Week end Special

[Ave Ave Maria]

Exactly... nakumbuka tuliizungumzia hii last week... kua mtu (hasa a guy kulala na mwingine) haimaanishi kua hampendi alonae.... Sasa why bother kumuuliza?? lol

Hii ngumu kumeza. A guy acheat alafu bado niseme eti ananipenda? Hapana kwakweli, hili huwa siliamini hata kidogo!

 

[Shantel]

Nimefurahi kuwa umeipenda.

We human beings are not infallible. On occasions we do fail. But occasional failure shouldn't always define who we are. We should strive to improve ourselves, correct the wrongs we do, strengthen our weaknesses, and in the end be defined by the totality of the life we have lived rather than just a few and isolated incidents where we failed.

So to directly answer your question, no, failure doesn't necessarily make you a bad person. In fact failure can make you a better person especially if you use it as a teachable moment and learn from it. But of course it all depends on a lot things and it is not that cut-and-dry.

Thanks NN your answers means a lot....and when its too late,which way can you start corrections from the wrongs!?

 

[Shantel]

Hapa ukikosea spelling tu mtu mzima unaazirika. hivi hamjashtuka kama Shantel kaweka tego? Khaaa! albam yangu siuzi bana

Hata wewe unajistukia....etu brutus????

 

[Shantel]

I know NN... I know what you mean and i know where it is coming from...
She is what she is for she can not be what she is not... and that applies to all....

And of coz nampa HEKO pia...

Dada asha , nilichojifunza katika maisha, wengi wakisemacho sicho wakitendacho... are you agree?

 

[Shantel]

Nazungumzia ideally na ndiyo maana nikaweka kwenye mabano "at least hapa kwenye forum". Mimi on face value I like her stances with regards to relationships.

Mengine nje ya hapa JF siwezi kuzungumzia sana maana sina jinsi ya kuyafuatilia na kuthibitsha mwenyewe.

NN nimekaa na marafiki wengi wa kike na wengine wakiwa kwenye ndoa,, what i know wengi huwa hawaonyeshi wala hawasemi wafanyayo... huwa wanona tu ya wengine hili unalizungumziaje? coz unaweza kuta mtu mzinzi kupita kiasi anahubiri uvumilivu kwenye ndoa na mwingine yuko honest ndio anaweza thubutu hata kumuuliza maswali magumu mchungaji au kiongozi wake wa dini na hili limekaaje

 

[Gagurito]

Unakuta kabibi kana 50 kanavaa kimini halaf kanakulembulia macho, halaf ukikiamkia "shkamoo" kanaitikia "poa tu", tumataftiana ubaya tu

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Kloro hii hali ipo sana, wazee wa kizazi chetu sijui wakoje yan wana behave kama watoto wa miaka 19, nao wanataka wafanye mambo ya mabinti wa kisasa tena pasipo uwoga wowote!

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

NN nimekaa na marafiki wengi wa kike na wengine wakiwa kwenye ndoa,, what i know wengi huwa hawaonyeshi wala hawasemi wafanyayo... huwa wanona tu ya wengine hili unalizungumziaje? coz unaweza kuta mtu mzinzi kupita kiasi anahubiri uvumilivu kwenye ndoa na mwingine yuko honest ndio anaweza thubutu hata kumuuliza maswali magumu mchungaji au kiongozi wake wa dini na hili limekaaje

Uko sahihi kabisa Shantel. Ni kawaida ya binadamu kuona kasoro za wengine na kukosoa wenzao lakini ya kwao hawayaoni.

Mimi katika pita pita zangu mitaani nimeshawahi kumsikia dada poa mmoja akimsema mmoja wa hao wenzake eti ni 'malaya'. Yaani amini usiamini hii niliisikia kwa masikio yangu.

Mfano mwingine ni mega-church pastor mmoja Marekani aitwaye Eddie Long. Huyu bwana alikuwa anahubiri mahubiri ya kupinga ushoga. Sasa mwaka jana ikaja kubumbuluka kumbe na yeye mwenyewe ni shoga na ushahidi ulikuwepo.

