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Maskini Sophia wangu... Sasa najutia!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Kongosho, Mar 23, 2012.

  1. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Noamba niweke kisa kinachonitesa kila siku.

    Ilikuwa mwaka 1976, nikiwa nimemaliza chuo cha uuguzi na kupangiwa kazi hospitali ya Mbeya.

    Baada ya kufika Mbeya na kuanza makazi rasmi niliita wadogo zangu 2 wa kiume na kuanza kuishi nao.

    Wakati nafanya kazi, nilitokea kuwa na mahusiano na dada mmoja aliyekuwa anasomea 'nursing', kiukweli nilimpenda sana, sana, sana, huyu alikuwa akiitwa Sophia. Naamini hadi leo hata Sophia alinipenda sana.

    Baada ya mahusiano kama miaka 2, Sophia alipata ujauzito na alikuwa tayari kuolewa na mie na mimi nilikuwa tayari kumuoa.
    Nikawajulisha ndugu zangu niliokuwa nao kuhusu uamuzi wangu wa kumuoa Sophia kabla ujauzito haujaonekana lakini walinipinga kwa nguvu zote.

    Nimetokea kwenye ukoo ambao hatukuruhusiwa asilani kuoa ama kuolewa na mtu wa kabila lingine. Hii ilipelekea kutengwa na ukoo mzima.

    Baada ya ndugu woote kukataa na kutishia kunitenga, nilijikuta nimemkataa Sophia kwa hofu ya kutengwa.
    Sio siri iliniuma sana na hadi leo inaniuma nikikumbuka uso wa mshangao na kuchanganyikiwa wa Sophia baada ya kumkana simfahamu na wala sijawahi muona mbele ya mama yake. Alikuja na mama yake kutaka kujua msimamo wangu na binti yake. Kweli alilia kiasi cha ajabu sana.

    Baada ya kama wiki moja, alinifuata peke yake akanijulisha mama yake ameamua kumpeleka hospitali akatolewe ujauzito, sikuwa na jinsi nilimuacha akatoa ujauzito na kuendelea na masomo yake.

    Mwaka 1979, nilirudi nyumbani, nikaoa mwanamke wa kabila langu kwa baraka za ukoo mzima na kuhamia kufanya kazi hospitali moja katika mkoa wa Mwanza.
    Mwaka 1981, nilipata mtoto wangu wa kwanza na sasa tuna watoto 4.

    Baada ya maisha ya ndoa, ndio nikagundua/hisi machozi ya Sophia yaliniachia laana? Wakati mwingine nashindwa tofautisha nimeoa/nimeolewa.

    Nilijikuta, baada ya kuoa nimeanza tabia ya ulevi, ikafikia kipindi nikawa siwezi fanya chochote bila pombe, na mke nae anakunywa pombe vile vile. I was an addict, bila kujua nimeingiaje kwenye alcoholism hii.

    Mwaka 1989, nilisafiri kikazi kwenda Morogoro, dah, kweli dunia chungu, nilitaharuki siku moja gari imesimama pembeni yangu, mwanamke akashuka ndani ya gari kwa kufunguliwa mlango, sikuamini alikuwa ni Sophia alinifuata kwa furaha zote na kunisalimu. Alikuwa ameshaolewa na mwanajeshi mmoja mwenye cheo chake, nadhani major general.

    Nilijiona kama nyongeza ya wanamme hapa duniani. Tuliongea na kuongea, hakuonekana kuwa na kinyongo, roho iliniuma kama mtu kanipokonya tonge langu mdomoni.

    Mwaka 2000, ndipo niliamua kuacha pombe, baada ya kulewa na kuokotwa mtaroni. Walidhani nimepoteza uhai na kunihifadhi kwenye mochwari ya dispensari moja kabla ya kesho yake asubuhi kuhamishiwa hospitali kubwa, niliamka nakujikuta mochwari, kuanzia hapo nilifanyia kazi tatizo langu la pombe na kuacha.

    Taztizo linalonisumbua sasa, ni hii ndoa, naishi kama kifungoni. Mke wangu bado mlevi anarudi muda anaotaka. Inanibidi nifanye kazi ya ubaba na umama maana mwenzangu haeleweki kabisa.

