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Wenzangu hii mnaionaje?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by mtuporimtupori, Nov 10, 2009.

  1. m

    mtuporimtupori Member

    #1
    Nov 10, 2009
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    Kuna swala linanitatiza kidogo naomba wenzangu mnipe maoni yenu.

    Mimi na wife tunaenjoy maisha yetu ya kuwa pamoja kwa kama miaka miwili sasa tukiwa huku mwisho wa reli, Kigoma na tumebahatika kupata watoto wawili mapacha, Kabla hatuajaanza uhusiano wetu wife alikuwa tayari ana mtoto wa kike wa kama miaka 12 hivi ambaye alimpata akiwa anasoma sekondari na kwa mujibu wa maelezo yake uhusiano wake na baba wa mtoto kimapenzi uliisha siku nyingi. Hivyo tumekuwa tukiishi na mtoto huyu kama binti yangu wa kumzaa bila kumbagua na anapohitaji kwenda kumsalimia baba yake mzazi (ambaye naye yupo hapa hapa Kigoma) tumekuwa tukimpa nafasi hiyo. Kuna swala moja ambalo limekuwa likinikosesha amani. Baba wa mtoto (ambaye siyo wangu biologically) amekuwa akija au kumtuma dereva wake home kila siku za wiki kumchukua mtoto kumpeleka na kumrudisha kutoka shuleni ambapo awali alikuwa antumia school bus. Nimeshamwambia wife mara kibao kwamba sijisikii vizuri huyu jamaa anapokuja nyumbani kila siku kwa ajili ya mwanae na kwamba ingekuwa bora awe anafuatwa na school bus au wapange kituo cha kukutana na mtoto na siyo nyumbani kwetu kila siku. Mara zote tukiongelea suala hili na wife anakuwa mkali na kuniambia kwamba nasema hivyo kwa kuwa huyo siyo binti yangu wa kumzaa. Kwa kweli nampenda sana mke wangu na nisingependa tuwe tunakwaruzana kwa ajili ya hili.

    Hii wenzangu mnaona imekaaje?
     
  2. A

    AG Member

    #2
    Nov 10, 2009
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    Ukimpenda Mmakonde upende na chale zake
     
  3. MwanajamiiOne

    MwanajamiiOne Platinum Member

    #3
    Nov 10, 2009
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    Mh kaka hapana mimi ni mwanamke but that nisingekushauri uintertain hata kidogo. Wifi anakosea tena sana anatakiwa aweke mipaka na awe na msimamo. Kwa sasa hivi mtoto yuko kwako na kama sikosei hiyo shule ulimtafutia wewe so they should follow your rules. Huyo baba wa mtoto anachofanya ni kumwonyesha mtoto kuwa wewe si kitu huwezi hata mpeleka kwa gari shuleni.

    Fanya hivi;
    Waeleze watu wazima wakusaidie kumwelewesha wifi, ikishindikana peleka mtoto boarding kama kufuatwa akafuatwe kule na huyo babake la kama vipi mkabidhi baba mwanae amsomeshe mwenyewe!
     
  4. Z

    Zion Daughter JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Nov 10, 2009
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    U said it well,amrudishe mtoto kwa baba ake halisi ili amhudumie vizuri aftaloo ameshakua hana haja ya kukaa na mama yake.Ili atumie akili kukubaliana na mkewe anaonekana ni mkali/ana tatizo.
     
  5. Kisusi Mohammed

    Kisusi Mohammed JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Nov 11, 2009
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    Kaka kama wampenda mkeo jaribu kuwa makini sana na trend ya huyo jamaa, anatumia kigezo cha mtoto kutafuta ukaribu na demu wake wa zamani, kikubwa hapo ni kuwa na msimamo, kama umpe mwanae huyo baba amlee mwenyewe na mkeo asiende kabisa kumsalimia mwanae, au huyo baba awekewe mipaka ya kuja kumsalimia mwanae, na aje pale tu mtakapomruhusu ninyi na si atakavyo yeye, kiukawaida japo mtoto si wako wa kuzaa lakini majukumu ya malezi yake yote yapo juu yako, kwa hiyo mama yake hana budi kufata sheria zako juu ya mwanawe hata kama ana baba ake wa kumzaa!

