vanilla
JF-Expert Member
- Apr 19, 2012
- 448
- 356
Lets take a bit of our time with a few tips on how to Love unconditionally
Think of love as an action, not a feeling. A feeling is something we get from someone, and when we stop getting it, we often change our behavior somehow. If we have to do something, or be a certain way, in order to receive love, that love is conditional. Instead, if you start thinking of love as the behavior itself, the reward becomes the feeling you get when you act a certain way, not when someone else acts a certain way. And you can continue acting this way all the time, regardless of how other people behave--it becomes an act of generosity."love is not love except when it is generous."Feelings can not last, but you can renew them continuously with new actions. so lets try to love unconditionally, bila kutegemea chochote in return.....upendo uwe ni tabia yako na sio hisia tu ambazo hupungua ama kuisha kabisa wakati mwingine. is this possible????
Always ask yourself, what is the most loving thing I can do for this particular person in this particular moment? Love isn't really one size fits all; what might be a loving act toward one person could be harmful to another person, in that it doesn't help them get closer to becoming a truly happy human being. Unconditional love is a new decision you need to make in every situation, not a hard and fast rule you can apply to everyone all the time.
Remember that love doesn't mean making sure someone is always comfortable. If you believe loving someone is about fostering their growth, most people acknowledge that pain and discomfort are part of growth, and if you shield someone from all pain or discomfort, you are not loving them. So, don't confuse loving someone with blindly making them comfortable, satisfying their desires, and shielding them from any kind of pain. If you do, you are only making it difficult for them to grow as human beings. i hope tumeelewa hapa. kuna wale wanawekeza kwenye kuwapa wawapendao vitu ama pesa kwa nia ya kuwafanya wawe na furaha but that is not always the way.you can not be someones angel!!
Consider that if love is unconditional, it is given to everyone freely, including yourself. Another reason the previous step is important is because if you don't follow it, you're well on your way to becoming a people pleaser, which means you are not being unconditionally loving to yourself. Instead, recognize the times when doing what is best for you will occasionally have you out of sync with another. upendo unaanzia kwako wewe mwenyewe. jipende kwanza wewe then ndio uwapende wengine.FORGIVE:Even if someone doesn't apologize, it's inherently loving to both them and yourself to let go of your anger and resentment toward them.forgiving "is not something we do, but something we are." Again, don't mistake being willing to forgive for letting people walk all over you. How you act (lovingly) toward the person will vary, but your ability to practice unconditional love will be clouded if you hold on to negative feelings. lazima tukubali hapa kwamba msamaha ni muhimu sana kwenye mapenzi.hata kama mwenzio hajakuomba msamaha msamehe tu. because it will also set you free.
mnaweza kuongezea na mengine for the sake of unconditional LOVE!! Tchao!!
Think of love as an action, not a feeling. A feeling is something we get from someone, and when we stop getting it, we often change our behavior somehow. If we have to do something, or be a certain way, in order to receive love, that love is conditional. Instead, if you start thinking of love as the behavior itself, the reward becomes the feeling you get when you act a certain way, not when someone else acts a certain way. And you can continue acting this way all the time, regardless of how other people behave--it becomes an act of generosity."love is not love except when it is generous."Feelings can not last, but you can renew them continuously with new actions. so lets try to love unconditionally, bila kutegemea chochote in return.....upendo uwe ni tabia yako na sio hisia tu ambazo hupungua ama kuisha kabisa wakati mwingine. is this possible????
Always ask yourself, what is the most loving thing I can do for this particular person in this particular moment? Love isn't really one size fits all; what might be a loving act toward one person could be harmful to another person, in that it doesn't help them get closer to becoming a truly happy human being. Unconditional love is a new decision you need to make in every situation, not a hard and fast rule you can apply to everyone all the time.
Remember that love doesn't mean making sure someone is always comfortable. If you believe loving someone is about fostering their growth, most people acknowledge that pain and discomfort are part of growth, and if you shield someone from all pain or discomfort, you are not loving them. So, don't confuse loving someone with blindly making them comfortable, satisfying their desires, and shielding them from any kind of pain. If you do, you are only making it difficult for them to grow as human beings. i hope tumeelewa hapa. kuna wale wanawekeza kwenye kuwapa wawapendao vitu ama pesa kwa nia ya kuwafanya wawe na furaha but that is not always the way.you can not be someones angel!!
Consider that if love is unconditional, it is given to everyone freely, including yourself. Another reason the previous step is important is because if you don't follow it, you're well on your way to becoming a people pleaser, which means you are not being unconditionally loving to yourself. Instead, recognize the times when doing what is best for you will occasionally have you out of sync with another. upendo unaanzia kwako wewe mwenyewe. jipende kwanza wewe then ndio uwapende wengine.FORGIVE:Even if someone doesn't apologize, it's inherently loving to both them and yourself to let go of your anger and resentment toward them.forgiving "is not something we do, but something we are." Again, don't mistake being willing to forgive for letting people walk all over you. How you act (lovingly) toward the person will vary, but your ability to practice unconditional love will be clouded if you hold on to negative feelings. lazima tukubali hapa kwamba msamaha ni muhimu sana kwenye mapenzi.hata kama mwenzio hajakuomba msamaha msamehe tu. because it will also set you free.
- Love means wishing others to be happy. Love is about what we give not what we get.
- Practice doing something for someone each day with love alone. Do it without expecting anything in return. Do it without anyone knowing it.
mnaweza kuongezea na mengine for the sake of unconditional LOVE!! Tchao!!
