I feel like I want to die

[point of no return]

Habari wakuu wa JF,

Thank you for your advice all of you. I know no one knows me but only those who I gave them my number, I'm not a liar as some people said, I'm not a cowered as other saying, I didn't write here yesterday so that people can have mercy with me but I wrote here because of the situation and I just wanted people to know how I feel but even now I don't know why I wrote here like that.

I asked myself today in the morning why I wrote here in jamii forum but trust me. I have change my mind and I get something new in jamii forum, I didn't have a close person who I can tell what I feel. Unajua Kuna watu walikuja inbox even wakanishauri kwa maandiko ya biblia and quraan na nikapata nguvu mpya na ujasiri mpya. Kumbe now I see that I'm not the only person who get problems and there is a lot of people who have more than this.

Kuna watu wanasema why namiliki smartphone alafu nalalammika Nina shida... Guys as I told you yesterday I was so upset to write in here but my smart some one gave me for just small amount cas I was doing my last job somewhere and I had some small money so I decided to buy it because I wanted to know and get more through internet and maybe I can get a job through some blogs and other companies so to have smartphone inarahisisha and that's why kuwa na smartphne is not like to have fun with it no but for a good reason.

Nimepata nguvu mpya na asante kwa wote mliocomment sina cha kuongeza but najilaumu Tu na kuwaza what if ningekufa Jana? But thanx to God I'm alive. Ngoja nipambane upya. Guys you don't know nguvu ya stress. Stress znaweza kukuganya ukafanya jambo la ajabu on the spot.

Kwa wale waliosema PIA kila mtu anamatatizo niache kujiliza Ni hivi sio wote tunapitia problems zinazofanana.. Inategemea ugumu gani unaopitia au watu gani ealokuzunguka. Historia pia inachangia so don't insult me because sijasema Ni yapi niliopitia ila jua ni makubwa na even nikimuadithia yoyote anaweza asiamini if Ni Mimi ndo naongea but nili survive so usiniauumu wala kuniona nadanganya.

Why nidanganye? Ili iweje? Kwa faida ya nani? Au Ni sababu ipi inifanye nidangganye? I'm not crazy and I'm not chizi... Thanx to God I'm alive.

NB: just if you can offer me any job again tashikuru zaidi hata mawazo mapya PIA tashkuru.. Na ngoja nifatilie huko na huko nione tapata wapi kazi.

Thank you.

 

[The Boss]

Naona toka Magufuli aingie idadi ya wanaotka kujiua inaongezeka kwa kasi
wewe wa pili leo umetuletea thread unajiua...

 

[kipozi]

Embu acha izo usiwaze kufa saiz pambana maisha ni kupambana mpaka kielewe amka tembea tafta kaz yoyote ufanye na ufanye kwa bidii sana utatoka tu pole kwa yanayokusibu

 

[graxana]

Hakuna kuchoka pambana pambana,, huko unapokimbilia ndo maumivu zaid,, ni moto milele hauend kupumzika,, mimi kwa umri ni mdogo but napambana vibaya yan,, kunakijikaz naweza kukuunganisha 0688419041,, uwe na nia uwezo wa kufanya,, zaidi ya yote jiweke busy kanisan au msikitin fanya kazi flani wakati ukiendelea kutafuta kazi,, don't be idle,, unaweza hata kulala huko,, stand up jitie nguvu tupambane never give up coz nilishaw pitia hiyo hali kabisa, na kutaka kujiua,, but nikasema nitapambana

 

[Smart911]

Umejitangazia vingi...

 

[Jajojo]

Habari wakuu wa jf..
Nilikuja na thread hapa nkawa naomba advice na msaada kwa yoyote ataeweza... People came and gave me some advice... Japo until now sijapata kazi yoyote... But I was trying my best.. As I said my education level is form 6..

