nyumba kubwa
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 8, 2010
- 10,309
- 8,369
Mbu umenena sawa kwa kuongezea nyumba kubwa ni kuwa mnapoanza mapenzi wote huwa mna ile kuaminiana kuwa mwenzako anakupenda na yeye ndie kubwa kuliko wote! Unapopata mpenzi mpya binadamu tunaamini kuwa ni mbora kuliko a/walotangulia.............so trust inajijenga outomatically.......But anapokukosea kwa kosa ambalo pengine ulikwishawahitendewa zamani au hata kama ni kosa jipya (Lakini linaumiza) unaanza kuidoubt ile imani yako ya kuwa "huyu ni tofauti na wa/yule" hapo tunasema trust ime'shake' au kupotea.
Ili kuijenga upya inakubidi kwanza uane na kusamehe....kwa kuamini kuwa kosa lililofanyka ilikuwa bahati mbaya, au kulikuwa kuna explanation nyingine nje ya uwezo wa mkosaji. Ukisha samehe then kwa kuangalia mwenendo (marudio ya kosa hilo) kwa mwenzako unaanza kuijenga tena ile trust kuwa mwenzangu amebadilika so now nawezamtrust tena.
Ninajiuliza ......how do you rebuild the trust which has been destroyed because of "cheating" and je wanawake wanaokuta mume amecheat wakasamehe, do they trust them ever again? if not how do they live in a 'non-trust' marriage life?
Wanaume: Why its hard for you to forgive mwanamke aliyecheat (kabla ya kuuliza trust)?
Hapo kwenye bold; nikijibu kwa upande wangu; mimi nilishawahi kuwa cheated a year a go, maisha ninayoishi sasa ni yale ya kugongwa na nyoka, ukiona mjusi unashtuka. But yes, you can leave with someone without trusting him 100% na si kwa kupenda, narudia ni nje ya uwezo wangu.
But if you will ask me if I still love him, the answer is Yes. I love him than ever before. May be because sijiamini tena and nafikiri kuwa nikizidisha mapenzi basi hatarudia kosa. I love him and I can't bear the pain of sharing him with another woman.
Nachelea ku conclude kuwa trust once broken can never be amended 100%. Kwa mfano nikisikia mume wangu anacheat tena wala sitashtuka kama first incidence kwani najua what he is capable of since the first incidence.