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nahitaji ushauri wenu wana mmu

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by gfsonwin, May 29, 2012.

  1. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #1
    May 29, 2012
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    Mimi ni kijana wa kiume (39) niliye anza kuoa miaka tisa iliyopita. Mpaka sas nina wake wawili na kwakuwa inmani yangu inaruhusu basi sikuona kwanini niwe na mmoja ili hali dunia imejaa wanawake wazuri na warembo na kila mmoja anamvuto wa pekee.

    Nilimuoa bi mdogo miaka 4 iliyopita, nikiwa tayari nina watoto 2 kwa bi mkubwa. Mungu kanibariki sasa ninao 3 yaani bi mkubwa 2 na mdogo 1 na sina mpango wa kuendelea tena kuzaa. Kuna tatizo moja ambalo limejitokeza ndio maana nimeamua kuja hapa kutaka ushauri wenu.

    Wake zangu hawa bi mkubwa na bi mdogo wanapendana sana, kiasi kwamba napata raha kuish nao, mdogo kwa sheria zetu basi anamwita mkubwa dada. Kila mtu ana mji wake wa maana kwamba nimewajengea ila siyo maeneo ya karibu kiasi kwamba wakitaka kutembeleana lazima wapande gari.

    Mimi ninayepanga zamu kwangu hainipi shuda kwani yote ni miji yangu so nikiwa kwa dada mtu mdogo mtu najuaa na kinyume chake. Sikuwahi hata siku moja kuchukia urafiki wa wake zangu na nilipendezwa sana wala sikujua nini kimo kati yao wao nisichokijua.

    Kumbe wote wawili wana vidumu (mabuzi) katika kuchunguza nikajua kuwa dada na mdogo wake huwa wana vibuzi maringo na nikiwa zamu basi asiye kuwa na zamu anatoka na kibuzi chake. Kiasi kwamba siyo wao tu wenye zamu kumbe hata mimi napangiwa zamu.

    kwa kweli nimechukizwa na hali hii na sijui nifanyeje manake sitaki kuongeza mke mwingine hawa nilio nao naona nawamudu isitoshe sitaki kuzaa tena watoto tulio nao wanatosha.
    Naombeni ushauri juu ya hili nifanyeje au wewe ungefanyeje kama mwanaume mwingine anakuja kulala nyumbani kwako na kula vyakula mpaka wake zako? kila mmoja anakibuzi chake na hivi vibuzi vinafahamiana.

    Nawasilisha

    tafadhali kashfa na matusi usinitumie ukiona huwez kushaur basi pita tu. ushauri wa hekima utapokelewa na kufanyiwa kazi
     
  2. Yummy

    Yummy JF-Expert Member

    #2
    May 29, 2012
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    Mkuki kwa nguruwe......
    Sioni kama kuna tatizo we endelea tu na mapenzi kwa wake zako,kuoa mke mwingine sio solution na hata yy atakua na kidumu tu. Kwaheri
     
  3. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #3
    May 29, 2012
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    Ahhh well, kama we unaona unastahili kuwa na wawili na wao wameona isiwe tabu. Wenzio nao wana mahitaji ambayo pengine wanahitaji kuyatimiza kila siku kama ufanyavyo wewe kwahiyo wanafanya lile linalowapa wanachohitaji.

    Naomba nisichangie zaidi maana mimi naona kuwa na wake wawili au zaidi ni tabia ya kibinafsi hivyo naweza nisikupe ushauri unaotaka wewe.
     
  4. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #4
    May 29, 2012
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    Duh!Nilikuwa najua wewe mwanamke,ngoja nisome halafu nichangie!
     
  5. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #5
    May 29, 2012
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    asante sana Yummy ila kumbuka mimi sijaoa kuwakomoa bali naruhusiwa na wao ni wanawake wanapaswa wawe na mume mmoja tu.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  6. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #6
    May 29, 2012
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    well said Lizzy. lakin siyo ubinafsi kama unavyodhani ww
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  7. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #7
    May 29, 2012
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    Eiyer, swala la jisia nafikiri halina mashiko sana kwa hapa ila nahitaj zaid ushauri wako
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  8. Joseph

    Joseph JF-Expert Member

    #8
    May 29, 2012
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    Balaa limeingia ndani ya nyumba zako na usipoangalia basi siku zako zipo mashakani,fuata moyo wako baada ya kuwa umejiridhisha kuwa wanakuendea kinyume na kama uliweza kuoa basi pia kwa sheria za dini yako unaweza kuacha maana wanachokufanyia wake zako ni dhambi na una haki zote kuwaacha na kuoa wake wengine.
     
  9. Wizzo

    Wizzo JF-Expert Member

    #9
    May 29, 2012
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    sheria nyingine bana,kwanini wanawake wao wasiruhusiwe kua na zaid ya mmja.we piga kimya tu
     
  10. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #10
    May 29, 2012
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    Kwanza pole.Matatizo yako yanaanzia kwako mwenyewe.Sidhani kama ulijiuliza unataka nini kwa mkeo mpaka ulipooa ukagundua hana ukaoa mwingine na mwingine mpaka wa4.Pia wake zako wana mahitaji kwako sidhani kama unayatimiza,hebu zungumza nao kwa upendo uwaulize halaeu uone watakujibu kitu gani.Najua wanaume huwa tuna mambo ya ubabe lakini sio kila mahali ni ubabe,busara inahitajika hapo!
     