Leo nilienda dukani kununua sumu... My intation ilikua kujiua but sijafanikiwa kufanya hivo sababu nilipofika ninapoishi nikajukuta sina hiyo sumu and until now sijui niliipoteza vipi.. Nikaenda tena dukani but I realize that sikuw na pesa tena.. Nikarudi room na nikatafta vidonge nikavipata (panador + mseto na vidnge vingne ambavyo sjui vinaitwaje) nikanywa vyote kama ishirini hivi... But I wonder God... Now nipo naandika hii thread again.. Sijafa wala sijaumwa tumbo... Why me God? Everything ninavopitia na shida zote hizi why unataka niishi?
wakuu nimejitahidi kufanya ninavoweza niweze kuishi na sasa nilidhani nimepata mwanga cas people came to my thread and advised me na nkaanza kufanyia kazi ushauri WA baadhi ya watu but kabla sijamaliza wala sijafanikiwa lingine limetikea tena...Nimefukuzwa nilipokua nakaa (nilipokuwa nimehifadhiwa) nimefkuzwa kama mbwa and I didn't deserve that.. God why me? Am I looks like bad guy? Cha ajabu sijajua sababu za kufkuzwa like that.. Japo I feel like is because hawakupendi nikae pale tangu mwanzo ILA nililazimisha Tu cas sikua na jinsi ILA kusubiri hadi nipate njia.. Guys nakufa mwenzenu... Mi bado mdogo Sana kupitia nnayopitia... Nimepitia mengi magumu ya kudhatirishwa but I can't take it anymore.. Heri walio na wazazi ambao wanawatunza.. Namkumbuka my dad... Alinipenda na kunijari but now hakuna tena upendo kwangu... Labda mi Ni shetani nimekua... Mungu niache nipumzike na Mimi since 2007 nikiwa mdogo nmedharirishwa Sana baada ya mzee kufariki but until now nadharirika... Kazi sipati, hakuna hata anaenijari mpaka wanatokea anonymous WA jf kuja kunionea huruma... Nimechoka Mungu wangu. Nimechoka jamani... Nguvu zangu zmefika mwisho... Sijui niombe ushauri au niombe msaada maana nimedharirishwa Sana jamani.. Hapa nimejishkiza kwa mtu ambae amenpa 5 days niwe nimeondka cas ndgu zake wanakuja hapa nimefika mwisho WA mawazo yangu... Sina la kuwaza tena I can't take to be kijana WA mtaani na kuja kuingia kwenye tabia za ajabu but kufa Ni vema zaidi... Simwambii maama angu chochote... Najua hawezi kunitafuta ILA bora asikie Tu nimekufa... Msinione chizi kuandka hivi but nimefika mwisho... Mawazo yangu yameishia hapa.. I will find even sumu again tomorrow and I will kill myself... Nimedharirika na cha ajabu mtu nilimkuta somewhere Jana nikamwambia shida yangu but he told me niwe shoga... Just gay... Nijiuze... Kanijubu kwa dharau na kebehi na kusema if naweza kujiuza soko lipo... Guys I am a boy just only 21 years tena natimiza hyo 21 mwez WA 6 tareh 9...nimedharirishwa jamani Nina nini Mimi lakini... Nmeondoka kwa hasira and neno lake limenrudia tena Leo that's why nikatafta sumu na nmekunywa vidonge but sijafa why my Lord?
Nakufa nwenzenu nimeshindwa

Kujiuwa sio mwisho wa maisha in mwanzo wa maisha ya jehanamu au peponi, kabla ya kujiuwa chagua unataka kwenda wapi?...... Kujiua ni uamuzi wako sio mapenzi ya Mungu au shetani. Ni wewe unaamua hivyo. Nakushauri umkaribishe Mungu moyoni mwako na umwamini kwa moyo wako wote, atakufanyia miujiza na maajabu ya kukufanya uishi maisha mema yenye amani. Yohana 3:16.

 

[GIUSEPPE]

I can not say a thing, i can not help, im just crying, please come back and say this is just a story, please !!!

 

[vevenononombo]

Waliozaliwa mwezi huo huwa ni majasir

 

[upendodaima]

Ukiweka mbele fikra za kujiua ipo siku utajiua tu.

Kwa taarifa yako kuna watu wana shida kiasi kwamba hata 1KB of data hawana achilia mbali smartphone na hela ya kununulia sumu.

 

[Mtemikwila]

Nakuhakikishia kua tukiweka mapito yetu humu jf utajikuta wewe upo ktk hali nzuri kuliko watu wengine,uanaume ni vita usione watu wakila bata. Pambana kujiua waachie ndezi.

