Lekanjobe Kubinika
JF-Expert Member
- Dec 6, 2006
- 3,020
- 577
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1) Two friends were discussing popular family
trends on sex, marriage, and family values.
Bill said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before
we got married, did you?'
Larry replied, 'I'm not sure, what was your
wife's maiden name?'
___________________________________________
2) A little boy went up to his father and
asked: 'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?'
The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have
got it from your mother, 'cause I still have mine.'
___________________________________________
3) 'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very
carefully,' the divorce Court
Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,'
'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband
said. 'And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.'
___________________________________________
4) A doctor examining a woman who had been
rushed to the Emergency Room took the husband
aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.'
'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.'
___________________________________________
5) An old man goes to the sorcerer to ask him
if he can remove a curse he has been living
with for the last 40 years.
The sorcerer says, 'Maybe, but you will have to
tell me the exact words that
were used to put the curse on you.'
The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.'
___________________________________________
6) Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.
'How was he killed?' asked one detective.
'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied.
'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?'
'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.'
___________________________________________
7) Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.'
Joe: 'Really?'
Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.'
__________________________________________
8) The graveside service just barely finished,
when there was a massive clap of thunder,
followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning,
accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance...
The little old widower looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she has reached there!'
1) Two friends were discussing popular family
trends on sex, marriage, and family values.
Bill said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before
we got married, did you?'
Larry replied, 'I'm not sure, what was your
wife's maiden name?'
___________________________________________
2) A little boy went up to his father and
asked: 'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?'
The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have
got it from your mother, 'cause I still have mine.'
___________________________________________
3) 'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very
carefully,' the divorce Court
Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,'
'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband
said. 'And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.'
___________________________________________
4) A doctor examining a woman who had been
rushed to the Emergency Room took the husband
aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.'
'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.'
___________________________________________
5) An old man goes to the sorcerer to ask him
if he can remove a curse he has been living
with for the last 40 years.
The sorcerer says, 'Maybe, but you will have to
tell me the exact words that
were used to put the curse on you.'
The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.'
___________________________________________
6) Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.
'How was he killed?' asked one detective.
'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied.
'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?'
'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.'
___________________________________________
7) Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.'
Joe: 'Really?'
Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.'
__________________________________________
8) The graveside service just barely finished,
when there was a massive clap of thunder,
followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning,
accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance...
The little old widower looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she has reached there!'
