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Naombeni ushauri ndugu zangu!!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by goodmother, Jul 21, 2012.

  1. g

    goodmother Senior Member

    #1
    Jul 21, 2012
    Joined: Jul 21, 2012
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    SALAAM wanaJMF!! mimi ni mgeni hapa, lakini kutokana na post nyingi nilizosoma humu moyo wangu umeridhia kwamba nitaweza kupata ushauri ambao unaweza kuniondoa kwenye msongo wa mawazo niliyonayo!!,. Mimi ni mama mwenye umri wa miaka 28 nimeolewa na nimebahatika kupata watoto wa 3, kinachonifanya niombe ushauri ni mume wangu kuwa na na wanawake wengi, kwa kifupi tumeishi kwa miaka 9 hadi sasa, yeye ana miaka 39. kwamuda wa miaka yote 9 mwenzangu amewabebesha wasichana wa kazi 2 mimba, anamtoto wa miaka 2 ambaye amezaa na mwanamke ambaye yeye hata haeleweki anafanya kazi gani, amezaa tena na muhudumu wa baa mtoto ambaye ana mwaka sasa halafu kwa sasa kuna muhudumu mwingine wa baa ana ujauzito wa miezi 6 na wote hao akisha wabebesha ujauzito anawageuzia kibao yaani hawataki wala watoto hawatunzi, hivi karibuni ameanzisha uhusiano na muhudumu mwingine wa baa, ( mwanaume huyu siyo mlevi ni msomi wa chuo kikuu anapesa za kutosha na ana kampuni kubwa tu ya uchimbaji madini ambayo pia mimi ninashare kwenye hiyo kampuni) niliwahi kumlalamikia kuhusu hii tabia yake, aliacha kujihusisha na wasichana wa kazi za ndani lakini kwa hao wa nje haonekani hata kujali malalamishi yangu zaidi aliwahi kuniambia niamue nitakavyo yeye anaweza kuishi bila mwanamke na nikitaka kuondoka niondoke na watoto wangu. mimi nimelelewa bila baba na isitoshe watoto wanampenda sana kwa ukweli huwa anamahusiano mazuri tu na watoto. yaani hii Ndoa mimi ndiyo niamue kuvumilia uchafu wake au niondoke yaani ki ukweli naumia na matendo yake lakini watoto wangu pia sitaki waishi kama mimi nifanyeje??? huwa hashauriwi na mtu niliwahi kumkuta na mwanamke tena nyumabani kwetu nikaenda kumweleza wazazi wake alimwambia baba yake naona umechoshwa na mkeo unataka kumwoa na mke wangu alinibeba juu juu mbele ya wazazi wake, huku baba yake akipelekwa Hospital kwa kupandwa na presha., ushauri pls!!!
     
  2. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jul 21, 2012
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    duh pole saana
    kwani talaka unaionaje?

    otherwise subiri gonjwa....
     
  3. N

    Neylu JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jul 21, 2012
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    Dah! Unauvumilivu wa pekee.. Kwa kweli mie nisingeweza kuishi na huyo mwanume tena wala haogopi dunia hii ilivyochafuka anatembea bila kutumia kinga.. Hapo amua moja dada, uendelee kuishi na huyo bwana huku ukiusubiria ukimwi au uachane nae ukawe salama..! Huyo mwanaume ni HATARI sana.
     
  4. Blaine

    Blaine JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jul 21, 2012
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    tobaa!!

    ondoka tuu hapo. he is not being safe so unaweza kupata magonjwa. single motherhood sio adhabu kwa watoto walee tuu vizuri wakiwa wakubwa watakuelewa uamuzi wako, ukiendelea kuvumilia huu upuuzi unaweza kupata ugonjwa na wanao wakakosa mama. watoto wanahitaji stability na familiarity, ukiwaxpose kwa wanawake wengi watashindwa kujua huyu yupi ni yupi na wawaite mama. mama mdogo, nyumba ndogo.
     
  5. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jul 21, 2012
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    Goodwoman, nafikiri unaona maisha bila mumeo hayawezekani. Endelea kuishi naye, na huku mkiweka Mazingira mazuri kwa future ya watoto in case wote mkaRIP.

    Maana wasipoishi bila baba, mwisho wa siku wataishi bila baba na mama.

    Kama mnaweza kaa Kama dada na kaka na huyo mumeo, baki mlee watoto; kama hamuwezi then au ondoka au uanze kuwarithisha watoto mali mapema.
     
  6. nanchi

    nanchi Member

    #6
    Jul 21, 2012
    Joined: Jan 29, 2012
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    Hilo jambo zito dada,mkiachana mnavuruga familia,mi naona umnyime hiyo kitu na siku akiomba mwambie ukampime ngoma na baada ya miez 3 umpime tena ndo umpe asikupe hiv.
    Ikibidi ukamshtaki kwa wazee ukiona haitoshi nenda kwa kiongozi wenu wa kiroho atajisikia aibu ataacha ujinga.
     
  7. Mwali

    Mwali JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jul 21, 2012
    Joined: Nov 9, 2011
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    Jaribu kuanzisha account yako ya pekee bila kumuhusisha
    Pia kua makini sana na share options zako, fatilia mwenyewe
    Kwa kifupi endelea kuishi nae kama baba watoto na sio mume
    Hakupendi na hajali maisha yako, si amesha kwamia uondoke?

