hot za weekend

snochet · May 18, 2012

Wachaga na Pesa..

Mhindi,mpare na mchaga walienda kutoa msaada wa pesa kwa maskini.lakini waliweka masharti ya kupata huo msaada.na mambo yalikuwa hivi:-

mhindi>mimi ntachora duara kisha ntarusha pesa juu,zitakazoingia zenu,zitakazo toka nje zangu

mpare>mimi ntachora mstari kisha ntarusha pesa juu,zitakazo dondokea kwenye mstari zenu,zitakazo toka nje zangu

mchaga>mimi ntarusha pesa juu zitakazobaki juu zenu,zitakazorudi chini zangu!

snochet · May 18, 2012

Mke 1 alimpa mume wake radio aende nae chooni asiboreke kwa vile huwa anakaa muda mrefu,basi akaenda nae,alipotoka mke akamuuliza:eehee,mume wangu vp umeenjoy? mume:ah, wajinga hawa wameniekea wimbo wa taifa nimekunya huku nimesimama!

snochet · May 18, 2012

Mume akiwa ametoka kazini na uchovu huku akiwa mnyonge kufika nyumbani mke akamuuliza " vp kulikoni"??Mume akamuambi "Jengo la ofisi yetu limewaka moto na wafanyakazi wenzangu wote wamekufa"Mke asema Mungu wangu!Dah ilikuwaje hadi wewe ukanusurika?Mume akajibu"Nilikuwa nimeenda nje kununua sigara"Mke akasema kwa huzui" Nawaonea huruma sana Familia za wafiwa cjui zitaishi kwenye hali gani?Mume akajibu "watalipwa Bima kila familia milioni 20"Kusikia vile yule mke akasema kwa sauti ya juu""UNAONA SASA ,,,,MASIGARA YAKO YAMETUKOSESHA MAMILIONI ??""

snochet · May 18, 2012

Vodacom waanzisha M-Gomba kwa mkoa wa Arrusha ikishirikiana na safaricom ya kenya kutokana na biashara murua ya mirungi,,,

BX07YB153 Confirmed. You have received 2.5KG of MIRAA from 0722123456 on 18/05/12 at 06.10pm.Your New M-GOMBA balance is 3KG ALELE.!.Visit any MURUME nearby for withdrawal.happy handas!and a very gud Taxima!

snochet · May 18, 2012

kuna mvuta bangi mmoja alivuta kupindukia .akwa anarud nyumbani kwake akamkuta mkewe kalala na chupi aina ya bikini jamaa akaanza kucheka kwa sauti ya juu mpaka mkewe akaamka alipoulizwa ancheka sana alafu akasema hajawahi kuona ******... yamevaa kanda mbiiiii

snochet · May 18, 2012

Jamaa wawili walikuwa wanacheza karata porini.
Mara wakapita wakulima, wakasikia sauti inasema,

"Weka jembe chini. Wakaweka majembe yao chini.

"Weka kisu, wakaweka visu chini.. "
naomba kopa, wakaangaliana hawana kopa......."Weka mavi chini, ikabidi mmoja wao anye palepale.

Mara wakasikia "Kama huna mavi lamba, ikabidi yule ambaye hajanya alambe ya mwenzake.................... Mara wakackia " GAME OVER".

Wakashtuka kumbe kuna watu walkuwa wanacheza karata!

snochet · May 18, 2012

Siku moja mlevi kurudi na rafiki yake mgeni nyumbani kwake,na kuanza kumwelezea,Hii ni nyumba yangu na lile ni gari langu,wakaingia ndani wakakuta njemba na mke wake mlevi,bila wacwac mlevi akaendelea kueleza kile nikitanda changu, yule ni mke wangu na yule aliyelala naye ni MIMI!!!,Jaman teh!teh!teh!teh!

snochet · May 18, 2012

Jamaa alikuwa Amekaa ndani ya Club , kicheche akamsogelea na kumuuliza "Unataka ku-duu" Jamaa akamwambia "Ndio lakin unaweza kunipa kama Mke wangu ? " kicheche akamjbu "hapa ucpime mimi ni Nouma ntakupa Mbaka Mkeo Ucmkumbeke Tena !" Kwani huyo Mkeo anakupaje Jamaa akamjbu" Mke wangu ananpaga bure " kicheche akaondoka huku akimtukana "Utampata huyo huyo Nyooooo!

