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Saikolojia: Namna ya kutambua tabia ya mtu

Discussion in 'Jamii Intelligence' started by MziziMkavu, Sep 18, 2012.

  1. MziziMkavu

    MziziMkavu JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Sep 18, 2012
    Joined: Feb 3, 2009
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    Hakuna anayependa kusahihishwa, kugombana au kukemewa mbele za watu, hii ndiyo tabia ya watu wajeuri na walio na tabia za kitukutu. Mara nyingine hudhani wanapata sifa. Wako watu wa jinsi hii ambao hawawezi kukugombeza au (kukupa vidonge vyako) mkiwa wawili peke yenu, watangoja watu wengine wawepo ndiyo waanze kubwabwaja, cha kufanya jiepushe nao.

    Kwa kule kukimbiwa na marafiki, na kuwa mpweke, huongeza tabia za kitukutu na kijeuri na hii huwafanya watu hawa kutambulika haraka na kiurahisi zaidi.

    Zifuatazo ni alama zitakazokutambulisha mtu jeuri na mtukutu:

    a) Alama za kimaneno
    Mara kwa mara hupendelea kusema maneno haya vinywani mwao.
    Nakwambia bora unge…"
    Wewe sichochote, silolote…"
    Nakwambia, lazima u..."
    Fanya vile ninavyokuambia mimi…"
    Nataka u..."
    Wewe endelea tu tutaona..."

    b) Alama za kimwili
    Hupendelea kusimama wima
    Huwa wenye pozi kavu, ngumu (still and rigid pause)
    Hupenda kukunja mikono
    Hupenda kupayuka au kupigia wengine kelele
    Hupenda kuwanyooshea wengine vidole.
    Hupenda kuwazodoa wengine na vidole (hawezi kukuelekeza hadi kidole chake kikusukume)
    Hupenda kupiga au kugonga meza na viti akizungumza

    2. Watu wapole, waliotayari kukubali kushuka (Submissive)
    Hawa ni watu wanaopenda kujitoa sadaka kwa ajili ya manufaa ya wengine. Kwa hali hii ni rahisi watu hawa kujikuta wanatumiwa vibaya na watu wengine hasa wale wajeuri na watukutu tulio waangalia awali.

    Mara nyingi watu walio wapole na wanaokubali kushuka hupenda kuwatia moyo wengine wawe kama wao. Katika vizazi vilivyopita, wanawake walitegemewa zaidi kuwa watu wa kundi hili. Ni mabadiliko ya maisha na ya jamii ya leo ambayo yamemfanya hata mwanamke kuwa mjeuri na mshindani tofauti na jamii za awali.

    Kwa upande mwingine mfumo wa maisha wa vizazi vya nyuma ulimweka chini mwanamke na kuzuia maendeleo yake hasa katika kujiendelezea vipawa alivyonavyo kwa vigezo tu kwamba yeye ni wakukubali chochote na wakati wowote sasa tunayaona mabadiliko kwa kiasi fulani.

    Mara kwa mara watu wapole, na waliotayari kushuka wamekuwa wenye hisia za kinyonge na kutengwa, wakijihisi kutokuwa salama wakati mwingi. Kujijali, kujipenda na kujithamini kwa watu hawa siyo kwa kudumu, bali kunakuwa na nyakati za kuyumbayumba kutokana na mazingira. Hawa siyo watu wenye ujasiri ndani yao wenyewe na hata katika vile wavifanyavyo.

    Mara mtu wa kundi hili anapokutana na mtu mjeuri na mtukutu, hofu na ujasiri wake hupungua sana, na anaweza kukubali kupingwa hata kama alikuwa ana haki. Kwa sababu mara nyingi watu wa jinsi hii wanajua kuwa kwa upole wao watu wengi wamekuwa wakiwatumia na kuwachezea, hii imewafanya wawe ni watu wenye vihasira vya mara kwa mara.