    Na istoshe mtoto pia ana haki ya kuchagua aelekee wapi, hebu jaribuni kukaa nae na kumuuliza anapendelea lipi kati ya kuishi nawe au aishi na baba yake mzazi!
     
  6. M

    Msindima JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Nov 11, 2009
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    Kaka hii imekaa vibaya,kwa nini ukimwambia anakua mkali? nini knaendelea kati yake na baba wa mtoto? Mazingira gani yalisababisha huyo baba akaanza kutuma driver awe anakuja kumchukua mtoto na wakati siku za nyuma alikua anatumia school bus? kuna kinachoendelea kati ya mkeo na huyo aliezaa nae.Chunguza utagundua jambo.
     
  7. m

    mtuporimtupori Member

    #7
    Nov 11, 2009
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    Mkuu nashukuru sana kwa ushauri wako. Nitaufanyia kazi. Nimediscuss kwa kirefu na wife kwamba inabidi jamaa achukue mtoto wake ili akamlee mwenyewe badala ya kuja kumfata home anadai eti hataki mtoto wake akalelewe na mama wa kambo. Any way Nitaona cha kufanya.
     
  8. m

    mtuporimtupori Member

    #8
    Nov 11, 2009
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    Asante mkuu kwa ushauri, kwa kweli naona kama wife anataka kuwatumikia mabwana wawili ambao lazima ataambatana na huyu na kumdharau huyu.
     
  9. Nyamayao

    Nyamayao JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Nov 11, 2009
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    hapo ni mkae chini mkubaliane mtoto aende boarding,sio pic nzuri kwa huyo mtoto kabisa....
     
  10. Q

    Quiet Member

    #10
    Nov 11, 2009
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    kaka,
    kama mwanamme mwenzangu ningekushauri uwe mwangalifu sana na hiyo hali.Ni dhahiri kwamba huyo mkeo keshakujua kwamba unampenda kwahiyo anajifanya mkali ili wewe umridhie analotaka na ukimridhia kwa hilo ina maana unampa mwanya huyo bwana wa zamani kuwa na mawasiliano na mke wako.
    ushauri:jiamini na uzungumze na mkeo kuhusu kutokuridhika kwako na hilo na mlitafutie ufumbuzi. kama walivyoshauri wenzangu ,nadhani kama kweli huyo baba mzazi anampenda mwanawe basi ni vyema akamchukua kwake kumlea. vyenginevyo. mtoto wa miaka 12 sio mdogo, wanaweza kupanga sehemu wakakutana lakini sio hapo kwako.
    nakutakia ufumbuzi mwema wa tatizo lako.
     
  11. Tumain

    Tumain JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Nov 11, 2009
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    wewe hakuna cha kukaa chini na kubaliana bana what? wafuate masharti yako au aende na mtoto wake..usi entatain ujinga huo..wanawake hakuna makubaliano mtafikia make a decision let her follow or quit.aagh..lol
     
  12. Shishi

    Shishi JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Nov 11, 2009
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    mmm what your wife is doing is wrong especially kwa mtoto..kama wewe huna uwezo wa kumdrop shuleni na babake anao..the gal will start despising you afterall huna uwezo babake anao. take a firm stand,if she is to continue living with you, u make the rules...if not kwa uzuri aende akaishi na babake. she is 12 u said.. so ni mtu mkubwa she can make a decision too. but ultimately u have to tell both of them how the game is going to played....ste the rules and whorver doesnt feel comforatble cna kiss your *****.
     
  13. Kisoda2

    Kisoda2 JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Nov 11, 2009
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    Nimekuelewa mj1
    big up!
     
  14. Kisoda2

    Kisoda2 JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Nov 11, 2009
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    bravooo ZD
     
  15. Kisoda2

    Kisoda2 JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Nov 11, 2009
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    Kwahiyo wewe baba wa kambo kumlea inakua powa siyo?

    Jinga sana huyo,mtwishe zigo lake akafie mbele,wacha kulemaa mwisho wa siku utakta na mwingine kaja halafu ukaambiwa wako.
     
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