snochet · May 18, 2012

MWIZI na POLICE MAKABURINI,POLICE:alikuwa anamkimbiza mwizi makabulini,mwizi alipochoka akaamua kuvua nguo na kukaa Juu ya kaburi,POLICE alipofika akamkuta mwizi uchi Juu ya kaburi ikabidii amulize POLICE samahani hujamuona mwizi hapa? MWIZI Mie sijui maana nimezikwa jana,labda ulize kaburi lile pale lina mwezi sasa atakuwa anaju

Babkey · May 25, 2012

....hahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Mtanzanika · May 25, 2012

hahah!!!!ya mwizi makaburini na ya kicheche ni nouma!

Mitchell · May 25, 2012

you made my day

Safhat · May 25, 2012

Zte kali.

Shiwawa · May 25, 2012

snochet said:
Vodacom waanzisha M-Gomba kwa mkoa wa Arrusha ikishirikiana na safaricom ya kenya kutokana na biashara murua ya mirungi,,,

BX07YB153 Confirmed. You have received 2.5KG of MIRAA from 0722123456 on 18/05/12 at 06.10pm.Your New M-GOMBA balance is 3KG ALELE.!.Visit any MURUME nearby for withdrawal.happy handas!and a very gud Taxima!

Oya hii ndio imeshinda alie tunga anitafte nimpe zawadi

mkuyati og · May 28, 2012

hahaha, hiyo ya wakulima ni noma.

Dan Geoff P · May 29, 2012

Ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Shine · May 29, 2012

snochet said:
Mke 1 alimpa mume wake radio aende nae chooni asiboreke kwa vile huwa anakaa muda mrefu,basi akaenda nae,alipotoka mke akamuuliza:eehee,mume wangu vp umeenjoy? mume:ah, wajinga hawa wameniekea wimbo wa taifa nimekunya huku nimesimama!

Kwani taarabu inamnyima mtu kukaa!?

Shine · May 29, 2012

snochet said:
Mume akiwa ametoka kazini na uchovu huku akiwa mnyonge kufika nyumbani mke akamuuliza " vp kulikoni"??Mume akamuambi "Jengo la ofisi yetu limewaka moto na wafanyakazi wenzangu wote wamekufa"Mke asema Mungu wangu!Dah ilikuwaje hadi wewe ukanusurika?Mume akajibu"Nilikuwa nimeenda nje kununua sigara"Mke akasema kwa huzui" Nawaonea huruma sana Familia za wafiwa cjui zitaishi kwenye hali gani?Mume akajibu "watalipwa Bima kila familia milioni 20"Kusikia vile yule mke akasema kwa sauti ya juu""UNAONA SASA ,,,,MASIGARA YAKO YAMETUKOSESHA MAMILIONI ??""

Kufa kufaana hiyo teh teh!!

Shine · May 29, 2012

snochet said:
kuna mvuta bangi mmoja alivuta kupindukia .akwa anarud nyumbani kwake akamkuta mkewe kalala na chupi aina ya bikini jamaa akaanza kucheka kwa sauti ya juu mpaka mkewe akaamka alipoulizwa ancheka sana alafu akasema hajawahi kuona ******... yamevaa kanda mbiiiii

Teh teh kweli bangi mbaya!

Shine · May 29, 2012

snochet said:
Jamaa wawili walikuwa wanacheza karata porini.
Mara wakapita wakulima, wakasikia sauti inasema,

"Weka jembe chini. Wakaweka majembe yao chini.

"Weka kisu, wakaweka visu chini.. "
naomba kopa, wakaangaliana hawana kopa......."Weka mavi chini, ikabidi mmoja wao anye palepale.

Mara wakasikia "Kama huna mavi lamba, ikabidi yule ambaye hajanya alambe ya mwenzake.................... Mara wakackia " GAME OVER".

Wakashtuka kumbe kuna watu walkuwa wanacheza karata!

Ohooo! Hao wakulima watakuwa waTz ndo waoga namna hiyo ingekuwa wakenya yote hayo yasingetokea!

hot za weekend

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