ireland," says Mike McCarthy. "Contemplating it, because (a) we'll lose by 200 runs tomorrow and (b) he's a lot harder than me."
  37th over: South Africa 146-7 (target: 222, du Plessis 15, Steyn 7) Luke Woodcock comes back into the attack. His six remaining overs are so important, because he has been NZ's weakest bowler today, and he starts with a wide. Four from the over. New Zealand might have to think about using a sixth bowler, maybe Scott Styris or Jesse Ryder. "When I went travelling at 18, I stopped off at my great uncle and aunt in Canada," says Andrew Fraser. "Me and my friend convinced my great uncle to join his local video rental store and took out loads of films to while away the Canadian evenings. This seemingly foolproof plan collapsed as badly as the Saffers are when my great aunt joined us for American History... I still sweat when I think back to her reaction to the vigorous sex scene that starts the film. And not in a good way."
  WICKET! South Africa 146-8 (Steyn c Oram b N McCullum 8) What hell kinda shot is that? Steyn was inadvertently monopolising the strike, and the pressure &#8211; dot, dot, dot &#8211; got to him when he had a gruesome heave that flew off the edge. Oram, who couldn't stay out of this game if he tried, took a gleeful catch diving forward at backward point.
  38th over: South Africa 146-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 15, Morkel 0) Nathan McCullum finished with sensational figures of 10-1-24-3. South Africa were 120 for three after 27 overs, you know. I told you New Zealand just needed to stay in the game! And, while people will focus on South Africa, New Zealand have been wonderful. The moment they smelt weakness, they were all over South Africa like a cheap rash. "It's déjà vu all over again'," quotes Daniel Harris. "Berra explained that this quote originated when he witnessed Mickey Mantle and Roger Maris repeatedly hit back-to-back home runs in the Yankees' seasons in the early 1960s."
  39th over: South Africa 150-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 17, Morkel 1) South Africa have taken the batting Powerplay, a desperate move that presumably means du Plessis is going to go for it. Vettori counters by bringing himself back into the attack. du Plessis square drives for a couple and then drives a single down the ground. Here's a simple email from Rahul Nayyar, which will some up how plenty of folk are feeling: "Can't stop laughing." Then, just in case I miss that email, he follows up with "ROFL". You have to feel for South Africa, though. Of all their chokes, this is probably the worst.
  40th over: South Africa 156-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 22, Morkel 2) du Plessis smears an attempted yorker from Southee down the ground for four. This isn't quite over, not while he is there and not while New Zealand still have five fifth-bowler overs to bowl. South Africa need 66 from 10 overs with two wickets remaining.. As Mark Corrigan says at the start of season four of Peep Show, how the eff has it come to this? "When New Zealand were scoring slowly and losing wickets, you were full of praise for South Africa's skill and pressure," says Andy Fyfe. "Now it's all about how South Africa are throwing it away. Maybe some respect for NZ is in order? They've stuck with a plan (flawed as it may have been during their innings), backed themselves &#8211; a trait commentators are only too happy to recognise in Australia and England &#8211; and now the pressure they've applied is paying off. There are two teams playing this game..." Yep, it's a fair cop. Inevitably we focus on South Africa when something like this happens, but New Zealand have been great in the field &#8211; particularly Vettori as captain.
  41st over: South Africa 161-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 27, Morkel 2) du Plessis turned down a run off the last ball of the previous over, so that he could keep the strike, and he whips Vettori's third ball superbly past mid on for four. Five from the over, and Gary Naylor has just reminded me of this email, sent much earlier in this innings: "Re: 11th over: 'South Africa are cruising and are going to have to work extremely hard to cock this up'. You really are such an old hand at the OBO game aren't you? Like Glenn McGrath setting up a batsman with five short of a length before the toe-crusher."
  42nd over: South Africa 164-8 (need 58 from 48 balls; du Plessis 29, Morkel 3) Just three singles from Southee's over. That means that du Plessis keeps the strike, but the required rate has risen above seven an over. Meanwhile, Stephen Cottrell has a pop quiz for us, but you don't need to be a hotshot to get the right answer: "Which C was a 1990 album by the Beautiful South, following their 1989 debut, 'Welcome to the Beautiful South'?"
  WICKET! South Africa 172-9 (du Plessis c Southee b Oram 36) It's all over. du Plessis, dropped earlier in the over, rifles Oram low to cover, where Southee takes a good low catch on the edge of the circle. In the commentary box, Mark Nicholas actually starts singing "Oraaaaaaaaam!" Seriously, he started singing. Singing. But you can understand why, because Jacob Oram has had an incredible hour and a half in the field and with the ball.
  43rd over: South Africa 172-9 (need 50 from 42 balls; Morkel 4, Tahir 0) The No11, Imran Tahir, is about as good a batsman as me or you, so don't expect any miracles. This is a mind-blowing collapse. "Deja vu is illusory, which is presumably what SA are experiencing as they'll think it's all a bad dream," says John Starbuck. "What we have here is serial vu."
  WICKET! South Africa 172 all out (Morkel c sub b Woodcock 4). NEW ZEALAND WIN BY 49 RUNS Morne Morkel clouts Luke Woodcock to Jamie How at long off to spark delirious celebrations in Mirpur. New Zealand cannot believe they have won this game. Nobody can. It's one of the most amazing twists in World Cup history. South Africa were 108 for two and then 121 for three, but they fell apart in a fashion that was astonishing even by their standards. New Zealand were outplayed for 75 overs, yet they stayed in the game and then mauled South Africa when the pressure was on.
  It's a stunning performance from a team who always overachieve at World Cups, and who will now play in their sixth World Cup semi-final out of ten &#8211; even though this is the first knockout game they have ever won. But, really, today is all about South Africa. Graeme Smith walks onto the field wearing a million-yard stare. You would not believe the puss on him. After four years of almost ceaseless excellence from South Africa in all forms of the game, it is going to take them a long, long time to understand how and why this happened. They probably never will.
  Thanks for your emails. See you tomorrow for the other quarter-final; I forget who's playing.
  
  

Quarter-final, Mirpur

New Zealand v South Africa - as it happened

The Kiwis moved into the last four after an astonishing choke from the South Africans in Mirpur

• Rob Smyth and Alan Gardner
• guardian.co.uk, Friday 25 March 2011 08.00 GMT <li class="history">Article history The immutable law of World Cups – New Zealand will overachieve. Photograph: Saurabh Das/AP Preamble Morning. Who says 50-over cricket has nothing new to offer? This fascinating competition will enter virgin territory today, when either South Africa and New Zealand will win a World Cup knockout game for the first time. The fact they have not done so before is pretty staggering, even if it is not quite the statgasm we might think. This is only the second World Cup to have quarter-finals, so there haven't been that many knockout games down the years: this is the 34th in total, of which six have been lost by New Zealand and four by South Africa.
  
