Ingekuwa wewe...

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

Nimeisoma hii mahali ikanifurahisha nikaona nishare nanyi wapendwa

Ingekuwa wewe ungefanyaje?

Mama Wawili bought a new handset and a new line.
She wanted to surprise her husband.

In the evening, the husband was in the sitting room watching TV while she was in the kitchen.
She called her husband from the kitchen "to surprise him".

The husband quickly picked up the phone, run to the bedroom without asking who was on the line (thinking that must be his girlfriend) he said:

Darling kata nitakupigia baadae kidogo, hili lijinga liko jikoni saa hizi likisikia litaanza ile mikelele yake, nalilia timing nitalitoka sasa hivi"

He then hanged up.

Ungekuwa wewe ungefanya nini kwa huyu mwanaume?

WomanOfSubstance · Apr 2, 2009

Surprises nyingine bwana!

Huyu mama inaelekea hakuwa anamwelewa vizuri mumewe.Angemwelewa angetafuta surprise nyingine na siyo hiyo.Unaweza ukafanya kitu kwa nia njema kabisa na baadae kikakupa simanzi ya ajabu.
Ingekuwa mimi hata sijui ningefanya nini kwa kweli!

I cant imagine mume wangu akisema "hili lijinga liko jikoni saa hizi likisikia litaanza ile mikelele yake"
Na huko jikoni si ajabu umejitoa kumpikia his favourite dish!

Zogwale · Apr 2, 2009

Hii ni kali. Ila ukiona mwenzi wako anapigiwa simu halafu anababaika kupokea au kuanza kutafuta njia za kutokea akaisikilize au anazima hataki kupoke anajidai eti watu wengine wasumbufu, then ujue kuna jambo.Kuwa makini hapo and investigative!!!

Ingekuwa mimi sibabaiki, ila tu nitajua namna ya ku tress communication zake zote, uwezo ninao. Then ningesubiri tu anipigie kama alivyoahidi then ndipo angezimia!!!!! Yaani wala nisingeonyesha kama kuna kitu kimetokea, yaani ndiyo kwanza ningejichekesha halafu nisubiri tu hiyo simu. Tena kila wakati ningekuwa nam beep akiwa distance na mimi ili apate uhuru wa kupiga ili tuongee haswa!!!!! Patakuwa patamu hapo. Du hapa nawafundisha akina mama/dada kukomaa vile!!!

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

WomenofSubstanc said:
Surprises nyingine bwana!
Huyu mama inaelekea hakuwa anamwelewa vizuri mumewe.Angemwelewa angetafuta surprise nyingine na siyo hiyo.Unaweza ukafanya kitu kwa nia njema kabisa na baadae kikakupa simanzi ya ajabu.
Ingekuwa mimi hata sijui ningefanya nini kwa kweli!
I cant imagine mume wangu akisema "hili lijinga liko jikoni saa hizi likisikia litaanza ile mikelele yake"
Na huko jikoni si ajabu umejitoa kumpikia his favourite dish!

Yaani WoS dada kwa mara ya kwanza nilicheka niliposoma hii ila baada ya kufikiria mara mbili ingenitokea mimi ningefanyaje nimekosa jibu ndo nikaona nilete hapa ppengine naweza saidiwa.

Yaani you cant believe all the names we are being called behind our backs!! Eti Tibaigana!!

Nahisi ningemwacha hadi atoke kama alivyoaga kisha akiwa garini ningempigia tena kisha nimsikie akibwabwaja then nimwambie it was me niliokupigia the 1st time; am your wife.

Then nakata. Sijui sasa atafanyaje

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

Maane said:
Hii ni kali. Ila ukiona mwenzi wako anapigiwa simu halafu anababaika kupokea au kuanza kutafuta njia za kutokea akaisikilize au anazima hataki kupoke anajidai eti watu wengine wasumbufu, then ujue kuna jambo.Kuwa makini hapo and investigative!!!

Ingekuwa mimi sibabaiki, ila tu nitajua namna ya ku tress communication zake zote, uwezo ninao. Then ningesubiri tu anipigie kama alivyoahidi then ndipo angezimia!!!!! Yaani wala nisingeonyesha kama kuna kitu kimetokea, yaani ndiyo kwanza ningejichekesha halafu nisubiri tu hiyo simu. Tena kila wakati ningekuwa nam beep akiwa distance na mimi ili apate uhuru wa kupiga ili tuongee haswa!!!!! Patakuwa patamu hapo. Du hapa nawafundisha akina mama/dada kukomaa vile!!!

Hahahaaaa
Asa kama ndo nshasikia vile hizo communication ambazo nataka kutress za nini sasa? Sina shida ya kumjua anayecheat naye kujua tu kuwa anacheat kunatosha sitapenda kujipa maumivu zaidi baada ya kumjua anayecheat naye

WomanOfSubstance · Apr 2, 2009

MwanajamiiOne said:
Yaani WoS dada kwa mara ya kwanza nilicheka niliposoma hii ila baada ya kufikiria mara mbili ingenitokea mimi ningefanyaje nimekosa jibu ndo nikaona nilete hapa ppengine naweza saidiwa.

