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Mwanamke: Kama unaishi na mwanaume wa aina hii, basi pinga usikubali kuwa mjinga………….

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Mtambuzi, Jul 26, 2012.

  1. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #1
    Jul 26, 2012
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    Na ukijaribu kunipiga tu, utajua mimi ni mwanamke wa namna gani, hutakuja kunisahau..........!

    Uzoefu unaonesha kwamba baadhi ya wanaume au wanawake hutumia kile walichokiona kutoka kwa wazazi wao katika ndoa zao. Tabia za wazazi huakisi sana maisha ya watoto wao hususan katika maisha yao ya ndoa, labda kama watajitambua na kujivua gamba, lakini vinginevyo watakuwa wanatumia kile walichokiona na kujifunza kutoka kwa wazazi wao.
    Kwa mfano mwanamke anayeishi na mwanaume mnyanyasaji na mpigani, ni dhahiri kama wana mtoto wa kiume anakuwa na uwezekanao mara saba zaidi kuja kuwa mnyanyasaji kwa mkewe atakapokuwa mkubwa. Na kama ni binti ana uwezekanao mara tatu zaidi kuja kuwa mtu wa kupata vipigo atakapokuwa ameolewa. Hapa wa kulaumiwa ni wazazi, kwa sababu wao ndio wamewafanya wawe hivyo. Kwa kuwa wazazi ndio mashujaa wa watoto wao, huakisi tabia halisi za wazazi wao.

    Hebu fikiria una miaka sita na unasikia ukiwa kwenye chumba chako baba yako anapompiga mama yako! Mama yako anapiga mayowe na kulia akiomba msaada! Unamsikia baba yako akimpiga mama yako ngumi na mateke na kumwita majina machafu machafu ambayo kimsingi hutakiwi kuyasikia. Utafanya nini ukiwa ni mtoto na uko katika mazingira kama haya? Ukweli ni kwamba huwezi kuondoka! Na unakuwa huna uchaguzi zaidi yakukubali kuishi na wazazi wako ambao kimsingi aina ya maisha wanayoishi sio kama mke na mume bali mume na mtumwa wake ambaye ni mama yako. Unalazimishwa kuishi hivyo, hutaki hata marafiki zako waje nyumbani kwenu. Mama kila siku ana manundu mwilini kwa vipigo kutoka kwa baba yako. Na si hivyo tu, baba kila siku akirudi nyumbani anaaanza kufoka! Na sasa siri zenu zote ziko nje. Pale mtaani familia yenu imekuwa ni gumzo, huna raha kama watoto wengine. Balaa gani hili!
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    Mie bado nawalaumu wanawake wanaokubali ujinga huu, ingawa kuna watu wananishambulia humu jamvini, lakini kwa hili siwezi kulinyamazia. Ni ujinga tu ndio unaosababisha wakubali kuishi kwenye ndoa za namna hii. Kama wewe ni binadamu kamili ambaye umezaliwa ukiwa na akili zako timamu, kwa nini ukubali kuishi na mwanaume mfuajaji ? Kama unataka kuishi na mwanaume wa aina hii, basi pinga usikubali kufanywa gunia la mazoezi. Simama imara ukiwa umeshika kikaango na umwambie, ‘Njoo unipige uone. Na siku ukijaribu kunipiga tu, utajua mimi ni mwanamke wa namna gani, hutakuja kusahau.' Au kama huwezi hilo basi zuia upigwaji kwa njia nyingine. Lakini uzoefu unaonesha kwamba, njia iliyo bora kabisa ni kuondoka kwenye uhusiano huo.

    Kama uko kwenye ndoa ya mateso na unajikuta huwezi kutoka, umekubali kuwa fuko la mazoezi la mumeo, jiulize ni kwa nini. Anzia kwa wazazi waliokulea na kujiuliza kama wewe siyo mama yako ambaye alikubali kupokea vipigo kwa mumewe huku akiendelea kuvumilia na kuishi katika ndoa hiyo ya mateso. Kama ndivyo, basi kataa kuwa mama yako. Anza safari ya kuwa wewe ambaye huko tayari kuwa mtumwa wa mtu kwa kuhofia kusimama mwenyewe kwa miguu yako. Amua sasa na utamudu, kwani wewe ni binadamu kamili na huhitaji kukamilishwa na mtu mwingine.
     