  Since South Africa's readmission to international cricket, the two sides have strikingly similar records. They were semi-finalists in 1992, 1999 and 2007; they were quarter-finalists in 1996; and they failed to reach the knockout stages in 2003. Yet a more relevant comparison might be between South Africa and another New Zealand team: the rugby boys, who have also found umpteen weird and wonderful ways not to win a World Cup.
  If South Africa discover another today, in a match they should win, a popular C-word may well be trending on a social networking site near you. (Insert your own 'and chokers will be trending too' joke here.)
  The winners of this match will play either Sri Lanka or England in Colombo on Tuesday. This will be played before the India v Pakistan semi-final. Scandalous, clearly, but all part of the plan from cricket's governing body, the BCCI, to ensure that India win.
  An early email, from Guy Collier "So this isn't exactly to do with the cricket but stick with me and I will do my best to bring it around. I am currently running a social experiment to see what happens when we open up questions of identity and move away from the traditional tick box approach you see in the census form – and if one small boy, albeit one who is actually 6ft tall and 30, can run a census from his bedroom using just social media. And the power of OBO cricket.
  "I am looking for any and all plugs to encourage people to state on Twitter #altcensus today I am.... I will gather all the statements to see how they compare to the national census. If anyone has any questions they can check www.alternativecensus.org.uk. So here is my tenuous cricket link: what box do half the England cricket team tick when asked about national identity...? Maybe if they took part in the Alternative Census we could find out!"
  The power of OBO cricket. Arf!
  South Africa at the World Cup
  Group stages: P42 W30 L11 T1 (Win percentage: 71)
  Knockout games: P4 W0 L3 T1 (Win percentage: 0)
  New Zealand at the World Cup
  Group stages: P61 W39 L22 (Win percentage: 64)
  Knockout games: P6 W0 L6 (Win percentage: 0)
  New Zealand have won the toss and will bat first. I think they had to do that to have a realistic chance of victory. That sets this game up beautifully. If they put 250 on the board, chase won't be the only CH-word we'll be mentioning as South Africa's batsmen go about their business.
  Both sides have picked three frontline spinners. Daniel Vettori returns to the side, even though he is not fully fit, and the left-armer Luke Woodcock also comes in, with James Franklin omitted. South Africa have Johan Botha, Imran Tahir and Robin Peterson, while the big three – Dale Steyn, Morne Morkel and AB de Villiers – return after sitting out the final group games against Bangladesh. Morne van Wyk misses out as a result.
  New Zealand Guptill, B McCullum (wk), Ryder, Taylor, Styris, Williamson, Vettori, N McCullum, Oram, Southee, Woodcock.
  South Africa Smith (c), Amla, Kallis, de Villiers (wk), Duminy, du Plessis, Botha, Peterson, Steyn, Morkel, Tahir.
  As these two are serial losers in the World Cup knockout stages, here is some encouragement for them from one of the most inspiring figures ever to bestride this earth. Ignore the bit at the top right of the video.
  Morning people Who are these weird "morning people" I keep seeing? They're a menace to society with their walking, talking and general 6am sentience. My alarm has been going off before 5.30 and 6 throughout this World Cup, and I've not felt so consistently violated since I inexplicably watched most of the first season of Gossip Girl in one hit. Why would anyone get up at such an hour, never mind seem so jaunty and busy? Yes we all admire your lust for life and the incontrovertibly superior energy content of your diet, but please don't rub in our face, at least not before midday.
  Thankfully the Guardian power-showers are one of the best things that have ever happened to anyone, ever, so I now feel vaguely human. But I still don't understand these strange "morning people". They're worse than the paediatricians. There's even a guide how to be a morning person. No thanks!
  1st over: New Zealand 2-0 (Guptill 1, B McCullum 1) South Africa open with a spinner, as usual. How odd it is to type that sentence. Today it's Robin Peterson rather than Johan Botha and his first over, played cagily, brings just a couple of singles. "Can today's match officially be termed a west London derby?" says Elliot Carr-Barnsley. "Also, cracking article by Selvey on Yardy's depression." It was. Selve is in storming form at the moment.
  2nd over: New Zealand 5-0 (Guptill 1, B McCullum 4) Dale Steyn's first ball is driven urgently through extra cover for three by Brendon McCullum. Those are the only runs from the over, although one delivery to Guptill bounces twice before reaching the keeper, a reflection of the pace of this pitch. New Zealand have beaten South Africa at the last two World Cups, famously so in 2003 when Stephen Fleming played an awesome innings; they are not the same side these days, but don't write them off, at least not until they collapse to 40 for seven. They certainly have a puncher's chance now that they are batting first. "Hold your horses Smyth, my boy," says Andrew Jobson. "In the (admittedly unlikely) event of the match being abandoned, the higher-ranked team (SA) progresses. So New Zealand would be knocked out, and SA could then get beaten in the semi by the winner of SL-Eng, preserving both teams' winless records."
  WICKET! New Zealand 5-1 (B McCullum ct and b Peterson 4) A sensational return catch from Robin Peterson gets rid of the dangerman Brendon McCullum. He danced down the track but was done by a bit of extra bounce and pushed the ball back to the left of Peterson, who dived and then extended a telescopic arm to take a wonderful catch. He took an unbelievable catch off his own bowling earlier in the tournament to dismiss Ian Bell, and this was comparable. Brilliant stuff.
  3rd over: New Zealand 6-1 (Guptill 1, Ryder 1) Robin Peterson is having quite a tournament. "This is it, isn't it?" says Duncan Bonnett. "I've spent the whole of last night and this morning not laughing at the Aussies in case it comes back to bite my boys as karmic revenge. We need to get into the Kiwi middle order quickly, or I'm afraid the ahem, nerves, will start to jangle out there. On paper, we're too strong for the Kiwis, but what if they pick scissors instead of rock?" Could make a 'Dale Stone' joke. Doesn't really work. Dale Stone!
  4th over: New Zealand 14-1 (Guptill 1, Ryder 8) An unusually sloppy over from Steyn includes a low full toss and a leg-side wide to Ryder, who then inside edges a hot inswinger to fine leg for four. These are very dangerous times for New Zealand, who could fold if they lose another one here. Ryder ends the over by clunking a pull over mid on for three. "Please can we have early mention for what I expect to be the star of today's game?" says Neil Withers. "I am of course referring to Daniel Vettori's amazing moustache – I saw it last night on TV and couldn't stop laughing! It's the finest display of slug-balancing since Baldrick."
  5th over: New Zealand 15-1 (Guptill 1, Ryder 9) The offspinner Johan Botha replaces Robin Peterson. As Mark Nicholas says on Sky, Graeme Smith is loving captaining a side with so many options. It's like going from the basic five channels to the full Sky+ experience, or so I'd imagine if I had Sky. Botha so nearly zips a quicker one through Ryder, who gets a very late inside edge. One from a very good over. South Africa have been seriously impressive thus far. "Morning people have just taken the next logical step from pretending they didn't want to come to the party you didn't invite them to," says Dan Smith. "They couldn't come to that party, or indeed any other event you wouldn't want them at, because they need to be up bright and early for a granola-fuelled jog to the office. I spit in their carrot juice."
  WICKET! New Zealand 16-2 (Guptill c Botha b Steyn 1) This is too easy for South Africa. Steyn dupes Guptill with a lovely slower ball, and he drives it high in the air to mid off, where Botha takes a nonchalant running catch.
  6th over: New Zealand 16-2 (Ryder 10, Taylor 0) In their last World Cup knockout game, the 2007 semi-final, South Africa lost the match inside 10 overs. They might have won this one by the 10th over. They have been outstanding. "You can rail against morning people all you want," says Peter Hanes, "but never forget that they're the ones that ensure that the supermarket is stocked with fish fingers by the time you get there."
  7th over: New Zealand 17-2 (Ryder 10, Taylor 1) One from another crafty Botha over. New Zealand are in all sorts of bother, already. "Yesterday's link to the freak yoga instructor and his rooster was bad enough, but linking to Nick Berry singing that execrable dirge is going too far," says Martin Sinclair. "I'd rather complete my census than sit through that twaddle!"
  8th over: New Zealand 24-2 (Ryder 16, Taylor 2) Morkel replaces Steyn, and Ryder flays a full delivery square on the off side for four. Good shot. "If you want to become a morning person it is simple - have a small child (yes yes I know, OBO readers, but even Millings has managed)," says Robin Hazlehurst. "You will get up at ungodly hours for several years and eventually get used to it. Option two, be a small child, they are certainly morning people. You were probably one too once, you just don't remember."
  9th over: New Zealand 27-2 (Ryder 17, Taylor 3) Crikey, Danny Morrison has entered the commentary box and is now using that soft, ticklish voice of his. I bet he whispers the sweetest nothings. Botha bowls a leg-side wide and then Ryder pushes a single to mid off. NZ bat a long way down – Oram is down to come in at No9 – so there's no need to panic just yet. But they need to find a bowler to target, and I'm not sure there are any. "I don't really get why anyone would want to get up early every day," says Guy Hornsby. "It's a necessity in order to pay the bills, to top up the supply of Liver Compromiser. The sort of people that do it are the preternaturally happy people – like children's TV presenters – that talk in awful lingo: work/life balance, working 'clever', maximising your potential, living life to the full. I just got a bit of sick in my mouth from that. There are so few jobs that would make you want to do that. Astronaut? Actor? International playboy? OBO writer? I bet Hugh Hefner doesn't get up in the morning. And yes, I'm hungover." I just typed 'children's TV presenter' into google, and look what was the second result.
  10th over: New Zealand 34-2 (Ryder 24, Taylor 3) Ryder spanks another square drive for four off Morkel, despite or perhaps because of the presence of Kallis at short point. It went through his legs in fact. Ryder then pulls through square leg for three. He's a dangerous customer, and he looks in the mood to give it some humpty. "I'm a Kiwi watching in Wellington," says Cat Doran. "Expecting an early night once we implode." Now that's what I call confidence.
  11th over: New Zealand 36-2 (Ryder 25, Taylor 4) "Any tips on getting my colleagues in Norway to embrace the majestic game that is cricket (even if it is the pyjama format)?" says Al Weeks. "I can't see why it's not a big hit here already, the climate is perfect for it and with the recent performance of minor nations they've probably got a chance of putting an ad hoc team together and giving England a close game." Show them lots of videos of Viv. He was even cooler than your average Scandinavian, so they'll surely recognise the swagger.
  12th over: New Zealand 47-2 (Ryder 33, Taylor 5) Peterson is back for Morkel, who took a little bit of abuse from Ryder. As does Peterson when a widish delivery is clattered through the covers for four. He gets four more to the same area off the last ball of the over, this time with a cut stroke. Ryder looks dangerous. "What a great start by the South Africans," says George Miller. "Peterson has really been a revelation for us in the WC. Although we are supposed to working on three papers (tomorrow, Sunday and Monday), production has pretty much ground to a halt."
  13th over: New Zealand 50-2 (Ryder 34, Taylor 7) Imran Tahir is going to bowl. He has stunning record in this tournament – 12 wickets at an average of 9.83 – and his second ball is a delicious googly that beats Ryder all ends up. Three from the over. "Rob old chap, am I the only one picking up a bit of, umm, Kenneth Williams campness in your commentary this morning?" says Steve Hudson. "Lovely man paunch? Danny M's whispered sweet nothings? If you're building up to a frank admission of some sort, just let me tell you that the OBO crew will be very supportive. After all, there's no room for intolerance in the world of online bilge these days. We'll tolerate anything. Clearly."
  14th over: New Zealand 53-2 (Ryder 35, Taylor 9) Three singles from Peterson's over. "Oh come on all you townies, out here in the wilds of Oxonshire there is the dawn chorus (coming in strong at about 0500 currently but set to move earlier)," says Angus Doulton. "Exactly what is needed to fortify one for a morning's OBO humour. Actually even in the midst of town, you'd be surprised what a few blackbirds can do to support the critical first mug of tea." I wish I was in bed. Normally, if you wake up early by accident, you can spend an hour moseying around, then get an extra nap in and still be up for midday when the day formally begins.
  15th over: New Zealand 57-2 (Ryder 36, Taylor 12) There's more chance of Lord Henry Manners of Mannersville zestily picking his nose at the dinner table than there is of Ryder picking Tahir. He hasn't got a clue, but he's getting away with it for now. Taylor isn't entirely comfortable either and he gets a leading edge that falls safely on the off side.
  "In the 6th over, when it was 16-2, you said that South Africa could have this game won by the 10th over," says Luke Dealtry. "It's now the 13th over and the Kiwis are 50-2. CHOKERS!" You said the word. You're not supposed to do that. If you say the C-word five times in a mirror, terrible things will happen.
  16th over: New Zealand 58-2 (Ryder 37, Taylor 12) The returning Morkel's first ball is belaboured towards backward point by Ryder, and Duminy saves four with a brilliant diving save. Just one from the over, but this has been a decent comeback from New Zealand. Their tactic should be to just stay in the game as long as possible and hope that the asphyxiating pressure does for South Africa later on. It goes against all logic, but I think New Zealand have got a real chance today. "A question for OBO readers," says Steve Kerr. "Does anyone know of a London pub showing the Crusaders/Sharks Super XV game live on Sunday? Obviously can't be arsed going to Twickenham and will donate independently here."
  17th over: New Zealand 61-2 (Ryder 39, Taylor 13) New Zealand must find a way to impose themselves on Tahir, which is easier typed from thousands of miles away than done. Just three from the over, which is again played with a respect that borders on fear. "How about a bit more commentary about the game," says Clinton Rowling. "Remember that thing people are logging on to the live feed to follow?? As much as I find your campness amusing and your amazement that people get up early slightly interesting I'm logged on to follow a quarter final game at the cricket World Cup...." Sure. Where do I send the editorial consultancy fee? And when do I come and tell you how to do your job?
  18th over: New Zealand 69-2 (Ryder 44, Taylor 14) Morkel hasn't been at his best today – too wide to Ryder in particular, and he clubs two more through the covers. Whatever you do, don't let him free those massive arms. Morkel gets a slower ball wrong later in the over and Ryder helps it around the corner for four to bring up a good fifty partnership. "In response to Guy Hornsby's comments in the 9th over, people who get up early every day are not preternaturally happy people," says Ewan Dunnett. "They are usually depressed and full of fear. So much so they can't sleep. Children's television presenters, much like many comedians, are full of inner demons." Children's TV presenters are a fascinating genre of human. Have you seen that lass on Dancing On Ice. I haven't, because I have never watched Dancing On Ice, ever, but my friends tell me she has a ceaseless jauntiness that borders on the disconcerting.
  19th over: New Zealand 75-2 (Ryder 47, Taylor 19) Botha replaces Tahir, and the hitherto strokeless Taylor plays a gorgeous extra-cover drive for four. That's his first boundary. This has been an extremely good partnership, not least because it would have been easy to wave the white one after that abysmal start. "If Steve Kerr wants to watch the Sharks/Crusaders game he should head to the Famous Three Kings just by West Ken tube," says John O'Mahony. "Probably the best sports-watching pub ever. They have about 50-odd screens and they all seem to be showing something different. Some of the tables even have their own TV. Not been there for a couple of years mind so might have gone downhill." Everything does. It says here.
  20th over: New Zealand 77-2 (Ryder 48, Taylor 20) Graeme Smith continues to shuffle his bowlers – he really is a kid in a sweet shop – with Kallis replacing Morkel. Taylor ducks under an existentialism-heavy bouncer, and there are just two from the over. "I don't even read the commentary here anymore, except maybe the bits in bold," says Niall Harden. "I'm here for the great life advice, withering sarcasm, Freudian misprints and unsettling videos. I don't even really understand rugby."
  21st over: New Zealand 80-2 (Ryder 49, Taylor 22) Three singles from Botha's over. South Africa could do with a wicket here. They might just, for the first time, be thinking dark thoughts. "I'm sensing," begins Jonathan Wood, "that Clinton isn't a morning person."
  22nd over: New Zealand 84-2 (Ryder 51, Taylor 24) Nobody really knows what a good score on is on what is a pretty slow pitch, but I reckon New Zealand would take 250. Taylor opens the face to glide Kallis to third man for a single. Then Ryder pushes a single to reach a really good half-century, defiant at first and controlled thereafter. He almost falls to the last delivery, however, gloving an attempted hook to third man for a single. "Dear Coronation Street, I like cookery programmes," says Scott Murray. "Please stop telling stories about people in Manchester and start doing recipes. Dear Brian Cox, I am frightened of the dark. Please stop talking about space."
  23rd over: New Zealand 87-2 (Ryder 53, Taylor 25) Botha has been pretty economical today. Just three singles from that over, so his figures are now 7-0-19-0. "Can anyone give me a good reason," begins Gary Naylor, "why SA deny themselves the services of the best fielder in the world in order to use him as a below average keeper?" Because fielding isn't quantified. Which is not to say you don't have a point.
  24th over: New Zealand 88-2 (Ryder 53, Taylor 25) One from Kallis's over. This is a good spell for South Africa, with the last five overs bringing only 12 runs. As Pat Symcox says on Sky, New Zealand's dot-ball ratio has been too high today. Yet, for all that, they are still in a perfectly acceptable position. "Just to clarify – having children doesn't mean you get up early; it just means your sleep is more fractured from 5-7am," says Kristian Petterson. "Oh, and that your significant other loathes you even more than ever as they deal with said offspring as you snore. Apparently."
  25th over: New Zealand 92-2 (Ryder 56, Taylor 26) This might be New Zealand's window of opportunity, with the offspinner JP Duminy coming into the attack. Ryder chips high over extra cover for a couple, and two singles complete the over. "I'm torn," says Jay Rose. "As an Australian, I desperately want to see the Kiwis win this one, but a hard-earned grudging respect for Graeme Smith makes me want to see him end his career with a WC trophy. Plus, I simply can't see NZ beating India, which is even more important."
