Mahondaw
JF-Expert Member
- Apr 9, 2013
- 62,139
- 156,557
I Why does love come unexpectedly?
I never thought I've come to experienced such thing like this. But I'm still thankful that I encountered such emotion.
Love can bring you light and happiness, but pain will always follow.
It's really true that you wouldn't know that you're in love if you're not being hurt.
He's just a random guy whom I've known since grade school. We talked if needed or if we unexpectedly bumped each other. And time goes on and on.
Until I turned mature . He asked my number. Shortly, we became friends. Close friends as they say. Every hour, were checking each other. He never asked if I have a boyfriend and so as I to him. What matters is we enjoyed company.
I know also that there were lot of girls who like him, but still I don't mind them.
As time passes by, I am not aware that I already had a feeling for him. I fell hard.
And it keeps growing every single day.
One time, he brought me inside the disco bar. It's my first time though, because partying is not my thing. We dance the whole night, and he brought me back at home. Actually, that night I know that there 's really something wrong is going to happen the tomorrow. It feels so weird. It's like it's my last moment to be with him. I told myself, 'I just give myself a chance to be happy tonight.'
The next morning, something came up. One of my cousin, who happened to like him also, confronted me. She's really mad at me, for not giving her a chance to dance with that guy. And everything changed.
I distanced myself with him. He's always texting me, but I never replied. Since my cousin is always with me. And another girl came, who happened to like that guy also. And were living in the same apartment. Three of us. Me, my cousin, and that girl named Jell.
And we became friends also.
Whenever the guy texted me, I pushed him to just text Jell. It's not a good feeling guys, but I have to. And I just heard that they became text mate.
And I choose to moved in a different place. I can't bear to see them together. (I keep my feelings with me only)
I even told myself, what if I'll tell him about my feelings?
But realization hit me. If he have a special feelings for me, he will never court someone else, he'll court me instead. So, I let go. It's not easy though, but I have to.
Then one day, the bomb just exploded. They're officially boyfriend-girlfriend. I felt so down. It's like only me is standing inside that four corners of our classroom. And I left. I go home. I cried hard. A silent cry.
The worst thing just got more painful. We're friends. Meaning, we bound to meet together. Whenever they asked me to go out with them, I just make some excuses. I don't know how am I going to react around them. It's really my first time. I never had a boyfriend, eve rsince. So it's so hard for me to adjust my feelings.
We meet one time. The pain that I've feeling is really unexplainable. I can't even looked at his eyes. I greeted him but I keep my eyes busy, just so I can't looked at him. That moment I badly want to cry! I didn't even lasted there for five minutes. I can't hold my tears longer. The worst feeling ever! The thought that he'd never been mine,is more painful. I don't have the rights to feel this way, for damn sake!
But my heart is so stubborn!
And whenever they're having arguments, they'll asked some advice on me. Whenever he cannot contact his girlfriend, he'll asked me. But even if it's killing me inside, I also told them to not give up each other. HURT ? It's not enough to explained how I felt every time I make some advised for them. It's torture.
I tried to have a boyfriend. Just to divert my damn feelings, unfortunately, it's hurt even more. I'm not ready to let go. And it's not good to use someone just to heal my wound. So, I stopped. We only lasted for three days. At least, not a big damage to his part.
I just let my feelings to continue. I told myself, time will heal. The more I control it, the more it hurts, so I just let it.
One year had passed. My conscience is eating me. Jell and I became best friend. And I feel like I'm a traitor! I'm betraying my own friend. So, I tried to have a boyfriend.
I tried to be true. I focus with my boyfriend. My second boyfriend to be exact. But I just found out that he's a two timer. He's also having affair with someone else, so we ended up to break-up.
The funny thing is, I'm not even hurt, the time that we broke up. It feels like, I already know that we're not going to lasts. We become friends, up until now.
And the breaking news is, I'm still hurt with the guy that never been mine. My first love. A year ago, they also broke-up. But I never hope to be with that guy, because it's not good that he's already my best friend ex, then me....nah, I don't recycle things. lol
I admit, I still have feelings with him, it's still here, but I'm just waiting for the time that it will beat again for someone else. I still misses him. I'm still fixing my broken heart right now. On my own.
Never use someone just to be healed. Human is not a thing.
I know the feeling of being broken inside, but it wouldn't stop me for believing in the power of LOVE! This pain won't stop me from smiling.
GOD will reveal the right person for you.The one who will love you the way you deserve to be loved. We only live once, so let's make the best out of it.
Enjoy life! Life is beautiful! Live simply. Love freely!