 

[Nkundwe Sr]

Duh! Usifanye hivyo maisha magumu so kwako tu tena unaweza ukakuta wewe unamaisha mazuri

 

[MNANSO]

usijiue mkuu.kuna vingi vya kufanya.usilazimishe kupata ajira nzuri wewe beba hata zege kule tegeta kuna building companies nyingi na site za kutengeneza matofali.huwezi kukosa cha kufanya surely.utapata hela ya kula na kusave kidogo.please usichague kazi.Bwana Yesu akutane na haja za moyo wako

 

[MNANSO]

kwa mtoto wa kiume mbona vibarua vingi? hembu weka elimu pembeni.huna cheti chochote mpaka sasa hivyo itakubidi uanze na kazi ngumu za vibarua mpaka Mungu atakapokuinua mwenyewe

 

[jose mjasiriamali]

HAKUNA JARIBU AMBALO MUNGU HUMPATIA MWANADAMU ASIWEKE MLANGO WA KUTOKEA,SIMAMA,JITIE NGUVU, SONGA MBELE, USIISHIE KULALAMIKA WALA KUJIUA, WAPO WALOPITIA MAGUMU KULIKO YAKO LAKINI HAWAKATI TAMAA, MUNGU ANA MAKUSUDI NA KILA MTU ALIYEMUUMBA, USIFIKIRI NI KWA NINI ULIPOTEZA SUMU ULONUNUA ILI UJIUE, AU KWANINI HUKUFA BAADA YA KUMEZA VIDONGE, UTAKUFA BAADA YA KUMALIZA KAZI ILIYOKULETA DUNIANI. UTAENDELEA KUUMIA SANA KAMA BADO UTAKUWA UNA MAWAZO YA KUKATA TAMAA.HIYO FORM SIX YAKO IWEKE PEMBENI MAANA WAPO WENGI HATA HIYO FORM SIX HAWAIJUI NA MAISHA YAO NI MAZURI KABISA, ILA VYOTE HIVYO HUJA BAADA YA JITIHADA ZA KUTOSHA. USIWAANGALIE NDUGU MAANA NAO WANA YAO.
MWENYEZI MUNGU AKUTIE NGUVU KATIKA YOTE UNAYOPITIA, NA NAAMINI ATAONESHA NJIA PALE AMBAPO KWA MACHO YA KIBINAADAMU HATUIONI NJIA.

 

[MNANSO]

halafu unashida ya kiroho.mpaka umefikia hatua ya kusema kujiua ujue kuna roho mbaya inakunyemelea.natamani ungepata huduma na ya kiroho ili hizo roho zilizokuvaa zitolewe.anyway Bwana akusaidie

 

[Preta]

Ukiweka mbele fikra za kujiua ipo siku utajiua tu.

Kwa taarifa yako kuna watu wana shida kiasi kwamba hata 1KB of data hawana achilia mbali smartphone na hela ya kununulia sumu.

Pamoja sana mkuu.....
Hiyo simu anayotumia ni mtaji tosha.......

 

[mikatabafeki]

Usisahau kuwaachiua nduguzo chochote cha kuanzishia gharama za mazishi

 

[Dr Lizzy]

Acha kuzingua wewe.

Tatizo vijana wa siku hizi wanapenda maisha rahisi sana ndio maana unalia lia mtandaoni badala ya kuangalia nini unaweza ukafanya kusogeza maisha mbele. Unalalamika mara baba mara mama, unadhani kila mtu ambae amefanikiwa au anastahimili mikikimikiki ya maisha aliachiwa urithi?

Sikuonei huruma ila umenikasirisha sana. Unaingia JF kulalamika utafukuzwa baada ya siku 5, we unadhani nani anataka kukaa na mtu asiyejishughulisha na wala haishi kulalamika? Unadhani ukienda kwa mtu ukaomba kukaa huku ukiwa hata na sh. 2000 ya kuchangia chakula hatokuvumilia maadam anakuona unahangaika?

Uza hiyo simu, chukua hela utakayopata nenda nayo Kariakoo kanunue hata chupi au boxer dosen moja au hata nusu ukachuuze mtaani. Kuwa na kauli nzuri, omba watu wakuungishe ili upate kidogo chako cha halali. Acha kulia lia ujinga, tumia akili na ujitume.

 

[F9T]

hv ww mleta mada unataka kujiua, huujui utamu wa ugali?

 

[I J NJOVU]

"

Habari wakuu wa jf..
Nilikuja na thread hapa nkawa naomba advice na msaada kwa yoyote ataeweza... People came and gave me some advice... Japo until now sijapata kazi yoyote... But I was trying my best.. As I said my education level is form 6..

