Msaada jamani, what should I do?

I met a lady from an online chatroom and luckily she happened to live close by so we decided to meet up. well during our chats things turned a bit on the sexual side and she told me that she has a bf and i said am single but would like to have a sexmate. we continued to see each other and then started getting romantic, kissing and touching but we didnt have sex. it reached a point where i decided to try make an attenpt of sleeping with her but have to admit my skills do need polish and she thwarted my advances saying that am only after sex and that i don't love her which is true.

In truth I am not looking for a serious relationship so i was not going to tie myself up though i have to admit i did try lying to her that i love her which i admit was a move made more out of desperation.(had only had sex once before meeting her and a yr had passed). it was evident to me that this was going nowhere so i decided to just ignore her, no contact from my side. it is always her that initiates contact and even though i have told her that am just interested in sex she still initiates contact.

For the past one year we have not seen each other tho as i said she initiates contact. now i try to ignore her sms but for some reason i just find myself responding to them and i just cant stop thinking about her even tho i know she does not have the qualities i so desire in a gf nor is she willing to let me sleep with her since she does not wana be in a sexmate relationship. i asked her y she keeps initiating contact even tho she knows fully well that am more interested in sex with her and not anything else she says that its coz she likes me and just cnt forget abut me.

So now am confused, my brain tells me that forget she wont sleep with u and u dnt love her but i just cnt stop thinking about her and i do miss her. so what should i do in this situation?

Mmmh....nilichoelewa hapo ni Jaani, hivi Jaani si ni, au mimi ndio sijui lugha ya taifa la Tanzania?

Preta said:

mmmh....nilichoelewa hapo ni Jaani....hivi Jaani si ni....au mimi ndio sijui lugha ya taifa la Tanzania?

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Preta acha vituko mshauri mwenzio bana yuko desparate hajui afanyeje

Mr.Rocky said:

Preta acha vituko mshauri mwenzio bana yuko desparate hajui afanyeje

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nilikuwa nataka kuhakikisha kama nimeelewa vizuri neno JAANI...ili nije kijaani jaani.......he he he....

Preta said:

<font color="#800080"><font size="4"><span style="font-family: comic sans ms">mmmh....nilichoelewa hapo ni Jaani....hivi Jaani si ni....au mimi ndio sijui lugha ya taifa la Tanzania?.....</span></font></font>

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<br />
<br /> Ndiyo hivyo ulivyoelewa.

liverpoolfc said:

Ndiyo hivyo ulivyoelewa.

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kwamba ni......ooh no....JF haiwezi kuwa ndio hiyo bana.....

Preta said:

nilikuwa nataka kuhakikisha kama nimeelewa vizuri neno JAANI...ili nije kijaani jaani.......he he he....

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Hivyo hivyo ulivoelewa ila msaidie mwenzio anapata matatizo hajui afanyeje

Preta said:

kwamba ni......ooh no....JF haiwezi kuwa ndio hiyo bana.....

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Preta acha vituko elewa hivyo hivyo ulivyoelewa ila mwenzio anahitaji msaada wa kusaidiwa matatizo yako yuko so confused

msaada wa kufanyaje......shule za kata bana

ha ha dada Preta umehalibu post ya mwenzio, pls mpe ushauri

Kama hautajali KAJITUNDIKE! nasema hivi maana kila kitu kiko wazi na kwa kuwa akili yako imeamua kukutosa (bila kukupa the way forward)

i just cnt stop thinking about her and i do miss her

Mkuu love huwa inaanza kama hapo juu nilipobold, huwezi kujisikia hivo kama haujali wala kuwa na feelings zozote,sijui uliangalia quality gani,but nahisia kabisa umeanza kumpenda huyo msichana, kama huna mpenzi just give it a try,anza kudate nae mengine yatafata

Kwa wana jf wenzangu still bado sijaona tatizo la hii thread plz toeni ushauri, kuna thread zinaanzishwaga hapa na watu hazina mbele wala nyuma post hadi 300, acheni kujibu thread kwa kujuana au kubeza watu bila sababu, kuna thread kweli hata mtu akibeza unasema yeeees but hii, mwenzetu anahitaji comments zetu

You are trending on a dangerous path my brother....think twice....

mapenzi ya chat room,huwa yananitatanisha,maybe i'm wrong.ila naamini wanawake tuna fall kirahisi mno,kuliko wanaume.mzabzab,you never know,she may be the one for you.unaweza ukazunguuuuka,baadae ukarudi kwa huyo dada

As l get u,seriousl u already fall with her so northing more than to date her so if she wll be interested with u she gona open her heart for u coz on the other side she do lv u2 as the reason for her making contact wh u.then l thnk u get me budy an alwys try to listen ua heart!