( just a piece of advice)
Copied.
I never thought I've come to experienced such thing like this. But I'm still thankful that I encountered such emotion.
Love can bring you light and happiness, but pain will always follow.
It's really true that you wouldn't know that you're in love if you're not being hurt.
He's just a random guy whom I've known since grade school. We talked if needed or if we unexpectedly bumped each other. And time goes on and on.
Until I turned mature . He asked my number. Shortly, we became friends. Close friends as they say. Every hour, were checking each other. He never asked if I have a boyfriend and so as I to him. What matters is we enjoyed company.
I know also that there were lot of girls who like him, but still I don't mind them.
As time passes by, I am not aware that I already had a feeling for him. I fell hard.
And it keeps growing every single day.
One time, he brought me inside the disco bar. It's my first time though, because partying is not my thing. We dance the whole night, and he brought me back at home. Actually, that night I know that there 's really something wrong is going to happen the tomorrow. It feels so weird. It's like it's my last moment to be with him. I told myself, 'I just give myself a chance to be happy tonight.'
The next morning, something came up. One of my cousin, who happened to like him also, confronted me. She's really mad at me, for not giving her a chance to dance with that guy. And everything changed.
I distanced myself with him. He's always texting me, but I never replied. Since my cousin is always with me. And another girl came, who happened to like that guy also. And were living in the same apartment. Three of us. Me, my cousin, and that girl named Jell.
And we became friends also.
Whenever the guy texted me, I pushed him to just text Jell. It's not a good feeling guys, but I have to. And I just heard that they became text mate.
And I choose to moved in a different place. I can't bear to see them together. (I keep my feelings with me only)
I even told myself, what if I'll tell him about my feelings?
But realization hit me. If he have a special feelings for me, he will never court someone else, he'll court me instead. So, I let go. It's not easy though, but I have to.
Then one day, the bomb just exploded. They're officially boyfriend-girlfriend. I felt so down. It's like only me is standing inside that four corners of our classroom. And I left. I go home. I cried hard. A silent cry.
The worst thing just got more painful. We're friends. Meaning, we bound to meet together. Whenever they asked me to go out with them, I just make some excuses. I don't know how am I going to react around them. It's really my first time. I never had a boyfriend, eve rsince. So it's so hard for me to adjust my feelings.
We meet one time. The pain that I've feeling is really unexplainable. I can't even looked at his eyes. I greeted him but I keep my eyes busy, just so I can't looked at him. That moment I badly want to cry! I didn't even lasted there for five minutes. I can't hold my tears longer. The worst feeling ever! The thought that he'd never been mine,is more painful. I don't have the rights to feel this way, for damn sake!
But my heart is so stubborn!
And whenever they're having arguments, they'll asked some advice on me. Whenever he cannot contact his girlfriend, he'll asked me. But even if it's killing me inside, I also told them to not give up each other. HURT ? It's not enough to explained how I felt every time I make some advised for them. It's torture.
I tried to have a boyfriend. Just to divert my damn feelings, unfortunately, it's hurt even more. I'm not ready to let go. And it's not good to use someone just to heal my wound. So, I stopped. We only lasted for three days. At least, not a big damage to his part.
I just let my feelings to continue. I told myself, time will heal. The more I control it, the more it hurts, so I just let it.
One year had passed. My conscience is eating me. Jell and I became best friend. And I feel like I'm a traitor! I'm betraying my own friend. So, I tried to have a boyfriend.
I tried to be true. I focus with my boyfriend. My second boyfriend to be exact. But I just found out that he's a two timer. He's also having affair with someone else, so we ended up to break-up.
The funny thing is, I'm not even hurt, the time that we broke up. It feels like, I already know that we're not going to lasts. We become friends, up until now.
And the breaking news is, I'm still hurt with the guy that never been mine. My first love. A year ago, they also broke-up. But I never hope to be with that guy, because it's not good that he's already my best friend ex, then me....nah, I don't recycle things. lol
I admit, I still have feelings with him, it's still here, but I'm just waiting for the time that it will beat again for someone else. I still misses him. I'm still fixing my broken heart right now. On my own.
Never use someone just to be healed. Human is not a thing.
I know the feeling of being broken inside, but it wouldn't stop me for believing in the power of LOVE! This pain won't stop me from smiling.
GOD will reveal the right person for you.The one who will love you the way you deserve to be loved. We only live once, so let's make the best out of it.
Enjoy life! Life is beautiful! Live simply. Love freely!
( just a piece of advice)
Copied.
