Crappy Story There once was a nonconformist bird that decided not to fly south for the winter. He said "I've had enough of this flying south every winter, I'll just stay right here on this farm, what's the big deal, anyway?" So he stayed. Winter came and was very cold, the nonconformist bird had never felt such cold weather and was afraid that he might freeze to death. Realizing he had made a big mistake by staying, he headed to a near by barn for shelter. On his way to the barn it began to snow. The poor bird was cold, tired and hungry. "Why did I stay?" he asked himself as he collapsed on the ground. As he lay there covered by the snow, a cow happened by. The cow, feeling the need to relieve himself, crapped right on the bird. At first being angry the bird said, "Who did this horrible thing to me, how dare someone crap on me, I'll get him for this!" The crap was too heavy for him to free himself. But, after a while the crap began to warm him and he forgot all about his anger. In fact he was so warm that he began to sing. A buzzard passing overheard the singing and went down to investigate. As he cleared away the crap to his delight he found the bird. The bird was so happy to be free from the crap that he thanked the buzzard, who then decided to eat the little bird. The moral of this story: Just because someone craps on you, it does not make them your enemy, and just because someone gets you out of the crap, it does not make them your friend.