  2. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jul 26, 2012
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    Mtambuzi unataka watu wakanyanyuliwe vigoda leo nini
    Ila ni uzamani sana kuanza kumpiga mwanamke makofi na mangumi na mateke katika wakati kama huu wakati mna uwezo wa kuka ana kuyamaliza salama
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  3. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jul 26, 2012
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    mmmh! binafs nawza kuvumilia kila kitu but not kichapo manake pakifika hapa jamani tunatembezeana. uuuwiiiiiiiiii khaaa eeeh! ndipo litakapo timia lile neno mpalestina.

    cheza vyovyote na mimi but usiniguse kwa kipondo lol! vingine vyote navumilia ila hili hapana na nilishalisema kabisaa.
     
  4. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #4
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    gfsonwin nilisahau kuweka angalizo usichangie hii mada....................LOL
     
  5. Chauro

    Chauro JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 26, 2012
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    Ngoja nikae kimya hapa naweza ongea pumba mbaya...Mtambuzi endelea kuwapa elimu wenzio pheeew!!
     
  6. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

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    Mtambuzi basi naomba tu kiae kimya manake naweza kuta mnaitembezzea kichapo LP
     
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  7. BAK

    BAK JF-Expert Member

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    Uendelee hivyo hivyo hakuna sababu yoyote ya mwanaume kukunyanyasa kwa vipigo, kama ameshindwa basi afunge virago siyo kutaka kukuharibu reception yako au kukutia ulema.
     
  8. Ruttashobolwa

    Ruttashobolwa JF-Expert Member

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    Asante mtambuzi kwa ushauri mzuri kwa wa dada na jua leo wergine watapima waone.
     
  9. Githeri

    Githeri JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 26, 2012
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    Hii uliyosema ndio saikolojia ya human development. Mazingira mtu aliyokulia na tabia za wazazi zinachangia muonekano na tabia ya mtoto/mtu. Kubadilika si rahisi labda kama utapata washauri na ukaelewa chanzo cha tatizo lako.
     
  10. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

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    gfsonwin kw akweli mambo mengine nayo yanatakiwa yaangaliwe
    Uko ndani ya nyumba na watoto wanasikia mama yao anapigwa anaomba msaada na kelele juu
    Au mara anatoka mbio ndani ya chumba nguo mkononi au imeraruliwa na makovu anakimbia
    Watoto wanaangalia na kusikia aina kwa aina za matusi yasiyoweza hata kusemeka
    Je ni aiona gani ya malezi unawapa watoto wako
    Je watakua wakiwa na wazo gani kichwani mwao
    Kuwa baba ni katili na mwenye matusi
    Kuwa baba anatumia nguvu zake dhidi ya mama kwa kuwa mama hajiwezi au hawezi kumjibu
    Ustaarabu ni kukaa na kuyamaliza bila hata watoto kujua kuwa mama na baba wana ugomvi ndani ya nyumba
    Yaani mkitoka master bed room mnacheka as if dakikka tano zilizopita mlikuwa mnagombana wala watoto hawaelewi ugomvi wenu wala nini
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  11. Paloma

    Paloma JF-Expert Member

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    ....eeeeh
    ntarudi babu!!!!!
     
  12. PetCash

    PetCash JF-Expert Member

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    Mkuu tukilaumu wazazi basi tulaumu na wazazi wao maana kama kosa liko kwenye inheriting the abuse trait pake yake na mtenda hahusiki then this is an endless and recurring problem.
    wazazi watalaumu wazazi wao ambao watalamu wazazi wao and so on....
    mpaka kwa Adamu(was he abusive too ?)
    Sijui ila hili tatizo ni kama Ukimwi kwamba to stop it 'It begins with you'...
    Binafsi I will not (Namuomba sana Mungu anisaidie) rise a hand over my wife.
    Najua the minute the hand lands on her body I will receive more pain than she probably will because I will put a scar in her heart that will probably never heal if not taking so long to heal.
    Yani mama akipigwa the whole family will have to suffer the pain. Unamuambiaje mtoto I am your father and I love you wakati anajua umeinflict pain on their beloved mother?
    The best gift you can give your children is to love their mother, trust me!
     
