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Ladies vs. Real Women

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by TANMO, Jun 21, 2009.

  1. TANMO

    TANMO JF-Expert Member

    Jun 21, 2009
    Joined: Apr 12, 2008
    Messages: 8,918
    Likes Received: 219
    Trophy Points: 160
    Ladies - If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking,
    drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an
    instant "fix-me-up."

    Real Women - If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too
    damn bad. Please recite with me The Real Women's motto:
    "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."

    Ladies - Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on
    your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

    Real Women - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You
    might still have the headache, but who the hell cares?

    Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar
    cone to prevent ice cream drips.

    Real Women - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on your ass on the couch, with your feet up anyway.

    Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with
    the potatoes.

    Real Women - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to
    worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs.

    Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use
    a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white
    powder mess on the bottom of the cake.

    Real Women - Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate the
    son of a bitch for you.

    Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking
    to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

    Real Women - Sara Lee frozen freakin pie directions do not include
    brushing egg whites over shit, so don't do it.

    Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex
    dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

    Real Women - Go ask the very HOT neighbour guy to do it. (oh yeah baby! )

    And finally the most important tip....
    Ladies - Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice
    cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

    Real Women - Leftover wine?? Hello!
  2. Madam Koku

    Madam Koku Senior Member

    Jun 21, 2009
    Joined: Feb 16, 2009
    Messages: 113
    Likes Received: 44
    Trophy Points: 45
    "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."
    ''Leftover wine?? Hello!''
    teh teh teeeh
  3. K

    Keil JF-Expert Member

    Jun 21, 2009
    Joined: Jul 2, 2007
    Messages: 2,214
    Likes Received: 5
    Trophy Points: 135
    Naona hiyo imekukuna sana, kulikoni?