Alikuwa anamegana na wavulana wa hapo kanisani kwake. Hao wavulana wakamshitaki kwa kukiuka fiduciary responsibilities zake. Mwisho wa siku wamekuja ku settle nje ya mahakama.

Kwa hiyo hata hapa ni hivyo hivyo tu. Binafsi nasoma maandishi ya mtu na kama nakubaliana nayo basi nitasema nakubaliana nayo na kama pongezi nitazitoa. Lakini kwa wakati huo huo natambua kuwa hapa tunazungumza kwa maandishi tu tena nyuma ya keyboards.

Mtu anaweza akawa tofauti kabisa na anavyojiweka kimaandishi hapa. Lakini kwa vile maandishi ndiyo tunayoegemezea maoni yetu hapa, hatuwezi kuhukumu kwa uhakika kuwa hicho mtu aandikacho ni cha uongo au cha ukweli labda uwe unamjua huyo mtu kwa kiwango binafsi.

But on balance, I agree with you that talking is one thing, but doing is an entirely different beast altogether.

 

[Shantel]

Shantel nafikiri mpaka hapa tumefika... Jibu utapata in between posts na hivo kukamilisha ombi lako.... Be good dear... Sasa napumzika....

Nashukuru sana ashadii kwa kweli nimepata majibu mengi sana ya maswali niliyokuwa nuliza, nilikuwa harusini kesho nafikiri tutaendelea fresh

 

[Da Dinnah]

NN nimekaa na marafiki wengi wa kike na wengine wakiwa kwenye ndoa,, what i know wengi huwa hawaonyeshi wala hawasemi wafanyayo... huwa wanona tu ya wengine hili unalizungumziaje? coz unaweza kuta mtu mzinzi kupita kiasi anahubiri uvumilivu kwenye ndoa na mwingine yuko honest ndio anaweza thubutu hata kumuuliza maswali magumu mchungaji au kiongozi wake wa dini na hili limekaaje

kwa kweli, marafiki naowajua wengine ni member humu tofauti wakiandikacho..nimeamini msemo wa dont judge the book by it cover
kutamani kutakuwepo na ma stranger nao watakuwepo.....inategemea na uhusiano uliokuwa nao huwezi ng'ang'ania kuwa na uliyenae hata
kama unaona haiwezekani, u better try any chances ambayo itafanya ukutane na mtu atakaekufanya uwe happy

 

[Da Dinnah]

Uko sahihi kabisa Shantel. Ni kawaida ya binadamu kuona kasoro za wengine na kukosoa wenzao lakini ya kwao hawayaoni.

Mimi katika pita pita zangu mitaani nimeshawahi kumsikia dada poa mmoja akimsema mmoja wa hao wenzake eti ni 'malaya'. Yaani amini usiamini hii niliisikia kwa masikio yangu.

Mfano mwingine ni mega-church pastor mmoja Marekani aitwaye Eddie Long. Huyu bwana alikuwa anahubiri mahubiri ya kupinga ushoga. Sasa mwaka jana ikaja kubumbuluka kumbe na yeye mwenyewe ni shoga na ushahidi ulikuwepo.

Alikuwa anamegana na wavulana wa hapo kanisani kwake. Hao wavulana wakamshitaki kwa kukiuka fiduciary responsibilities zake. Mwisho wa siku wamekuja ku settle nje ya mahakama.

Kwa hiyo hata hapa ni hivyo hivyo tu. Binafsi nasoma maandishi ya mtu na kama nakubaliana nayo basi nitasema nakubaliana nayo na kama pongezi nitazitoa. Lakini kwa wakati huo huo natambua kuwa hapa tunazungumza kwa maandishi tu tena nyuma ya keyboards.

Mtu anaweza akawa tofauti kabisa na anavyojiweka kimaandishi hapa. Lakini kwa vile maandishi ndiyo tunayoegemezea maoni yetu hapa, hatuwezi kuhukumu kwa uhakika kuwa hicho mtu aandikacho ni cha uongo au cha ukweli labda uwe unamjua huyo mtu kwa kiwango binafsi.

But on balance, I agree with you that talking is one thing, but doing is an entirely different beast altogether.