  11. MwanajamiiOne

    MwanajamiiOne Platinum Member

    #11
    May 29, 2012
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    gfsonwin pole sana kaka kwa maswahibu yaliyokukuta. Ninaamini kabisa kuwa hao wakezo ni wadini moja na wewe na wanaelewa na kukubaliana na dini isemavyo juu ya ndoa za aina hiyo. Kama ni hivyo basi wanakukosea na wanamkosea MUNGU wanayemuabudu. Hakuna justification ya wanachokifanya kwa sababu hawakulazimishwa kuingia katinda ndoa na wewe.

    Cha kufanya, waketishe chini ukiwa na ushahidi wenye vielelezo vya kutosha na uongee nao kama marafiki zako, wakueleze sababu za wao kufanya hivyo kisha mkubaliane way forward!

    Chini ya kapeti: Jaribu hata mkuyati ..............:israel:
     
  12. promiseme

    promiseme JF-Expert Member

    #12
    May 29, 2012
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    Hayo unayo yaongea umeyaona kwa macho yako au umeyasikia au unahisi? sababu dhana mbaya na hata kama wanapenda kama mtu na dada yake lakini kila mtu anaakili yake haiwezekani kuwana kibuzi mwenzie akajua,ebu fanya uchunguzi tena, jaribu kukaa nae uwaulize nini kimepungua jee ni umepunguza majambozi au malezi na mapenzi umepunguza? ebu kaa nao chini kila mmoja kwa wakati wake...inshallah utalipata jibu...
     
  13. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #13
    May 29, 2012
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    Eiyer umesema vizuri sana labda nikwambie hivi mimi binafsi ni mfanyabiashara mzuri nina maduka ya hardwares ya kwangu binafsi 4. ila pia kila bi mkubwa anabiashara yake mwenyewe ambayo mtaji nimempa mimi mwenyewe. Na wakati nafanya hayo niliwauliza kila mtu aseme anataka nini nisije nikaforce so walivyochagua ndivyo nilivyo watimizia.

    Istoshe maisha ya ndani siku nyinine huwa naenda nao shopping wote wawili, za vyakula na hata nguo na mapambo ya kike kwa mujibu wa sheria za kiislam. Panapo matatizo huwa najitoa ukweni kote pasi ubaguzi na wao wote wanashirikiana vizuri sana.

    mpaka sasa hawajasema kwa nini huwa wanatoka nje ya ndoa, na mimi niliwaambia sitokaa nitoke ndio maana ninao wao wawili na nawapenda sana. nimefika mahali nimehisi hata mambo mabaya juu yao inshalla Mungu anisamehe.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  14. Yummy

    Yummy JF-Expert Member

    #14
    May 29, 2012
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    Eiyer mwenzangu sio peke yako....kuna siku huyu mtu alisema amejifungua jamani au mimi ndio nachanganya madawa hapa???
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  15. biggirl

    biggirl Member

    #15
    May 29, 2012
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    imani imechakachuliwa hiyo..nani asiyependa kuwa one husband &one wife?imekula kwako sorry to say bt chekecha kaka hiyo imani itakuumiza
     
  16. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #16
    May 29, 2012
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    Kwahiyo we hujui kabisa nini wanachopewa na vidumu vyao? Ni hiyo huduma usiyoweza kuwapa wote kila siku.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  17. Yummy

    Yummy JF-Expert Member

    #17
    May 29, 2012
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    Ama kweli za JF, changanya na zako
     
  18. Nivea

    Nivea JF-Expert Member

    #18
    May 29, 2012
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    hebu chukua akili zako changanya na za mbayuwayu then mshauri mtoa mada unapotosha watu still sio solution.
     
  19. Asprin

    Asprin JF-Expert Member

    #19
    May 29, 2012
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    Kumbe gfsonwin ni kidume kama mimi........???

    Nimekoma kutongoza kwa PM.

    Ngoja niende zangu facebook nikajaribu bahati yangu kule.

    Ila kiukweli: We umetaka wawili na wao wametaka wawili.......... Bahati mbaya sana na hivyo vidumu vyao navyo vina wawili....... Sasa ushauri wa kibabubabu. OA WA TATU ili uwakomoe wao wawe na wawili we uwe na watatu.

    HITIMISHO: Kuoa mke zaidi ya mmoja si suluhisho la kupambana infidelity. Infidelity is inevitable.
    Ukiamua kucheat, cheat responsibly.

    Sawa eh?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  20. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #20
    May 29, 2012
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    Hii inaweza kuwa moja ya sababu,lakini inaweza isiwepo kabisa.Sio kila anaetoka nje hatimiziwi,hapa kuna mambo mengi sana ndo maana nimemwambia azunguze nao kwa upendo!
     
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