    Kwa vile hutaki kuachana basi endelea kuishi hapo hapo
    Ila hakikisha hakuna ku-do tena, asije akakuambukiza
    Inaonekana huko anako enda anaenda peku bila kujali
    ikotokea, basi hakikisha unajikinga (hopping it's not too late)
     
  8. g

    goodmother Senior Member

    #8
    Jul 21, 2012
    Joined: Jul 21, 2012
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    hapa ndiyo nawaza nilishamwona Mwanasheria akanipa ushauri juu ya Talaka, natafuta mawazo ya watu wengine kwani sijawahi kuongea na mtu juu ya jambo hili, hata mwanasheria sikumweleza sababu.
     
  9. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jul 21, 2012
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    ungekuwa dada yangu ningekubeba juu juu
    talaka angeituma kwa njia ya posta
     
  10. Abdulhalim

    Abdulhalim JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jul 21, 2012
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    hapo cha kwanza ni kuenda kupima na kujua hali yako. first thing first. pole na mihangaiko ya dunia.
     
  11. g

    goodmother Senior Member

    #11
    Jul 21, 2012
    Joined: Jul 21, 2012
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    mimi huwa sipendi ugomvi kwa kuwa kweli yeye ni mgomvi, akaunti ninayo watoto wangu wanasoma shule za gharama yaani ada kwa mwaka hao wawili ni 39 ml, anachosema nikiondoka nisimuhusishe chochote na watoto. msaada wa kisheria ili aendelee kuwalipia ada wanangu mimi sishindwi kuwapa lishe malazi mavazi hata wakiugua pia naweza kuwatibia.
     
  12. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jul 21, 2012
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    elimu yako please?
     
  13. g

    goodmother Senior Member

    #13
    Jul 21, 2012
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    nashukuru Mungu nilipima Tarehe 6 mwezi huu nipo salama.
     
  14. g

    goodmother Senior Member

    #14
    Jul 21, 2012
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    form 4.
     
  15. Roulette

    Roulette JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jul 21, 2012
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    Inaonekana huyu mtu wako ana matatizo ya kisaikologia. Kweli mapenzi hayana mpaka, ila hii tabia yake ya kulala na housegirls na barmaids sio mapenzi, ni kutanga tanga.
    1. Inaonekana alikuoa mapema sana, yeye akiwa tayari fully adult, wewe ukiwa ndio bado unaingia adult life. now that you are more mature he is not interested in you anymore (ukitaka unaweza kuondoka, as he says).
    2. There is a common characteristic to all those women: they are all rather poor and vulnerable woman (young?) who play a "servant" role in his life.
    3. Pia inaonekana he is committed to waste his life sababu anapoenda huko hatumii kinga, na inajulikana barmaids ni vulnerable group as far as HIV is concerned.
    4. He is VERY selfish: hajali maisha yako, ya watoto wako, wala ya hao wanawake na watoto wao. Akisha mzalisha hivo he moves to his next target, does the same sh*t and th series continues.
    Tafuta mtu anae muheshim, na mtu huyo amshahuri akapate psychological assistance au psychiatric treatment kabisa. In the mean time acha kabisa kumpa unyumba na kama ulikua unamjali sana (as a servant) stop it right away and let him do his share of household tasks. Kama mna housegirl futa, tafuta mwanaume tena makamu, sio kijana. Utakua umemsaidia sana.
     
  16. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Jul 21, 2012
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    Usifanye naye tendo la ndoa bila protection, na kama unauweza ucelibacy then kaeni mtunze watoto.
     
  17. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Jul 21, 2012
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    kazi unayo
    kubali kuwasomesha wanao shule ambazo utazimudu
    sio lazima shule hizo hizo

    na msaada wa kisheria wa hisa zako
    hama haraka
     
  18. g

    goodmother Senior Member

    #18
    Jul 21, 2012
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    Bahati mbaya sina kaka Nimelelewa na mama na yeye ameshatangulia mbele ya haki, mimi ndiyo nawasomesha wadogo zangu wa tatu.
     
  19. g

    goodmother Senior Member

    #19
    Jul 21, 2012
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    nataka nifanye mambo taratibu sitaki ugomvi naye, kwani pamoja na hayo alinioa akiwa hana hata nyumba kwa sasa ana nyumba tatu na ghofa moja pamoja na mgari sita yote kutokana na kampuni tuliyofungua naye.
     
  20. hovyohovyo

    hovyohovyo JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Jul 21, 2012
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    Pole. Kama nmekusoma vizuri, inaonekana watoto ndiyo hasa kikwazo cha ww kuachana na huyo mpenda 'kei'. Kwamba wewe umechangia kiasi gani ktk yeye kuwa 'mwingi', unajua ww. Lakini, unaonaje kuendelea kuishi na mtu amabye tayari roho ya mapenzi ishakutoka?, UKIMWI je?, ukifa na ukimwi, hao watoto itakuwaje?-si watalelewa na baba yao tu, au watakuwa yatima kabisa?. je mwanaume anaposema hakuhitaji, anaweza kuendelea bila ww, unadhani kuna penzi hapo??, Kisha bado umri wako unakuruhusu kabisa kuanza upya-miaka 28!! Ushauri: Fanya mkakati wa kuachana naye rasmi, ili upate na haki zako zote. Maisha ya binadamu ni mafupi, hayahitaj 'worries'.
     
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