Leo nilienda dukani kununua sumu... My intation ilikua kujiua but sijafanikiwa kufanya hivo sababu nilipofika ninapoishi nikajukuta sina hiyo sumu and until now sijui niliipoteza vipi.. Nikaenda tena dukani but I realize that sikuw na pesa tena.. Nikarudi room na nikatafta vidonge nikavipata (panador + mseto na vidnge vingne ambavyo sjui vinaitwaje) nikanywa vyote kama ishirini hivi... But I wonder God... Now nipo naandika hii thread again.. Sijafa wala sijaumwa tumbo... Why me God? Everything ninavopitia na shida zote hizi why unataka niishi?
wakuu nimejitahidi kufanya ninavoweza niweze kuishi na sasa nilidhani nimepata mwanga cas people came to my thread and advised me na nkaanza kufanyia kazi ushauri WA baadhi ya watu but kabla sijamaliza wala sijafanikiwa lingine limetikea tena...Nimefukuzwa nilipokua nakaa (nilipokuwa nimehifadhiwa) nimefkuzwa kama mbwa and I didn't deserve that.. God why me? Am I looks like bad guy? Cha ajabu sijajua sababu za kufkuzwa like that.. Japo I feel like is because hawakupendi nikae pale tangu mwanzo ILA nililazimisha Tu cas sikua na jinsi ILA kusubiri hadi nipate njia.. Guys nakufa mwenzenu... Mi bado mdogo Sana kupitia nnayopitia... Nimepitia mengi magumu ya kudhatirishwa but I can't take it anymore.. Heri walio na wazazi ambao wanawatunza.. Namkumbuka my dad... Alinipenda na kunijari but now hakuna tena upendo kwangu... Labda mi Ni shetani nimekua... Mungu niache nipumzike na Mimi since 2007 nikiwa mdogo nmedharirishwa Sana baada ya mzee kufariki but until now nadharirika... Kazi sipati, hakuna hata anaenijari mpaka wanatokea anonymous WA jf kuja kunionea huruma... Nimechoka Mungu wangu. Nimechoka jamani... Nguvu zangu zmefika mwisho... Sijui niombe ushauri au niombe msaada maana nimedharirishwa Sana jamani.. Hapa nimejishkiza kwa mtu ambae amenpa 5 days niwe nimeondka cas ndgu zake wanakuja hapa nimefika mwisho WA mawazo yangu... Sina la kuwaza tena I can't take to be kijana WA mtaani na kuja kuingia kwenye tabia za ajabu but kufa Ni vema zaidi... Simwambii maama angu chochote... Najua hawezi kunitafuta ILA bora asikie Tu nimekufa... Msinione chizi kuandka hivi but nimefika mwisho... Mawazo yangu yameishia hapa.. I will find even sumu again tomorrow and I will kill myself... Nimedharirika na cha ajabu mtu nilimkuta somewhere Jana nikamwambia shida yangu but he told me niwe shoga... Just gay... Nijiuze... Kanijubu kwa dharau na kebehi na kusema if naweza kujiuza soko lipo... Guys I am a boy just only 21 years tena natimiza hyo 21 mwez WA 6 tareh 9...nimedharirishwa jamani Nina nini Mimi lakini... Nmeondoka kwa hasira and neno lake limenrudia tena Leo that's why nikatafta sumu na nmekunywa vidonge but sijafa why my Lord?
Nakufa nwenzenu nimeshindwa
sijui hata why naandika hapa jamii forum... No no no naweza kuwa chizi... I'm going to be crazy now... Sijui hata nawaza nn now sina cha kuwaza.... Wazazi pls pls waandalieni urithi watoto wenu kama elimu na pesa bank muwawekee hata kama bado wadogo... Baba angu hakufanya hivo na ona sasa navohangaika... Sina direction... Ndgu wabaya Sana jamani.... Let me die now cas nakumbka mengi jamani... Nalia hapa but sijui nani ataona machozi yangu... Wazazi hebu wawekeeni watoto wenu mazingra ya kupata haki Yao... Baba Baba Baba kama wewe Ni Baba pls jilinde walinde na familia yako PIA... Now najua umuhimu WA wazaz wote wawili... Najua uchungu WA kukosa mtu WA kumwita Baba au mtu WA kukusaidia ukipata tatizo... Let me die.., nmetoka mbali Sana mengi yamekuja kama mazuri but kumbe sivyo na nmekutana na hatari mbaya nkajua sitaishi but now naona nimefika mwisho WA kufight... Let me die... Sina pa kuishi sasa hata begi langu taweka wapi nkifkuzwa hapa after 5 days... Sina pa kuishi

"Mtoto wa kiume unalia lia nini, acha kulalamika unanyanyashwa fighting hard uwanyanyase hao wanaokusumbua.. next ukiandika post kaza sauti"