  26th over: New Zealand 93-2 (Ryder 56, Taylor 27) This is a nice move from Smith. He could have let the game drift along for another five overs, but instead he has brought back Dale Steyn with a view to breaking this partnership. He doesn't do that, but it is a tight over that yields just one. New Zealand have scored only 18 off the last seven overs. Something will have to give pretty soon. "Obviously I would rather stay up until 3 am smoking and drinking with all you salt of the earth chaps," says Richard Hands, "but I have get up early because I live in Africa (where as often as not there's no electricity) and because my children have to be ready to leave for school at 6.30. Granola and carrot juice have nothing to do with it. In other news, the true delight of this WC for me has been the re-emergence and indeed pre-eminence of really good spin bowling. Just wish I could watch it."
  27th over: New Zealand 98-2 (Ryder 58, Taylor 29) Duminy's over is a better one for New Zealand, with five from it. "Answer to Naylor's question about South Africa's wicketkeeper," says Robin Hazlehurst. "Morne van Wyk's batting."
  28th over: New Zealand 104-2 (Ryder 64, Taylor 29) Ryder brings up the 100 with the first boundary for nine overs, a thumping off drive off Steyn. "How about more discussion of fish fingers and other important stuff," says Tony Tyler. "These days almost every entry seems to start with some rubbish about cricket. Anyone would think you're obsessed. (Please send the editorial consultancy fee to me.)"
  29th over: New Zealand 108-2 (Ryder 65, Taylor 32) Imran Tahir replaces JP Duminy and whistles through an over at a cost of four. "Beavering away on a preview as I am, I've only just caught up with your 11th over Norwegian reference," says Mike Selvey. "I'm currently reading a Henning Mankell 'Wallander' novel, which when set alongside The Killing and the Stieg Larsson trilogy means that I would no more report cricket in Scandinavia than I would Midsomer."
  30th over: New Zealand 116-2 (Ryder 71, Taylor 34) Another bowling change, the 11th of the innings, with Robin Peterson replacing Dale Steyn. Ryder greets him by charging down the wicket to the first ball and blasting it over mid off for a one-bounce four. The boundary from the first ball of an over helps relax the batsmen – like when you actually make people laugh during the first pint and can therefore sit and not worry about being you for the next 10 minutes or so – and they are happy to milk singles for the rest of the over, the last of which brings up a meticulous century partnership. "Dear Ron Jeremy," begins Dan Smith. "Enough of this grunting, when's that washing machine going to be fixed?"
  31st over: New Zealand 118-2 (Ryder 72, Taylor 35) Ryder slices Tahir over point. Just two from a good over. "There's not much interest in NZ /SA here in Dubai on a lovely weekend afternoon," says Bob Cochrane. "But I'm wondering what the town will be like come Wednesday, 1:00 pm local time, when India and Pakistan square off. My guess is that streets will be empty and a record number of workers will fall victim to a mysterious illness." The battle fever.
  32nd over: New Zealand 128-2 (Ryder 75, Taylor 42) Ross Taylor gets down one knee to slog sweep Peterson for a big six. "There we go boy!" says Mark Nicholas.
  This game is about to get interesting. Ten from the over. "This one," says Kristian Petterson, "goes out to all the people who've found themselves at the Guardian OBO by mistake..." That's hilarious. But clearly not true, because we love and respect all our readers equally here at the Guardian.
  WICKET! New Zealand 130-3 (Taylor c Kallis b Tahir 43) All that good work undone in an instant. Taylor slog sweeps straight to deep square leg, where Kallis takes a good catch. That was smart cricket from Tahir, who hurried Taylor by whipping through his over in no time. Taylor tried to delay him, but he was a little flustered and fell to the final delivery.
  33rd over: New Zealand 130-3 (Ryder 76, Styris 0) Apparently the auto-refresh again isn't working. Apologies for that. Still, hammering F5 is endearingly retro, right? Oh. "Isn't navel gazing the whole point of cricket?" says Myles Thomas. "Why else would anyone stand out in a field for a long period every weekend for a summer focussing on the off chance of a ball being hit close enough to catch?"
  34th over: New Zealand 135-3 (Ryder 80, Styris 1) Five from Peterson's over, and it's time for the mandatory ball change.
  35th over: New Zealand 139-3 (Ryder 82, Styris 3) Four singles from Botha's over. New Zealand have clearly put all their eggs in the basket marked 'overs 46-50'. It's a big risk, but an understandable one for such obvious underdogs. I still think their best tactic is to just stay in the game as long as possible. Even if South Africa are 185 for three in the 40th, chasing 250, New Zealand will be reasonably happy. "And to the fellow who loses sleep between five and seven because of a baby, try triplets, sunshine," says Mike Selvey. "You haven't even seen the shine off the new ball with one."
  36th over: New Zealand 147-3 (Ryder 82, Styris 11) Morkel returns to the attack, and his first is pushed supremely down the ground for four by Styris. That's a gorgeous stroke, and three balls later he drags a slower ball through midwicket for four more. Morkel has, by his very high standards, been poor today. "Agree with Lord Selvey, Norwegians won't get cricket," says Ben Dorning. "They like sport to be about man vs nature, not man against man. Otherwise they get all Scandinavian and cerebral about it – a friend was at a football match in Sweden recently when two groups of fans were singing different football chants at each other. He asked his Swedish friend what they were saying and apparently one group's chant was 'Push up more and stop sitting so deep' while the reply from the other group was 'Yes, but don't leave the centre backs exposed!'"
  37th over: New Zealand 153-3 (Ryder 83, Styris 16) Styris has started extremely well. He dances down the track to drive Botha's second ball emphatically over mid on for four and now has 16 from 14 balls. "This hitting this F5 has just got me into trouble," says Mark Taylor. "My manager, who can't see my screen but can see what I'm doing, has told to me that for the last ten minutes all she's seen me do is hit one key on my keyboard. Not sure I could explain that one?" Tell her it's 'X' and you're just a very very modern man.
  WICKET! New Zealand 153-4 (Styris b Morkel 16) I told you Styris looked good. That was one shot too many. He charged Morkel and tried a roundhouse slap over the off side, but the ball flew off the bottom edge and onto the stumps.
  38th over: New Zealand 154-4 (Ryder 83, Williamson 1) Just one from Morkel's over, and the wicket. "As a player for The Stockholm Academicals in the prestigious Swedish Premier (well, only) League, I'd like to formally invite Lord Selvey to report on one of our matches this summer," says Dan MacDonald. "I can personally vouch for his safety, although some of my shot selection will almost certainly be criminal."
  WICKET! New Zealand 156-5 (Ryder c sub (Ingram) b Tahir 83) New Zealand are starting to subside. Ryder top edges a sweep straight to deep square leg, and the substitute Colin Ingram takes an easy catch. Tahir charges around in celebration like a man who has cured baldness, banging his head back and forth in delight. There are few bowlers in world cricket who enjoy taking wickets as much as he does.
  39th over: New Zealand 157-5 (Williamson 3, N McCullum 0) Williamson cannot afford to hang around here. It's a big ask for a 20-year-old, but he needs to play himself in with singles, not dot balls. Just two runs from the over. "Apologies for attempting to use you like a local radio station," says Nick Williamson, "but if you were able to post a message about my JustGiving page I'd be very grateful indeed. I am a member of a team from Scottish Widows which is taking part in the Intelligent Sport UK Challenge in Exmoor from 16-19 June 2011. We are competing to raise funds on behalf of Children 1st (effectively the Scottish branch of the NSPCC), which is obviously a great cause. Even better is that Lloyds Banking Group (of which we are part) has pledged to match anything we manage to raise."
  40th over: New Zealand 164-5 (Williamson 10, N McCullum 0) Wiliamson edges Morkel just short of Smith at slip. He then works one nicely through midwicket for three in an over that brings seven. New Zealand are still just about in this game. "Mark Taylor can avoid his manager's glare by using the right mouse button to bring up a menu, and the left clicking refresh," says Paul Wakefield, who may or may not have thought this through.
  41st over: New Zealand 168-5 (Williamson 12, N McCullum 2) Four singles from Tahir's over. "Having met the erstwhile children's TV presenter Dave Benson Phillips, I can assure you that that lass on Dancing on Ice's jauntiness would pale into insignificance," says James Prout. "He is as jaunty and relentlessly happy at 6 in the morning off stage/camera as he is at 4 in the afternoon on stage/camera dropping parents into the gunk dunk. Yes the time I met him at that ungodly hour, I was hungover. My day was a long and tortuous one."
  42nd over: New Zealand 169-5 (Williamson 12, N McCullum 3) Nathan McCullum edges Steyn's second ball on the half volley to the keeper de Villiers. Only one run from an excellent over. "To be absolutely certain of an early start, make sure you acquire not only a small child, but at least one cat," says Richard O'Hagan. "If the child does not wake you at the crack of dawn, the cat almost certainly will. For guaranteed results, get more than one cat, that way you can be sure that if one of them isn't moaning about a lack of food or trying to show off a mouse, the other certainly will be. Or they'll be fighting with each other. I've even tried making mine watch Tom & Jerry and they still don't get it."
  43rd over: New Zealand 171-5 (Williamson 13, N McCullum 4) South Africa are squeezing this innings very impressively. Two from Peterson's over, which means the last six have brought only 18 runs and two wickets. "I had two root canals last Friday," chirps Michael Behl. "The pain wasn't too bad but on Wednesday night I was eating pasta sauce with bacon in it, I bit down on a piece of bacon and it hurt, like really, really hurt. I never thought bacon would ever cause me pain. Now I've been in pain since then and I have a final root canal booked for 3.45pm today. This pretty much ruins my Friday, the only thing I could hope for is South Africa losing, it would alleviate some of the inevitable pain." Root canals on consecutive Fridays? Dumb luck. That gives a whole new meaning to the Friday feeling.
  44th over: New Zealand 174-5 (Williamson 15, N McCullum 5) Still no sign of a Powerplay, or any power play. Three singles from Steyn's over. This is slipping away from New Zealand. "Robin Hazlehurst's advice in the 8th over," begins Steve Johnson. "Because it was very boring you won't recall that you posted my advice earlier this tournament regarding the positives of small children in overcoming the 'clean glasses' fixation. Are you starting to see a trend? Listen to the fans, Smyth. Listen to the fans. You know it makes sense… (I can't provide much advice on the 'finding the right woman' bit. Except these things take time, even if you're the most inept etc.)"
  45th over: New Zealand 187-5 (Williamson 23, N McCullum 6) New Zealand finally take the batting Powerplay, and Robin Peterson's ninth over disappears for 13. Williamson mows the second over ball over mid on for six, a fine shot, and then McCullum misses a huge swipe at a ball that races away for four byes. "SA choking again..." says Andre van der Walt. "Luckily they're choking NZ this time."
  WICKET! New Zealand 188-6 (N McCullum c Duminy b Steyn 6) This might be a blessing in disguise for New Zealand. Nathan McCullum's grim innings of 6 in 18 balls, in which the only thing he middled was fresh air, ends when he swipes a slower ball from Steyn up in the air and straight to point. Great work from Steyn, who is a master when it comes to death bowling. And new-ball bowling, and middle-overs bowling...
  46th over: New Zealand 189-6 (Williamson 24, Oram 0) Steyn has brilliant figures of 8-0-25-2. He is so good.
  47th over: New Zealand 196-6 (Williamson 26, Oram 6) Jacob Oram just need to score 40 not out off 15 balls. No pressure. He sweeps his second ball, from Tahir, behind square for four. "Can someone explain why Oram is batting below Nathan McCullum?" says Anand. "Wasn't Oram supposed to be one of the big hitters?" No and yes.
  48th over: New Zealand 203-6 (Williamson 32, Oram 7) No boundaries in that Steyn over, but New Zealand do manage to bust their lungs to the tune of seven runs. Williamson would have been miles out had Faf du Plessis hit the stumps from mid off.
  WICKET! New Zealand 204-7 (Oram b Morkel 7) Oram misses, Morkel hits, and New Zealand's hopes of 230 or more have now gone. That was an excellent first delivery back from Morkel, right on target and hitting the top of off stump when Oram missed a mighty hoick.
  WICKET! New Zealand 210-8 (Vettori b Morkel 6) Morne Morkel cleans Vettori up with a wonderful slower yorker. Seven balls remaining. There was an odd bit of commentary from Mark Nicholas, who screamed "EEEEEEEEE'S GOT 'IM!" but with the "EEEEE" sounding like something out of Bullseye.
  49th over: New Zealand 211-8 (Williamson 32, Woodcock 1) From the last 12 overs, New Zealand have scored 58 for the loss of five wickets. South Africa have been fantastic in the field.
  50th over: New Zealand 221-8 (Williamson 38, Woodcock 3) The last over of the innings from Steyn goes for 10, including a boundary over extra cover from Williamson and a wide off what should have been the last ball. Williamson's cameo of 38 from 41 balls has given New Zealand a chance, but South Africa were superb in the field and would probably reach their target of 222 nine times out of ten. Alan Gardner will type you through the first 10 overs of New Zealand reply in half an hour or so; you can email him on alan.gardner.casual@guardian.co.uk.
  INNINGS BREAK
  Afternoon, chooks. How are we? I was going to mock up a picture of Graeme Smith wearing a snood to display at the top of the page throughout the South Africa run chase but in the end I couldn't be bothered didn't have time. Anyway, to those asking about the absence of scorecard and popup – we only get them for England games. You didn't think this was a proper operation, did you?
  Here's Ant Pease: "Short of turning up like The Dude from The Big Lebowski (or El Duderino if you're not into that whole brevity thing) complete with jazz woodbine, how can your email officially pronounce you to be more casual than Bull?" Haven't you seen Bully's new byline photo? He's a married man, now. The Dude abides no longer ...
  1st over: South Africa 8-0 (target: 222, Amla 7, Smith 1) South Africa can't mess this one up, can they? Anyway, we're about to get going again. Nathan McCullum is going to bowl the first over – a somewhat leftfield choice, even by this tournament's standards. He's also starting around the wicket, to the right-handed Amla ... who leans into a couple of lazily effective cover drives, taking a two and a four from the first three balls. Hang on, what's this ...
  WICKET! Amla c Vettori b N McCullum 7 (1st over: South Africa 8-1, target: 222) That's a very unfortunate way to go, as Amla is caught at slip after his edge rebounded up off wicketkeeper Brendon McCullum's boot! It looked like a bump-ball on first sight but the McCullums and Vettori both knew what had happened. Amla cut a ball that kept low, the shot deflecting on to the toe of McCullum's boot and popping straight up to Vettori.
  2nd over: South Africa 10-1 (target: 222, Smith 3, Kallis 0) "I generally dont like to do a Warnie, but I predict NZ will win this match by about 15 runs with Daniel Vettori scaring the SA with his moustache to get five wickets," prognosticates Pratik Dubey. Vettori, sadly, has got rid of his 'stache, but he opens at the other end – spinners at both ends! Smith almost runs himself out but just manages to beat the direct hit from long-leg.
  3rd over: South Africa 15-1 (target: 222, Smith 6, Kallis 2) It's an over of shoes (ones and twos, for those wanting in their cockney) from McCullum. The good news for South Africa is that New Zealand were 6-1 for one after three overs of their innings. They're miles ahead! "The run chase total is ominous," warns Ian Copestake. "In South Africa 222 is the number of Diabilto, the very small devil." Has anyone ever had to chase 666? Obviously you'd have no chance of getting it ...
  4th over: South Africa 18-1 (target: 222, Smith 6, Kallis 5) Here's a good link from Mo Holkar, who points out that Amla's dismissal is reminiscent of this David Gower number. You do see them ... I'm sure there's a more recent example lurking in among the shadowy recesses of my brain. Vettori rattles through six balls of left-arm darts.
  5th over: South Africa 20-1 (target: 222, Smith 7, Kallis 6) Brendon McCullum thinks he's got Kallis, strangled down the legside off his brother's bowling ... but it looks like it just clipped his pads. The good thing about there being two spinners on so early is that I'll get to hand back to Smyth asap; the bad: I have no time to get up to speed!
  6th over: South Africa 27-1 (target: 222, Smith 8, Kallis 12) The bear thumps a drive down the ground for four ... and then gets hit on his back pad after stomping down the track. New Zealand decide not to review it and although it was probably hitting leg the decision wouldn't have been overturned. "Anand here," writes Anand, helpfully, "writing from the Netherlands. Have you ever seen something as garish as McCullum's gloves? Looks like one of those traffic policemen. IF he were a bowler wearing an arm band like that, I am sure the batsmen would object. If SRT, the man who can detect miniscule movement in and around the sightscreen were to bat, he would object to the gloves 😉." They're not as bad as Kevin O'Brien's hairdo.
  7th over: South Africa 33-1 (target: 222, Smith 9, Kallis 17) Tim Southee comes on to give these opening exchanges a more traditional flavour. He's joint-fourth on the tournament wicket-takers list but it doesn't look like the pitch will be offering him much assistance today. Kallis pings one off his legs for four. "Don't know about chasing 666," says Vincent Barreto, "but Victoria beat Tasmania by an innings and 666 runs in Melbourne about 1922 … and Tasmania has devils!!!" Irony, eh? If I only I knew what it meant.
  8th over: South Africa 36-1 (target: 222, Smith 11, Kallis 18) Vettori (4-0-15-0) continues to keep a lid on things. A delivery that drifted across Smith but didn't turn appreciably snicks a thick-ish outside edge, with the ball running down towards third man for a couple. A first half-century of the tournament from Smith would go a long way to averting South Africa's need for the Heimlich manoeuvre at any stage today.
  9th over: South Africa 44-1 (target: 222, Smith 13, Kallis 24) A top edged hook from Kallis alls short of the man running in from long leg. Southee then strays on to Kallis's pads and he swats the ball away like (stretched simile alert!) a bear dismissing bees as he goes about collecting his honey. "As a mnemonic, I find irony to be very much like rain on your wedding day. I'm sure other examples also exist." Intriguing, Ant Pease. Tell us more.
  10th over: South Africa 50-1 (target: 222, Smith 18, Kallis 25) [Edges towards exit] So, Oram's coming on to chop down some trees/take a few Saffer wickets, just as Rob prepares to retake his sweaty seat. If someone could Photoshop a picture of Oram as a lumberjack and then send it in, you'd make me very happy. Oram is pretty accurate from the get-go but his last ball is wide and slashed through point for four by Smith. Right, now send your static and feedback to rob.smyth@guardian.co.uk. I need some lunch.
  11th over: South Africa 54-1 (target: 222, Smith 20, Kallis 27) Hello boys! Southee forces Kallis to take evasive action with a good bouncer in an over that includes four singles. South Africa are cruising and are going to have to work extremely hard to cock this up.