Yaani you cant believe all the names we are being called behind our backs!! Eti Tibaigana!!

Nahisi ningemwacha hadi atoke kama alivyoaga kisha akiwa garini ningempigia tena kisha nimsikie akibwabwaja then nimwambie it was me niliokupigia the 1st time; am your wife.

Then nakata. Sijui sasa atafanyaje

Sista!

Usije kujipa ugonjwa wa moyo hata siku moja.Unajua kuna wakina mama wengi hata wanashindwa kuonyesha affection kwa waume zao au hata kujivunia waume zao kwa sababu kama hizi.Kuna misemo tunaiskia kwenye taarabu ati "wako akiwa kwako akitoka si wako", au ati mumeo ni kama dala dala linalobeba kila aina ya abiria a kupita njia zote - we lisubiri jioni lije li park!" Jamani.... hivi kwanini lakini imefikia huko?

Majina hata mie nimesikia ati siku hizi wake wanaitwa Tibaigana.. na huyu kaenda mbali zaidi kuita " hili jinga"....Hivi kuna majina gani mabaya yanayotumika kuwaita wanaume?

Mbu · Apr 2, 2009

WomenofSubstanc said:
...
Majina hata mie nimesikia ati siku hizi wake wanaitwa Tibaigana.. na huyu kaenda mbali zaidi kuita " hili jinga"....Hivi kuna majina gani mabaya yanayotumika kuwaita wanaume?[/COLOR]

...'buzi' Womenof Substance, au 'ATM' kwa lugha nyepesi 😀

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

WomenofSubstanc said:
Sista!
Usije kujipa ugonjwa wa moyo hata siku moja.Unajua kuna wakina mama wengi hata wanashindwa kuonyesha affection kwa waume zao au hata kujivunia waume zao kwa sababu kama hizi.Kuna misemo tunaiskia kwenye taarabu ati "wako akiwa kwako akitoka si wako", au ati mumeo ni kama dala dala linalobeba kila aina ya abiria a kupita njia zote - we lisubiri jioni lije li park!" Jamani.... hivi kwanini lakini imefikia huko?
Majina hata mie nimesikia ati siku hizi wake wanaitwa Tibaigana.. na huyu kaenda mbali zaidi kuita " hili jinga"....Hivi kuna majina gani mabaya yanayotumika kuwaita wanaume?

Sisy inakatisha sana tamaa. Na ukiyazingatia haya na kuyaacha yatawale moyo wako unawezajikuta unamwacha mumeo aende kazini mchafu hata underwear usimpe safi maana si unajua kuwa unampendezesha kumbe anapeleka kwa wenzako au unamhudumia afu yeye anakuita majina ya ajabu yaani ... eti hili lijinga wallah inauma.

Haya maneno ya kashfa dada yangu ya muwe daladala subiri jioni lije kupark e.t.c yanatokana na wanaume wenyewe na tabia zao za kupenda kila mahala kwa sababu mtu ukiwa na mume anayejiheshimu kabisa asiye na vimeo kila kono sidhani kama mtu awezakwambia mume ni wako akiwa kwako!! Inaonyesha kabisa kuwa huyo mume ndie anayetoa hiyo nguvu ya mke kujibiwa hivyo au yeye kupachikwa majina ya daladala... aibu

BelindaJacob · Apr 2, 2009

Mbu said:
...'buzi' Womenof Substance, au 'ATM' kwa lugha nyepesi 😀

Pia ni Mdau au Mwekezaji.

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

Mbu said:
...'buzi' Womenof Substance, au 'ATM' kwa lugha nyepesi 😀

Ah Mbu haya ni majina ambayo wanaitwa na hao virukanjia wa pembeni huwezikuta mke anamwita mumewe buzi au ATM.

Nadhani WoS alitaka majina ambayo wake huwaita waume zao (wa ndoa) kama wao wanavyotuita sie Tibaigana.

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

BelindaJacob said:
Pia ni Mdau au Mwekezaji.

Ah Belinda kumbe bamsap nawezamwita Mwekezafi au Mdau...... sikuwa nalijua hili.

BelindaJacob · Apr 2, 2009

MwanajamiiOne said:
Nimeisoma hii mahali ikanifurahisha nikaona nishare nanyi wapendwa

Ingekuwa wewe ungefanyaje?

Mama Wawili bought a new handset and a new line.
She wanted to surprise her husband.

In the evening, the husband was in the sitting room watching TV while she was in the kitchen.
She called her husband from the kitchen "to surprise him".

The husband quickly picked up the phone, run to the bedroom without asking who was on the line (thinking that must be his girlfriend) he said:

Darling kata nitakupigia baadae kidogo, hili lijinga liko jikoni saa hizi likisikia litaanza ile mikelele yake, nalilia timing nitalitoka sasa hivi"

He then hanged up.