    Kwa sababu wameunganishwa na hisia zao zaidi, ni rahisi wao kuzielezea hisia zao kwa mtu mwingine, hata kama hisia zao ni za kujutia kile walicho kifanya wenyewe. Mara nyingi husikia amani kwa yale wanayofanya au kuyaamua.

    Ingawa mara nyingine mambo huwaendela tofauti na walivyopanga, watu hawa hufahamu kuwa hawanabudi kukubali kosa au na kuwa tayari kujifunza kutokana na yale makosa.

    Mambo yanapowaendea vema hupenda kujisifia na kujiona walio juu. Mara nyingine misimamo yao huwashawishi na kuwavutia wengine watazame kama wao, sio watu wanaopenda kuwatumia wengine vibaya (being manipulative) kama vile kuwasema au kuwasengenya wengine, hii huwafanya kuwa na wafuasi au washabiki wengi zaidi.

    Kule kujiamini kwao na kuwa na ujasiri hupunguza sana msongo wa mawazo maishani mwao na hii huwasaidia kuelekeza nishati na nguvu zao zote katika kufikia malengo waliojiwekea.

    Mara kwa mara sio watu wenye mabadiliko ya hisia (change of attitude) na hii hufanya mahusiano yao na wengine kuwa yasiyoyumba na mawasiliano baina yao na wengine huwa wazi, sio watu wakuficha wanachokiona, uwazi walionao kuwaweka huru.

    Hujisikia vema hujipenda na kujithamini muda mwingi. Hujijengea hisia za usalama na imani kwa sababu ya mawasiliano bora walionayo na wale wanaowazunguka, hii pia husababishwa na wao kuelewa fika wajibu wao na wajibu wa wengine pia.

    Ingawa wanaweza kuwa wabishi, lakini huheshimu misimamo ya wengine na kupenda ya kwao iheshimiwe pia na hii huwafanya kuwa na ushirika na wale wanaowazunguka. Mara nyingi ni wazuri katika kuwatia wengine moyo kujitahidi zaidi.

    Alam za kuwatambua:

    Alama za maneno
    Nahisi……. Najisikia kuu……………"
    Ningependa kuu…………"
    Wewe unaonaje hapa/mawazo yako nini………….."
    Unadhani njia gani bora kulishuhulikia hili ……….."
    Nafikiri……….."
    Hembu tu…………….."

    Alama za kimwili
    Hupenda kuwa wima ila wenye pozi laini (relaxed stance)
    Huangalia kijasiri na kuangalia usoni (kukodoa macho).
    Huwa na hisia za upole, kujitawala na kujimiliki wenyewe

    Kwa vyovyote vile, mara zote unapokutana na mtu mwenye tabia yeyote kati ya hizi tatu kumbuka una haki ya kufanya yafuatayo;

    Jifunze kuelezea hisia zako njema (usiogopoe au kuona aibu kwakuwa hutokuwa umejitendea haki)
    Jifunze kuzielezea hisia zako mbaya au za hasira, kamwe usifunike. Mfano; "Sipendi kabisa unavyokula"
    Jifunze kusema hapana, Mfano; "Hapana sitaweza kufika leo"

    Toa wazo la kweli, usipake watu mafuta kwa mgongo wa chupa. Mfano; "Mimi siliafiki hilo jambo hata kidogo"
    Kiri kuwa umekasirika, hasa pale ambapo haunabudi kukasirika.

    Mfano: "Kweli umeniudhi sana baada ya kusema hayo maneno". Usitoe tabasamu la mamba tu, kutabasamu wakati ndani yako unahisi kuungua moto.
     
  2. nipeukweli

    nipeukweli JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Oct 5, 2012
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    naam...
     
  3. E

    Elizabeth Dominic Platinum Member

    #3
    Oct 6, 2012
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    Nafikiri mimi ni haina ya mtu wa pili......
     
  4. majany

    majany JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Oct 7, 2012
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    mtu hawezi kuwa hybrid hapo kweli???
     
