when the man is silent it is easy for the woman to imagine the worst
Women misinterpret a man's silence. Depending on how she feels that day, she may begin to imagine the worst- "He hates me, he doesn't love me, he is leaving me forever". This may trigger her deepest fear, which is " I am afraid that if he rejects me then I will never be loved. I don't deserve to be loved." - John Gray
Men argue for the right to be free while women argue for the right to be upset. Men want space while women want understanding." -John Gray
Hadi kununiana kwenye ndoa kulikoni? mie siwezi kukaa na dume ananuna maana sasa itakuwa kero tena, raha ya ndoa furaha daima.
Kuhusu mwanaume kukaa kimya....
Kuna wakati mimi nilikuwa na mawazo kiasi ya kwangu ambayo niliona siwesi ku"share" na wife kwasababu mitazamo yetu ingekuwa tofauti na nilihisi majibu atakayotoa kuhusu mawazo yangu yangeniudhi.
Hivyo nikaamua kukaa kimya na kuyatafakari mawazo hayo peke yangu. Ilinichukua siku kadhaa....kila nikirudi kazini...baada ya salamu mimi nilikaa kimya na kuwaza mpaka nikapitiwa na usingizi...
"...when the man feels appreciated for listening and he doesn't feel rejected for not sharing more, he will gradually open up"
mmmmhhhhh huu ung'eng'e kiboko! naomba tafasiri !huh, 🙁 wot d'u mean bro,
...is it gainsay? ...impertinent? ...misconceived? ...maybe, unveracious?
"when a woman's wave crashes is a time of emotional cleansing or emotional housecleaning.
One study revealed that a woman's self esteem generally rises and falls in a cycle between 21 and 35t days" -John Gray
Akufukuzae hakuambi toka. kuna kununa kwa hali nyingi .uchovu.wivu.njaa.kukosa pesa.kumjaribu anipenda.hiyo yote ni kununa.hayo ni majukumu ya mke kujua mumeo anapenda kipi amfanyie ili amfuhishe mumeo .sasa unapoolea tu.anza deko yakumuuliza wewe mume wangu kipi unapenda nakipi hupendi.na kwavile ni kipya kipya. atakwambi.hapo unajua leo kanuna nija wahi mlo.pesa mliwaze.uchovu masagi.mhakikishie ukitoka mpaka akuruhusu .ukikosa kabla hjasema omba msamaha .HAUTASIKIA UGOMVI .utusikia kwajirani. uzingatie ushauri huu.
Upo sahihi sheikh.
...kina baba, ...muwe na huruma kwa wake zenu/wapenzi wenu. Mnawapa wakati mgumu sana kina kina mama mkinuna bila kuwaambia 'kulikoni', au wewe unaonaje?
Mbu,
Mimi nilijua kuwa kukaa kimya na kununa ni tabia ambazo wanawake wanaambiwa kuwa wanazo.Sikujua kuwa hata wanaume wananuna!
Sasa mwanaume unaponuna, unataka mwanamke afanye nini? Nilifikiri mwanaume anapaswa kusema kama kuna kitu hakiendi sawa na siyo kununa.Akinuna na mwanamke akanuna halafu wanakaaje?
Kuna hadithi nilisikia kuwa mke na mume kwenye nyumba walikuwa hawasemezani.Wanapeana ujumbe kwa maandishi tu( bora na sasa kuna sms ambapo ikiingia angalau utasikia mlio na utajua kuna ujumbe).Ikafika siku bwana anasafiri.Akamwandikia mkewe kwenye karatasi " kesho uniamshe saa 11 ili niwahi ndege airport"..mke akaisoma, wakalala.Ilipofika saa 11, mke akamwandikia kinote
" amka,imefika saa 11" akakiweka juu ya meza akarudi kulala.Mume anashtuka ni saa 1 asubuhi! Akakurupuka na kuanza kumgombeza mkewe kwa makelele..." mbona hukuniambia ilipofika saa 11?" mke naye akajibu kwa kupayuka , "angalia mezani, nilikuandikia ujumbe ,Hukuusoma?"
Hayo ndiyo matokeo/hasara ya kununiana!
Hilo nalo neno