  12th over: South Africa 58-1 (target: 222, Smith 22, Kallis 29) Oram galumphs in for some more. It's all a bit futile, and not in the Nathan Barley sense. Four singles from the over. "Is there anything more disconcerting than filling in a hotel mini-bar form whilst very hungover and seeing that the purchase options include mouthwash and shoe polish," weeps Stephen Cottreell. "For one horrible moment I thought I'd bottomed out. Like Christopher sitting on Ade's dog in the Sopranos."
  13th over: South Africa 60-1 (target: 222, Smith 23, Kallis 30) Two more singles from Southee's over. This is easy for South Africa. Somewhere in a dark corner of my brain, Big Daddy is beating his chest, Tarzan-style, while a baying crowd chant "EASY! EASY! EASY!" I do miss Big Daddy. Look at the state of this. "I'm going to the cinema tomorrow to see Submarine," says Louise Wright, mistaking this for Twitter. "My dad is going with me. It's suddenly occurred to me that with it being a coming-of-age film, it might be full of sex scenes and thus be v embarrassing to watch when accompanied by a parent. Anyone seen it and know whether I've made a dreadful choice of film in that respect, please? If so, suggestions for avoidance tactics would be welcome." One of my best friends went to see American Pie with his ma. Imagine.
  14th over: South Africa 68-1 (target: 222, Smith 28, Kallis 33) The left-arm spinner Luke Woodcock, playing only his third ODI, comes on to bowl. His first ball is a nervous wide half-volley that Smith blitzes through extra cover for four, but the fourth is a brute that spits past Kallis's outside edge. Where did that come from?
  WICKET! South Africa 69-2 (Smith c sub (How) b Oram 28) Graeme Smith's poor tournament continues with a very soft dismissal. He reached well wide of off stump at a nothing delivery from Jacob Oram and sliced it straight to backward point, where the substitute Jamie How took a smart catch moving to his left.
  15th over: South Africa 69-2 (target: 222, Kallis 34, de Villiers 0) This is the big partnership, between arguably South Africa's two best batsmen. If New Zealand can winkle out one more then South Africa will be three down. "I saw Submarine last night," says Jos Roberts, mistaking this for Twitter. "Nothing really to make your parents uncomfortable, other than Paddy Considine with an amazing mullet! Pretty funny though."
  16th over: South Africa 72-2 (target: 222, Kallis 36, de Villiers 1) Three singles from Woodcock's over, which includes a couple of excellent stops from Guptill in the covers. "When I came of age," says Ian Copestake, "there was no sex involved."
  17th over: South Africa 74-2 (target: 222, Kallis 38, de Villiers 1) Kallis flicks Oram to leg for a couple, the only runs from that over. It's a fairly quiet spell in the match.
  18th over: South Africa 81-2 (target: 222, Kallis 39, de Villiers 7) Woodcock is having a bad time of it. His first ball is a full toss that de Villiers clips for four, and there are three more singles. South Africa need 131 from 32 overs. It should be a doddle. Should.
  19th over: South Africa 81-2 (target: 222, Kallis 39, de Villiers 7) Oram bowls a good maiden to de Villiers, so his figures are now 5-1-13-1. "I've learnt two valuable lessons today," says Lizzy Ammon. "1) Never bet on Graeme Smith 2) don't expect a four-year-old to prefer watching NZ vs SA to watching Star Wars. There was a physical wrestle for the remote. I didn't win."
  20th over: South Africa 87-2 (target: 222, Kallis 41, de Villiers 11) Vettori brings himself on for Woodcock, which has to be the right move. Five from the over, including a very tight two to third man from de Villiers. "When I first moved to the UK I had trouble grasping your concept of 'irony'," says Marie Meyer. "Then I went to Torquay for a weekend because I had heard it described as 'the English Riviera'. I get it now."
  21th over: South Africa 93-2 (target: 222, Kallis 42, de Villiers 16) That is an exquisite stroke from AB de Villiers, a square drive for four from a perfectly good delivery by Oram. Things may change, but for the moment this feels like a totally routine run chase. "Lizzy Ammon's four-year-old sounds like a Big Daddy in the making," says Ian Copestake. "All he needs to complete his fate is to be called Shirley."
  22nd over: South Africa 97-2 (target: 222, Kallis 45, de Villiers 17) Kallis charges Vettori but is beaten in the flight, and his drive lands just in front of the man running back from mid on. The next ball is fluller and quicker and zips past the outside edge. Very smart bowling from Vettori.
  23rd over: South Africa 103-2 (target: 222, Kallis 46, de Villiers 22) Another wonderfully timed drive from de Villiers, this time through the covers for four off Southee. He has a disgusting amount of ability. Kallis then survives a token run-out referral after a direct hit from mid on. "My old English teacher took his wife to see American Pie in the mistaken belief it was American Beauty," says Andrew Fraser. "He told us that he wasn't sure it was quite the classic others claimed it as…" When I was about 12 my Dad asked me to recommend some films that he could order from his book club thing. I knew he liked cop films, but I got 48 Hours mixed up with 9 1/2 Weeks. I wish I was making that up.
  24th over: South Africa 108-2 (target: 222, Kallis 47, de Villiers 25) Kallis is slow to set off for a leg bye towards square leg and would probably have been run out by a direct hit from the wicketkeeper Brendon McCullum. Five from Vettori's over. "There's a scene in Being There where Shirley MacLaine takes Peter Sellers' oft-stated line of 'I like to watch' very literally," says Matt Emerson. "I watched that with my Mum and my Nan when I was about 14...my face could have been used on a Pantone reference chart as a replacement for crimson..."
  WICKET! South Africa 108-3 (Kallis c Oram b Southee 47) A fantastic running catch from Jacob Oram gives New Zealand a sniff. Kallis clubbed a mighty pull towards deep midwicket, where Oram appeared from nowhere to take a two-handed catch above his head on the run. That's a brilliant piece of fielding, especially for such a giant man.
  25th over: South Africa 110-3 (target: 222, de Villiers 26, Duminy 1) Another quick wicket would make this really interesting, because South Africa have a relatively fragile lower order. "I have a picture of Giant Haystacks in my wallet that I have had for twenty years," says David Weston. "It is torn from a pub quiz sheet. The quiz was in the Johnson Arms public house in Dunkirk, Nottingham. I'll let you see it if you want." I like the fact that you don't feel the need to explain this behaviour. After all, keeping a picture of a huge hirsute wrestler in a wallet is precisely what all right-thinking people would do.
  26th over: South Africa 113-3 (target: 222, de Villiers 28, Duminy 2) Nathan McCullum replaces Vettori, who bowled better than figures of 7-0-29-0 suggest. Three from a quiet over. "My American inlaws, septuagenarians both, decided to go and see the film Quills (which, for the uninitiated, is about the Marquis de Sade)," says Richard O'Hagan. "I think they are still recovering from the experience." They are not the only ones.
  27th over: South Africa 120-3 (target: 222, de Villiers 34, Duminy 3) Duminy drags an attempted pull onto his body off the bowling of Southee; then de Villiers played a stunning on drive for four, through the legs of Duminy at the non-striker's end. He looks in fantastic nick. "The 48 Hours/9 1/2 weeks confusion is understandable," says Dan Smith. "9 1/2 weeks is a completely unrealistic period for a passionate love affair. While 'Gone in 60 Seconds' turns out to be a film about car theft."
  WICKET! South Africa 121-4 (Duminy b N McCullum 3) Now then. Duminy misses an angled-bat slap at a flighted delivery from McCullum that goes straight on to hit the off stump. That's a hideous shot. Every time you think the game is going away from New Zealand they take a wicket. If they get one more they will arguably be on top.
  WICKET! South Africa 121-5 (de Villiers run out 35) It's happening. South Africa are doing it again. I don't believe this. New Zealand have got the huge wicket of AB de Villiers, who was called through for a seriously dodgy single to midwicket and was just short of his ground when Brendon McCullum claimed the throw from Guptill and shattered the stumps. It went to the third umpire but New Zealand knew it was out. Before leaving the crease, de Villiers almost kicked off with a couple of New Zealand fielders, presumably because of an overzealous send-off. This is a remarkable turnaround, and that is such a big wicket because de Villiers was in sublime touch.
  28th over: South Africa 121-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 0, Botha 0) They couldn't. Could they? In fact, what happened with de Villiers was this: a number of New Zealand fielders, including the substitute Kyle Mills, were right in du Plessis's grille, pointing out that he had run out the best player, so de Villiers came over to support du Plessis. A couple of them will get done by the match referee. If they win, they will not care one jot about that. "Statistics question," says Andre Van der Walt. "Has anyone ever followed OBO when they had the option to watch a match?" That's not a statistics question. That's a just-how-badly-has-humanity-gone-wrong question.
  29th over: South Africa 122-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 1, Botha 0) Aggressive captaincy from Daniel Vettori, who brings himself back into the attack. He almost skids a couple of quicker ones through du Plessis, and there's just one from the over. "Those collars are starting to look a bit tight on the South African jerseys," says Mark O'Neil.
  30th over: South Africa 123-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 2, Botha 0) South Africa's lower order has some handy players, most notably Botha and Peterson, but it's nowhere near the McMillian-Pollock-Klusener vintage. One from McCullum's over. This game is wide open now, and in fact New Zealand are probably marginal favourites. "I still cringe at the memory of seeing Se7en with my mum when I was just 18," says Andrew Banks. "She overheard me saying I wanted to see it on the phone and decided to treat me despite my protestations that she wouldn't like it. Not sure she's recovered, and sticks almost entirely to Miss Marple nowadays..."
  31st over: South Africa 125-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 3, Botha 1) Woodcock replaces Vettori and has a biggish shout for LBW against du Plessis. It was going down leg. Just two from the over, and the requirement is now 97 from 114 balls. "Unless South Africa can call up a last minute replacement and get their young off-spinner Heimlich in at 8, you'd have to say it looks like they're doing it again," says Ant Pease. Honk!
  32nd over: South Africa 127-5 (target: 222, du Plessis 4, Botha 2) The South African batsmen are just regrouping for now. They look shell-shocked. The last five overs have brought seven runs and two wickets. "I often OBO whilst watching a game, sometimes even the same game," says Richard O'Hagan. "However, I am ferociously loyal and would never try and OBO/MBM several different sports at once *coughNAYLORcoughcoughcough*"
  WICKET! South Africa 128-6 (Botha b Oram 2) This is an astonishing collapse. Botha is bowled by a beautiful leg cutter from Oram that hits the top of off stump. That is a jaffa. South Africa have lost three wickets for eight in six overs, and if they lose this match they are never – ever – going to hear the end of it.
  33rd over: South Africa 128-6 (target: 222, du Plessis 5, Peterson 0) Even before that wicket, one of the South African backroom staff had his head in his hands. Then he started shaking his head sadly. He's completely given up! That's hilarious. He might as well be listening to this. "I saw Four Weddings and a Funeral with my parents when I was 15," says Paul Wakefield. "The loud sex scene left me utterly mortified, whilst my parents thought it hilarious." The scene, your mortification, or both?
  34th over: South Africa 129-6 (target: 222, du Plessis 6, Peterson 0) Is it still deja vu if it happens again and again? Nathan McCullum is in his element, racing through his overs in little more than a couple of minutes. Only one run from that, which makes it nine from the last seven.
  WICKET! South Africa 132-7 (Peterson c B McCullum b Oram 0) South Africa have completely gone. Peterson wafts hideously outside off stump and gets a thin inside edge to the keeper. South Africa have lost four wickets for 11 runs in eight never-to-be-forgotten overs.
  35th over: South Africa 141-7 (target: 222, du Plessis 13, Steyn 5) Steyn touches his first ball to the fine leg boundary and then du Plessis, who has to play his shots, slams a superb boundary through extra cover. South Africa will not believe this is happening to them again. It was supposed to be different this time. They had proved they were a different team by winning Test series in Australia, England and Pakistan. They had the variety in their attack, the experience in their top order. They won the group and got the easiest quarter-final draw. They started the quarter-final brilliantly, calmly controlling it for 75 overs. And then it happened. Like it always bloody happens.
  36th over: South Africa 142-7 (target: 222, du Plessis 13, Steyn 6) Steyn is a very tough man, an Australian in nature, and he is well capable of hanging around for 10 overs if du Plessis can do the bulk of the scoring. Steyn works the last ball of McCullum's over for a single, the only run from that over. "I'm contemplating making strangled and spluttering sounds at my South African mate after he took such pleasure in England losing to Ireland," says Mike McCarthy. "Contemplating it, because (a) we'll lose by 200 runs tomorrow and (b) he's a lot harder than me."
  37th over: South Africa 146-7 (target: 222, du Plessis 15, Steyn 7) Luke Woodcock comes back into the attack. His six remaining overs are so important, because he has been NZ's weakest bowler today, and he starts with a wide. Four from the over. New Zealand might have to think about using a sixth bowler, maybe Scott Styris or Jesse Ryder. "When I went travelling at 18, I stopped off at my great uncle and aunt in Canada," says Andrew Fraser. "Me and my friend convinced my great uncle to join his local video rental store and took out loads of films to while away the Canadian evenings. This seemingly foolproof plan collapsed as badly as the Saffers are when my great aunt joined us for American History... I still sweat when I think back to her reaction to the vigorous sex scene that starts the film. And not in a good way."
  WICKET! South Africa 146-8 (Steyn c Oram b N McCullum 8) What hell kinda shot is that? Steyn was inadvertently monopolising the strike, and the pressure – dot, dot, dot – got to him when he had a gruesome heave that flew off the edge. Oram, who couldn't stay out of this game if he tried, took a gleeful catch diving forward at backward point.
  38th over: South Africa 146-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 15, Morkel 0) Nathan McCullum finished with sensational figures of 10-1-24-3. South Africa were 120 for three after 27 overs, you know. I told you New Zealand just needed to stay in the game! And, while people will focus on South Africa, New Zealand have been wonderful. The moment they smelt weakness, they were all over South Africa like a cheap rash. "It's déjà vu all over again'," quotes Daniel Harris. "Berra explained that this quote originated when he witnessed Mickey Mantle and Roger Maris repeatedly hit back-to-back home runs in the Yankees' seasons in the early 1960s."
  39th over: South Africa 150-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 17, Morkel 1) South Africa have taken the batting Powerplay, a desperate move that presumably means du Plessis is going to go for it. Vettori counters by bringing himself back into the attack. du Plessis square drives for a couple and then drives a single down the ground. Here's a simple email from Rahul Nayyar, which will some up how plenty of folk are feeling: "Can't stop laughing." Then, just in case I miss that email, he follows up with "ROFL". You have to feel for South Africa, though. Of all their chokes, this is probably the worst.
  40th over: South Africa 156-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 22, Morkel 2) du Plessis smears an attempted yorker from Southee down the ground for four. This isn't quite over, not while he is there and not while New Zealand still have five fifth-bowler overs to bowl. South Africa need 66 from 10 overs with two wickets remaining.. As Mark Corrigan says at the start of season four of Peep Show, how the eff has it come to this? "When New Zealand were scoring slowly and losing wickets, you were full of praise for South Africa's skill and pressure," says Andy Fyfe. "Now it's all about how South Africa are throwing it away. Maybe some respect for NZ is in order? They've stuck with a plan (flawed as it may have been during their innings), backed themselves – a trait commentators are only too happy to recognise in Australia and England – and now the pressure they've applied is paying off. There are two teams playing this game..." Yep, it's a fair cop. Inevitably we focus on South Africa when something like this happens, but New Zealand have been great in the field – particularly Vettori as captain.
  41st over: South Africa 161-8 (target: 222, du Plessis 27, Morkel 2) du Plessis turned down a run off the last ball of the previous over, so that he could keep the strike, and he whips Vettori's third ball superbly past mid on for four. Five from the over, and Gary Naylor has just reminded me of this email, sent much earlier in this innings: "Re: 11th over: 'South Africa are cruising and are going to have to work extremely hard to cock this up'. You really are such an old hand at the OBO game aren't you? Like Glenn McGrath setting up a batsman with five short of a length before the toe-crusher."
  42nd over: South Africa 164-8 (need 58 from 48 balls; du Plessis 29, Morkel 3) Just three singles from Southee's over. That means that du Plessis keeps the strike, but the required rate has risen above seven an over. Meanwhile, Stephen Cottrell has a pop quiz for us, but you don't need to be a hotshot to get the right answer: "Which C was a 1990 album by the Beautiful South, following their 1989 debut, 'Welcome to the Beautiful South'?"
  WICKET! South Africa 172-9 (du Plessis c Southee b Oram 36) It's all over. du Plessis, dropped earlier in the over, rifles Oram low to cover, where Southee takes a good low catch on the edge of the circle. In the commentary box, Mark Nicholas actually starts singing "Oraaaaaaaaam!" Seriously, he started singing. Singing. But you can understand why, because Jacob Oram has had an incredible hour and a half in the field and with the ball.
  43rd over: South Africa 172-9 (need 50 from 42 balls; Morkel 4, Tahir 0) The No11, Imran Tahir, is about as good a batsman as me or you, so don't expect any miracles. This is a mind-blowing collapse. "Deja vu is illusory, which is presumably what SA are experiencing as they'll think it's all a bad dream," says John Starbuck. "What we have here is serial vu."
  WICKET! South Africa 172 all out (Morkel c sub b Woodcock 4). NEW ZEALAND WIN BY 49 RUNS Morne Morkel clouts Luke Woodcock to Jamie How at long off to spark delirious celebrations in Mirpur. New Zealand cannot believe they have won this game. Nobody can. It's one of the most amazing twists in World Cup history. South Africa were 108 for two and then 121 for three, but they fell apart in a fashion that was astonishing even by their standards. New Zealand were outplayed for 75 overs, yet they stayed in the game and then mauled South Africa when the pressure was on.
  It's a stunning performance from a team who always overachieve at World Cups, and who will now play in their sixth World Cup semi-final out of ten – even though this is the first knockout game they have ever won. But, really, today is all about South Africa. Graeme Smith walks onto the field wearing a million-yard stare. You would not believe the puss on him. After four years of almost ceaseless excellence from South Africa in all forms of the game, it is going to take them a long, long time to understand how and why this happened. They probably never will.
  Thanks for your emails. See you tomorrow for the other quarter-final; I forget who's playing.

