Dear alcohol


The Finest

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[FONT=&quot]Dear Alcohol,

I thought I'd take a minute to discuss some troubling factors with you. First and foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. Your many sides and dimensions are mind-boggling (different than beer goggling, which I'll touch upon shortly.) Yes, my friend, you always seem to be there when needed: the perfect post-work cocktail, a beer with the game...and you're even around in the holidays: Hidden inside chocolates you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. Yet lately, I've been wondering about your intentions.

You see, I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, but I feel that your influence has led to unwise consequences, briefed below for your review:

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]1. Phone calls[/FONT][FONT=&quot]: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity occurs after 3 am. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]2. Eating[/FONT][FONT=&quot]: Now, you know I love a good meal and, though cooking is far from my specialty, why you suggested that I eat a kebab with chili sauce coupled with a pot noodle and some stale crisps (washed down with chocolate nesquik and topped off with a Kit Kat) is beyond me. Eclectic eater I am, but I think you went a bit too far this time.

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]3. Clumsiness[/FONT][FONT=&quot]: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me I need to do yoga more to increase my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down the stairs. Completely unnecessary, and the black and blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]
4. Pictures[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]: This is a blessing in disguise, as it can often clarify the last point below, but the following costumes are heretofore banned from being placed on my head in public: Indian Wigs, Sombreros, Bows, Ties, Boxes, upside-down cups, inflatable balloon animals, traffic cones, and bras.

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]5. Beer Goggles[/FONT][FONT=&quot]: If I think I may know him/her from somewhere, I most likely do not. PLEASE do not request that I go over and see if in fact, I do actually know that person. This is similar to the old "Hey, you're in my class" syndrome circa 1996 at SU, and should heretofore be rendered illegal. Coupled with this is the phrase "Let's shag." While I may be thinking this, please reinstate the brain-to-mouth block that would keep this thought from being a statement, especially in public.

Further, the subsequent hangovers have GOT to stop. Now, I know a little penance for our previous evenings' debauchery may be in order, but the 2pm Hangover Immobility is completely unacceptable. I ask that if the proper steps are proactively taken on my part (i.e. water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to bed/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be quite minimal and no way interfere with my daily Saturday or Sunday (or any day, for that matter) activities. Come on now, it's only fair-you do your part, I'll do mine.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our relationship for some years now, and want to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when we just don't know what to do with the extra money in our pockets. In order to continue this relationship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above and address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday at 5pm (pre happy hour) on your possible solutions and hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Sincerely,

Your Biggest Fan.
[/FONT]



COPY TO:
KAIZER, ROYA ROY, TEAMO, ASPRIN, KIMEY, GENERATION Y, BIGIRITA, FIDEL 80, ACID
 
ENZO

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kingereza kinaleta uvivu kusoma.
 
afrodenzi

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@ The Finest

YouTube - Savage - Moonshine ft. Akon

hey i thought this song will go well with ur thread .........took me same time to understand what they were singing about but i finally did and i like it ... hope u will enjoy it too:smile-big::smile-big:
 
The Finest

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TIMING

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Finest... pombe is the best innovation a man has ever made... actually it was blessed by jesus and is used everyday... if this was a religion, it would come next to money

gotta get back to work....
 
The Finest

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Finest... pombe is the best innovation a man has ever made... actually it was blessed by jesus and is used everyday... if this was a religion, it would come next to money

gotta get back to work....
Cousin what happened kwa maudhurio yako kwenye mikutano ya chama chetu
 
Fidel80

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Fidel80

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Kwa wapenda mabadiliko kipindi hiki Pombe inawasaidia sana kuwaliwaza na idadi ya watu Bar na grosari imezidi kuongezeka tunajiliwaza na kuchakachuliwa huku kweupeeeeeeeee
 
WiseLady

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It plays all gud friendship, and the worse one!just two at ago, but one encounter much of the other.
 
The Finest

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It plays all gud friendship, and the worse one!just two at ago, but one encounter much of the other.
One bottle of Red Label for you on the house
 
The Finest

The Finest

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Kwa wapenda mabadiliko kipindi hiki Pombe inawasaidia sana kuwaliwaza na idadi ya watu Bar na grosari imezidi kuongezeka tunajiliwaza na kuchakachuliwa huku kweupeeeeeeeee
Utapigwa faini kwa kukosa kuhudhuria vikao muhimu
 
Bigirita

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Bigirita

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It plays all gud friendship, and the worse one!just two at ago, but one encounter much of the other.
the best part is ....... let's shag. straight no longolongo!
 
Bigirita

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Bigirita

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Will prefer santi anna,since we are all saints
why not st. big? it is a cocktail you will love. a combination of big and mama big. how about that?
 
Teamo

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be back....!naenda kuchukua dikshenare tanganyika laibrare hapo.....
 
The Finest

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why not st. Big? It is a cocktail you will love. A combination of big and mama big. How about that?
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha nimecheka mpaka basi nyie watu wa jf doh!!! Doh!!! Doh!!!
 
TIMING

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TIMING

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Cousin what happened kwa maudhurio yako kwenye mikutano ya chama chetu
Mkuu, Slaa kanituma nchi za ukanda wa africa kuasmbaza habri njema kwamba amekamata wezi wa vijikaratasi vya kura

nikipata nauli ntarudi nchini....

tatizo huku ni hili lilebo jeusi kwenye kidole changu cha mwisho, halifutiki kama ndonya
 
Bigirita

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Bigirita

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Mkuu, Slaa kanituma nchi za ukanda wa africa kuasmbaza habri njema kwamba amekamata wezi wa vijikaratasi vya kura

nikipata nauli ntarudi nchini....

tatizo huku ni hili lilebo jeusi kwenye kidole changu cha mwisho, halifutiki kama ndonya
ukirudi utakuta una yohana watembezi wanne, na utalazimika kuwamaliza katika kikao kimoja.
 
The Finest

The Finest

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The Finest

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Mkuu, Slaa kanituma nchi za ukanda wa africa kuasmbaza habri njema kwamba amekamata wezi wa vijikaratasi vya kura

nikipata nauli ntarudi nchini....

tatizo huku ni hili lilebo jeusi kwenye kidole changu cha mwisho, halifutiki kama ndonya
HA HA HA HA HA aiseee mimi nimefua nguo mara nne bado haijatoka na sasa hivi ndio inaelekea kuishia
 

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