Kana-Ka-Nsungu
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 4, 2007
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Hii article nimeidonoa kutoka kwenye yahoo personal na kuifanyia editing kidogo ili kuifupisha isiwachoshe lakini naamini, having read it all myself, itakuwa very useful kwa wengi wetu hapa...
ARE YOU AND YOUR VALENTINE COMPATIBLE?
7 signs you may have found Mr. or Ms. Right by Krista Bloom, Ph.D. LCSW
In happy, successful relationships, both partners seem to be on the same page and to really enjoy life together. The more you have in common with the other person on the things that count, the more successful you are likely to be in the relationship. I call this the "compatibility factor."
Here are seven forms of compatibility to look for in your valentine.
1. Personality Compatibility. What's inside the person is the most important factor, because that is going to be there always. Decide what personality types you are most attracted to. Many people enjoy a great sense of humor, for example. Others look for someone with certain spiritual values.
2. Chemistry Compatibility. You have to click in the physical department. Being mismatched in this area can lead to resentments and have a long-term effect on your love life together. For example, if one of you believes in PDA (Public Display of Affection) and the other is adamantly against it, that may cause serious problems over time.
3. Communication Compatibility. Are you and your valentine on the same page in terms of communication? See if your conversations flow, and if they are enjoyable for both of you. "Avoid the temptation to talk about past relationships"
4. Friends and Family Compatibility. This comes later, usually after you have been dating for a few months. Do you get along with one another's friends and family, or are there clashes and conflict? If you don't get along with your valentine's inner circle, then the relationship may not work, unless you love the person enough to grin and bear it.
5. Health and Nutrition Compatibility. Are you a health food nut or a junk food junkie? Are you a speed-walker or a channel surfer? See if your health-related lifestyles match or not. Although this may seem silly, later in life health becomes more of an issue for people.
6. Financial Compatibility. Money is one of the things couples fight about most often.If you share similar financial goals and means, this can be very helpful.
7. Lifestyle Compatibility. Having common interests can really help in a relationship. If you share a passion for something, you can have even more fun together in your free time.
WHAT IF YOU ARE NOT COMPATIBLE?
Sometimes, there are so many clashes in so many areas that the relationship begins to suffer. What can you do if you and your valentine are not compatible? You can:
1. Take an inventory of your relationship. Look more in depth into life's domains -- green flags that bring you together or red flags that pull you apart.
2. Accept things as they are. The main idea is to look for workability, not perfection. We have to let some things go or we'll never be happy in any relationship. Enjoy and appreciate each other for who you are!
3. Change and ask for change. If you are both willing to make changes, be specific and set realistic goals about what you are willing to do and how things could improve between you.
Natumaini hivi vidondoo vitakupeni mwanga wa kutosha kujua kama umempata mwandani wako sahihi katika valentine hii. I wish you all a happy valentine's day- enjoy!
ARE YOU AND YOUR VALENTINE COMPATIBLE?
7 signs you may have found Mr. or Ms. Right by Krista Bloom, Ph.D. LCSW
In happy, successful relationships, both partners seem to be on the same page and to really enjoy life together. The more you have in common with the other person on the things that count, the more successful you are likely to be in the relationship. I call this the "compatibility factor."
Here are seven forms of compatibility to look for in your valentine.
1. Personality Compatibility. What's inside the person is the most important factor, because that is going to be there always. Decide what personality types you are most attracted to. Many people enjoy a great sense of humor, for example. Others look for someone with certain spiritual values.
2. Chemistry Compatibility. You have to click in the physical department. Being mismatched in this area can lead to resentments and have a long-term effect on your love life together. For example, if one of you believes in PDA (Public Display of Affection) and the other is adamantly against it, that may cause serious problems over time.
3. Communication Compatibility. Are you and your valentine on the same page in terms of communication? See if your conversations flow, and if they are enjoyable for both of you. "Avoid the temptation to talk about past relationships"
4. Friends and Family Compatibility. This comes later, usually after you have been dating for a few months. Do you get along with one another's friends and family, or are there clashes and conflict? If you don't get along with your valentine's inner circle, then the relationship may not work, unless you love the person enough to grin and bear it.
5. Health and Nutrition Compatibility. Are you a health food nut or a junk food junkie? Are you a speed-walker or a channel surfer? See if your health-related lifestyles match or not. Although this may seem silly, later in life health becomes more of an issue for people.
6. Financial Compatibility. Money is one of the things couples fight about most often.If you share similar financial goals and means, this can be very helpful.
7. Lifestyle Compatibility. Having common interests can really help in a relationship. If you share a passion for something, you can have even more fun together in your free time.
WHAT IF YOU ARE NOT COMPATIBLE?
Sometimes, there are so many clashes in so many areas that the relationship begins to suffer. What can you do if you and your valentine are not compatible? You can:
1. Take an inventory of your relationship. Look more in depth into life's domains -- green flags that bring you together or red flags that pull you apart.
2. Accept things as they are. The main idea is to look for workability, not perfection. We have to let some things go or we'll never be happy in any relationship. Enjoy and appreciate each other for who you are!
3. Change and ask for change. If you are both willing to make changes, be specific and set realistic goals about what you are willing to do and how things could improve between you.
Natumaini hivi vidondoo vitakupeni mwanga wa kutosha kujua kama umempata mwandani wako sahihi katika valentine hii. I wish you all a happy valentine's day- enjoy!