Chipungahelo: Lundenga anatuingilia Miss Utali Send to a friend Thursday, 24 March 2011 20:06

Kalunde Jamal
MUANDAAJI wa mashindano ya Miss Utalii, Gideon Chipungahelo amesema mashindano ya Miss Tanzania yamepoteza mwelekeo na kuanza kujiingiza kwenye mambo ya Miss utalii.

Akizungumza na Mwananchi, Chipungahelo alisema mashindano hayo dhumuni lake ilikwa ni mrembo wa dunia lakini sasa wameanzisha na Miss Utalii wa Ndani hii inaonyesha ni jinsi gani wamepoteza mwelekeo.

"Mimi binafsi sina ugomvi na waandaaji wa Miss Tanzania lakini naona kama wamepoteza maana nzima ambayo ilikuwa ni mrembo atakaepatikana aiwakilishe taifa kwenye mashindano ya mrembo wa dunia.
"Cha kushangaza sasa wameanzisha na mashindano mengine ya Miss Utalii wa ndani kwa kuangalia tu utajua wamepoteza mwelekeo na dhumuni la mashidano hayo kwa ujumla na kuingilia eneo letu," alisema Chipungahelo.

Kwa upande wake mkurugenzi wa kampuni ya Rino Agency ambaye ndio mwandaaji wa Miss Tanzania, Hashimu Lundenga alisema kuwa hakuna mtu maalumu aliyekuwa na mamlaka ya kutangaza utalii hapa nchini.

"Sisi ndio vinara wa mashindano ya urembo nchini na suala la kutangaza utalii sio la mtu mmoja na hakuna mmiliki wa masuala ya utalii nchini, kila Mtanzania ana haki ya kuinadi nchi na zaidi ni utalii wake.

"Sina ugomvi na waandaaji wa mashindano ya miss utalii ila nawaambia tu kuwa hakuna mwenye mamlaka ya kutangaza utalii hili jukumu ni la kila Mtanzania kwa nafasi yake," alisema Lundenga.

Wasanii wa injili kuja wiki moja kabla Send to a friend Thursday, 24 March 2011 20:03

Vicky Kimaro
WASANII wa muziki wa injili wa nje ya Tanzania, watakaoshiriki Tamasha la Pasaka, watawasili nchini wiki moja kabla ya kufanyika tamasha hilo kwenye Ukumbi wa Diamond Jubilee, Aprili 24.

Mwenyekiti wa Kamati ya maandalizi ya tamasha hilo, Alex Msama aliiambia Mwananchi jana kuwa wasanii watawasili wiki moja kabla ya tamasha ili kujipanga kabla ya kupanda jukwaani.