Nimependa michango yako sana NN kwenye hii thread

 

[BlackBerry]

Shantel, kama umetamani au uko kwenye process jiulize mara mbili kwanza, nilivyoona kama uko dilemma Mungu akusaidie usiwe unatamaniana na mtu mmoja hivi humu, maumivu, PM,kwa kweli kutamani ila inabidi uangalie unatamani nani na wapi

 

[AshaDii]

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Asha Dii.... Sijui nisemeje! Are you kinda consenting this? Kama ndo hivo basi acha tu wananume wetu wachiti so long as si kwamba hawatupendi ni hamu tu wanapunguza au wameanguka majaribuni and its just owkey!

Dear I am not consenting... I am just being realistic... Na ni kitu ambacho siwezi sema na kuadmit in front of my Man - But I do know it is there... bht frankly speaking wake wangapi wanajua kua waume zao weme cheat, wanaishia kugombana, but life goes on ndani ya nyumba... Inauma and it does not make it right... ila it is real. For further ufafanuzi Please Check Post # 117 in this thread...

 

[AshaDii]

Hii ngumu kumeza. A guy acheat alafu bado niseme eti ananipenda? Hapana kwakweli, hili huwa siliamini hata kidogo!

Hayo maneno katika post yako nilikua naongea wakati kigoli....lol.. Hio imenifanya nijue hujaolewa.... Ukiolewa you will understand where it is coming from... Hopefullly

 

[AshaDii]

Dada asha , nilichojifunza katika maisha, wengi wakisemacho sicho wakitendacho... are you agree?

Daima mwanadamu husema kilicho kizuri masikioni mwa watu, na kile ambacho anaona kitamfanya aonekane bora.... Hivo i agree. Whereas haina maana woote wanaoongea yalo bora hawafanyi yalo bora... Hata hivo nisiongee zaidi for naona NN kaizungumzia kwa upana zaidi...

 

[Ave Ave Maria]

Hayo maneno katika post yako nilikua naongea wakati kigoli....lol.. Hio imenifanya nijue hujaolewa.... Ukiolewa you will understand where it is coming from... Hopefullly

Kwa hiyo we umeamua kunijaji kabisa.....lol! Kusema kweli huwa nayaona hayo mapenzi ni ya upande mmoja ambayo binafsi siyaamini kabisa hivyo mwanaume akicheat naona kama he is not into me, and that mapenzi yamebaki upande wangu tu! Sasa mapenzi ya upande mmoja ya nini wakati najua hatma yake ni kuumia tu? Hata kama nikiwa kwenye ndoa kwakweli......,labda nisigundue manake nitakuwa kama napiga danadana kwa ulimi tena mpira wenyewe ukiwa hauna upepo!

 

[Tulizo]

Binadamu hatujaumbwa kama Malaika na nitakuwa mnafiki kama nitasema binadamu ambaye amejifunga na mpenzi wake basi na moyo wake umejifunga. Big No.. Moyo Wa binadamu hauridhiki kumbuka tunajifunza kuuridhisha Moyo na kujifunga na wapendwa wetu. Hapa ndipo tunapata heshima, urafiki, mapenzi na maisha hasa yale ya ndoa.

Upendo na maisha ni pale tu tunapoweza kupigana na kushinda changamoto au kwa lugha nyingine vishawishi ambavyo viko ndani ya miili yetu na mawazo yetu daima. Hapa ndipo sehemu ambapo Wivu umelala..Ni kwa jinsi gani unaweza kukubali kuwa mpenzi wako anaweza mpenda mtu mwingine..yeye kama binadamu. Kama unaona unaweza kuzuia basi utakuwa na wivu kupindukia, lakini kama unaamini vyote vyawezekana na unamwachia mwenzako kama binadamu kupambana navyo hapo degree ya wivu inapungua..

Binafsi, siwezi kushangaa kama mke wangu kama atamzimikia mtu mwingine kutokana na quality fulani..hata kama atakuwa anawasiliana na kushauriana kwangu sio issue..ni human instinct na inaonyesha yeye ni kamili..lakini Issue itakuwa tu kama atashindwa kudhibiti vishawishi vya mwili na kuanza ku-cheat.