Ungekuwa wewe ungefanya nini kwa huyu mwanaume?

Hapa lazima kwanza mwanamama uchanganyikiwe kwa jibu alilotoa husband. Na solution ya hili itategemea na jazba itakayokuwa imeniandama tena ya hali ya juu.

Labda nimwambe ukweli kuwa ni mimi mkeo nilikuwa najaribu kukupigia au ni nimwache atoke halafu nimpigie simu nimwambie ni mimi husband nilikuwa nakupigia au akitoka nimfungie kabisa alale huko nje maana tayari una hakika anajivinjari nje ya ndoa halafu ananidharau eti lijinga mie..

Anyway,tukio kama hili likikutokea ndo utajua jinsi ya kureact. Huwezi jua naweza kuishia kulia tu na kukaa kimya, ha ha..

WomanOfSubstance · Apr 2, 2009

BelindaJacob said:
Pia ni Mdau au Mwekezaji.

Wapendwa.

Mdau na Mwekezaji angalau yana staha kuliko " hili jinga" he he he.Buzi na ATM nadhani yanatumika kwa wote wale ambao wanatolewa upepo na wale opportunists wasiokuwa na mapenzi ya kweli.- Najua wapo pia wanawake wanaotolewa upepo na wanaume pia.

Ila jamani ndoa ni ndoano.Ukidhani umefika safari bado mbiiichi! Ukidhani umepata unaweza kukuta umepatikana.Ukishikwa labda ushikamane vema - kwa maana kama wewe mume wako au mpenzi wako ni mtu mwema basi muenzi na kumpenda kwa dhati.

BelindaJacob · Apr 2, 2009

MwanajamiiOne said:
Ah Belinda kumbe bamsap nawezamwita Mwekezafi au Mdau...... sikuwa nalijua hili.

Mwanajamii1

Not for Husband ila wengineo kama alivyotaja mbu wale buzi types..
Mume ni Soulmate,Dearest one, The one and Only, Chocolate Man, Mon mari na mengine romantic. Maana huyu ndo for life,mnashare maisha na kujenga family..

BelindaJacob · Apr 2, 2009

Mwanajamii1 na WOS!
Kuna uncle wangu fulani kaoa,ila ana mishemishe zake lakini humwita mkewe 'mheshimiwa' au 'Her Majesty'. Mfano akipiga simu na fulani fulani wake anaweza kumwambia ' dear leo sitaweza kukuona naenda mahali na mheshimiwa'...

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

WomenofSubstanc said:
Wapendwa,
Mdau na Mwekezaji angalau yana staha kuliko " hili jinga" he he he.Buzi na ATM nadhani yanatumika kwa wote wale ambao wanatolewa upepo na wale opportunists wasiokuwa na mapenzi ya kweli.- Najua wapo pia wanawake wanaotolewa upepo na wanaume pia.
Ila jamani ndoa ni ndoano.Ukidhani umefika safari bado mbiiichi! Ukidhani umepata unaweza kukuta umepatikana.Ukishikwa labda ushikamane vema - kwa maana kama wewe mume wako au mpenzi wako ni mtu mwema basi muenzi na kumpenda kwa dhati.

Ah Dada mie naomba nisiseme maana nikikifungua hiki kifuniko cha moyo wangu mh. Cha muhimu ni kama ulivyosema ukimpata mwena na mwenye mapenzi ya kweli mshikilie na usimnyanyase wengine tunawatafuta hatuwapati.

WomanOfSubstance · Apr 2, 2009

BelindaJacob said:
Mwanajamii1 na WOS!
Kuna uncle wangu fulani kaoa,ila ana mishemishe zake lakini humwita mkewe 'mheshimiwa' au 'Her Majesty'. Mfano akipiga simu na fulani fulani wake anaweza kumwambia ' dear leo sitaweza kukuona naenda mahali na mheshimiwa'...

BJ,
Huyu uncle ni mtu kweli.Japokuwa ana harakati..hajasahau nafasi ya mke na heshima yake.

MwanajamiiOne · Apr 2, 2009

BelindaJacob said:
Mwanajamii1

Not for Husband ila wengineo kama alivyotaja mbu wale buzi types..
Mume ni Soulmate,Dearest one, The one and Only, Chocolate Man, Mon mari na mengine romantic. Maana huyu ndo for life,mnashare maisha na kujenga family..

Nimekupata Belinda ila huoni sie tunawaita majina matamu tukiwa na wenzetu ila wao wanatuita ya ajabu?

Ila kwa wale wenye vidumu nasikia huwezakumwita mumewe hili bwege au **** sina hakika kama ni kweli

Fidel80 · Apr 2, 2009

Dah hilo jambo ngoja tuwaachie wenyewe wabeijing aka mewata....

WomanOfSubstance · Apr 2, 2009

Fidel80,
Tupe na wewe upande wa pili wa shilingi....

Ingekuwa wewe...

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