"Tumeonelea wafike wiki moja kabla ya tamasha kwa sababu kufanya hivyo kwanza itawasaidia kufanya maandalizi ya mwisho kabla ya siku yenyewe," alisema Msama.

Muimbaji wa Kenya, Anastazia Mukabwa amethibitisha kushiriki katika tamasha hilo na atakuja na kundi la waimbaji wanane.

Mukabwa anatamba na kibao chake Vua kiatu aliomshirikisha Rose Muhando. Nyimbo nyingine katika albam hiyo ni Ee Mungu, Usiwe Manamba, Nzizile, Nishike Mkono, wanaokudharau na Mfalme.

Mwingine ni muimbaji wa Injili kutoka nchini Zambia, Ephraim Sekeleti ambaye
atatua nchini akiwa na albamu yake mpya inayoitwa Jina la Mungu Mwenyewe.

Kwa mujibu wa Msama, Sekeleti atyakayekuja na waimbaji 10, atatumia nafasi kuitambulisha albamu yake mpya ambayo baadhi ya nyimbo zake ni Uniongoze na Kidonge cha Yesu.

Waimbaji wengine wanaotarajiwa kushiriki tamasha hilo watatoka Uganda, Afrika Kusini, Rwanda na Jamhuri ya Kidemokrasia ya Kongo (DRC).

Habari za Michezo na Burudani

TFF haitambui kupinduliwa kwa Rage

Imeandikwa na Betram Lengama; Tarehe: 25th March 2011 @ 23:30 Imesomwa na watu: 68; Jumla ya maoni: 0








BAADA ya kutokea mapinduzi ya uongozi katika Chama cha soka cha mkoa wa Tabora (TAREFA) na kuenguliwa kwa viongozi halali wa chama hicho Shirikisho la soka Tanzania (TFF) limeingilia mgogoro huo na kutoa msimamo wake.

Katibu Mkuu wa TFF Angetile Osiah &#8216;Ngeta' amebainisha kuwa Shirikisho hilo ambalo ndilo msimamizi mkuu wa masuala yote ya soka hapa nchini halitambui mabadiliko ya uongozi wa TAREFA hivyo inaendelea kuwatambua viongozi wanaodaiwa kuenguliwa madarakani katika mapinduzi hayo yaliyofanywa mapema wiki hii.

Ngeta alisema hayo jana ikiwa ni saa chache kabla ya kuanza kwa Mkutano Mkuu wa siku mbili wa Shirikisho hilo ambao unaanza leo katika ukumbi wa NSSF-Waterfront jijini Dar es Salaam na kutoa tahadhari kuwa viongozi waliochukua madaraka katika mapinduzi hayo hawatoruhusiwa kuingia katika mkutano.

"Kamati ya utendaji ya TFF iliyokaa juzi kujadili mambo mbalimbali ikiwemo maandalizi ya mkutano mkuu pia ilijadili hali ya uongozi wa chama cha mpira wa miguu cha mkoa wa Tabora na kuiagiza kamati ya Sheria na Katiba, Sheria na Hadhi ya wachezaji kuangalia kwa kina mgogoro wa uongozi wa TAREFA na kutolea uamuzi," alisema Osiah.

Na kutokana na uamuzi huo kwa mujibu Osiah TFF itaendelea kutambua uongozi uliochaguliwa wa TAREFA hadi hapo kamati hiyo itakapotoa uamuzi wake kuhusiana na mgogoro ulioibuka katika chama hicho cha Tabora baada ya baadhi ya wajumbe wa mkutano mkuu wa mkoa huo kufanya mapinduzi ya uongozi na kumng'oa madarakani Mwenyekiti wake Ismail Rage.

Kutokana na msimamo huo wa TFF viongozi wa Tabora ambao watauwakilisha mkoa huo kwenye mkutano mkuu wa Shirikisho hilo ni Rage ambaye ni Mwenyekiti, Albert Sitta (Katibu Mkuu) na Yusuf Kitumbo ambaye ni Mjumbe wa mkutano mkuu.

Kwa mujibu wa taarifa zilizopatikana kutoka Tabora zinabainisha kuwa kinara wa mapinduzi hayo ambayo yamekiuka Katiba ya Tarefa alikuwa ni Mussa Ntimizi ambaye ni Mwenyekiti wa chama cha soka cha wilaya ya Uyui ambaye aliwania nafasi ya Uenyekiti wa Tarefa na kubwagwa na Rage.

Habari za Michezo na Burudani

Nizar, Babi, Mrwanda wakwama

Imeandikwa na Betram Lengama; Tarehe: 25th March 2011 @ 11:05 Imesomwa na watu: 500; Jumla ya maoni: 0



Beki Nadir Haroub (kulia) akimpiga chenga mshambuliaji Athumani Machupa wakati wa mazoezi ya Taifa Stars katika Uwanja wa Karume kujiandaa na mchezo wa kuwania kufuzu fainali za Afrika dhidi ya Jamhuri ya Afrika ya Kati Machi 26 Uwanja wa Taifa, Dar es Salaam. (Picha na Yusuf Badi).





NYOTA watatu wa &#8216;Taifa Stars' wanaosakata soka nje ya nchi, Nizar Khalfan, Abdi Kassim &#8216;Babi' na Danny Mrwanda, hawatokuwemo kwenye kikosi cha kesho kitakachocheza na Jamhuri ya Afrika ya Kati (CAR) kwenye Uwanja wa Taifa, Dar es Salaam.

Kocha wa Stars, Jan Poulsen, amesema mjini Dar es Salaam kuwa nyota hao wameshindwa kujiunga na wenzao kwa ajili ya mchezo huo wa kuwania tiketi ya kufuzu fainali za Mataifa ya Afrika (CAN) kutokana na kukosa ruhusa kwenye klabu zao.

Kushindwa huko kwa Khalfan anayechezea Vancouver Whitecaps ya Canada pamoja na Babi na Mrwanda ambao wapo klabu ya Dong Tam Long An ya Vietnam kunatokana na kuwepo matatizo ya mawasiliano kati ya Shirikisho la Soka Tanzania (TFF) na klabu zao.

Licha ya kuwakosa wachezaji hao, Poulsen alisema hakuwezi kuathiri kikosi chake, kwani anaamini waliopo ni imara na wanaweza kufanya vizuri.

Poulsen aliita wachezaji sita wa kulipwa katika kikosi chake kwa ajili ya mechi dhidi ya timu hiyo inayoongoza Kundi D, ambalo lina timu za Tanzania, Algeria na Morocco, lakini wachezaji watatu wamejiunga na wenzao.

Wachezaji hao ni Athumani Machupa anayecheza timu ya Vasuland ya Sweden, Idrisa Rajabu anayecheza Sofapaka ya Kenya na Henry Joseph anayecheza Kongsvinger ya Norway.

Akizungumzia mchezo huo wa kesho Uwanja wa Taifa, Dar es Salaam, Poulsen alisema Stars inahitaji ushindi wa udi na uvumba, ili ijiweke katika nafasi nzuri kwenye mbio za kuwania nafasi ya kufuzu fainali hizo zitakazoandaliwa kwa pamoja na nchi za Gabon na Equatorial Guinea.

"Pamoja na ukweli kuwa ninawafahamu kidogo tu wapinzani wetu ambao wanafanya vizuri katika kundi letu kwani wamewafunga Algeria na kutoka suluhu na Morocco, nina matumaini tutafanya vizuri katika mchezo wetu kutokana na maandalizi mazuri na endapo tutatumia vema uwanja wa nyumbani hasa kwa kuungwa mkono na mashabiki wote," alisema Poulsen.

Kwa upande wake kocha wa CAR, Mfaransa Accorsi Jules Francois alibainisha kuwa haijui kabisa Stars, lakini hilo sio tatizo kwani hali hiyo pia ilimkumba kabla ya kuumana na Algeria na Morocco na ataijua hiyo kesho uwanjani.

Wakati huohuo, TFF imeipatia jukumu la kuuza tiketi za mchezo huo wa Stars na CAR, kampuni ya Premier Sports Bingo ambayo inajishughulisha na michezo ya ubashiri wa matokeo mbalimbali ya mechi za soka na michezo mingine.

Habari za Michezo na Burudani

Samatta, Kado kuivaa Cameroon

Imeandikwa na Betram Lengama; Tarehe: 25th March 2011 @ 10:48 Imesomwa na watu: 266; Jumla ya maoni: 1








WACHEZAJI Mbwana Samatta na Shaaban Kado ambao wako na kikosi cha Taifa Stars, ambacho kesho kitaumana na Jamhuri ya Afrika ya Kati (CAR) wanatarajia kuondoka nchini mara baada ya mchezo huo kwenda kujiunga na kikosi cha Taifa cha vijana wenyewe umri chini ya miaka 23 ambacho kitakuwa nchini Cameroon.

Kocha wa kikosi hicho cha vijana ambacho kimeondoka Machi 24 mchana kwenda Cameroon kwa mchezo dhidi ya timu ya Taifa ya vijana ya huko, Jamhuri Kihwelo &#8216;Julio' alieleza hayo mara baada ya timu hiyo kukabidhiwa bendera ya Taifa na Mkurugenzi wa Maendeleo ya Michezo nchini Leonard Thadeo jijini Dar es Salaam.

Julio alisema pamoja na wachezaji hao awali kutokuwemo kwenye orodha ya wachezaji wanaoenda Cameroon, alisema sasa wataungana na kikosi chake mara baada ya kukamilika mchezo wa Stars na CAR.

Mchezo huo utakaofanyika Jumapili ni wa kuwania tiketi ya kucheza michezo ya Olimpiki itakayofanyika mwakani katika Jiji la London nchini Uingereza.

"Kado na Samatta watapanda ndege kuja kuungana nasi Cameroon kwa ajili ya kukiongezea nguvu kikosi chetu mara tu baada ya mchezo wa Stars na Jamhuri ya Afrika ya Kati," alisema Julio.

Alisema hiyo inatokana na juhudi ambazo zimefanywa na Shirikisho la Soka Tanzania (TFF) kuhakikisha wachezaji hao ambao walishindwa kujiunga na wenzao kwenye maandalizi ya mchezo huo dhidi ya Cameroon kutokana na kuwepo pia Taifa Stars wanashiriki mchezo huo.

Akizungumzia kikosi chake, Julio alisema vijana wake wako katika hali nzuri pamoja na kushindwa kupata mechi za kimataifa za kujipima nguvu.

Naye Mkurugenzi wa Maendeleo ya Michezo nchini, Thadeo ambaye alimkabidhi Nahodha wa timu hiyo Salum Telela bendera ya Taifa, alisema ana matumaini timu hiyo itafanya vizuri kutokana na maandalizi mazuri na kuwataka vijana hao kudumisha nidhamu na uzalendo ili kulinda taswira nzuri ya Tanzania kimataifa.

Habari za Michezo na Burudani

Kocha wa Oman aitwa kumfua Kaseja

Imeandikwa na Betram Lengama; Tarehe: 24th March 2011 @ 23:55 Imesomwa na watu: 471; Jumla ya maoni: 0








SIMBA imeimarisha benchi lake la ufundi kwa ajili ya mchezo wa marudiano raundi ya kwanza Ligi ya Mabingwa Afrika dhidi ya TP Mazembe utakaofanyika Aprili 2, mwaka huu.

Akizungumza mjini Dar es Salaam, Mwenyekiti wa klabu hiyo, Ismail Rage amesema wamemuongeza kocha wa timu za vijana wa klabu hiyo Abdallah Kibaden &#8216;King' pamoja na kumleta kocha wa makipa Amour Awadh kutoka Oman.

Kocha huyo wa makipa amekuwa akija kwa kipindi fulani kuwanoa makipa wa Simba kila wanapokuwa na mechi kubwa na huondoka baada ya muda mfupi.

Lakini ujio wake sasa utakuwa na manufaa zaidi kwa Simba kutokana na kipa mahiri wa timu hiyo Juma Kaseja kuonekana katika siku za karibuni kiwango chake kushuka, hivyo ujio wake unaweza kumsaidia kuboresha kiwango.

Rage alisema Kibaden amepewa jukumu la kuinoa Simba kwa sasa kutokana na Kocha Mkuu Patrick Phiri, ambaye alienda kwao Zambia kumuuguza mkewe baada ya mchezo dhidi ya Mazembe uliofanyika Lubumbashi kuchelewa kurejea nchini.

"Tumeamua kumpa Kibaden jukumu la kuiandaa timu wakati Phiri akiwa hayupo na atakaporudi ataendelea kumsaidia hadi hapo shughuli ya kuikabili TP Mazembe itakapokamilika," alisema Rage.

Alisema kuongezwa kwa makocha hao kunalenga kuimarisha maandalizi ya timu katika kila idara, ambapo kama uwezo ungekuwa unawaruhusu wangekuwa na kocha wa idara ya ulinzi, kiungo, makipa na ushambuliaji kama ilivyo timu za nchi zilizoendelea.