Hawa wanapendana ila hawana hakika na wanachofanya wala wanachokitaka!!


Naamini si muda mrefu watakuwa wanaongea lugha nyingine....Haiwezekani ku-miss mtu usiyempenda na pia mwanamke anayempenda mwanamume lazima ajifanye kama hampendi ili asije kuumizwa!!

Nenda naye hivyo hivyo ila siku akili ikirudi kwenye mstari hutageuka nyuma...

Tatizo la wanaume wengi ni kupenda picha za kwenye media bila kujua kuwa hizo zipo kwa ajili ya matangazo. Ni wanawake wachache walio tayari kuolewa wenye hizo quality za magazeti ya super stars and TV adverts!!

sawa nimepata point zenu na yes it myt be true that i love this gal bila kujua mwenyewe lakini kuna ambo machache yananitatiza kuhusu kuanzisha ku-date huyu dada.

1) will she bliv me kuwa kweli nampenda wakati nilishamwambia kuwa ie sitaki relationship kwa sasa?
2) ata akinikubalia sii nitatumia muda mwingi wa relationship katika kuonyesha kweli nampenda ambalo litanifanya mie kama nipo kwenye kifungo
3) mie sijawahi kuwa katika relation wala kuwa na gf, je natakiwa fanya nini ili niweze kumnasa?

mzabzab said:

sawa nimepata point zenu na yes it myt be true that i love this gal bila kujua mwenyewe lakini kuna ambo machache yananitatiza kuhusu kuanzisha ku-date huyu dada.

1) will she bliv me kuwa kweli nampenda wakati nilishamwambia kuwa ie sitaki relationship kwa sasa?
2) ata akinikubalia sii nitatumia muda mwingi wa relationship katika kuonyesha kweli nampenda ambalo litanifanya mie kama nipo kwenye kifungo
3) mie sijawahi kuwa katika relation wala kuwa na gf, je natakiwa fanya nini ili niweze kumnasa?

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Huna sababu ya kutumia nguvu hata kidogo kwa sababu inaonekana mapenzi yenu ni organic...Fanya vitu vidogo vidogo tu kwake eg...jibu sms zake kwa hisia na pia wakati mwingine mtafute wewe. Pia kumbuka kumpelekea zawadi ndogo ndogo kila unapopata muda na penda sasa kuwa karibu naye...Acha kabisa kuongelea sex bali ongelea jinsi ambavyo moyo wako umebadilika ghafla na kugundua kuwa unampenda kuliko ulivyokuwa ukifikiri...Pia mwombe msamaha kwa hisia kwamba ulimuumiza ila mpe ahadi kwamba hutamuumiza tena na live ur words...Mambo ya sex yaliyokuwa yanakusumbua yatakua kirahisi sana kiasi kwamba mwenye hutaamini!!

Mzabzab... That is what is called falling in love... slowly and surely on your sides it seems.... Kitu ambacho hufanya watu wengi kukosa wapenzi ambao wanawafaa na a perfect fit katika maisha yao - ni vile viwango/qualities walizo jenga akilini mwao wa the type of lover/partner they want... Mara nyingi kila mmoja hua na tabia ya kua na a list of sifa kichwani ama rohohi kwake kua anataka mpenzi wa aina gani.... hio upelekea kwa watu wengine ku fall for the wrong people kila siku sababu tu anafuata vigezo (i.e usomi/uzuri/urembo/exposure/pesa/urefu/weupe n.k)... Such vigezo hupelekea kama mtu hajapata mtu wa viwango vyake (based katika speacial list yake) - akipata mtu wa kinyume na hio list; humtreat/mchukulia kama kipozeo... Which in some cases akifumbua macho na kuangalia afresh anakuta kua ndo perfect fit pamoja na kwamba hana hata moja katika his/her special list....