    Nikikumbuka aliyekuwa chaguo langu, roho inaniuma sana. Nisingekubali kusikiliza ndugu labda ningeishi ndoa ya furaha.

    Popote uliko Sophia, jua bado nakukumbuka sana, na huwa najutia sana nilichokifanya. Nimeandika hapa ili kupunguza pressure ndani yangu walimwengu msinisulubu kwa komment zenu, ndoa inanisulubu vya kutosha.

    Na kwa ambao hamjaoa wala kuolewa 'follow your heart' nduguzo hawatakuwepo wakati familia yako inaparaganyika.

    Asanteni :( :( :(
     
  2. Bushloiaz

    Bushloiaz JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Pole sana kaka,hii story yako itatusaidia wengi ambao hatujaoa/kuolewa kufanya uamuzi sahihi
     
  3. Michael Scofield

    Michael Scofield JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Hiki kisa cha jamaa yako au ww mwenyewe?
     
  4. ossy

    ossy JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Mar 23, 2012
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    pole mkuu...waswahili walisema "majuto ni mjukuu"
     
  5. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Najaribu kuconnect dots hapa nijue mhusika hapa ni nani
    Konnie hebu tufafanulie tafadhali
     
  6. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Mar 23, 2012
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    kuweni makini sana, haya maisha haya.

    Asante Bushloiaz.

    Wakati mwingine natamani nimwache mke, lakini naona watoto watahangaika, mie mwenyewe kuanza kusettle tena haitakuwa rahisi.

     
  7. Mtalingolo

    Mtalingolo JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Mar 23, 2012
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    teh teh teh
     
  8. Mtalingolo

    Mtalingolo JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Wakati mwingine tumia neno mkuu badala ya kaka/dada
     
  9. A

    Ave Ave Maria JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Mmmmmmhh.......?????????
     
  10. Mtalingolo

    Mtalingolo JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Habari yako kaka, mie niko hapa pembeni naangalia wachangiaji, japo napenda kuadd my comment...
     
  11. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Du Kongosho, naona umeamua kumpotezea Smiling Saint; good job!
     
  12. A

    Ave Ave Maria JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Mi mwenyewe bado loading........
     
  13. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #13
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    Mmh, kwa nini MS?
    Kuna siku mtu unakumbuka maasi ulofanya roho inauma sana.

     
  14. Jaluo_Nyeupe

    Jaluo_Nyeupe JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Mar 23, 2012
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    hadithi yako nzuri je inatufundisha nini?
     
  15. N

    Ngekewa JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 23, 2012
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    Lipi linalokuuma hasa kumwona sophia ametulia au ndowa yako kuwa haijatulia? Unaweza kuachana na hiyo ndowa ukajaribu tena kutafuta moyo unataka!
     
  16. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Nimewaomba msinisulubu.
    Hamwezi jua what am going thru right now.

     
  17. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Kila kitu kinaniuma.
    Nilichokifanya kwa Sophy, ndoa hii inayosumbua.

    labda leo tu ilikuwa siku mbaya, nikakumbuka kama vile imetokea jana.

     
  18. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Mar 23, 2012
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    sitaki ujifunze chochote.
    Mie najipunguzia matatizo yangu moyoni.

     
  19. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Kipipi, usugune tu.
    Na hiki kizazi cha haki sawa kinadhoofisha ndoa sana.

    Kua uyaone magorofa ya Kariakoo.

     
  20. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Mkuu salama kabisa aise
    mambo yako poa kabisa
    Mi bado kujua nisemeje ila mwandishi kweli kajitahidi kuandika lililompata

    Mkuu endelea kuload mpaka baadae unaweza kuconnect dots ukapata la maana

    Sikuthulubu ila najaribu kujua what u mean here and hii story imekuwa intended to who au ni nani ilimtokea
    Ila listen to your heart most na sio ndugu wanasemaje maana always utaishia kupoteza kitu cha muhimu sana ambacho kilikuwa kiwe bora kwa maisha yako na ukajikuta umeangukia kwenye matatizo matupu kutokana na kuambiwa na ndugu hili usifanye
     
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