"Sisi ni umaskini wetu tu ndio unatufanya tuwe na kocha mmoja ama wawili, lakini kila idara inatakiwa kuwa na kocha wake ili kuhakikisha idara hizo zinafanya kazi yake ipasavyo, mfano mzuri wenzetu TP Mazembe wana makocha watano," alisema Rage.

Alieleza kuwa klabu hiyo pia ilikuwa na mpango wa kumleta kocha Talib Hillal kuongeza nguvu benchi la Ufundi, lakini suala hilo lilishindikana kutoka na kocha huyo kuwepo kwenye mafunzo ya siku 10 nchini Brazil.

Kocha Mkuu wa Simba Phiri ambaye alitarajiwa kurejea nchini jana, ameshindwa kufanya hivyo baada ya kuomba udhuru alitarajiwa kurudi nchini jana, lakini alioomba uongozi umpe muda hadi leo.

Rage amewaomba mashabiki wote kuweka utaifa mbele katika mchezo wa Simba na Mazembe utakaofanyika Uwanja wa Taifa, Dar es Salaam na kuwaunga mkono wawakilishi hao pekee katika michuano ya kimataifa katika ngazi ya klabu.

"Katika mchezo wetu wa Lubumbashi tulishangazwa na kile tulichokiona uwanjani, maana uwanja mzima isipokuwa Watanzania wachache waliokuwepo uwanjani walikuwa wakiishangilia Mazembe hata wale wapinzani wao wa jadi wa Lupopo FC waliwashangilia wao, hivyo tunawaomba Watanzania nasi tufanye hivyo tuweke tofauti zetu pembeni na kuonesha utaifa zaidi," alisema Rage.

Wakati huo huo, Klabu ya Simba imeliomba Shirikisho la soka Tanzania (TFF) kusogeza mchezo wake wa Ligi Kuu dhidi ya Kagera Sugar uliopangwa kufanyika Jumatatu ijayo .

Rage amesema kuwa wameomba hivyo kutokana na kuwa na wachezaji watano kwenye kikosi cha timu ya Taifa &#8216;Taifa Stars' ambacho kitaumana kesho na Jamhuri ya Afrika ya Kati, hivyo wanataka wawape nafasi wachezaji kupumzika kabla ya kujiunga na wenzao katika maandalizi ya kuikabili Mazembe na pia kuepuka kupata majeruhi.

Katika hatua nyingie, Rage amepinga madai ya baadhi ya wajumbe wa Mkutano Mkuu wa Chama cha Soka Mkoa wa Tabora(Tarefa) kwamba wamemuondoa kwenye chama hicho.

Rage amesema mkutano unaodaiwa kufanyika ulikuwa batili kwani ulihudhuriwa na wajumbe 16 kati ya 39 wanaopaswa kuhudhuria, hivyo maamuzi hayo hayatambuliki.

"Wanaotaka kuingia madarakani nawaambia wanachemsha wasubiri si sasa, wanafanya kinyume na katiba, hawajui walitendalo," alisema Rage, ambaye juzi Mkutano Mkuu wa Tarefa ulidai ulibariki kujiuzulu kwao.

"Sisi tulijuuzulu lakini hatukuandika barua, na tuligundua tumefanya makosa ndiyo maana tukaendelea na uongozi, sasa hawa wanaodai wamebariki na kutuondoa hawaijui katiba,"
alisema.

Shinyanga wataka kucheza Ligi Kuu

Imeandikwa na Raymond Mihayo, Shinyanga; Tarehe: 24th March 2011 @ 23:50 Imesomwa na watu: 96; Jumla ya maoni: 0








CHAMA cha Mapinduzi (CCM) Mkoa wa Shinyanga kimetoa mwito kwa Serikali ya Mkoa pamoja na wadau mbalimbali wa soka kuhakikisha wanafanya jitihada za makusudi ili kufanikisha kupata timu itakayoshiriki katika Michuano ya Ligi Kuu Tanzania Bara.

Mwito huo umetolewa na Mwenyekiti wa CCM Mkoa wa Shinyanga Khamis Mgeja katika Mkutano wake wa kuwashukuru wananchi wa Shinyanga kwa kushiriki kikamilifu katika uchaguzi mkuu uliopita na kukichagua chama hicho kuongoza nchi kwa kipindi cha miaka mitano ijayo.

Katika mkutano huo wa hadhara ulifanyika kwenye Kata ya Kambarage Mgeja alisema kuwa CCM Mkoa imetumia gharama kubwa katika kuukarabati Uwanja wa Kambarage na kuongeza kuwa itakuwa ni aibu kwa mkoa kukosa timu ya Ligu Kuu huku ukiwa na uwanja uliokidhi vigezo vya kutumika katika mashindano hayo.

Aliwaagiza Mkuu wa Mkoa kwa kushirikiana na wakuu wa wilaya za Mkoa wa Shinyanga kuwashirikisha wadau wote wa soka wa mkoa katika kuweka mikakati thabiti ya kuhakikisha kuwa mwakani Mkoa wa Shinyanga unakuwa na timu katika Ligi Kuu.

"Nashangaa Mkoa wa Shinyanga wenye rasilimali kubwa hapa nchini kama dhahabu, almasi, tumbaku na pamba na ikiwa na viongozi wapenda michezo lakini ikikosa timu ya Ligi Kuu," Alisema Mgeja katika mkutano huo.

Aidha aliendelea kusema kuwa jitihada hizo za kuhakikisha mkoa unapata timu zitakuwa zinaunga mkono jitihada za Rais Jakaya Kikwete katika kutekeleza ahadi ya kuendeleza michezo hapa nchini hali ambayo itasaidia hata kukuza vipaji vya vijana na hivyo kuwatumbukiza katika ajira ya michezo.

Mwenyekiti huyo katika jitihada za kuendeleza michezo katika Mkoa wa Shinyanga alimpongeza Mbunge wa Jimbo la Shinyanga Stephen Maselle kwa kutoa msaada wa mipira
na jezi kwa timu zote za jimbo lake zinazoshiriki katika michuano mbalimbali ya mkoa na zile zisizoshiriki na hivyo kuwaomba viongozi wengine wa Chama na Serikali kumuunga mkono katika jitihada hizo.

Wales v England, Euro 2012 Group G qualifier, Millennium Stadium, Saturday 26 March, 3pm

Fabio Capello offers Rio Ferdinand muddled apology for captaincy chaos

&#8226; 'Maybe I made a mistake,' admits England manager
&#8226; Capello says Ferdinand is to blame for no face-to-face meeting

• Dominic Fifield
• guardian.co.uk, Friday 25 March 2011 23.01 GMT <li class="history">Article history Fabio Capello has offered a muddled apology to Rio Ferdinand after John Terry was awarded the captaincy permanently. Photograph: Mike Egerton/Empics Fabio Capello has offered Rio Ferdinand a distinctly muddled public apology for his handling of John Terry's reappointment as England captain, but risked his attempts at reconciliation by suggesting the Manchester United defender was partly to blame for the pair having still not spoken face to face.
  Terry will lead England out against Wales on Saturday afternoon for the first time since the World Cup qualifier against Belarus in October 2009 as England seek to reinvigorate their Euro 2012 qualification campaign. Ferdinand, still absent with a calf complaint, has yet to speak in person to Capello since being stripped of the armband despite having twice been at games at Old Trafford attended by the Italian since the decision first emerged.
  Capello confirmed that he had expected to speak with the deposed captain to explain his reasoning in the directors' box at the Champions League tie against Marseille last week, only for Ferdinand to watch from Wayne Rooney's executive box instead. Asked whether the United defender had deserved an explanation delivered in person, Capello said: "Yes, that's the reason I tried to meet him. I tried. But it didn't happen. I waited for him in the directors' box just before the game started, but it didn't happen. Rio didn't come. Ask him [why not]."
  The England coach insisted it would have been "impossible" to meet anywhere other than in the directors' box and lounge and that he preferred not to speak with Ferdinand on the telephone to address the issue. "Maybe I made a mistake," he said. "I don't like to speak about the captaincy on the phone. I prefer to speak personally. But yes, it's possible sometimes to do everything better. For sure.
  "It will happen when I meet [Rio] in the future. I spoke with some people in the squad before I decided John Terry was the captain and all the players are happy. John Terry has always been a really important leader on the pitch and in the dressing room.
  "I respect the players. I respect all the people. As a club manager it's different &#8211; you can speak with the players every day &#8211; but I'm here to make decisions."
  The Italian, who will hand Darren Bent and Jack Wilshere their first competitive starts at the Millennium Stadium, was quick to insist he remains the right man to coach the national team after a little over three years and 34 matches at the helm. "I think I am. If my mind's not OK to drive this team, I go home. We have seven points from three games, and we've played some games very well. The only problem is our draw with Montenegro [last October]. But I am still enjoying the job."
  There was a message of support delivered, perhaps predictably, by Terry. "Fabio is the man in charge and he will be until after the European Championships," said the defender. "We firmly believe, and he firmly believes, that we can still improve &#8211; and must &#8211; leading up to that tournament. There's a determination from him. It's been there on the training pitch this week: he's lost his rag in training a couple of times, even in fairly light sessions where he's been cheesed off when we haven't done what he's asked. That hunger from him rubs off on the players.
  "We had quite a light session on Thursday, on corners and set plays with the lads attacking the ball, and they weren't doing it right. He just said: 'Right, we'll go in.' That's him all over. We can be doing the most simple thing, attacking corners and a bit of flair for the lads and he doesn't like it. He got frustrated. So were all like: 'Shit.' That's him. He wants everything to be right on the training pitch, and he covers every angle as well off the pitch."
  England need a resounding performance, and victory, against the team ranked 116th in the world on Saturday afternoon to ease the pressure on the manager and make up for the anaemic goalless draw against Montenegro which has left them second in Group G. Capello will turn back to Bent &#8211; who has played 30 minutes of competitive football for his country to date &#8211; having decided Andy Carroll is still to recover peak form since his two-month lay-off with a thigh complaint. "He is not at his top form. He's good, improving, but he's not the same player who played against France [in November]. Because he's big, he needs games."
  The striker remains an option from the bench, with Jack Wilshere to begin the game having impressed in Arsenal's Champions League elimination to Barcelona. "He plays like someone who is 28 or 29," said Capello. "He was fantastic against Barcelona. He was a leader on the pitch. It is not easy to find players like him, who play without fear in a stadium like the Camp Nou. I spoke with Arséne Wenger and he told me he had been surprised about how Jack Wilshere was doing in such a short space of time."
  Capello played Scott Parker alongside Wilshere at training in the Millennium Stadium on Friday night, but may yet choose to field the experienced Gareth Barry as the youngster's partner. Frank Lampard is expected to start on the bench. The England coach has to decide between Michael Dawson or Phil Jagielka as Terry's fellow centre-half.
  
  

Wales v England, Euro 2012 Group G qualifier, Millennium Stadium, Saturday 26 March, 3pm

Fabio Capello offers Rio Ferdinand muddled apology for captaincy chaos

• 'Maybe I made a mistake,' admits England manager
• Capello says Ferdinand is to blame for no face-to-face meeting