  5. manuu

    manuu JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Oct 7, 2012
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    Na hata bila hiyo saikolijia nadhani waweza tambua tabia ya mtu hata kwa mavazi yake,tembea yake n.k.
     
  6. Angel Msoffe

    Angel Msoffe JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Oct 7, 2012
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    mi niko kati kati ya makundi hayo ma2
     
  7. Root

    Root JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Oct 7, 2012
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    Nilihama toka kundi la kwanza kwenda la pl

    Sent from my BlackBerry 9860 using JamiiForums
     
  8. chumvichumvi

    chumvichumvi JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Oct 9, 2012
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    Mie nipo makundi yeyote inategemea na nyakati
     
  9. mathematics

    mathematics JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Oct 9, 2012
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    nitarudi baadaye kusoma,
     
  10. Iron Lady

    Iron Lady JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Oct 10, 2012
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    tabia ya mtu is never permanent hubadilika kutokana na mazingira na hali na watu anaoishi nao kwa wakati huo husika

    mf mtu anaweza akawa na hizi
    Alama za kimwili
    Hupendelea kusimama wima
    Huwa wenye pozi kavu, ngumu (still and rigid pause)
    Hupenda kukunja mikono

    lakini asiwe mtukutu wala mkorofi ila mchapakazi na ana mood ya serious wakati wote ila ukiongoea nae ni mtu mwenye maneno ya busara matamu na mtaratibu mno.
    human behaviour is very complex to explain n understand it.
     
  11. mayenga

    mayenga JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Oct 15, 2012
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    Je,utamgunduaje mtu anayepretend?
     
  12. Kiranga

    Kiranga JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Oct 15, 2012
    Joined: Jan 29, 2009
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    Hii ina apply kwa tamaduni zote kutoka stockbrokers wazungu wa NYSE, watu wa misitu ya Amazon, Congo na aborigines wa Papua NG na Australia huko?

    Tusije ku copy paste tamaduni za watu huko, ambazo kwao mtu kuongea na wewe huku anaangalia chini ni dalili ya uongo, wakati kwetu ni dalili ya heshima na haiba.
     
  13. Fyong'oxi

    Fyong'oxi JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Oct 15, 2012
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    Na hii imekaaje ??, kwa wanaosema mtu mpole/asiyeongeaongea akipandwa na hasira ni mbaya kuliko mtu mkorofi
     
  14. K

    Kahinda JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Oct 18, 2012
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    Mkuu kuna tofauti kubwa kati ya Mpole na Mkimya. Watu wengi wanapo mwona mtu mkimya wanamwita mpole, hao ni wau wawili tofauti.
     
  15. MSeush

    MSeush Member

    #15
    Nov 3, 2012
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    Asante kwa somo lako nimejifunza kitu..
     
  16. THE BIG SHOW

    THE BIG SHOW JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Nov 14, 2012
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    MURUA KABISAA
    KARIBU SUPU YA SAMAKI MKUU
    SATO LAKINI
    :smile: :smile:
     
  17. Nyakageni

    Nyakageni JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Dec 15, 2012
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    Na yote hii ni malezi utotoni.
     
  18. Patty B

    Patty B Member

    #18
    Dec 23, 2012
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    Naam nimeipenda hiyo...!
     
  19. Nyalotsi

    Nyalotsi JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Dec 24, 2012
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    sipendi watu kama wewe! Chit chat mtafanya nini sasa? Kwa nini ucopy habari ndefu hivyo aafu kamchango ka chit chat?
     
  20. BRUCE LEE

    BRUCE LEE JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Dec 24, 2012
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    mi sitabiriki sipo katika makundi hayo yote labda mwana saikolojia atueleze kama kuna kundi jingine kwani mi ni kimya sana na pia sipendi kum comand mtu na pia sipendi mtu anikomand ukinizengua ntakuchenchia mpaka utajuta kunifaham, naweza kwambia maneno machace ila yakakuuma wiki nzima.
     
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