  13. mdida

    mdida JF-Expert Member

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    binafsi hii hali ilishanikuta wakati tuko wadogo ila nakumbuka nikiwa darasa la saba na mimi ndo nilikuwa wa mwisho kwetu, siku moja nilimwambia mama ni kwa nini asiondoke pale nyumbani coz alikuwa anapigwa sana, mama akasema akiondoka tutateseka nilimwambia kuwa kama ikitokea akakuua je nani atatulea? akakosa jibu, baada ya kile kipindi akapigwa tena ma baba mie nilikuwa nimeenda shule niliporudi nilikuta mother analia kuwa ameumizwa! mie nilishikwa hasira na kumwambia: wewe kaa tu si umeamua mwenyewe kukaa. nililia sana na kumlaumu mama kuwa anajitakia mwenyewe, ila baada ya mie kwenda sekondary aliondoka na mpaka sasa anasema mie ndo niliemshtua. Hali kama hiyo nilishaapa siwezi kuivumilia hata siku moja coz nilishaona.
     
  14. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

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    unajua hakuna sababu yyte ya mimi kudhalilishwa mbele ya wanangu duh! kimada mlete lala naye miye wala hanipi shida manake mwili ni wako ila kipondo kabisa umenifanya miye mwanao ama?? hvi aisee hapa tupigane wewe ukirusha ngumi miye narusha mwiko hata stuli hivi humo ndani hamnaga hata visu ama pasi. namkumbuka mama mmoja aliweka pasi kwenye umeme moto namba 3 tena ikapata moto ile mbaya ile bwana anakaribia na ngumi yake mkononi mama kainyanyua pumbavu tiya kifua bwana kaungua kifua umbo la pasi. akabaki kulala mika manka umenichoma manka umenichoma. baada ya hapo mwanamke akampeleka mumewe hosp na mpaka leo nidham khaa!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  15. charminglady

    charminglady JF-Expert Member

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    asante kwa ushauri mzuri mzee Mtambuzi. cku nikiingia kwenye ndoa ntaitafta hii thread niitumie. . .
     
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  16. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

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    Mr Rocky kweli mi ni mtu nipendaye sana amani na nidham ila usinivunjie heshima yangu. eti wanangu wako hapo miye nakula mabao nalia kwa b/rum? kwakosa gani hasa? hata kama ni nini hakuna mwenye hayo mamlaka aisee baba yangu mzazi japo ni wa zamani alkn hakuwah kunipiga hadi leo hii nazeeka sembuse wewe umenikuta mkubwa?

    nifanyie yote yasiyoumiza mwili wangu ama kujeruhi mwili but not this one hivi jamani nisiseme manake kweli sifichi ile roho ya mpalestina itaonekana laivu. wacha tugawane majengo bana kwani nini? weye ukienda hosp miye naenda cage.

    panapokosa tuongee na unipe muda kwa kujitetea na nikiona nataka yaishe kwa amani nakuangukia magotini nisamehe. zaid ya hapo hapana aisee.
     
  17. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

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    Mtambuzi nishashuhudia sana haya mambo ya mama kupigwa na baba kwa familia jirani yetu
    Kila siku ilikuwa ni kipigo kutoka kwa baba kwenda kwa mama yule
    Yaani ni painful unapomuona huyo mama kesho yake na mangeu bado anahangaika kumhudumia the same man ambaye jana yake alimtwanga makofi na mateke
    Bado anampikia na kumfulia licha ya kwamba ana maumivu ya kipigo
    Yaani unhisi maumivu anayopata yule mama
     
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  18. BAK

    BAK JF-Expert Member

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    Kujitetea dhidi ya vipigo toka kwa mume/boyfriend ni muhimu sana. Mtambuzi halafu si kila aliyeona Baba akimpa vipigo mama huwa anarithi tabia hiyo mbaya naye kuitumia katika mahusiano yake. Katika mazungumzo na rafiki zangu wa karibu kuhusu swala hili wengi ambao walishuhudia vipigo dhidi ya mama zao hawajawahi kumgusa GF/Wife au hata kwa kibao kimoja au hata kumfinya. Nawadharau sana wanaume ambao hushindwa kumaliza tofauti zao na maGF/wake zao kwa njia za amani na kuamua kutumia vipigo.

     
  19. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

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    BAK umesema umesema kwa hekima sana ila kama jitu halina hekima hii aisee wewe mwaga mboga miye namwaga ugali kama mbwai na iwe mbwai kwani nini bana????............ khaaa!.................... ukiona mama anyedhalilishwa kwa kichapo utamuonea huruma halafu usiku jitu linakupekua eti linataka unataka????.................... aisee utaitafuta revola ama kopo la blue band. lakin miye hapana kwanza huko mbona hufiki arifuu uwiii heeeeeeeeeeeee!
     
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  20. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #20
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    Mkuu BAK, nilichokisema ni hiki hapa..........
     
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