• Dominic Fifield
• guardian.co.uk, Friday 25 March 2011 23.01 GMT <li class="history">Article history Fabio Capello has offered a muddled apology to Rio Ferdinand after John Terry was awarded the captaincy permanently. Photograph: Mike Egerton/Empics Fabio Capello has offered Rio Ferdinand a distinctly muddled public apology for his handling of John Terry's reappointment as England captain, but risked his attempts at reconciliation by suggesting the Manchester United defender was partly to blame for the pair having still not spoken face to face.
  Terry will lead England out against Wales on Saturday afternoon for the first time since the World Cup qualifier against Belarus in October 2009 as England seek to reinvigorate their Euro 2012 qualification campaign. Ferdinand, still absent with a calf complaint, has yet to speak in person to Capello since being stripped of the armband despite having twice been at games at Old Trafford attended by the Italian since the decision first emerged.
  Capello confirmed that he had expected to speak with the deposed captain to explain his reasoning in the directors' box at the Champions League tie against Marseille last week, only for Ferdinand to watch from Wayne Rooney's executive box instead. Asked whether the United defender had deserved an explanation delivered in person, Capello said: "Yes, that's the reason I tried to meet him. I tried. But it didn't happen. I waited for him in the directors' box just before the game started, but it didn't happen. Rio didn't come. Ask him [why not]."
  The England coach insisted it would have been "impossible" to meet anywhere other than in the directors' box and lounge and that he preferred not to speak with Ferdinand on the telephone to address the issue. "Maybe I made a mistake," he said. "I don't like to speak about the captaincy on the phone. I prefer to speak personally. But yes, it's possible sometimes to do everything better. For sure.
  "It will happen when I meet [Rio] in the future. I spoke with some people in the squad before I decided John Terry was the captain and all the players are happy. John Terry has always been a really important leader on the pitch and in the dressing room.
  "I respect the players. I respect all the people. As a club manager it's different – you can speak with the players every day – but I'm here to make decisions."
  The Italian, who will hand Darren Bent and Jack Wilshere their first competitive starts at the Millennium Stadium, was quick to insist he remains the right man to coach the national team after a little over three years and 34 matches at the helm. "I think I am. If my mind's not OK to drive this team, I go home. We have seven points from three games, and we've played some games very well. The only problem is our draw with Montenegro [last October]. But I am still enjoying the job."
  There was a message of support delivered, perhaps predictably, by Terry. "Fabio is the man in charge and he will be until after the European Championships," said the defender. "We firmly believe, and he firmly believes, that we can still improve – and must – leading up to that tournament. There's a determination from him. It's been there on the training pitch this week: he's lost his rag in training a couple of times, even in fairly light sessions where he's been cheesed off when we haven't done what he's asked. That hunger from him rubs off on the players.
  "We had quite a light session on Thursday, on corners and set plays with the lads attacking the ball, and they weren't doing it right. He just said: 'Right, we'll go in.' That's him all over. We can be doing the most simple thing, attacking corners and a bit of flair for the lads and he doesn't like it. He got frustrated. So were all like: 'Shit.' That's him. He wants everything to be right on the training pitch, and he covers every angle as well off the pitch."
  England need a resounding performance, and victory, against the team ranked 116th in the world on Saturday afternoon to ease the pressure on the manager and make up for the anaemic goalless draw against Montenegro which has left them second in Group G. Capello will turn back to Bent – who has played 30 minutes of competitive football for his country to date – having decided Andy Carroll is still to recover peak form since his two-month lay-off with a thigh complaint. "He is not at his top form. He's good, improving, but he's not the same player who played against France [in November]. Because he's big, he needs games."
  The striker remains an option from the bench, with Jack Wilshere to begin the game having impressed in Arsenal's Champions League elimination to Barcelona. "He plays like someone who is 28 or 29," said Capello. "He was fantastic against Barcelona. He was a leader on the pitch. It is not easy to find players like him, who play without fear in a stadium like the Camp Nou. I spoke with Arséne Wenger and he told me he had been surprised about how Jack Wilshere was doing in such a short space of time."
  Capello played Scott Parker alongside Wilshere at training in the Millennium Stadium on Friday night, but may yet choose to field the experienced Gareth Barry as the youngster's partner. Frank Lampard is expected to start on the bench. The England coach has to decide between Michael Dawson or Phil Jagielka as Terry's fellow centre-half.

Mhazini kuongoza gofu Kanda ya Sita

Imeandikwa na Mwandishi Wetu; Tarehe: 24th March 2011 @ 23:45 Imesomwa na watu: 33; Jumla ya maoni: 0







MHAZINI wa Chama cha Gofu Tanzania (TGU) Gelase Rutachubirwa ataongoza timu ya Taifa ya gofu kwenye michuano ya Kanda ya Sita Afrika.

Michuano hiyo ya kila mwaka ya Kanda ya Sita Afrika imepangwa kuanza Aprili 11 hadi 15 kwenye viwanja vya Klabu ya Nyali Golf & Country, Mombasa, Kenya.

Ofisa Tawala wa TGU, Sophia Nyanjera amesema mjini Dar es Salaam, timu hiyo ambayo ipo chini ya kocha mkuu Mzimbabwe, Farayi Chitengwa inaundwa na wachezaji nane.

Aliwataja wachezaji hao kuwa ni Frank Roman, Abbas Adam kutoka klabu ya Gymkhana Moshi, Elisante Lembris, Nuru Mollel, Jimmy Mollel (Gymkhana Arusha), Godfrey Leverian (Gymkhana Morogoro) na wachezaji wawili wa Gymkhana Dar es Salaam, Iddi Mzaki na
Michael Makala.

Kikosi hicho kilichotajwa kina wachezaji ambao wana uzoefu na mashindano ya kimataifa. Nyanjera alisema mipango zaidi ya timu itawekwa wazi hapo baadaye.

Katika mashindano yaliyofanyika Gaborone, Botswana mwaka jana Tanzania ilishika nafasi ya 6 baada ya kukusanya pointi 10 na nusu kati ya nchi 12.

Wenyeji Kenya ndio mabingwa watetezi baada ya kunyakua taji mbele ya miamba Afrika Kusini wakiwa na pointi 21, Afrika Kusini wakishika nafasi ya pili pointi 19 na nusu na nafasi ya tatu kwenda Namibia wakiwa na pointi 16 na nusu.

Kocha Chitengwa alisema ana matumaini timu hiyo inaweza kufanya vizuri zaidi mwaka huu.

Wales v England, Euro 2012 Group G qualifier, Millennium Stadium, Saturday 26 March, 3pm

England look to Darren Bent to shed the air of predictability

The inclusion of the Aston Villa forward and Andy Carroll shows the England manager wants to overhaul the attack

• Comments (18)

• • Kevin McCarra
  • guardian.co.uk, Friday 25 March 2011 23.01 GMT <li class="history">Article history
  Fabio Capello is hoping Darren Bent can add a cutting edge to the England attack. Photograph: Tom Jenkins If England supporters have any reason at all to thank the national team it is for the haziness of the memories that remain from the past year. Anguish has been strictly rationed. The side's fate at the World Cup, for instance, did not lie in a ludicrous miss and even the terrible refereeing that denied Frank Lampard a goal against Germany was swamped by the memories of the victors' superiority.
  England's flaws did not come to a close with the end of last summer. Fabio Capello's side can certainly score on occasion, but there is always the prospect of sterility overtaking them once more. The unpredictability with which vacuous spells overcome the team also stokes supporters' anxieties even when England, sixth in the world rankings, are about to take on Wales, a team 100 places below them.
  That gap will appear to have shrunk if Capello's men have another of those days when impact is elusive. England, after all, were capable in September of running up a commendable 3-1 win in Switzerland, only to draw with Montenegro at Wembley in the next match. That occasion was goalless and while Zlatko Kranjcar's side are admirable in many regards, it did not excuse the hosts for being so vapid.
  As it is, Montenegro do not have another qualifier until June and England will top Group G if they beat Wales in the Euro 2012 qualifier at the Millennium Stadium. Capello's side would do so on goal difference. Their fault in front of the posts is an intermittent one, yet it occurs often enough to be agonising. England, for instance, could have left the 2010 World Cup sooner still had Matthew Upson not pulled off a fine challenge on Zlatko Dedic to preserve the 1-0 lead over Slovenia.
  The dullness of England means that Capello is never far from the next reappraisal. Darren Bent was rejected as a candidate for the World Cup when he was unobtrusive in the friendly with Japan at Wembley last June. Now the rehabilitation of the attacker may be so thorough as to see him in the starting line-up against Wales. After all, he did score the first of England's goals when Denmark were beaten last month.
  If Bent has high status now, the promotion comes because of an unavoidable reappraisal. The World Cup qualifiers were not really so very long ago, but there could still be pangs of nostalgia if people were shown highlights when Emile Heskey was the catalyst for explosive scoring by Wayne Rooney. Notions have altered since then. Should Bent be in the side he will be regarded as the finisher, with the Manchester United player cast as the provider.
  Roles should not be as rigid as all that, especially when a nation with high if unfulfilled ambitions is involved, but England must find a basic effectiveness in Cardiff. With Gareth Bale injured, Capello should be hopeful of pinning down Wales. The atmosphere in the stadium is not to be dismissed, but efficiency by the visitors could gradually dilute it.
  The manager himself does nothing to suggest that he considers England have decisive firepower to train on Gary Speed's Wales team. Capello did not come across yesterday as the great force in football we know from all his exploits in bygone days. "We created four chances to score and their keeper was good," the Italian said of the stalemate with Montenegro. "Sometimes you shoot a lot and don't score."
  It was the kind of dismal response given by a despondent journeyman of a manager. Capello is no such thing, but on a bad day even he can look drab. He is well aware that rejuvenation will only come with achievements by his squad. The desire to overhaul that attack, in particular, is expressed not solely in the recourse to Bent but also in the insistence on involving Andy Carroll.
  While the Liverpool signing is not over his thigh strain entirely, he could well be on the pitch at some stage against Wales. There are opportunities for attackers to have a leading role in England dramas, but they will still need prompters. That, indeed, is an underlying issue in the frustration of the team.
  It is not the most imaginative set of footballers. The visceral effect of Steven Gerrard is bound to dip with age and he is, in any case, unavailable for this match through injury. Lampard, another senior player, cannot be expected to erupt into attack quite so much and there is uncertainty about his selection for the starting line-up in Cardiff.
  Much as it will exasperate Capello, minds keep going back to Rooney. He has begun to find the net more regularly for United and also has the repertoire to undo Wales. Irrepressibility from him would be an old yet welcome story.
  
  

Wales v England, Euro 2012 Group G qualifier, Millennium Stadium, Saturday 26 March 3pm

Aaron Ramsey makes his case as the quiet captain for Wales

&#8226; Youngest ever captain defends credentials
&#8226; Ramsey expresses determination to silence doubters

• Stuart James
• guardian.co.uk, Friday 25 March 2011 20.52 GMT <li class="history">Article history The Wales captain, Aaron Ramsey, during a training session at the Millennium Stadium. Photograph: Darren Staples/Reuters Aaron Ramsey has defended his credentials to be the new Wales captain and spoke of his determination to prove that a lack of experience and quiet personality will be no barrier to his ability to lead his country.
  The Arsenal midfielder, who at 20 years and 90 days will become the youngest ever Wales captain when he lines up against England at the Millennium Stadium on Saturday, was a surprise choice to be named as Craig Bellamy's permanent successor.
  Gary Speed's decision has prompted criticism in some quarters, including from Kevin Ratcliffe, the former Wales captain. Ratcliffe said that he "thought there were better options within the squad" and also questioned whether Ramsey had the right attributes to be a captain. "I know his qualities as a player, but is he a leader?" said Ratcliffe, who won 59 caps for Wales. "For me, at the moment, he is very immature, I think, to be a captain."
  Ramsey, however, pointed to the experience he has gained from playing for Arsenal over the last three years as a reason to believe he is equipped to handle the role. He also suggested that he would inspire his team-mates with his ability on the pitch and hailed Cesc Fábregas, the Arsenal captain, as a "perfect example that you can just give players a lift by playing well" rather than bellowing orders.
  "I don't think I am too young [to be captain], I think I have played about 50 appearances for one of the biggest clubs in the world," said Ramsey. "I know I am not a screamer and a shouter, and I won't change the way I am. I'm not one that is the life and soul of the party, but I do speak up when there is something to say. And hopefully I can lead by example with the way I play. Obviously some people will disagree with [me being captain], but the manager has made his decision and hopefully I can prove it correct."
  Ramsey believes that he is a stronger person after coming back from the terrible injury he suffered at the Britannia Stadium 13 months ago, when he fractured his right tibia and fibula in a tackle with Stoke City's Ryan Shawcross. "This shows the highs and lows of football and how things can turn around," he said. "I broke my leg just over a year ago and it was a really low occasion for me &#8211; I had to be strong mentally to get through the injury. But now this is the best moment of my career so far. It's amazing how things can turn around."
  The former Cardiff trainee will be part of a Wales team that Speed hopes can use the England game as platform towards his ultimate goal of reaching the 2014 World Cup finals in Brazil. "There's a chance to make history but if we do beat England we've got to make sure that's not our greatest achievement," said the Wales manager. "We want our greatest achievement to be qualifying."
  Speed, who insisted "everything's fine" with Harry Redknapp after the Spurs manager claimed Gareth Bale picked up the hamstring injury that has ruled him out while away with Wales, will urge his players to seize the moment in a fixture they have not won since 1984. "When the players go out on that pitch they must make sure that they leave nothing on it when they come off as it is a great opportunity for them and a big occasion that might never happen again at home to England at the Millennium stadium," he said.
  "They have to take it by the scruff of the neck. If we get a positive result hopefully it can reignite the sport, because if we are to be successful we will need the fans to fill the Millennium Stadium every home game.
  "There have been occasions when we have played there in front of very few fans and that has been disheartening but hopefully this game can bring them back. I remember playing against Azerbaijan in front of 74,000 a few years ago and, with the greatest respect to Azerbaijan, it was our success, we were on a good run at the time, that drew the fans in."
  "This is our first real squad, we only had one day before the last game. It's been a fine balance of preparing for the future and for this game. We have been putting things in place to make us successful in the future, and, at the same time, focusing on a massive game tomorrow. We are playing in a way we want to be playing for the World Cup in 2014, so the structure will remain the same and we won't change the way we play. We have four or five days of good training but we are not trying to fill their heads with too much, and hopefully we can put things in place to go well tomorrow and secondly stand us in good stead for the future."