All in all, yes, unaweza kumpenda Stranger kutokana na vigezo fulani kwani wewe ni binadamu.. Ku-upgrade huo upendo hasa kama tayari umeshajifunga hapo ndipo tunasema No.. You should control yourself!

 

[bht]

Dear I am not consenting... I am just being realistic... Na ni kitu ambacho siwezi sema na kuadmit in front of my Man - But I do know it is there... bht frankly speaking wake wangapi wanajua kua waume zao weme cheat, wanaishia kugombana, but life goes on ndani ya nyumba... Inauma and it does not make it right... ila it is real. For further ufafanuzi Please Check Post # 117 in this thread...

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nimekuelewa lakini hii bado ni ngumu sana kuikubali. Inauma zaidi ya jipu la moyo.
Hata kama mtaendelea kuishi, hiyo dosari nadhani itaathiri sana ndoa and things will never be the same.

Mimi hata nikishuku tu, mood inabadilika kabisa. As you have said kwa wakati mwingine tunaweza kuwa na maneno mengi kabla hayajatusibu....once yakitukuta labda tutakuwa na msimamo tofauti.
sharing that thing aisee...mmmmh! I am very possessive and selfish when it comes to HIM. Kajisemea nyumba kubwa ...nina wivu wa kukata mtu shingo.

 

[nyumba kubwa]

Nakubaliana na wewe. Kuna tofauti kati ya kubwabwaja JF na kuongea na marafiki. Mfano mimi hamna mtu rafiki ninaye msimulia maisha yangu wala kujifanya kungwi. But I can write anything JF kwa sababu hamna anayenijua. Ndio maana naipenda JF. Sioni sababu ya mtu ku pretend sehemu kama hii ambayo hatujuani. Here it is like unaongea siri yako kwenye mtungi. Ndio maana kuna watu waanzisha thread za hajabu nyingine wanaonyesha there immoral behavior. That is what they real are and they dare to reveal their true side because hamna anayewajua hapa JF.

NN nimekaa na marafiki wengi wa kike na wengine wakiwa kwenye ndoa,, what i know wengi huwa hawaonyeshi wala hawasemi wafanyayo... huwa wanona tu ya wengine hili unalizungumziaje? coz unaweza kuta mtu mzinzi kupita kiasi anahubiri uvumilivu kwenye ndoa na mwingine yuko honest ndio anaweza thubutu hata kumuuliza maswali magumu mchungaji au kiongozi wake wa dini na hili limekaaje

 

[nyumba kubwa]

Hayo unayoongea yana ukweli tu kama wewe ni single. Kwa mtu aliyeolewa there is no such a thing like trying another chance.

kwa kweli, marafiki naowajua wengine ni member humu tofauti wakiandikacho..nimeamini msemo wa dont judge the book by it cover
kutamani kutakuwepo na ma stranger nao watakuwepo.....inategemea na uhusiano uliokuwa nao huwezi ng'ang'ania kuwa na uliyenae hata
kama unaona haiwezekani, u better try any chances ambayo itafanya ukutane na mtu atakaekufanya uwe happy

 

[Nsiande]

Inawezekana shantel kumpenda mtu hujawahi muona ila nafikiri tunapaswa kucontrol hisia zetu hasa kama umependa wakati tayari upo katika mahusiano mengine.<br />
Kama umependa mtu kwa sababu umemsikia tu au unamsoma hapa jeief nakushauri kuwa makini, sio wote wanayoyaongea ndio wanayoyatenda....... Anaweza kuonekana msafi kumbe ni mchafu. Watu wa mtandaoni hupenda kuonekana namna wangependa wawe (wengi huonekana sivyo walivyo). Wapo wanaopenda kuonekana ni wastaarabu/wakorofi kumbe sivyo. Wengine hupenda kuonekana ni watu wa dini, wengine kuonekana ni watoto/wakubwa, kuonekana wameoa/hawajaoa.<br />
Kila mtu ana maisha yake ya kimtandao na yanaweza kuwa tofauti na maisha yake ya nje.<br />
Control hisia zenu angalau mtakapoonana na kuendelea kufahamiana zaidi ndio mnaweza kupiga hatua nyingine mbele.

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Thanks for this extremely useful post!